Toilet Paranoia (anyone can respond)

[Flameboy]

As a trans guy, I obviously always use the men's loos. Nowadays, I don't have any worries about walking in or out - that's not the sort of paranoia I'm talking about. I know that's a big deal for many guys at the beginning of transition, and it was for me also, but I'm past that now - I'm confident that I pass and won't get any hassle in that way.

However, I do have a certain amount of paranoia about the way my pee sounds. I know that might sound stupid, but I'm very aware that the sound of my pee is completely different from the sound of most other guys' pee hitting the toilet bowl. I've tried masking it by flushing the toilet, but that generally doesn't give me long enough to do what I need to do. I've tried putting loo roll down the loo to stop the noise, but that's not very effective - plus, it's a waste of paper! I end up having to exercise extreme control in just letting it trickle out, and even then I get paranoid that the length of the pee will give me away.

So, has anyone got any ideas how I can overcome this? It's not so bad in a big, busy toilet where there's lots of people going in and out, and plenty of taps, hand dryers etc to mask the sound, but in a small place with maybe just one cubicle, I get really worried about it.

Any tips or suggestions would be welcome. Or am I just worrying unnecessarily - would other guys even notice the difference in sound?

Dave

[Kieron Andrew]

would other guys even notice the difference in sound?
To be honest i doubt it very much...men are just not THAT observant in my opinion....especially in the bathroom...they are concentrating on whats in front of them lol

[Tamara Croft]

Take a bottle of water in with you, then pour it down the toilet :)

[Dalece]

Well by sounds I heard many differnt Pee sounds coming from males in my time. Some men have differnt shaped or medical problems with there Man Bits. I just don't know what would be a solution Tamara got a good idea a glass of water. I did see on you tube a thing where a girl can use this device and stand to Pee as a real male. But i don't remeber what is was called i do remeber it was in Germany. But you put in your pants under the Female parts and go. And that would work in a stall type place made not in front of a urinal.

[Emily Anderson]

I think you're worrying unnecessarily. Besides, I don't think most people actively listen to other people peeing. Maybe I'm wrong, but it doesn't sound like a very interesting pastime to me.

[suzy cool]

Relax. No-one listens unless it sounds like a cart horse or someone is trying to play a tune. And if it sounds like a cart horse its because the guy either had eight pints or had his prostrate removed. Either way no-one will think much of it.

[Tristan]

I worried about this too at one point after an ex of mine brought it up (he was trans too) and brought it up with my boyfriend (bio male) and he assured me that he's never been bothered to listen to another guy's pee sounds and would never notice if it was different and doubted if any other guy would.

[Sallee]

it is interesting to see that FtM have some of the same paranoias that us MtF's have.
Don't worry about it no guys in any restroom that I have been in has ever paid any attention to the sound of pee hitting the loo. We are to busy worrying about our own short comings and what the other guys might be thinking about us. So as the"goodfella's" say "forgetaboutit"

[AmandaM]

No one cares. If they do, they won't mention it, cause men talking to other men in bathrooms is taboo.

[GypsyKaren]

No one cares. If they do, they won't mention it, cause men talking to other men in bathrooms is taboo.

Exactly. You must never talk, listen, look, and in most cases involving men's rooms, breathe.

Karen Starlene :star:

[Cai]

I generally stand at the toilets, even in the stalls. The thing with me is that I don't pass well enough to be sure no one will say anything, but I feel once they see my feet standing in the stall, they won't question me.

Depending on how confident I'm feeling (often if I've been drinking :heehee:) and on the setup/visibility in the bathroom, I'll have the nerve to use a urinal. I'm lucky enough to be able to actually use a urinal without absolutely requiring an STP, though it's easier.

[Felix]

I know the feeling flameboy, I exercise great causion when usin the cubical in the mens so as no one susses me out but it does mean it takes longer which means it could arrouse suspition :eek: As for bein over it im pretty used to going in the mens loos now it doesn't really bother me. Its where I belong anyways xx Felix :)

[Stacy GG]

as said by others most males go by the male unspoken bathroom rules, you don't talk, acknowledge or comment to other men in the bathroom so as long as you don't act like your ackward no one will even notice.

[TxKimberly]

as said by others most males go by the male unspoken bathroom rules, you don't talk, acknowledge or comment to other men in the bathroom so as long as you don't act like your awkward no one will even notice.

ROFL - Stacy GG got it 100% correct!

I saw a YouTube link here once that described the "rules" and "Etiquette" for the male bathroom and the funniest thing about it was that it was spot on! One of the most important rules is that you don't pay attention to others and they don't pay attention to you. I guarantee you no guy is sitting in the stall next to you giving any thought to the sound of your going to the bathroom.

Another thing that works in your favor - most people don't realize there ARE FTM's. Hell, I've been a CD all of my life and only discovered FTM's were out there about 8 years ago.

Even if my two points above were NOT the case, I don't think that guys suspecting a FTM in the bathroom are likely to react with the same . . . hostility. . . that women finding a MTF in the bathroom might be inclined to. Forgive my being less than PC with the following, but I am try to put myself (and you) into the minds of others. Guys don't worry about "perverted" women sneaking into their bathroom to sneak a peak or anything else. Pretty sure most men have the attitude "Bring 'em on!"

Please trust me on this, I wouldn't knowingly give bad advice to a fellow TG - Guys do NOT pay attention in the bathroom, make it a POINT not to pay attention there, and most certainly will never exit the bathroom while telling someone else "Hey, that guy pees weird and I think he may be a woman!".

[Cai]

Even if my two points above were NOT the case, I don't think that guys suspecting a FTM in the bathroom are likely to react with the same . . . hostility. . . that women finding a MTF in the bathroom might be inclined to. Forgive my being less than PC with the following, but I am try to put myself (and you) into the minds of others. Guys don't worry about "perverted" women sneaking into their bathroom to sneak a peak or anything else. Pretty sure most men have the attitude "Bring 'em on!"

Yep. I know I've been clocked a couple of times at least (they give me a sort of sideways glance, looking at me while trying not to) but no one has ever said anything to me. I've had more issues trying to use the women's restrooms, in recent months.

[metalguy639]

Hey Dave, I'm sure its not really an issue adn men will most likely not even think one way opr the other about it. I have personally also thought the same thing while in the stall myself. I pass really well and would hate for my pee to give me away LOL.

[waspookie6]

No worries Dave, really.
My ex had a prostate problem and had to sit to go no matter what and because of sometimes enlargement, it probably didn't always 'sound right'. He *never* worried about the other people in there too - they had their own business to concentrated on.

[halfman_halfamazing]

ive found a way in both men and womens' restrooms. i get embarrased in the ladys' room cuz it just sounds gross. anyway to avoid such a problem a scoot up far enough nothing exactly hits the water directly and instead slides down.
my problem is actually legs in the mens' room.

[CaptLex]

Or am I just worrying unnecessarily - would other guys even notice the difference in sound?

Dave
Dave,

Sounds like you got your answers from those who should know. Personally, I never thought about it. If somebody is that into keeping an ear on what's going on in the next stall, then I can only pity them 'cause they seriously need a life. :p

[metalguy639]

If somebody is that into keeping an ear on what's going on in the next stall, then I can only pity them 'cause they seriously need a life. :p


LOL well said!

[Maria2222]

Frankly, I think most guys purposely ignore other guys in the rest room because they don't want to appear interested in another guy in this somewhat intimate(?) closeness which might indicate that they were not a normal guy.
So the bottom line is don't worry about someone thinking your pee sound is odd.
Now if you're cutting about fifty farts every time you do it, that might be a different matter. :)

[Niya W]

However, I do have a certain amount of paranoia about the way my pee sounds. I know that might sound stupid, but I'm very aware that the sound of my pee is completely different from the sound of most other guys' pee hitting the toilet bowl. I've tried masking it by flushing the toilet, but that generally doesn't give me long enough to do what I need to do. I've tried putting loo roll down the loo to stop the noise, but that's not very effective - plus, it's a waste of paper! I end up having to exercise extreme control in just letting it trickle out, and even then I get paranoid that the length of the pee will give me away.

So, has anyone got any ideas how I can overcome this? It's not so bad in a big, busy toilet where there's lots of people going in and out, and plenty of taps, hand dryers etc to mask the sound, but in a small place with maybe just one cubicle, I get really worried about it.

Any tips or suggestions would be welcome. Or am I just worrying unnecessarily - would other guys even notice the difference in sound?

Dave

Dear Dave, trust on this. If you are in the bathroom and some guy is listening to the sound of you peeing, you have another problem. Thats some thing guys just don't pay attention to.

[pamela_a]

Dave I gotta say that is just not something to which guys pay attention. I will admit, however, I have experienced the same thoughts/apprehension in reverse when I'm using the ladies room. Don't even think about it. As others have said, if someone is paying that much attention to the sound you may have other problems.


Now if you're cutting about fifty farts every time you do it, that might be a different matter. :)For that you will either receive an award or get booted out of the room.

-Paula-

[Nicki B]

If ytou're a guy and you're embarrassed about anything, it's easy.. You whistle. Tunelessly. As long as necessary...


IME experience, female plumbing tends to make you empty your bladder very quickly, in comparison to a GM - presumably that's what you're meaning? Don't squeeze so hard, for a start?

[Lora Olivia]

Well no else may notice but i do. I HAVE to make sure it is hitting the water and push for several hard squirts instead of the one long ahhhhhhhhhh, and of course you gots to grab the handful of paper, most guys don't wipe

[valenstein]

Another vote for "guys don't notice". I hadn't even thought of it until I saw this thread. The only issue you might encounter is that, every so often, one drunk guy will come in and completely break the no talking rule. Usually it's a loud proclamation to everyone in earshot that he has to "pee", but in less gentle wording. He might even try to engage you, I just smirk without looking at him (to acknowledge his profound sense of humor) and leave asap.

[Sally24]

I saw a YouTube link here once that described the "rules" and "Etiquette" for the male bathroom and the funniest thing about it was that it was spot on! One of the most important rules is that you don't pay attention to others and they don't pay attention to you.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IzO1mCAVyMw

I personally try to hear as little as possible in the men's room. I think that's the same for your average guy. My favorite bathrooms are the few that have nice music playing to give everyone a little privacy. Don't worry about it!

[Ásfríðr]

To be honest i doubt it very much...men are just not THAT observant in my opinion....especially in the bathroom...they are concentrating on whats in front of them lol
s'true, nobody's listening. even if they are, men are very much less confrontational in the loos. most wouldn't want to make a friend in the toilets lol. the attitude is really 'just go in, do yer thing, get out; maybe even wash your hands if you're feeling fancy'. thats it

[_Sarah_]

in..do your thing. wash hands...out

no words exchanged.
urm...yea that's about right.

[Katrina]

Personally, I'm pretty observant in general, and I don't recall ever noticing the sound of men's urination while in the "loo". Quite frankly, I'm just praying that I don't hear much sound that generally comes from another opening that is directed at the toilet.

That said, now that you brought it up, I'm going to start noticing. Thanks a lot. ;)

[CD Susan]

I just don't understand the concern here. I think the sound of a stream of urine hitting the water in the toilet will sound the same whether it is coming from a male or female. How can it be any different? I do not worry about these insignificant things whether in either mode that I happen to be in.

[sterling12]

The only time I have seen guys react at all, is when some drunk or other dufus is making an incredible amount of noise when he does the other thing! Then, you will usually see frowns, and a strong desire to get out of there as quickly as possible.

Can you use the urinals? (I'm thinking post-op here,) I can't remember any guy making noises using the urinal. My dad taught me a long time ago that polite gentlemen didn't make a lot of commotion in the bathroom. It probably sounds strange today, but back as a young sprout, when he was teaching me how to use public restrooms; it was suggested that I try to aim at the side of the bowl, and not directly into the middle of the standing water. Why? Less splash and less noise.

So, I wouldn't worry to much about the "sound." My Guyself feels that it's much ado about nothing.

Peace and Love, Joanie