New "problem"

[Kate Simmons]

I've recently changed my name since I've gone to a different "level". My name changes are always indicative of that. As Salandra, I was pretty much balanced as Ericka and Richard. Now that I'm going by Arianna, I've more or less pulled out all the "stops" and am not afraid to be more daring.

I never was interested much in short skirts, cleavage and showing legs in the past and had preferred the "girl next door" look. By encouragement though, I realize I have a lot of potential in this respect and last night I totally amazed(and somewhat scared) myself with the image. So what's the "problem" you may ask. The problem is that the process is seductive and once I got a taste of it, I wanted more. Now I know how a Playboy Bunny feels when she gets all trussed up and is the center of attention. I've gotten my share of that the past few weeks by dressing this way at the club.

The prep work (shaving, makeup, etc.) is second nature to me but all of this other stuff is new and makes me feel good, perhaps too much so. What I question is where am I going with this? I have to be careful as it is very easy to lose myself in the process and in the excitement my motives can become confusing. The "offers" I get from some guys don't help matters any and can be quite flattering and the image presented is very powerful and it boggles me to say the least.

The bottom line is that these are new feelings I need to deal with and looking good can be a two-edged sword. Is it really something I want to do? Time will tell I guess.:)

[DAVIDA]

Hi Arianna!
Well, it seems that evolution is a never ending process, huh? I am sure that whatever you do and where ever you end up, that the journey is going to be fantastic! I really wish that we(Jean & I) were closer to you. I think that you would be one great friend!

[deja true]

Arianna/ Salandra/Ericka/Richard...

The student dares become the teacher...

In my earliest days here, it was you foremost of all that awakened me to the idea that our confusion and internal turmoil was the result of self doubt and not following our own heart's directions.

All we grasshoppers can say is...Do what feels right. Do no harm. Live your own life for you.

"If a man will begin with certainties, he shall end in doubts, but if he will be content to begin with doubts, he shall end in certainties." Francis Bacon

[Angie G]

Well Arianna looks like you still growing in your cross dressing life. Good for you just don't let it get away from you hun keep it slow and think first. :hugs:
Angie

[Tina Dixon]

Nothing wrong with wanting to look sexy girl, hell have fun with it.

[Kate Simmons]

Thanks my friends, I needed to get the feedback. It's not so much that I'm afraid of being myself but it's kind of both awesome and a bit scary at the same time what we can accomplish if we truely put our mind to it. I do plan to "work it" as they say in any case.;):)

[Karren H]

There are levels?? I really thought that as Ericka you were at some kind of pinnacle...

And I'm still having a hard time keeping track of all your names... Lol Bet your driving the DMV crazy?

[Tamara Croft]

Nothing wrong with wanting to look sexy girl, hell have fun with it.I was going to say the same thing, you just go with what you want to do, nothing wrong with it at all, we all want/need to feel sexy at times ya know :hugs:

[Daintre]

Hi Arianna, you know, I never realized that was why you changed your name every once and a while. It makes sense to me now, personally, I think that is a great way to start a new phase of your life experience. One thing I noticed though, was that in the title of the thread you put New "problem".....I was surprised you didn't say New "opportunity because you are one of the most positive people I know."

[suzy cool]

So you are no longer balanced. Hmm.:heehee:

[tricia_uktv]

Arianna, I crave more. I think its all about how much you wish to diminish the conditioning you are living with. I love the fun of it all but you are right; I am too random as Tricia and need to adjust a bit. But just a little because I don't want to lose my fun side too much. Good luck xx

[Nicole Erin]

Hi Arianna, you know, I never realized that was why you changed your name every once and a while.

I gave up trying to keep up with her name changes. :heehee:

[charlie]

Hello Ariana!
I am surprised that you would feel strange getting sexy. Erika used to jump up on the stage and be the life of the party! Those long legs, nylons, heels and short skirts are definitely seductive to a CDer though. They just feel good and get lots of compliments. I was buying below the knee skirts and dresses and trying to fit in when I went out....but the sexier look won out again.

[Nikki A.]

Ariana, remember on an earlier post you said you had achieved balance. I said that you were just starting a new journey. Anyway my friend and role model best of luck on this new journey. I'll give you a call real soon, lots of doings in the past week and I need to catch up.

[unclejoann]

i have been growing a lot myself lately. taking bigger chances and seeing my self in a different light. i am going to start thinking of a new name too, this girl is growing up too.

[DonnaT]

I reckon you are experiencing what some refer to as the 'slippery slope'.

Euphoria can grease the slope a bit. Just keep a level head about you, while you enjoy the journey.