broke student can't afford tri-ess, cheaper option?

[gagirl1]

i was looking around at the tri-ess website and it really caught my eye. however, i'm a poor student still and don't know if i can afford it. i've already joined a yahoo group, but they don't meet regularly. is there a cheaper option out there? i'm still pretty nervous and shy about this and a group of people i could meet with would be very helpful. thanks all! i'm just dying to meet people like me.

[Nicole1]

I don't know where you are; but at the Triess here, the girls are really great. You can go to a couple of meetings before joining (Free!). Go to a couple of meetings and meet the girls, then talk to one of the board members and explain your situation. They may be able to work out a payment schedule to help you out, or maybe some of the girls can "sponsor" you or something like that. At least, go to the free meetings and get started. You might even find out about other groups in your area. There are several in this area.

Hugs:hugs:

Nicole

[Rachel Morley]

Where do you live? If it's traveling distance from Sacramento you can come to any of our River City Gems (http://www.rivercitygems.org/) events for only a $5 door fee. If you are a member it's free! :)

[gagirl1]

i live in ga, so river city gems is not really close. i must have missed the part about the free meetings. i will definitely check those out.

[Nicole1]

i live in ga, so river city gems is not really close. i must have missed the part about the free meetings. i will definitely check those out.
Gagirl1:

It most likely doesn't mention the free meetings on the web site; but go ahead and make contact. They know that not everyone will become members, so they give you a couple of meetings to see if you want to join. Good luck.

[gagirl1]

thanks for the inside info! i will be near atlanta in a week. i'll see if they are having a meeting

[Bev06 GG]

Where do you live? If it's traveling distance from Sacramento you can come to any of our River City Gems (http://www.rivercitygems.org/) events for only a $5 door fee. If you are a member it's free! :)

MMM I'd like to come to one of those. Not sure where we are holidaying next year but I shall have to bear that in mind Rachel.
Bev

Hi Girls,
How many of you actually know one another and meet away from this forum. I just got to wondering when I read this thread. I have met some of you at Sparkle, Tamara, Cheery, Kieron and Nicki B and its great when you can actually meet someone face to face. I know a lot of you American girls live quite near to one another.
Bev

[sandra-leigh]

I know a lot of you American girls live quite near to one another.

Two members of the same local social club I go to have joined up here; I know of at least one other from the club that reads it as a guest but hasn't joined.

But other than that... Ummm, no: you could drive through large parts of Western Europe in the time it would take to get from where I live to the nearest "big city" (Minneapolis, 7 hours drive.) Minneapolis to Chicago is faster than Minneapolis to here -- and from here to the nearest Canadian "big city" is more than 14 hours drive. Distances here in "America" are large enough that it's pretty much faster to fly to Japan to meet than for those of us in the center of the country to drive to meet someone else :sad:

[gagirl1]

i've flown to japan, as well as driven 13 hours from michigan to atlanta. i didn't realize how isolated canada can be. that is a long way to travel. i would have to plan at least a week for vacation to make the trip worth it.

[Nicole Erin]

i was looking around at the tri-ess website and it really caught my eye. however, i'm a poor student still and don't know if i can afford it. i've already joined a yahoo group, but they don't meet regularly. is there a cheaper option out there? i'm still pretty nervous and shy about this and a group of people i could meet with would be very helpful. thanks all! i'm just dying to meet people like me.


How much is it to join tri-ess? I know nothing of the group 'cept it is for CDs.

Anyways you can do a web search for the city, state, and then a term like "crossdresser support group" or similar terms.

For helping, I guess it depends on what you need help with. Most CD groups are pretty cool, at least you will find potential friends, and no one will judge you. I think each group out there is a little different but the worst that will happen is you will go to one, be bored, and decide it is not for you.

[gagirl1]

$42 per year, for only hetero crossdressers, which i don't agree with, but it's the best option i've got.

i just don't want to be judged. that's the biggest thing for me.

[Inredsatin]

Hi,
As a member of Tri-Ess and on the board of directors for Sigma Epsilon in Atlanta i encourage you to call the number on the web for us and talk to our Outreach Director. If you wish to join we do allow you to attend 2 meeting to get to know us and see if we are what you are looking for. I strongly encourage you to contact us to see.
Hugs
Brenda Jones
Board Member at Large
Sigma Epsilon

[Ashley Lynn Swift]

$42 per year, for only hetero crossdressers, which i don't agree with, but it's the best option i've got.

i just don't want to be judged. that's the biggest thing for me.

only allow's hetro crossdresser, what do they mean by that cd that prefer the oppisite sex when the dress, or the same sex when they dress, ohh well I guess I'll never be allowed in their little club since I'm Bi, both in male mode, and in girl mode.

[Deena]

I read several posts that present some misconceptions about TRI ESS. It is true that TRI ESS membership is primarily for heterosexual CD's and their families. However if you dig a little deeper you will find that membership in TRI ESS may include transsexuals, gays, bi's and even commercial enterprises as "Friends of TRI ESS" as long as the basic precepts of TRI ESS are not infringed upon. TRI ESS embraces and supports the full spectrum of the GLBT world. TRI ESS is not a dating "club" and does not permit hanky panky nor does it permit or encourage the use of drugs and alcohol. I ask that people who post know what they are talking about before doing so.

Deena

[AmandaM]

Hi,
As a member of Tri-Ess and on the board of directors for Sigma Epsilon in Atlanta i encourage you to call the number on the web for us and talk to our Outreach Director. If you wish to join we do allow you to attend 2 meeting to get to know us and see if we are what you are looking for. I strongly encourage you to contact us to see.
Hugs
Brenda Jones
Board Member at Large
Sigma Epsilon

Don't they have a sliding scale for the poor?

[DonnaT]

Some schools have LGBT clubs.

[gagirl1]

my school has a LGBT club, but it is very small and i don't think it is accepting of crossdressers. lots of gay people where i live, but not nearly as many crossdressers (as far as i know).

[DAVIDA]

Jean and I were members of Sig Ep in Atlanta last year. It was a great experience and I met a lot of good people. Some who are members of this forum. Things happened and we did not join this year. I miss going and seeing everyone. Maybe this next year we will be able to join again.

Bev, I met Kandi through this forum. We see one another from time to time. She came to the house just the other evening. She was dressed and had been to a meeting here in Augusta. I had no idea that there was a group here. It was also Kandi who told us about Tri-Ess.

Hi Brenda!
I miss you all!

[lisalove]

I tried to join my local TriEss chapter and told about myself honestly. And was told flat out, that because I am bi, I couldn't join.
Now really what do they think, I'm gonna go and use it for a pick up joint, Hell No I ain't. I was gonna go to meet and make friends with others like me. Well to hell with them and their narrow mindednest. Their loss I say.

[meg_dc_00]

If your a student, join the school LGBT group; you're bound to meet good people.

[Deidra Cowen]

I read several posts that present some misconceptions about TRI ESS. It is true that TRI ESS membership is primarily for heterosexual CD's and their families. However if you dig a little deeper you will find that membership in TRI ESS may include transsexuals, gays, bi's and even commercial enterprises as "Friends of TRI ESS" as long as the basic precepts of TRI ESS are not infringed upon. TRI ESS embraces and supports the full spectrum of the GLBT world. TRI ESS is not a dating "club" and does not permit hanky panky nor does it permit or encourage the use of drugs and alcohol. I ask that people who post know what they are talking about before doing so.

Deena

Ya gotta be straight to join...at least here in GA. I was asked to come to a meeting in Atlanta when I first started dressing...was honest and told them I was gay. I was not eligible therefore and that was in a conversation with the admissions officer. But it really did and does not bother me. Tri Ess gives str8 CDs and their wives a way to deal with CDing. Many a CD gets to dress and have a lot of fun since their Wives know there is no hanky panky as you call it, and a lot of the wives are involved too. But its a club you have the right to make your rules.

By the way I know a lot of the TriEss girls in Atlanta and they are a great bunch! I hope GaGirl goes and checks out a meeting.

[meg_dc_00]

Ya gotta be straight to join...at least here in GA. I was asked to come to a meeting in Atlanta when I first started dressing...was honest and told them I was gay. I was not eligible therefore and that was in a conversation with the admissions officer. But it really did and does not bother me. Tri Ess gives str8 CDs and their wives a way to deal with CDing. Many a CD gets to dress and have a lot of fun since their Wives know there is no hanky panky as you call it, and a lot of the wives are involved too. But its a club you have the right to make your rules.

By the way I know a lot of the TriEss girls in Atlanta and they are a great bunch! I hope GaGirl goes and checks out a meeting.

Wow, its amazing that they discriminate against tgirls who aren't "straight"...

Discrimination, on any level, seems ridiculously backwards and foreign to me.

Let Tri-Ess members delude themselves into their perception of sexual dichotomy. However, I can see that it fits the needs of their spouses, and it is a "club" so they can decides who joins.

Personally, I could accept any straight, gay, bi, poly, person into a (hypothetical) crossdressing club.

[Phoebe Reece]

Each Tri-Ess chapter has the freedom to adopt restrictions to membership that are appropriate to location and situation. Some chapters are much more restrictive than the national organization guidelines. Other chapters that became too open sometimes run into problems that often result in the chapters disbanding. We are simply too diverse for Tri-Ess to provide effective support to every person in the transgender spectrum. It's unfortunate that this will inevitably leave some people out.

Recently the Atlanta chapter of Tri-Ess (Sigma Epsilon) brought to the national Tri-Ess organization the question regarding accepting non-heterosexual persons as full members of Tri-Ess. The reply was basically that Tri-Ess does not exclude from membership anyone who engages in the same type of crossdressing that the "typical heterosexual crossdresser" engages in. That is to say, Tri-Ess is not a place for those who spoof the opposite gender (as many drag queens do) or for those whose sole purpose in crossdressing is to attract sexual partners of the same sex.

The Atlanta chapter (Sigma Epsilon) has this year revised its policies to be more in line with the national policy on membership. We now have a membership policy in regard to sexual orientation that basically says we don't care what your sexual orientation is and do not want to know what it is. Our code of conduct covers what is expected of our membership. It is grounds for having membership cancelled if one member solicits sex from another member - regardless of whether it is for gay or heterosexual sex.

I know Deidra Cowen well and consider her my friend. Under Sigma Epsilon's current policy, Deidra would be eligible for membership if she were still interested in joining. I believe she would make a fine member of our chapter.

[gagirl1]

that's great news, Pheobe. I consider myself bicurious but would not solicit sex or do anything to disrupt the group dynamic. i believe i will check out tri-ess sometime this fall. how often do you meet?

[sterling12]

Each Tri-Ess chapter has the freedom to adopt restrictions to membership that are appropriate to location and situation. Some chapters are much more restrictive than the national organization guidelines. Other chapters that became too open sometimes run into problems that often result in the chapters disbanding. We are simply too diverse for Tri-Ess to provide effective support to every person in the transgender spectrum. It's unfortunate that this will inevitably leave some people out.

Recently the Atlanta chapter of Tri-Ess (Sigma Epsilon) brought to the national Tri-Ess organization the question regarding accepting non-heterosexual persons as full members of Tri-Ess. The reply was basically that Tri-Ess does not exclude from membership anyone who engages in the same type of crossdressing that the "typical heterosexual crossdresser" engages in. That is to say, Tri-Ess is not a place for those who spoof the opposite gender (as many drag queens do) or for those whose sole purpose in crossdressing is to attract sexual partners of the same sex.

The Atlanta chapter (Sigma Epsilon) has this year revised its policies to be more in line with the national policy on membership. We now have a membership policy in regard to sexual orientation that basically says we don't care what your sexual orientation is and do not want to know what it is. Our code of conduct covers what is expected of our membership. It is grounds for having membership cancelled if one member solicits sex from another member - regardless of whether it is for gay or heterosexual sex.

I know Deidra Cowen well and consider her my friend. Under Sigma Epsilon's current policy, Deidra would be eligible for membership if she were still interested in joining. I believe she would make a fine member of our chapter.


Bravo Phoebe! I am hopeful that people will actually read your response, and get the message!

I have stated the same thing several times in different threads and people seem to prefer to "bad mouth" Tri-ess and not listen to some NEW realities. Here in Florida, several chapters have instituted change for the last year or two. Much like Sigma Ep, we don't give a hoot what someone's sexual persuasion is. It's not our business. We only ask that members behave with decorum when representing their chapter, and understand that meetings are not for setting up dates.

Other Chapters may have other rules, but within many chapters and within The National Structure, things are changing. I wish people would hold their vitriol and give us a chance to be a source of hope for ANYONE who wants to live by a few simple guidelines for membership.

For our young lady without a lot of resources, we have addressed this problem within The Groups that I attend. If you have financial difficulties, and wish to join; we can and do set up some type of payment schedule that just about anyone can afford. $3 a month for your local dues, (in one case) seems like a sum that anyone could afford. Just give up one pack of cigarettes for the month. I am certain that National would work with anyone in the same way, to cover the cost of their National Dues.

So, for all you new potential members, we hope to be hearing from you soon. I can't see any philosophical differences that would now bar you from membership, at least not in Atlanta, nor in my chapters down here in Florida.

Anyone from any of the other chapters care to clarify the situation for your chapter?

Peace and Love, Joanie

[valenstein]

I was in Tri-Ess in Charlotte for awhile. Yes, it was primarily for hetero CD's, but we had trans girls and bi girls come as well. A few people in the club had some problems with that, but I was happy to see our club grow every month. "Does not encourage or permit alcohol"? That was never once stated to me, we always had a glass before the meeting and usually went to a bar afterwards. As long as no one was trying to "hook up" during the meetings, not much was said. Some of the TS gals did not feel comfortable being at the meeting because of a few people, so they would show up at the restaurant or bar we went to after the meeting and that was that. No problems.

[DonnaT]

my school has a LGBT club, but it is very small and i don't think it is accepting of crossdressers. lots of gay people where i live, but not nearly as many crossdressers (as far as i know).

the T stands for transgendered, and most crossdressers are transgendered, so you have every right to join, or at least see what it's all about.

[DeeInGeorgia]

As far as LGBT clubs at school, I cannot say, but at where I work, with about 5000 employees at the site, we are starting up a PRIDE Affinity group (been heck getting the bylaws approved) and of about 7 GLBTs, I am the token "T" so far, but hoping to find others. The funny thing (or nice thing) is that women that wouldn't give me the time of day as a man, are actually friendly and smile at me because I am T, (a CDer).

[Nicole1]

We are much the same in the Dallas/Ft Worth Chapter. We actually meet monthly with another group that has more gay/lesbian/ts people than crossdressers. We have several members that are bi/gay. As long as they obey the protocols and behave, we are not concerned with their "outside" activities. But we do want to provide a setting where wives of our hetero crossdressers will feel comfortable and not be concerned about what happens when they are not there. Simple cuteousness is all that is required. And I know that we would find a way to help someone out financially. All of us have been there before!. :2c:

Hugs:hugs:

Nicole