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kimberly ann487
08-06-2008, 02:36 PM
I am wondering if anyone has ever been read while in drab. I enjoy browsing the womens departments in drab, I've never been out enfemme. I just say I'm looking for gift ideas. Well, I pass this little consignment shop all the time so today I went in. The very nice, and hot I should add, sales girl asked if she could help. Now as if I had a sign on my forehead she said to feel free to try on anything I liked, and she would bring back to the fitting room anything I picked out. This she did and I had a wonderful time. Sadly there was nothing that worked. :sad::sad: My new friend Ellen made me promise to come back in September when new fall items are coming in, I can't wait.:) She also showed me a couple of snapshots of a customer, like me, modeling her purchaces. Ellen made me feel right at home. Has this happened to anyone else ?
KIM:love::love:

BethCD
08-06-2008, 02:45 PM
Kimberly, Hasn't happened here, but your experience gives us hope.
I'm getting braver in my drab shopping, but still have a way to go.
Congratulations on a great find !!:D

Beth

KandisTX
08-06-2008, 02:50 PM
Some GG's have CDar, just as much as they have Gaydar. They can tell just by the way we act and react to items. If we are looking quite intently they can tell if we are looking for something for ourselves or for someone else. Take it in stride and by all means go back there again ;) She is definitely a friend to keep in touch with.

Kandis:love::rose2:

Bev06 GG
08-06-2008, 02:53 PM
Hi Kimberley
I think sales assistants are becoming more socially aware now. Certainly in one of the Department stores in our town they are more than helpful with the guys when they are looking at makeup and perfume etc. and I dont think its just because they think its for the MRs. I think Kandis has a point, my SO has been spotted on a couple of occassions whilst in drab. I think CDs tend to take more care of their appearance in general whether drab or drag. Eye Brows, nails etc. We still have a way to go but isn't it heartening to hear stories like yours Kimberley.
Take care
bev

Jamie14
08-06-2008, 03:11 PM
I've had similar experiences. I think the sales girls are just more savy today and realize we are there to shop and can help their bottom line. Most guys don't go out clothes shopping for their SO's or mom's (like we sometimes claim)

I think they notice the attention I pay to the items on the rack and that I'm not just browsing through women's clothes for he heck of it. Now you've got a great contact- a definite plus.................Jamie

Katrina
08-06-2008, 04:41 PM
I think the sales associates know. I shop like a woman...touching the fabrics, etc. Guys generally (generally!) flip through the hangers until they find their size without "experiencing" the act of shopping. Be one with the clothes.

Lidia_tv
08-06-2008, 04:43 PM
I've been given some strange looks while windowshopping in front of shops with women's clothes. Read? Don't really know, as for SAs I just don't care anymore

tricia_uktv
08-06-2008, 04:57 PM
Kimberly, relax, it isn't a problem. Be open with yourself and you will be fine. Ellen sounds good fun so use her - and I don't believe nothing worked. Hugs, have fun, its there for you

Kimberely416
08-06-2008, 05:11 PM
I guess we're fortunate, here in Edmonton, to have a conseignment shop named Caprice that caters to CD's. As a matter of fact, the owner has a special evening for us twice a year with wine and cheese and extra staff to help.

I have been in a couple of times in drab. The red carpet is always rolled out for me. She sees me coming and calls for the Brinks truck!!!! LOL As a matter of fact, the gown that had to be altered was purchased there. I posted a picture recently.

Maria2222
08-06-2008, 05:34 PM
How wonderful for you.
:thumbsup::thumbsup:

Toni_Lynn
08-06-2008, 05:38 PM
Well ... not really .. but when I started letting my hair grow out my mum told me (as an insult) .. "get a haircut, you look like a f***king dyke"

Does that count? :doh:

Huggles

Toni-Lynn

Angie G
08-06-2008, 08:01 PM
I wish hun. :hugs:
Angie

Jodi
08-06-2008, 08:30 PM
As one who has worked the floor as an SA at both New york & Co and The Limited, I can give some insight. Experienced SA's are trained and know how to spot different kinds of body language in customers. As an SA, I can say with 99.9% certainty, that I could spot any guy in the store who was shopping for himself. You might fool an 18 yr old SA who is new on the job, but you don't fool an experienced SA. Your body language does not lie.

So--you can make up any excuse you want as to why you are shopping, but the experienced SA knows it is for you. We had guys come into the store shopping, and they would give us some great stories as to why they were shopping. You can do this if it makes you feel better, but you are not fooling anyone, but are actually looking a little foolish in the eyes of the SA's. When the guy would leave, the female SA's would come over to me and ask, "why didn't that guy just come out and say he was shopping for himself."

You are best advised to be confident and honest with the SA. It will allow her to do her job.

Now get out there and shop

Jodi

KarenCDFL
08-06-2008, 08:47 PM
As a matter of fact, yes!

The oddest thing that was said to me by an ex-gf was that I made love like a girl! But she had no complaints :D Seems after a few rough ex bf's she loved the gentle touch.

Emma England
08-07-2008, 05:05 AM
When the guy would leave, the female SA's would come over to me and ask, "why didn't that guy just come out and say he was shopping for himself."

You are best advised to be confident and honest with the SA. It will allow her to do her job.

Now get out there and shop

Jodi

I guess because those who feel ashamed, think that the sa will not help them or secretly laugh behind their backs.

Would someone such as yourself actually offer help in assisting potential customers? By this I mean that some are only interested in selling. Others are genuinely interested in making sure that you buy what is suitable for you.

The best advice is the right types of clothes that compliment each other (rather than always saying yes just to get a sale).

susie d
08-07-2008, 09:19 AM
I have been read at Goodwill stores a few times and just recently heard an interesting comment. I am usually nervous at first, but when I start looking I just get into it and don't worry. I will say though that I always do my shopping in drab.

I got to the store early enough that I didn't think many people would be there, wrong! A group of 3 women were shopping nearby as I was looking at blouses and heard one say to the other "I guess it doesn't matter any more which side the buttons are on". I just snikered to myself and kept on shopping.

Another time an older SA at Goodwill told me to let her know if I wanted to try on any of the formal dresses I was looking at. I did end up buying a huge petticoat, have you ever tried to conceal one of these on your way to checkout? Impossible! Same older SA said she sure would like to be there when I tried that on so I gave her a big smile as I was leaving. I have never had a bad comment at these stores and I think I know where just about every one is wherever I go.

Tina B.
08-07-2008, 09:33 AM
I never tell why I am shopping, I just go in and find what I want, but I have been told by sales persons, that I have good taste, and my wife is a very luck lady to have me for a husband and giver of great gifts, I just smile and say I do my best! Was I read, I don't know and reall dont care. Was I laughted at behind my back, don't know and don't care. Did i get treated like a good customer with money to spend, darn right I was.
An old crossdresser once told me to just go in like you belong there, and you will be treated that way, and she was right!
i once found a great sale on shoes, I bought five pair, the young girl that rang it up said that's a lot of shoes, my reply, I love a good sale!
we where both happy, and maybe she had a great story to tell her friends about the guy that bought all those lady shoes!
Tina B.

KateSpade83
08-07-2008, 10:24 AM
When I went to a consigment shop here in Houston the SA pointed me out to the size 14+ sizes, - like as if that was my size! I'm a size 4 to 6.... I get read as a cd shopping for myself a lot in guy mode...

CharleneT
08-07-2008, 11:23 AM
I guess we're fortunate, here in Edmonton, to have a conseignment shop named Caprice that caters to CD's. As a matter of fact, the owner has a special evening for us twice a year with wine and cheese and extra staff to help.

I have been in a couple of times in drab. The red carpet is always rolled out for me. She sees me coming and calls for the Brinks truck!!!! LOL As a matter of fact, the gown that had to be altered was purchased there. I posted a picture recently.

MORE stores should think this way, after all, CD's are a potential gold mine ! We often buy more clothes than a GG might, AND we have to buy men's as well.... many potential sales there for sure !

C.

pamela_a
08-07-2008, 12:16 PM
AND we have to buy men's as well....Who says we have to buy those too?? I won't and you can't make me.

Have I been read shopping? I'm sure of it. I learned that they can't help you if they don't know it's for you. I've also gotten to the point where I really don't care what the SA thinks or says when I'm gone, as long as I'm treated as any other customer I'm perfectly happy. It also adds to the shopping experience, being able to openly and honestly talk with the SAs about what does and doesn't work for you.

-Paula-

Deelite
08-07-2008, 12:53 PM
Yup, got read, a few months back buying some very nice platform wedge sandals, i put them on the counter to pay for them and the lovely Sales Girl said "you will look lovely in those!!"

If going girly shopping was'nt a buzz enough, to have such a positive comment like that makes it all the more special.

Dawn D.
08-07-2008, 01:07 PM
Yup! I got asked once if I was ready for a room while shopping at the Avenue and my wife was already in a fitting room at the time. It was the same SA that helped her out. I was still looking for things while waiting for her. I politely declined. Oh how I wished their clothes would fit me, I really wanted to take her up on the offer!



Dawn

Katrina
08-07-2008, 03:33 PM
...An old crossdresser once told me to just go in like you belong there, and you will be treated that way, and she was right!...

There is something to be said for that statement. I haven't had a single problem either in drab or enfemme since I go in to a store looking like I belong there. On the same token, when you ask for a dressing room, don't ask, "May I try this on?". Instead ask, "Where may I try this on?". It implies that you know you have the right to try something on and puts the question of where (especially if it is a woman's only changing room) they will accommodate your needs.

karezza
08-07-2008, 04:28 PM
I think most of us go through stages in our comfort level with shopping. At first I was very nervous and pretended I was buying for my wife. When I realized how obvious I was holding garments up to myself to check for size, or sneeking women's clothes into the men's dressing room, I stopped the pretense, but didn't openly acknowledge what I was doing, leaving it as "don't-ask-don't tell" with the SAs. With more experience I became more comfortable. When I got the nerve up to actually ask for assistance, I was put at ease and the anxiety just fell away.

Part of this is embarrassment or shame about being a CD. When that leaves, everything is much easier. Now I am kind of proud of it and I just ask for whatever assistance I need. Yesterday I was trying on some platform heels at Mervyn's and a woman nearby said, "I really like your shoes." I was flattered and said, "Thank you!".

The more open we are, the more we are accepted. The truth is we give SAs something to talk about and we just might bring some fun to an otherwise boring day. When I'm open with them about being a CD, they are amazingly friendly and helpful.

Karezza

Karren H
08-07-2008, 04:56 PM
I assume that every sales associate that see's me going in and trying on dresses can do the math!! lol

TommiTN
08-07-2008, 05:36 PM
Hell, I was read over the phone today! I had ordered a new wig on line and evidently had forgotten to specify the color. A few minutes after I placed the order the phone rings and some guy with a middle eastern accent is on the other end wanting to know what color I wanted. I live alone, so there was no possibity of an SO answering for me. Busted!

CD Susan
08-07-2008, 07:26 PM
I suppose I have been read hundreds of times by sa's in my 40 plus years of shopping for womens clothes. Once while at a thrift shop an elderly sa approached me and proceeded to tell me that I was in the womens section and their were no mens clothes where I was looking. I smiled and told her I was shopping for womens clothes. She had a surpised look on her face and left me alone. When I checked out she asked if I found what I was looking for. I thanked her for asking and she seemed relieved that I was not bothered by her trying to direct me to the 'proper' section of the store. I think this was her first interaction with a cd. I have had many positive experiences while shopping for womens clothes.