Which Bathroom Do I Use???

[Bobbie_1544]

Which bathroom do you use? When I am out and about in my community here in Los Angeles. Maybe at the Mall or Restaurant, and I am in TG Mode, I am usually faced with a problems “unique” only to our world. Which bathroom should I use in this establishment? With so much news coming out about bathroom use in and around our community and Transgender People. This can be a hellava decision to make while out in public. With State and local Governments making policies and laws about Transgender peoples’ use of bathroom or restrooms.. Whichever you call them. Sometimes I would rather go out back in the alley and take a leak, then to make a decision like this one.

Now to use the men’s restroom is asking for some reason “SEX” No!! I just wanted to relieve myself “Thanks but No Thanks”. Or to be harassed by a homophobic guy who thinks you are looking at him. “No Darling” I have a man “Thanks” Let’s go to the woman’s side, “I see you have had your eyebrows done or where did you get your nails done Darling”? Sarcastically! I look better then you anyway, would run threw my mind….LOL Let’s don’t even throw in the Children Factor!!! OMG!!

With our society being “So Not Educated” on Transgender People, and congress just now learning about the Transgender World and Discrimination against us . We are labeled as “The 3 P’s I call them” Perverts, Pedophiles and Prostitutes. Or we are involved with the “Porn” Industry. So which restroom do you use? XOXOX Bobbie

[pamela_a]

Hi Bobbie and welcome. I think if you search you will find numerous threads here asking the same question. I personally use the ladies room. In my opinion it's the safer of the 2 options and I have yet to experience any problems with it. If you do use the ladies room then please be sure act like a lady and sit. If you are uncomfortable with that I've found most newer public places have a family/unisex facility in them.

-Paula-

[erin_nicole0112]

When I was attending East Carolina University I often went to the library dressed without issue until the restroom issue came up. I asked one of the staff which restroom and was instructed to use the male even though dressed completely, heels, hose, etc. I used the male restroom 3 or 4 times over the course of a week or so. I was approached by a supervisor upon entering the library one evening and told that some patrons had concerns with my using the men's room while dresssed in female attire. Apparantly the main objector was a girlfriend of a male student. Anyhow I was told by the superviser that there was no issue with my choice of attire and actually complimented on my choice of clothing and presentation. She asked if I would be comfortable using the staff restroom if necessary. I had no issues and actually was more comfortable. For the remaining two years I was a student there I used the staff restroom. I have not really had issues otherwise and usually ask the establishment I am in what is there preference but try to avoid having to do that if possible.

[Bobbie_1544]

When I was attending East Carolina University . I have been followed to the bathrooms and in by Security Gaurds since I have been dressin back in my 20s and now I am 44 and Wow! What can you do? That was nice of them to let you use the Staff bathroom! But he people in general donot understand.

[sissystephanie]

If you are presenting yourself as a woman, and acting like a woman, then by all means use the ladies restroom. You would be asking for trouble by going into the mens room. And not just from security! Most states now have laws that allow CD's or TG's to use whichever restroom corresponds to the way they are dressed. If you are confident in yourself, just go in and take are of business like the lady you are! Sitting, not standing!!

Sissy/Stephanie

Lady on the outside, but man underneath!

[Samantha B L]

Hi Bobbie, More than 30 years ago I used to use the women's restroom. I was ages 15-18 at the time I used to do that. If I shaved close enough and I wore just the right type of shirt and pants along with my long hair I actually looked like a short somewhat overweight female if the lighting was dim and if you didn't look me over too discerningly so that you would then notice I was a guy! I would move sort of quick in those women's restrooms so that nobody could get a long hard look at me and figure out that I was a guy. I even fell asleep in a stall in a women's room at a shopping mall once for maybe 20 minutes.

In a suburban county nearby St.Paul/Minneapolis(I live close to there in Wisconsin)some person or persons has managed to get these sort of like "Unisex" or "Transgender" restrooms set up in lots of the local businesses. I think that's a step in the right direction and maybe that's the comprimise measure that most politicians and business people will go with. But I used the women's for years until someone told me I could get arrested as a "predator".

[suzy cool]

If you do use the ladies room then please be sure act like a lady and sit. -Paula-

That conjours up an interesting image.

[renee k]

When I'm out in public and the need arises it's the womens room. I just go in take care of business, wash my hands and give my makeup and hair a quick check. And leave.

Huggs, Renee

[SweetCaroline]

To answer your question. As a general rule, use the ladies room. Tho your best bet is to use a single occupant or "family" restroom. Most places in big cities in the US have one.

You might also want to check out the laws in your state regarding Transgendered rights, or call the place you plan to go to before hand. You might be surprised.

[DanaR]

What you might want to do, even before going shopping or whatever, is call ahead and ask the place (store, mall or whatever other business) where you are going; that you are transgendered and will be at their establishment and might need to use the restroom; which one could you use? If they tell you that you would have to use the men's room (if you are MTF) or ladies room (if you are FTM), tell them you will go somewhere else to shop or whatever. Like everything else, they want your business. If you get an okay from the phone call, jot down the name of whoever you talked to; just in case. As long as you aren't doing anything wrong, there shouldn't be a problem.

This might be a great thing to do anyway, bringing to their attention that we are there shopping or whatever.

Years ago, I attended a convention and there was an evening at the Moose lodge with some drinking and other activities (billiards, cards and some other things). After I arrived, I was told if I needed to use the restroom we were to use the men's.

Anyway I was playing pool with one of the Moose members and we were talking about how much fun we were having; and I mentioned that I'd probably be leaving fairly soon. She asked me why I was going to leave and I answered that I would probably go back to the my hotel (to use the restroom) and go the hotel lounge. She then asked me, why don't you use the restroom here? I told her that we were told that if we needed to use the restroom, we had to use the men's restroom and I didn't feel comfortable using the men's room dressed as I was. She agreed, and then informed everyone that we could use the ladies room; she was the one that set the rule.

[Diane CDN]

I use the women's facilities when out. There is no reason in my mind not to. Going into a men's washroom as I am is ludicrous.
Not sure about where you are but here no matter what mode one presents, you can use either (in male mode) Conduct is the main thing. What do they put on a door when the men's room is closed?....use the womens ....lol !

Diane
>^..^<

[Holly]

It can be confusing as illustrated in yesterday's comics...

68052

(Apologies to Shelly :D)

[Magickman]

I always use the men's room, even when dressed up. It never occurred to me to cross-restroom.

[Sandra]

If presenting as a woman then use the ladies rest room.