What prevents u from fully transitioning?

[nekrina]

Do u often / sometimes / or at least occasionally think and wish u could fully transition into the opposite sex.

If so. What are the major reasons that prevent u from doing it?

I just wanna know if all of the crossdressers experience this fantasies or only some of them besides the transgenders.

[Farrah]

When I was younger I would have those thoughts. Now I know I would rather be a cd.

[Kerrie Sifton]

Today I went down to our heritage day festival in drab, nice silk shirt and shorts, but when I arrived, there were moments I wish I was able to dress.
The afghan women in their purple velvet tunics, satin green pants and lovely shoes, with a chiffon scarf wrapped around their necks looked lovely as did the Indian girls in very colourful saris. Then there were the girls in pleated mini skirts boots and a loose satin top layered over the bottoms... all looking great. Yes that was one of those days.
To be a girl on a day like this would be fun.

[Shelly Preston]

Hi Merkina

Not everyone who crossdresses has a need to transition

I am sure we have all considered the possibility at some time. It is not an easy decision to transition with many difficulties to overcome. Those who do have an overwhelming need as they were born with the wrong body.

Some will live 24/7 and still not transition this could be for several reason but the main thing is being happy with yourself

I myself have no desire to transition

[KayR]

I sometimes wonder what it would be like to have the real things - breasts, and "down there", but its more idle curiosity than a desire to transition.
Other than that, I'm happy being a CD.

[vivianann]

I have not transitioned full time as a woman because I want to get my income to a healthy cashflow so I can live full time, I am not transexual and do not want the surgery, however I consider myself more female than male. I plan on living full time as a woman in the near future.

[stevie b]

Interesting one. I think about dressing full time most of the time. I sometimes wish there was something wrong with the `old man` and it could be taken away. I feel more femm than male and it's only fear stopping me dressing full time. Would I transistion, have thought about it but still trying to find out who and what I really am.
Love
Steviexx

[DanaR]

It might not be an option if you are in a long term relationship. I know my wife wouldn't be interested if I started transitioning. Sometimes life's choices are difficult.

[Jonianne]

Oh sure, thats a wonderful fantasy to think about, but for me, it just a fantasy. Most of the time I view myself as a male and happy to be. I always thought that a M to F TS was a female trapped in a male body, while a CD'er was a male who would love to be trapped in a female body (at least temporarily).

[Lidia_tv]

I do think about it, but it just costs too much. I also am careful about reactions in my environment

[Suzy Harrison]

Transitioning?

Well years ago I didn't think I'd ever want to, as I thought I'd grow out of this over time - but the opposite was true.

Then it became a dream and a fantasy ~ but because of the following, I felt I could never do it:

Partner agreeing to the change
Being able to pass in public
Having young children who deserve a father figure
Being able to carry on with your chosen employment - as you're still going to need money, male or female.

But things can and do change:

My partner now agrees as she knows I can't carry on with my 'twin life'
I can now pass in public
Children have grown up and accept the changes
My employer and work friends are supportive

Now I can't imagine not doing this.

So TIME can change EVERYTHING.
What was impossible can become very possible.

[Mollyanne]

for me, I very often daydream of transitioning, and the things that stop me are my age, my family commitments, my career commitments, not to mention the monetary factor. So this gurl has to be content with my "girl time" as is!!!! Actually it's not all that bad except for the fact I need a much"BIGGER CLOSET":D


:love: Mollyanne

[yms]

I do not think I would fully transition. I would probably start on hormones and live full-time though.

What stops me? My relationship with Lori, who is too good to put into words. I would never risk loosing what I have with her. It's too valuable.

[Karen_Ski]

What keeps me from transitioning? I sometimes ask myself that same question. I do have a little over 3 years to go at work to max out my pension however most of the people I work with know of Karen, some have seen her, and there wouldn't be an issue there. I do see the day when I live 24/7 as Karen but transitioning with hormones and the like, that is something that remains to be seen.

[Sandra]

My SO has been 24/7 for the past 3 nearly 4 years, before that it was when she got the time to dress. She has know intention on doing the hormones or surgery, why? because she is happy and content in just wearing the clothes, makeup etc. She doesn't feel the need to be a woman eg have the womans body.

[Sedona]

Sure, I guess I've thought of it from time to time, but no intentions or desires to transition. I usually take a week each year and play dress-up/make up. At the end of the week, I'm more than happy to go back to being my regular guy-self (plus the panties).

[Lara]

I have often fantasized about it. But then I realize that I have the best of both worlds to play with. I'll never be a woman no matter what I do. I try to work with what I have and change what I can.
Now if you'll excuse me I have a date with a sandblaster...:battingeyelashes:

[renee k]

I've stated in other posts I would have transitioned if it wasn't for career and family. Those two things have always been my primary concern. I'm happy where I'm at with my life. But if I could do it all over again, then yes I would.

Huggs, Renee

[RobynB]

I'm happy being a CD. No need for anything else.

[Karren H]

I prevent myself from fully transitioning... cause I don't want to be a woman....

[Sarah...]

Loving my SO and family is what stops me from going down the transitioning road. I'm not prepared to lose that.

Sarah...

[RikkiOfLA]

I went 24/7 about ten years ago when I got my first job working as an openly transgendered woman. I love living this way and couldn't imagine going back to living as a man or trying to get back into the closet.

Go further? I tried over the counter hormones for a few weeks a few years ago. I didn't like how they made me feel--I felt sick to my stomach a lot, and was beginning to lose interest in sexuality. I have no desire to get rid of my "manly bits." They do fun things and add a spicy edge to living as a woman. So I have no real interest in "going further" in my transition.

Many of the responses in this great thread are written by people who think about going further but are restrained by their inhibitions. Inhibitions are internalized fears that we learned from our parents and from society. As I came out of the closet and went full time, my inhibitions lost control of me. I became free of my fears, and began to discover how life really works. I experienced (and still experience) the exhiliration of freedom. There is nothing like it in the world! Daily life continues to be a "wow!" experience. I try to express that freedom and exhiliration in the way I dress. I like bright colors, flowing fabrics, and a bit of sexiness to communicate that freedom and excitement.

When we free ourselves from our inhibitions, they don't go away. They're still there, lurking in the shadows. I still have moments when I catch myself wondering, "Isn't somebody going to stop me from living this way?" The truth is, no one can stop me, because the only power they might have is the power I formerly chose to give them. There are still people who would try, however. When they become aware of free people like me around them, they become fearful and angry. They seek out positions of power and authority. They offer others a little freedom in exchange for fostering the myth that they invented that freedom. Since the freedom they offer is really control, I've learned that it is in fact counterfeit freedom. On a practical level, that means things like going full time is a lot easier when one is financially independent, i.e. retired. :heehee:

Another practical consideration is the fact that there are far more people in this world who are followers of various counterfeit freedoms, than those who are free. Would they want freedom if they were able to have it? I'm not sure. I don't think it really appeals to many people. There is a loneliness to freedom, in other words. So if you're going to be free, you have to be prepared to be alone until you find other free people.

When we're no longer guarded by our lnhibitions, we learn to listen very carefully to our surroundings. If we don't, the only way we learn is by trial and error, in other words, by making costly mistakes. I've made some of those! It's all part of the learning process.

Blessings,
Rikki

[_Sarah_]

What's preventing me from fully tranistioning...Well you see the thing is...

Oh wait i have already set a few wheels in motion to start transitioning :D

[Ásfríðr]

Transitioning?

Well years ago I didn't think I'd ever want to, as I thought I'd grow out of this over time - but the opposite was true.

Now I can't imagine not doing this.



i'm the same, i fell into thinking i could be 'comfortable' just as i am. now i'm thinking that i don't want to miss the opportunity whilst i'm still young, and i don't ever want to get to the point later when i cave in and regret my reluctance now. thats the thought that always wins it for me when i get scared about it, stand still in the stream and get washed into the silt or get out and walk around in the garden, pick some fruit, talk to a snake or whatever i want lol.

so whats stopping me is the time the process is going to take, which gives me ample time to put the brakes on if i have to. but my fear of not transitioning heavily outweighs my fears about doing it

but whilst i was being 'comfortable' what was stopping me was simply the idea that if i did do it i'd be chasing something i could never really have and there was no dignity in standing outside the door forever peering in at a party i wasn't formally invited to

x

[Ally K]

The thought of transitioning intrigues me very much.. To be honest, I'd love to live full time as a woman. That would be amazing!

But my reality is, I have dreams and goals that wouldn't allow me to do that. Plus, I have a very serious girlfriend whom I love very much (and she will soon be my wife.. I've already got the engagement ring!). She puts up with the dressing, but I'm sure she would leave me if I went further and I wouldn't blame her. She signed up to be with a man, not a man who is turning into a woman.

So, no transitioning for this girl... I'll just stick to cd'ing.

xoxo
Ally

[KayR]

I suppose the answer may lie in the way we regard just what we do and any progress made. Most of us believe that we are on a journey. For me, my journey is towards perfecting my appearance - clothes, wig, makeup etc. I recognise that this is a superficial journey, but I dont know what else I will want to do after it. For others, it would seem that their journey is more specifically towards a more radical change - that of male to female on a permanent basis, either with or without surgery or drugs.
Perhaps, as in our careers and life plans we simply need to get to the destination in order to find out - call it kismet.

[Veronica 1]

If I had the money I would probably do it. I would love to be able to live and feel as a woman but at my age it probably will not happen.

[Amanda Shaft]

There's a saying: life's what happens whilst you're making other plans!
If things had been differant then maybe I might have, I know it makes me sad to think about what might have been so I try to accept what is. I think I need to think about this some more.
Amanda

[Dorothy]

The fact that I am a CD and not a transexual.

[JoannaCDSexy]

I've thought about it but i would never fully transform. There's too many risks. I would most likely lose my family and girlfriend whom i love very much. Im very happy being a CD.

[PaulaPts]

I think of it every day. I often wish I started years ago as it would be all over now. The hardest thing for me is finding a way to keep my career going. A girl has to make a living!

[angelfire]

I prevent myself from fully transitioning... cause I don't want to be a woman....

Pretty much the same thing here.

[PhillyGuy2Girl]

The only way I would do a full transition is that if I could go back to guy mode when I want or need to,plus I also love being a guy.But I know that can't be done, so I'm happy to be just a crossdresser.

Felicity :)

[Sara Jessica]

I would if I could but I can't so I won't!

Why?

The usual suspects, family + career = responsibility. My adoration of my wife & kids trumps my need to transition so I muddle through things the best I can.

I cannot help but think that had I known in my college days what I know now, I'd have transitioned back then. At that time, the only resource I had was the college library where all of the text on tg issues was highly clinical in nature. I was alone and the available information did nothing for me.

But...had I done so, I wouldn't have my wonderful family today so this is not to say I wish things would have played out for me to transition way back when. My life is what it is, all I can do is try to find balance and support.

[Babette]

Transitioning? No thank you because then I would miss out on the fun and excitement of crossdressing.

Babette

[AmandaM]

I would like to try. But, it's so hard now. Family, career, friends, mortgage. Geez, if I wasn't such a chicken when I was younger. I've always felt that transition is probably the best course. While attempting transition, I may have decided that I didn't want to go all the way, but I regret not trying.

[Claire3]

Just happy as i am.The best of both worlds

[Beth-Lock]

In my personal case, I ran into a lot of problems at the CD'ing in public stage, including bullying and even feared for my life. Due to my personal living arrangements, I can't simply walk away from it all.
Now the issue is that I do not seem to be able to pass well enough to make transitioning feasible anyway. Some posts here from the CD's not interested in transitioning, have tried to devalue our concerns with not passing, but in fact, it is a major worry for those wishing, at some level, to transition. Would I be afraid to go out, except in the evening, and little at all in summer, when my masculine origins would not be as noticeable, if I transitioned? That would not be much of a life.

[CharleneT]

Oddly... if I could I would dress every day**, but I have no interest in transitioning. I like the combo as it is. I have had day dreams about it, but they are just little fantasies.

Charlene

** especially if society would just accept me as is... but they won't :( arrrgggg...

[GailTulane]

Ah, Ladies. Ah, Ladies.
I would transition in a minute.
Nothing holds me back (OK, money, a bit ;-0) except my obligations to people that I love.
I long to be the person that I am, and to love as and be loved as the person that I am.
I am just trying to set up the people that I love in a responsible fashion, and then go fulltime and wherever that leads. Because I embarked on a life and career before I truly understood who I am, despite my deepest longings, my moral compass will not allow me to exit one life and begin another without taking proper care of my family and co-workers. That being said, I am working aggressively to achieve my goal.
Never am I happier, or more content than when I express myself as a woman, and I hope in the not-too-distant future to have a chance to do so, all day, every day, for the rest of my life.

[KimberlyS]

I would only want to transition for a few hours, the night, a few days or a week. Then transition back. So far they only seem to be able to do that in the movies. It would just be nice to have a more feminine body at times mostly when getting some more or full femme time. Otherwise I basically like who I am.

[Marvina Martian]

Nothing is standing in my way any longer....So you know what that means gurls? Yep, I'm starting on my path. Wish me luck gurls ;)

[carolinoakland]

Well, for me what kept me from doing it was my own fear. And that fear was based on the limited info I had that let me believe that I would never be happy. But that's the fault of the popular media, and I bought right into it. I'm realizing that I've lived this male life in an effort to distract myself from accepting my feelings. Once I got to place's like this, and got out into the real world of Trans, and not the fetish side of it, I learned that there are many Transwomen who lead happy, productive lives, mostly becasue they are now in the right body for them. I have a lot of work to do to overcome the life time of deluding myself about my gender identity. It's not easy, but like one of the other posters said, I'm at the point that my fear of transitioning is being supplanted with the fear of a life not transitioning.

[Jessica212]

I contemplate transitioning all the time. A huge part of me wants to, but another part of me feels it would be better to hold back and remain a man, just one who dresses up as a woman often.

I'd love to live full-time as a woman. I'd love to be one of the girls, to be able to go anywhere as a female and not be hiding anything (or just go somewhere as a female for that matter - I've never left the house dressed even), and most importantly, to have the body of a female.

That said, I have a billion obstacles in my way. I have a girlfriend, career aspirations, a complete lack of any money whatsoever, a family who wouldn't accept me as a female (much less as a CDer), etc. It's just not feasible at this point in time, nor will it be feasible for many years to come.

If I had zero constraints on me, I seriously might transition, and I would want to start it soon, because I would love to be a woman while still in my 20s (I'm 19 right now). But that certainly won't happen.

It's something I think about all the time, and generally something that I seriously contemplate every single time I dress. But I know it's not happening, whether I want it to or not.

[nekrina]

What's preventing me from fully tranistioning...Well you see the thing is...

Oh wait i have already set a few wheels in motion to start transitioning :D

WOW.. I wish that:daydreaming:

How do u do that at 18 y. Did u convince your parents to finance u or do u already have a job?

[kateyliz]

I think about it often, but beeing husband, dad, and grandpa are too important to me. Hugs, Kathy

[Joy Carter]

Ive always wanted to be female. But I never knew it was possable, when I grew up in the fifties and sixties. I now know I'll never be able to transition. With a loving spouse and two adult children, it just won't happen. I CD just because I know what I want, and know that I'll never be.

[Jessica212]

What's preventing me from fully tranistioning...Well you see the thing is...

Oh wait i have already set a few wheels in motion to start transitioning :D


I won't lie, I'm completely jealous! I really haven't heard of many people my age starting to transition.

[TGMarla]

Do u often / sometimes / or at least occasionally think and wish u could fully transition into the opposite sex.

If so. What are the major reasons that prevent u from doing it?
Well, there's the little fact that as much as I like "being" a woman, I'm not a transexual......

[nekrina]

Well, there's the little fact that as much as I like "being" a woman, I'm not a transexual......

Well yeah that's correct for some.

But isn't it already worth transitioning just for the sake of having peace from the constant urge to CD?

[Shannen]

because I don't want to

[tricia_uktv]

I may, I've not ruled anything out. But I'm not ready yet. Its as simple as that. I am not unhappy in my male self so that makes it a real tricky decision.

[Phyliss]

Having done a little bit of research, I find that, after all the "shrink" sessions, the cost of a complete new wardrobe, surgery and everything else involved it works out at around $75 K or so. Almost the cost of a luxury car.
I could afford the "cost" BUT do I want to "pay the price" ???
Loss of family, friends, job, having to move someplace else where nobody knows you and start all over.
Besides that The one lingering question remains for me, "What if I change my mind later?" Can't sew it back on.

[Butterfly Bill]

I like being able to pee standing up.

[PrettyGiGi]

I knew at age 9 I wanted to be a girl. I remember painting my nails at age 4. But I never did anything about it and am entrenched in the life I have, with children I could never face. So it is what it is. But it is getting harder and harder!

[CharleneT]

For those who are considering a full transition. I would encourage you to find a post-op TS and talk to them at length about their experiences. I'm lucky, I have such a person as a close friend. She even gives talks to groups and classes, it can be very enlightening to hear their stories and be able to ask direct questions.

C.

[rickie121x]

One of the things that made me sure about not wanting to transition is that scene, many years ago, in a restroom when I ran into an old CD-ing friend.

(S)He was so excited about the results of his recent genital surgery that he just dropped his panties and displayed - without even asking if I wanted to see.... I was revolted at what was a distasteful sight. I turned away, almost instantly and asked him to stop.

What I know about that is I do not want to have anything to do with transitioning. ...just some dynamic inner instinct, I guess. I cannot explain it. It's just that way. What is unusual, is that my feeling about transitioning is very similar to what I imagine is going on the minds of "redneck" types who have really strong reactions to our crossdressing.

Rickie

[DeeDeeB]

I'll pass on that one...I'm not in the wrong body, just the wrong clothes. :D

Dee :fairy1:

[suzy cool]

I'm a crossdresser not a transexual. I have no desire to transition.

[PaulaPts]

I think about a full transition (srs) every day. I just haven't found a way to preserve my career and income while doing it. I hope one day soon to find a solution.

[Jennifer Marie P.]

I'm thinking about the transition but right now I'm happy the way I am

[Mary Lee]

Well back in the olden days, 60s, women were not treated so well in the job market. They usually made low income or they married and had a husband support them. If discrimation exists now imagine what it was like then.
I did not want to live a poor life. I dream alot about SRS but I am somewhat happy with the way things are.

[Katrina]

The SO, career, family, and friends all are preventing me from transitioning. Those and FEAR!


Nothing is standing in my way any longer....So you know what that means gurls? Yep, I'm starting on my path. Wish me luck gurls ;)

OMG Bre, congrats!

[Phoebe Reece]

If someone feels that they really must function sexually as a female, than a full transition makes sense. Otherwise, I just don't get it. One can live full time as a woman without any surgery. In any case I'm not interested and transition is not for me.

[TSchapes]

Q: What's the difference between a crossdresser and a transsexual?

A: 2 years

No, not for me. At 6'4" I already stick out as a man, it would be worse as a woman. Even though I enjoy women's clothes, I don't think I would enjoy the glass ceiling and all the other things women have to put up with. You take a chance with breast cancer with hormones. There are too many things to give up and no guarantees.

Bre and others, I wish you all the best. I know you have a rough road ahead, I am amazed at your resolve and your abilities to follow that path.

Please take care, love Tracy :love:

[Emily Anderson]

I NEVER think of fully transitioning. I'm happy with who I am, and understand that crossdressing is just a part of my life... No need to push it further than it needs to go to live a fulfilling life.

[Donnadcd]

for me, I very often daydream of transitioning, and the things that stop me are my age, my family commitments, my career commitments, not to mention the monetary factor. So this gurl has to be content with my "girl time" as is!!!! Actually it's not all that bad except for the fact I need a much"BIGGER CLOSET":D


:love: Mollyanne

I'm in the same boat as you. I just wish I could clear those hurdles and just do it. Being in the closet with the wife is probably the biggest one - considering how badly I'd like to transistion. "Would've, could've, should've" - is the story of my life

[jennifer24]

I knew at an early age that I wanted to be female. Right now what`s holding me back is my job, and hurting family, maybe when I retire I can go all the way, always felt female inside and want to transision sometime, that1s what will make me happy & complete:) JENN

[Valeria]

I contemplate transitioning all the time. A huge part of me wants to, but another part of me feels it would be better to hold back and remain a man, just one who dresses up as a woman often.

If I had zero constraints on me, I seriously might transition, and I would want to start it soon, because I would love to be a woman while still in my 20s (I'm 19 right now). But that certainly won't happen.

It's something I think about all the time, and generally something that I seriously contemplate every single time I dress. But I know it's not happening, whether I want it to or not.
Surgery is expensive (though no more than a compact car, if all you need is SRS). But that can come later, if necessary.

In the meantime, the sooner you start HRT the better. You are still young enough that your skull is still masculinizing and your facial hair is still coming in. Starting an anti-androgen will stop all that. Also, as far as feminization and breast development goes, the sooner you start estrogen, the better.

Anyway, I'm afraid that the result of not transitioning now will just be a more painful (for everyone) transition 10 or 15 years from now.


I won't lie, I'm completely jealous! I really haven't heard of many people my age starting to transition.
I know dozens and dozens of girls your age or younger who have started transition. I also know of a forum for younger transitioners. PM me if you are interested.

[Caitlintgsd]

What's stopping me?

Death.

Yup. That's really about the only minor detail in my life that stops me from transitioning.

I can deal with my wife's divorcing me. I mean, really, I'm bringing up the thing that is the most wanted thing in my life here. I mean transitioning. I can perhaps find true love again.

This isn't something that I take as "sleigh of hand".

I've tried. Really, I have.

I have doctors' that refuse to talk to me because I've bugged the shit out of them. I've truly expended a serious amount of time with this.

Ok, yea, I can do the spiro thing.

Fine.

Christ, I'll be a hundred and twenty before enough of my estrogen challenged body catches up to itself on some kind of bell curve.

No hrt for me...Thanks. Want to but can't.

It's not a matter of lack of desire. I'm old enough and smart enough to not want to off myself over the pain that this tad little bit of thought has brought into my life. Maybe someday I'll be old enough to not cry over it as well. It's always good to look on the bright side of things as well (as per the last 2 head shrinks I've seen).

Please don't ask me if I'm at peace. I've been known to get ugly, and on a few occasions violent, on that point.

Sorry, my apologies, but this post really hits an aspect of my life that I constantly have to bury.

Over and over and over.

I'm crying. Why the hell I just posted this response on the internet escapes me. Maybe to let others in a similar situation know that they're not alone.

There are times when I think, buy the damn things off of the web. Heck, I can shove a syringe and needle full of Estrogen into my leg. I've done it a lot of times before. Yea, I could do that. I'd welcome that. it's like...

Freedom.
Freedom from those gawd-awful situations and those damn things that happen in the middle of the night. It's gross. It's horrible. Why doesn't that stop after age 21? Or 30? Ok, 40?

I could do "phytoestrogens" again. I lost my driver's license for 3 months after ending up in the emergency room, after twitching on the floor in a Barnes & Nobles, in the throngs of a huge seizure.

Yea, I can wipe my sniveling nose and pretend that life is grand and that I can do whatever I want.

No...I can't.

It really, truly, doesn't matter to me. I would rather die trying to transition then to be what, or whom, I am now. I really would.

But I have 2 great kids. One is eighteen and knows all about me. We went to Pride a couple of weeks ago.The other is twelve and I know she's thinking I'm a little bit deranged.

That's ok. I have a kid who thinks I'm a little weird. We can always converse another day.

I don't have a kid who misses me.

That is what prevents me from transitioning. Yes, it's tough, and some days I cry all day long. I just have this feeling that, even on my worst days, they'd feel worse than I do, if I attempted it again.

[Delila]

That is a good question. I think that I really have 2 large things that keep me from full transition. My wife has clearly stated that as she is not a lesbian if I decided to go fully femme she would have no choice but to leave. The second reason is really that I just don't have the build. I have wide shoulders and am too tall to appear truly female and honestly as much as I dislike certain parts of my body I would not be able to handle being built like a man with female parts some things just can't be changed with surgery.

[KateSpade83]

The only way I'd transition is if God changed me by a miracle into a real woman with periods and childbirth. I asked God at Lourdes to change me and his miracle workers laughed at me! [They read my mind!]

No surguries can make me a real woman! So I don't do it!

[Deborah Jane]

I,m awkward and confused, even on my "good" days....
If i transitioned, i,d probably start dressing as a guy and want to transition back again :doh:

I,m saving myself the bother!!!

[valenstein]

Most TS' I know feel they were in the wrong body. I'm fine being male, but I sometimes think I got the wrong brain.

[rebekahm]

I think the biggest fear I have is being alone. I have discussed this in depth with my therapist and of course it is rooted in other issues which have nothing to do with being T. I managed my career to the point where I am self-employed (albeit just starting out) and put enough cash away to pay for most surgical procedures needed. So, it is really an issue of getting over the fear of the unknown (being alone after transitioning) and facing that with eyes wide open.

[linnea]

I have often thought about the possibility of having a sexual re-orientation, as it's often called. I am still thinking about it, and during the time I recently had to present myself en femme, I thought about it even more.
Family, job, social conventions--all have been factors in my choice to remain male. The monetary costs are not small either.
One might ask or say, "Then you don't REALLY want to change." However, I would respond that, as with other choices in my life, this one would not be made in a vacuum. Many choices individuals make have effects on other people; individuals don't necessarily bear the burden of responsibility for other persons' response to the choices, but still those others may bear some of the consequences. For example, I have sometimes thought that it would be a great to live in a true wilderness. I have never done it long-term though that is what I said I wanted. However, my three children would not have had many very important educational and social experiences (ones that I had that led me to the wilderness idea) if they had been reared in the wilderness. I had to weigh one value against another, one desire against another.
my career is almost over; my children are grown and on their own. Perhaps now is the time. It's still a hard decision.

[Carroll]

Though my wife has joked around with me having real boobs, the fact remains that she married a man who happens to enjoy dressing like a woman and I happen to be a man that likes, well, being a man at times.

[CD Susan]

If I had been born 40 years later than I had been and had the finances I would have done it. I am 60 years old and think that it is too late in my life to consider this. Besides I now have acceppted being a cd and it is a life I enjoy. I easily cope with both of the people that live in my head.

[Beth-Lock]

When I think of transition, I would mean living as a woman full time, with a female identity, but not very likely having the (SRS) surgery. (I hate surgery, especially major surgery for one thing, and indeed find it scary.)

[Sandra Dunn]

I do think about often, what keeps me from it is the life I have built with my wife. Our past, present and future that we've built with each other at this time and the respect for her keeps Sandra in check. If and I'm not wanting anything to happen to her does happen to her then I will be looking seriously into the SRS, however I'm not sure I would do the total change. The removal of certian parts and the development of certian upper parts would probably be the extent of my SRS.

[curse within]

My family and friends keep me tied up as a male.

[lisa_vin]

There was a very recent movie that starred Michelle Pfeiffer as one of three sisters who are all witches. In the movie, she is able to completely transform a male farmhand into a beautiful girl in the blink of an eye by magic to aid her in a quest for a fallen star. The ability to immediately transform my body and clothes to female but stay who I am mentally and then immediately transform back to male would be so cool just so I could experience real female feelings with all real female parts. It's always been a tremendous curiosity of mine to experience life as a female so I could compare with my experiences of the same things as male. Fantasy is as close as I'll ever get.

[Jamie14]

I bet everybody's tought of it before. On the one hand, it would be fun. On the other, it would be expensive and make relationships with friends and family more difficult.....Jamie

[Robin Tree]

If I was 25 years younger and had the money at the time I would have fully transitioned. But now at 47, and my career that I have working in a school district. I can't see that happening for myself now.

[MarieTS]

Definitely. The big show stoppers are family, career/money.

[Valeria]

The only way I'd transition is if God changed me by a miracle into a real woman with periods and childbirth.

No surguries can make me a real woman! So I don't do it!
Being a "real woman" is more than having periods and childbirth, but thanks for perpetuating the ancient view of women as creatures born to bleed and breed.

In any case, you are right that no surgery can make someone a woman (or truly female) if they aren't already one. However, for those of us who were born female, but with birth anatomy that was not congruent with our gender, surgery can be very helpful in setting things right.

FWIW, for those who cite career/money concerns as a reason to not transition, I walked away from a successful career when I went full time. I went back to college and started over in a completely new field. I don't regret it in the least. It's true, money can't buy happiness. I'd have a lot more money right now if I hadn't transitioned completely, but I'd be a lot less happy and fulfilled. If you are truly TS and you are letting ties to your existing career hold you back, I suspect you are making a huge mistake.

[Kimmie]

Not being able to have kids, and be called daddy. That is # 1 on the list.

[emmicd]

I am realistic in separating crossdressing from internal desire. I love to crossdress and I do wish I was born a girl.

With that said I also know I am a male and I am blessed to have a wife and son I love very much.

Years before I got married I thought I would seek the full transition including SRS but I was afraid to start on the hormones because of the bodily changes. I welcomed the thought of becoming more feminine in apparence and developing breasts but I just got overwhelmed with fear and was not sure how to survive with transition. I even spoke to medical doctors about the Harry Benjamin standards of care and the whole transition process and what it meant to be a transgendered person. I also always wanted to have a kid and knew if I transitioned this would not be possible. And also what would happen if I was not accepted?

I have come to the reality that although I consider myself a lifelong crossdresser and a transgendered M-F individual I will never transition. I do not wish to lose all that I have worked so hard for. I can still wear my dresses but in secret. This is the hardest part for a closet crossdresser but i am so used to it. I need my family and I love my wife and son too much!

emmi

[Christina2008]

Family, friends and Job.
I’m not sure I would want to fully transition, but I would like a few things. To be free to permanently have higher highbrows, real long hair, finger nails and a more feminine figure would be great.

It’s a great fantasy :o

[Selene]

Friends and family are the biggest part, money plays into it a bit though since none of it is cheap.

[Naima]

Been 24/7 for 2 yrs and not going to transition cuz I'd miss the "thump" sound whenever I'm jumping up and down! =P

[Mariah]

For me, It is coming down to Money. I'm broke, I've been 40% of the required steps (up to waiting on HRT) Living 80% of my live at a woman. but I don't have the money to buy anything, med, docs, and the surgical stuff. I so wish I had the money.



Mariah

[Mary Morgan]

I often think that I would have transitioned if I had known what the possibilities were as a youngster. Of course, from my vantage point, the possibilities have changed dramatically in the last 10-20 years. I am so happy for the younger TGs among us, as they are living at a time of greater understanding and opportunity. At 6o years of age, I have a lot of baggage, most quite good, some not so. There are so many others that my transitioning would affect that I will not consider it now, not to mention the missed opportunity to avoid all the affects of that evil testosterone. I have had a good life inspite of my deepest darkest desire and I am grateful for that. If by some chance I have to do another lap on planet Earth, I hope the next time I can spend it as the woman I believe I was meant to be.

[Joni T]

Mainly my wife is what keeps me from transitioning. I'd be hard-presssed to replace her. She likes just about everything I do and puts up with my dressing so I've got too much to lose. Now if something were to happen to her and I suddenly found myself single again (happily married now 22 years), that would be another story. Besides, as she once said to a (knowing) friend, "Where else can I get boyfriend, girlfriend, husband and lover all in the same package?"
Joni

[Tina B.]

But some Gurls just want to have fun!! Some days I feel like a girl, some days I don't.
Tina B.

[Pattie O]

I'd love to .I think it would be wonderful to become a woman but I know that I never will because of family and friends.They mean too much to me and I know that the rejection would be far too severe for me to handle.:battingeyelashes:

maybe in my next life??
Pattie O

[JennyCD4U]

To be honest, I wish I was born a girl. Theres a variety of reasons why, but I'll keep thsoe to myself unless people really want to know.

Theres a couple things that keep me from fully transforming. First, I'm scared to death by surgery. Second is that although my family may tollerate it, I know they would be slightly dissapointed and I wouldnt want to do that.

[diane1a]

Hi,

What is slowing me down is income. Since the foreclosure, I had little income to continue. I am restarting, I found a way to get a job as a woman, and this would allow me to live as I wish with the clothes and social relationships I would like.

Diana

[Samantha43]

I would never transition. I like being a man. I just have a girlie side that needs to be expressed occasionally.

[Maria2222]

Fantasy is one thing, and I do enjoy the fantasy frequently.
Reality is another thing and the reality is I like being a guy too much to go 100% the other way. Plus, and this should have come first, I love my wife very much and want to be with her for the rest of my wife. She would never be able to accept me transitioning and I don't blame her. Fortunately, I don't have to make a choice.
I love my dress up sessions and doing some (well, maybe quite a bit) real time feminizing of myself, and the rest of the time I'm content to be a guy.

[victoriamwilliams1]

The only thing I have wanted to do is spend 1-2 weeks dressed without any male clothes.

[Echo Logical]

A year ago I would have said that I was happy just being a CD. Now I am not so sure. Lately I have been wondering what it would be like to go on hormones, get breast implants, live full time as a woman etc. I don't think I would ever go full SRS though. So what stops me, like most others, family especially my wife, everyone else would just have to deal with it. I won't be in a place to make any kind of decision for another 5 years anyway.

Another thing that stops me. For years my wife has wanted to get breast implants, and she would kick my butt if I got them before she did :D

[keeganmeuer]

When I was younger I considered fully transitioning when I got older but those kind of thoughts didn't last very long. I'm happy being a male with the freedom to dress up whenever I get the urge. Anything permanent would probably create more problems than good in the long run, at least for me.

[Chrissy8888]

I would love to transition fully but it is mostly a matter of money. First off just seeing the Psychologist/Psychiatrist is outrageous. Then I would have to quit my job for the RLT something about the line of work that I am in. Then the cost of surgery. I dream of winning the lotto and then going forward with it. I am totally in love with the idea of being a woman. Parts of it do scare me though I will admit that. I know that being a woman and being accepted are much harder than being a man. But to me it is all worth it. Maybe someday but I am sure I will be to old to really enjoy it.

[Amy07]

I just like being me.
Dressed or not, feeling like I want to feel, when I want to.
I don't want to transition. But, if you want to, more power to you.