Living as a woman

[CLARRISA]

In an earlier Thread i announced my first time out shopping..well since then i haven't been able to stop myself at all. I booked just a few days off work and my feminine side exploded..every morning i've been getting dressed then popping out to the shops. I think today i was more read than the others as i think my wigs getting tatty and i just can't seem to find many flattering items in the warddrobe, i really need a good clear out and get some more in style items, but it seems so hard to find the types of clothes i see other women wearing. I see woman with nice Tunics over Jeans or leggings or frilly blouses. I can't seem to find a decent Tunic anywhere. I was in Tk max earlier going through the aisles, i'll see a woman and think "hmmm i like her top" Then i'll go to look for it and Nothing. There were moments i was thinking maybe its easier to do this in drab, as when enfemme although i'm enjoying it i feel like i'm up against the clock, ie i'm thinking about my bladder..which only gives me an hour max to get in and out.

The fear of going out though has really dissapated, Once your're in amoungst the aisles your're just lost in the crowd, sometimes i'll look at people and naturally they may look back and you get that sinking feeling "do they know"..My instinct tells me theyre probably not sure and when in doubt they just ignore you...

Yesterday i went into my local minimart to get milk...and looked straight at the young male clerk who i recognise and there was no hard look in his eyes of "somethings wrong here"..I thought i must be passing..Then later i tried something different on, White leggings and a brown halter top that didn't cover the primal area completely so i tucked with gaffertape and cloth..it looked smooth initialy and i went down to Matalan, i was getting quite a few iffy looks, i thought i must check a mirror and i could see that my tucking wasn't too good, also the wind must have done something to my wig...it was a "I'm a TV get me out of here " moment..

In the evening i wanted to try a skirt and hose with flat shoes...i went to a local newsagent, and the looks i was getting made me feel "oh sh*t, i've overdone it now i think i'm pushing my luck here", anyway i crossed the road and a car Hooted at me like a Wolf whistle gesture...that did feel good..but i realy don't want to bring any attention to myself..I think i'm just trying to gauge the right going out dressing balance at the moment...

Right now i'm wearing my new darkpink pleated T-shirt ,new Beige sandals, and very short black shorts that i'm extremely tempted to try out..i'm wondering "am i losing contol or should i think "so what other girls do it."

Any way thats my update on living as a woman, Soon my holiday will be over and i'll back to drab land..sorry this is so long..

[Deborah Jane]

Great story Clarrisa, i love your Just do it approach to going out whenever you like!!!
I also thought it was cool that when things seemed to start going wrong [tuck, wig] you just carried on!!

I don,t think you are losing control, it sounds to me like you are enjoying your voyage of discovery :)

[Amy Hepker]

Don't worry what others think, just enjoy the moment. Make sure you look good before going out and don't give it a second thought, you are a female and that's that. Don't be afraid of going into the restrooms just go like you have been doing it all your life. Make sure you go into the one you you are dressed for. I have seen so many GGs down here in Florida that look like they could be either male or feamle and they don't care what you think and you should not either. JUST ENJOY!!!!!!

[CLARRISA]

following up..i lost my nerve wearing the shorts and put on worn look jeans..have just come back from the mini-mart...Felt so natural...no death looks...the assistant just carried on with it, i was just another girl in the queue..Now my heads saying go to the park and do a bit of sunbathing in my new yellow bikini...HELP ME! i'm losing it...i think i just want to do as many girly things as possible b4 its drab time..i've i always wanted to sunbathe as a woman..can't wait till i fix up my garden,just need to arrange it so that all view points are blocked...

[Carol A]

The only thing I can say is once out always out, the more you do it the more comfortable you are with yourself. I have been going out for about 6 or so years and yes every now and again you get a look or and unkind word. Just part of the fun sweetheart, and remember not to over dress. :hugs:

[Eileen]

Clarrisa it sounds like you are doing great. To things to remember are it gets easier each time and the more you go out the more difficult it is to go back to guy mode. Also follow Carol's good advise.

Eileen

[deja true]

Clarissa, hun.....

Yeah getting a handle on style for our selves is difficult at first....and shopping at big stores is hard, too. Untill you have a feel for your comfortable style it's hard to visualize what those clothes on the hangars look like on our frames...it takes ages to be able to do that. It sounds like you're not into trying them on in the store yet, so...

Catalogue shopping is better for that 'cos it shows the clothes on models, and we can better compare the look and hang of the clothes to what we see around us. Find some catalogs that are appropriate to your age group and the style you like, and study the ladies and their looks and their accessories and their presentations.

Your kinda young by the look of your avatar. So for young and stylish, but not over the top, I'd suggest American Apparel and Urban Outfitters to start. Good quality and style, but still inexpensive... Simple designs that mix and match really well... They appeal especially to the 20 somethings.

And as some of the girls have already said...It's mostly in the attitude!

Have fun, sweetheart!

[charlie]

Hello Clarissa!
You are getting out and about! It is fun, exciting and has a sense of danger all in one. I have been going out for about a year and am constantly changing styles as my fashion sense and feelings change. I have found that going to the Goodwill and second hand stores is a great cheap way to find clothes and get fairly up to date fashions. Buying a dress still with a tag on it from neiman Marcus from the Goodwill for $4.99 beats going to the Fashion Bug or Ross for lots more. Also, when you have worn it a few times and are tired of it, you simply give it back to them (you got your $5 worth) and find new stuff!

[Jilmac]

Clarissa, you look very pretty and feminine in your avatar picture, I don't understand why you wouldn't pass in public. Perhaps you're trying so hard that you're making mistakes. I know how you feel when you see a lovely lady in a pretty top and can't find it in any store. Have you tried shopping at the thrift shops? Also, you may be getting read because you may not be dressing age appropriately. If your wig is a bit tatty you might be able to rescue it with a washing and brushing. Look around and see what the women your age are wearing and try to blend in. Blending in is the most important step in passing. Give yourself time and surely you will be the girl you hope to be in public and private. Luv and :hugs: Jill

[CLARRISA]

Thanks for all your brilliant advice, realy like the thrift store and catalogue ideas, and i will be studying and making mental notes on styles and women my age..thanks again..