Do You Mind Being Called a ...???

[deja true]

New girl PhoebeGB and Kehleyr (who we've missed for a while, I think) both said something in another thread that got me thinking....

Phoebe's signature says "you CAN call me Babe!". And Kehlyr posted that many TS women do not like be referred to as a "gurl" because they are "girls".

So...two different questions for Cds and for trans-women...

In conversation, do you mind being called "sweetie" or "darlin'" or "Honey" or "babygirl" or "Babe" or any other of those little personal endearments that many of us (including myself) use?

and...maybe a little more seriously...

Do you mind being referred to as a "gurl" in any situation?

[Karren H]

I absolutly hate being called a gurl!! Just sounds demeaning to me... Anything else is fine... Being called Karren is perferable.. :)

[paula jessica rains]

i don't mind but i like being called a woman insted of a man and babygril is fine by me if i reaily like the guy......................jessica rains

[Jonianne]

CD - Here on the forum any of those is fine to me.

Out in the world, I love it when I am called sweetie, etc by females, whenever I am enfemme or in drab.

[GypsyKaren]

I worry about much more important things than what people call me, like which pair of socks to wear that day. I dare say you'll find some who find being referred to as Mother Theresa offensive, so trying to be PC for everyone is impossible, I'll just stick with the socks issue.

Karen Starlene :star:

[Ásfríðr]

gurl makes me feel a little funny, but only when its written. means you're not a girl proper, but i spose really, transwoman is a little different from woman.

don't mind all girlies, hunnies, sweeties ect. hell i use them all the time to the straight peeps i know. they're a bit cute, and i think they just think i'm being silly when i use them.

so to answer your question sweetums, i'm anything you want me to be x

(except "sir"! i bloody hate sirs, misters, mates ect)

[Samantha B L]

I enjoy being called Samantha. And I don't mind "honey" and "babe" and all that stuff. I didn't know that some people had a thing for calling m to f CD'rs "gurls" until 2004 when I started to have a peak at various CD forums and websites including this one.

[Wendy me]

lol i have been called about every thing so no matter................

[erickka]

I'm called a whole helluva lot worse than that in male mode, so I suppose any of the aforementioned "names" is a good thing!!

[Empress Lainie]

I like all the endearing terms for women, and I like being called Ms N very much. I have even been called Mrs. N.before I changed my name which gave me a chuckle.

I can't tell the difference when spoken between gurl or girl, so guess I don't mind. Writing I prefer girl or woman.

I would hate to be called SIR (hasn't happened yet since my Epiphany except once and the waitress said she just calls everyone sir automatically some times and apologized.

Over the phone I am called sir until I correct them if they don't know me already. Sorry my voice to the uninitiated will sound more male than female.

I use sweety, honey, etc. for all the gg's I know.

EDITED: No offense intended to male CD's here, but I would not like someone to think I was a male CD or a guy in a dress or skirt. I have wondered if male CD's resent being thought of as transwomen or "trannies"? Might be a good thread subject.

Edit 2 8-21: I also like being called Miss Lainie, my eye dr's ofc does that.

[Joy Carter]

No matter what you call me, just don't call me late for dinner.:D

[Angie G]

I don't care for the word Gurl. calling me a GIRL is fine or sweetie or honey. I really can't see anyone calling my a babe at my age. :hugs:
Angie

[victoriamwilliams1]

I have no problems with any of those terms and as long as Gurl is used correctly I have no problems. I have been getting allot of Miss Victoria. I do remember the first time I was caled mam in public and I felt great.

[valenstein]

CD - Here on the forum any of those is fine to me.



It is different here, I don't mind it so much.

I don't like it when strangers call me "baby". I'm not big on all the cutesy words, but whatever works for each person is ok. "Tranny" is a word that's fine for me here, but not okay for some stranger (unless they are a tranny or show me respect first).

[tracigirl_tv]

I love them all :)

[Daintre]

I suggest that when getting a hold of me, you do not refer to me as a "gurl" or "hon". I dislike these terms like you cannot believe.

[KarenSusan]

I don't care much for gurl. Everything else is okay.

[Susan Watersfield]

I'm happy with most of them. I always take them in the sense of one woman speaking to another.

However, until this thread came along I wan't really aware of the correct definition of "gurl". It seems it means a young person of either sex.

I'm not young :( and I prefer to be considered female. So I won't be using the term anymore.

Luv

Susan

[Nicole Erin]

All those terms of endearment I don't mind. "Baby girl" might bother me cause it sounds ghetto.

So this word "gurl", is it pronounced like the normal "girl". Is it one of those online leet speak terms? Help me out here...


No matter what you call me, just don't call me late for dinner.:D

She ain't joking, I called her "Late for dinner" once and she drove all the way from Ohio and we duked it out in the front yard of my place! :eek:

[Sasha Anne Meadows]

Actually the middle English definition of gurl was a young person of either gender..

[gagirl1]

i haven't been called a "gurl" yet, but i don't think i would like it. however, i do know someone who calls me "doll" and i love it. makes me feel all cute inside. she started calling me that before i told her about my dressing and when she heard the news, she just broke out laughing about the doll thing. i think it's sweet.

[janexx]

My greatest moment was when in a shop and the male assistant asked "Can I help you madam?" hard not to break the pass as I went week at the knees - and me a "Glamorous GrannY!". Do remember all I do live in the UK - hence the Madam.

I hate gurl but that again might be my being a Brit.

Jane is my favourite as that is me - all over.

Madam is a bit too formal - but lovely when out in a shop.

Too old for Miss - shame!

Anything polite and fem will do.

Love,

Jane

[Claire3]

Never been called gurl,guess if it comes across as a term of endearment or just in an ok way,then no problem as with most others

[CD Susan]

The terms gurl and girl sound the same when spoken so the only time you are being called gurl is when it is written. I always wondered where this term originated from and assumed it referred to a tgirl. I do not mind being called any of these cute girly terms. If I ever travel to Britain I hope no one calls me a 'bloke'. Not being a Brit I find this term confusing.

[Stargirl]

Chick. Chik. Do FTM 's get upset by being called "Boi" ? I haven't heard them complain. I always assumed "Gurl" was a general spelling for cd "girls", so as not to confuse people. I have spelled it "gurl". Will I be sent to the dungeon ?
I hope not. I still have cookies left to eat.

[Kayla_CD]

I definitely don't mind being called any of those cute little names. Being treated like a woman is a big part of dressing up, so I'll take all I'm given.

As for the term gurl: I personally have no problem with that. It is partially because I would never identify myself as a girl. I'm not a girl, I'm a man who occasionally dresses in women's clothing. I'd have to believe if a person were fully transitioned they may not like the label, but it suits me fine. I also find that for the sake of being on the net and meeting people on websites a label like gurl lets other people know your story (or at least, the beginning of it) right away.

[Melissa A.]

As for the term gurl: I personally have no problem with that. It is partially because I would never identify myself as a girl. I'm not a girl, I'm a man who occasionally dresses in women's clothing. I'd have to believe if a person were fully transitioned they may not like the label, but it suits me fine. I also find that for the sake of being on the net and meeting people on websites a label like gurl lets other people know your story (or at least, the beginning of it) right away.

I think that covers "gurl" pretty well. As a ts, I don't care for it. Interstingly enough, I do not mind being reffered to as trans. I guess because it's true, and I'm still very much in transition. Ask me in a couple of years. I might feel differently.

If a guy calls me "babe" He'd better Know for certain that he's allowed to, and if that's the case, he can call me anything he wants! :o

Hugs,

Melissa:)

[Carroll]

Gurl just looks and sounds stupid


No matter what you call me, just don't call me late for dinner.:D

You stole what I was going to say

[docrobbysherry]

what u call me. ( Good thing, too!):D

I'm uncomfortable using the term "gurl" myself!

[Anna the Dub]

I don't mind any of the little endearments at all, babe, hon, whatever. Quite nice actually. But I hate the term 'gurl'. It certainly does not apply to me. As a ts myself, and as Melissa said above, I do not care for it at all. I would accept 'trans' as well, as I am also ongoing transition.

[gagirl1]

honestly, anything is better than "transvestite."

[susan fuller]

I had not heard the term gurl till I got on this web and I thought it was just a term used by some people instead of girl. I do prefer the word girl as it is what I like to be. But when I am dressed any name that indicates a female is alright with me.

[DemonicDaughter]

Chick. Chik. Do FTM 's get upset by being called "Boi" ? I haven't heard them complain. I always assumed "Gurl" was a general spelling for cd "girls", so as not to confuse people. I have spelled it "gurl". Will I be sent to the dungeon ?
I hope not. I still have cookies left to eat.

Well if they do send you to the dungeon, at least I'll have some good company. (try to sneak in some lip-plumper and cookies, will ya?)

I'm guilty of using the term "gurl" but not because I felt anyone was or wasn't a girl. I use it because I don't see CDers or TS as ordinary women. I like the distinction. But that's just me.

I'm also well known for calling people "hunnie" and "hun". Why? Because I can't remember everyone's name! LOL! Its so much easier referring to someone in an endearing term than trying to remember what they prefer being referred to as. I have more nicknames than any baroness in history so if someone refers to me as honey or sweetie... I accept it.

Now things like "babe".... you better be someone I'm pretty effin close to for terms like that.

[amber 07]

I had thought, maybe mistakenly, that GURL is a combination of 2 words. GU y and gi RL. Hence GURL. If thats the case I would trust that is true for nearly all of us on this site except the GG's. Hugs, Amber

[KimberlyS]

I do not mind being called most things including a gurl, tranny, he and sir. It is all in the context and how it is used or said that may bother me. A name / label / box, just like most words are just ways to communicate and allow others to relate to who we are. Most words and labels are very relative to the person using it and what they can relate to. And the words and labels often may need some clarification to make sure both sides are interacting about the same thing.

[CaptLex]

I had thought, maybe mistakenly, that GURL is a combination of 2 words. GU y and gi RL. Hence GURL. If thats the case I would trust that is true for nearly all of us on this site except the GG's. Hugs, Amber
Amend that to: except GGs/FABs, TSs and FtMs on this site.

[deja true]

Well, heck,y'all!

I went to the urban dictionary to find a definition of "gurl" that matched the way that I think many of us use it here. But among the 20 definitions that ranged from "ice bit@h queen on E" to drag queen" to "Southern girl child", I diidn't find one that matched my idea!

I've used it occassionally when addressing the range of members here as in "Boys and girls and gurls" in order to make my statement all inclusive. But after seeing how many of our trans-women feel about the word , I'm gonna give up using "gurl" and "gurlz".

Never meant to hurt. Just used it after I found it here in the first place.

(I included "Babe" on purpose after rememberiing how Pam Anderson's character Barb Wire used to beat the poop outta any guy that ever called her that. :D

And I see that Melissa and DD have the same opinion of the word. So, knowing that those are a coupla tough ba...er....ladies, I may forego that one, too!)

Funny how our language can mean so many diferent things to so many people, ain't it? :)

Thanks ladies!

..and gent!

[PamelaTX]

I love all the little endearments, please keep them coming. I don't especially like the word "gurl" because the word looks ugly to me. (Although it's certainly not as bad as "transvestite".) "Girl" is a pretty looking word, but I actually prefer to think of myself as a lady. The word "lady" sounds classy and elegant to me, and that's how I like to think of myself.

[Aurora27]

Gurl, honey, sweetie etc, any feminine endearment - never been a huge fan of using them or hearing them applied to myself. To me they generally onjure images of someone cutesy or dainty, and at 6'2" with an ill-proportioned body (long torso, kinda short legs) I don't feel either, but thats just me.

[tricia_uktv]

I don't really like being called man, or boy, or bloke. Other than that, fine!

I went dressed to a pub on Sunday lunchtime. A little girl noticed me as I was leaving. Her comment to her Father was "Is that a real girl?" I suppose at least I've got people thinking now!

[Sarah...]

I love the feminine endearments you list and just love to be called by any one of them.

Sadly it doesn't happen very often.

As long as I'm not referred to as man, boy, he, oi you or guy then I'm happy.

Sarah...

[Butterfly Bill]

In conversation, do you mind being called "sweetie" or "darlin'" or "Honey" or "babygirl" or "Babe" or any other of those little personal endearments that many of us (including myself) use?

If you don't like being called any of these, you'll never survive being in Oklahoma or any other place in the American South. Waitresses and salesladies call strangers with such words as a matter of custom, whatever their gender or however they're dressed.

[Ayame]

I guess it depends on the person me myself I don't like any term that calls me a female because I never look at myself as a girl or woman always a guy. However I am getting more use to them because it would be hard for the thousands of people that use these forums to get used to calling me or anyone else by what they prefer.

[tamarav]

I don't mind any of the endearments, but I dislike the word "tranny" . All I can think of is that 700R4 I dropped into reverse at 80..

Believe it or not, I still like "skinny bitch" but only when applied by the right person.

Your sis,

Tami

[PaulaPts]

Gurl just seems like such an odd term to me. Boi as well. Why make up words.
If you're dressed and feminine it seems that girl or woman should apply. For those in transition girl or woman should always apply since you are one (perhaps for the want of some anatomical oddity).

[Sharon]

I think "gurl" is silly, but it doesn't bother me.

[Jilmac]

When I'm en femme you can call me by any personal endearment you would like, the same as you would any GG. However when I'm in drab I prefer to be called by my given name.

[lisa_vin]

Hi! Any femme term of endearment is just absolutely fine with me!:daydreaming:

[charlie]

Anything except Sir will do when I'm dressed. Honey, sweetie and cutie are all good!

[jennifer41356]

I too hate Gurl, also hate being referred to as Hun as well:2c:

[Kayla Shadows]

Hey Deja.I guess it all depends on who its coming from and the way it is used.I can accept it or choose to ignore it.Friendly conversation is fine.Calling me out to let me know I'm not a real girl is fine.I am who I am and there is no reason to feel bad about it.

The weight of words is only the power you allow someone to have over you.If you don't give it,they cant take it.

[TSchapes]

In conversation, do you mind being called "sweetie" or "darlin'" or "Honey" or "babygirl" or "Babe" or any other of those little personal endearments that many of us (including myself) use?
Not at all, I've been called so much worse in both modes that any "terms of endearment" are fine with me.



Do you mind being referred to as a "gurl" in any situation?

I never saw an official definition of this term until I looked out on the Internet just now. It says it's a young person of either sex. This seems odd to me, but if that's what it is, then that's OK by me too. Prior to my little search I always thought it was used as shorthand for a non-genetic girl, i.e. transgendered or transsexual. In that context I didn't care for it, but then again, it was probably my ignorance of how it was being used. I certainly didn't have any ill will against the person that used it. Again, I've been called worse!

Love, Tracy

[sissystephanie]

Living in the South as I do, I long ago got used to being called "Sweetie", "Darlin," and Honey" no matter how I was dressed. It is the language of the South!

As far as being called a "gurl", I don't recall that ever happening. And if it did happen, the person saying that, if male, probably had a bloody nose or worse. When dressed I am either a girl or a lady, at least outwardly! "Gurl" to me is a slang term and I don't wish to be referred to that way!:thumbsdn:

Sissy/Stephanie

Lady on the outside, but man underneath!

[suchacutie]

All the endearments are just fine. GGs use these all the time :)

I really don't have a problem with gurl but I just don't see the need for it.

tina

[Kendra (Tx)]

I don't mind being called "honey", "sweetheart" ( or "sweetie" ), "baby" ( or "babe" ) "Darling", or even the occasional "sexy"...It gets this girl all blushed and smiley...:heehee:...I guess it's a reaffirmation as to how I'm doing in my femme personna...I'm like the others in here..."Gurl" is a definite "no-no" as well as "babygirl"...That term I feel is ususally reserved for those who are under the age of 21 and still pop their gum......( and goodness knows, I haven't seen 21 in quite a while..;)....LOL )

http://kendra954.com

[trannie T]

The word is spelled, Gee Eye Are Ell. I have an intense dislike for 'cute' spelling.

Aside from that you can call me anything you wish, women often call me 'sweetie,' the first time a man used the word to me [I was en femme] I was surprised but pleased.

[Amy Hepker]

I have been called a lot of different things so it does not matter to me.

[Tiffy]

I do not mind at all and maybe even get disappointed if someone I look up to does not refer to me in anyway special.

Tiffany

[obsessedwithpantyhose]

i dont mind at all :D

[sterling12]

I don't mind being called anything. Words only have the power to hurt us, if we allow them to hurt!

I use Gurl a lot in my writing around here. Perhaps it's an affectation, perhaps it's irritating, but it sure is an easy way to designate between GG's and CD's. Actually it's a bit of pain for me too. Every time I use spellchek, it just doesn't like that word!

As previously mentioned, it's strictly a writing devise. I think a lot of us are being a bit over-sensitive. But, everyone is entitled to "wish" for whatever they want.....just doesn't mean it's going to happen!

Peace and Love, Joanie

[Nicki B]

Prior to my little search I always thought it was used as shorthand for a non-genetic girl, i.e. transgendered or transsexual.

IME it's often used for t-girls; just like 'boi' is used sometimes for transmen.


I have an intense dislike for 'cute' spelling.

I don't think the intention is to be 'cute', more to be specific?


Even the use of 'wimmin' has a point - it has no 'men' in it.. :heehee:

[Claire3]

love them all

[Karin A]

I know this gets into the area of what is a ts, tv, cd, etc.... but do us CD's consider this to be a bad word? Personally I don't know enough to say one way or another, but I don't want to offend anyone that is transgender by using it to describe them.

I've heard it used by others. But was hoping some more of our experienced girlfriends could weigh in on whether or not I should watch out when I use it to describe someone.

Thanks,
Karin

[Mitzi]

I was surprised to find that some on this forum considered the term "gurl" to be demeaning.

I use it regularly to refer to us t-girls. To me, it's a cute apellation, and immediately connotes I'm referring to "us", rather than to "genetic girls".

Mitzi

[tvbeckytv]

me too mitzi

[Bethany_Anne_Fae]

I think its all in how one presents these terms to me. As words in general, I've been called all of them and more and I don't mind them unless they are spoken in a derogatory manner.

Zara

[Karin A]

Wow.... I did not expect such a diverse response on this one. I thought there was a clear definition about what it was.

Personally, I don't care if they refer to me as gurl, girl, woman, female, etc. when I'm online. It sounds the same as girl. But if someone only sees you online, then gurl, lets people know that you really are someone different from a real GG, and that you are not misrepresenting yourself as a woman. That is why I thought it was legit online... to tell others in a subtle way what you truly were.

Thank you all for such an interesting and diverse response!
Karin

[Karin A]

Hi Mitzi,
When I posted the question, I really thought that yours was the response that I would get mostly.... I like the word, because it differentiates us from the real GGs. I just wanted to find out the correct usage before I got flamed or totally offended the whole community.. :battingeyelashes:

[Nicki B]

There's no one right or wrong answer? Like so much in the trans world, really... :heehee:

[Sugar]

I'm not particularly fond of " old queen" myself. But what am I going to do?


sugar

[Rachel Morley]

You can call me anything you like .... sweetie, darlin, honey, babygirl, babe, gurl, girly-boy, you can even call me sissy but please don't ever call me a "man"! I hate that! I can tolerate "guy" ... at a push.

[Empress Lainie]

Actually the middle English definition of gurl was a young person of either gender..

See how educational this place is? at 73 I never knew that before.

[amber 07]

Sorry Capt'n Lex if you were offended by my response, but I consider GG and FAB the same, are they not? and there was no reference to TS nor Trans Men because I was addressing Specifically the people in the Male to Female Crossdressing site. No offense intended. If I had meant to include the others I would have posted on a different section. Hugs, Amber

[Melissa A.]

To those all of a sudden worried-I did say that I don't prefer the term gurl, but that doesn't mean it's really that big a deal. I understand what's meant and I'm never offended by it.

Hugs,

Melissa:)

[DonnaT]

I don't mind terms of endearment.

My question is, how is girl (Pronunciation: \ˈgər(-ə)l\ ) pronounced any different from gurl?

sounds the same to me, so how can you tell if someone is saying girl or gurl? Especially concidering the different accent people have from different localities.

[bijust4funjax1]

i think if i can get a guy or girl to call me sweatie or any other female name, i think i may have a heartattack for pulling off my cd look, lol

i can see why some people would not like to be call that, but IMO as long as it is not a bad term for females, i can accept it

[jenni_xx]

I don't mind either gurl, or babe, and I love the term sweetie (coz I am lol).

I think the "gurl" expression came about because it is a implicit/referential exaggeration of the word - you know, like when someone is mocking you in a fun way - you guurrrll.

Plus, it's kinda cool to have our own take on the word. After all, it is a fact that we're not actually girls... It's a nice distinction in my opinion.

Question to all those who use the term gg. Do women like to be referred to as girls do you think? We don't often refer to men as boys after all...

[justmetoo]

I don't know about "gurl". Never heard or saw it before as far as I can recall. Women can call me any term of endearment they want, especially my girlfriend. :D I prefer other guys to use less "endearing" terms. Otherwise, since I am a guy (even if I do like some girly stuff) I don't refer to myself by female pronouns or a female name.
You can refer to me as a guy or bloke if you like, but I'm not a gurl or a girl or a lady or anyone's sister. I'll answer to my name, to mister or to a polite request. Sir is a bit too formal for my taste. You can call me sweetie, honey, hun, dude, or by my name, just don't call me late for dessert! :D

[MsJanessa]

"Babe"?? I don't think so---It's "Mistress" to you---:dom: lol

[Janice1948]

I agree completely with Tracigirl, I love them all but if you must know, sweetie and honey are my favorites.

[Cathytg]

I go out very rarely - I do not look all that great - and so I rarely get called anything. But once in a while a waitress has looked at my wife and I and asked what we ladies would like to order. I loved it.

I am not a girl and am not a gurl. I am a man with strong feminine tendencies. But it would be wonderful if I could go out often and be addressed as a woman. That would be a "feel good". It seems that being called a lady when dressed and a man when drab feels so very right. Now I am left wondering why that is so.

[Kate Simmons]

Fine with me Deja. I don't mind being called whatever. However, I'm not a "gurl" or a "girl", just a guy who has fun dressing up sometimes.:)

[DemonicDaughter]

"Babe"?? I don't think so---It's "Mistress" to you---:dom: lol

If I'm not mistaken... Deja already calls someone that....

[Sarah Doepner]

The only thing that I don't like being called is "sir" when I'm dressed en femme. I may not pass, but at least give me credit for the effort. It's hard work getting from what I normally look like to what I would like to be.

[Empress Lainie]

honestly, anything is better than "transvestite."

Yes it sounds like a political party. Will the transvestite government withstand the challenge of the labor party?

[Toni_Lynn]

Hmmm .... well ... I prefer the word GIRL over gurl and over woman.

Gurl comes off as a phony made up term to me.

Woman, well, I can't explain it. It just doesn't fit me.

As to babe, honey, etc ... ahh --- nah.

But GIRL! GIRL! I love the word. I love the sound of it. I love the shape of the letters. It just fits who I am.


Huggles

Toni-Lynn

[LilSissyStevie]

My family is from the South so you occasionally have to be reminded of your given name, otherwise you'll think it's "Honey." I really only care what my family and friends call me. The rest of the human race isn't important enough to me that I get too insulted by anything they say. I try to take it all in with detached amusement.

I don't think of myself as a female in any sense so gurl actually works better than girl for me. But, its not a term I would pick for myself. Outside of biology, I'm definitely not a man either. If I have to call myself something, I self identify as a sissy, fairy or pansy. I really like Nancy boy, too.
:love:

[michellebesweet]

I have used the term "Gurl" before, and I agree, it is really not proper. I would prefer to be called "Michelle". I do not mind, Honey, Babe, Sweetie, and I love it when someone says, "Hey Sexy", or "Hi Hottie", a girl loves to hear those words, at least this girl does.

[kimmy p]

Hi all. I've used the term "Gurl" here numerous times. I first saw it on this forum and thought that it was a tag that we had given ourselves as a group of CD's. Being isolated and not (knowingly) knowing any other CD's I didn't realize that some ladies were offended by the term. I offer my apologies and promise to use "Girls" when addressing groups of us from now on. Otherwise I'll try to remember to use names.

[Nicki B]

Being isolated and not (knowingly) knowing any other CD's I didn't realize that some ladies were offended by the term.

Some people are offended by the term TV, others by CD, some by TG - I wouldn't worry too much.. ;)