How much could you live with?

[paulaluvssz8]

Hi all, it's good to see all of you still hanging around. Here is my question. If your SO was somewhat tolerant of your dressing as long as it didn't cause you to lose your job or family. How much could you get by with for yourself?

Panties?
Bra?
Hose?
Dresses?

I want to find a common ground with my wife and to do so I would like to consider what I could do to enjoy myself and still respect her wishes. So think about it and see what you could live with.:D

[Nicole Erin]

I don't really understand what you are getting at but here is my thing -

I could easily live without a bra, but not the hose.

[Tina B.]

Hi all, it's good to see all of you still hanging around. Here is my question. If your SO was somewhat tolerant of your dressing as long as it didn't cause you to lose your job or family. How much could you get by with for yourself?

Panties?
Bra?
Hose?
Dresses?

I want to find a common ground with my wife and to do so I would like to consider what I could do to enjoy myself and still respect her wishes. So think about it and see what you could live with.:D

Paula, I too am not sure just what you are asking, not losing the job, and Friends, I could understand, but the Family, if the wife is somewhat understanding, I am not sure what limits that puts you under at home?
I for one can live without going out, where anything would be put in jepordy, but that leaves me free to wear what I choose to wear, at home. I am just not into partial dressing, it's kind of all or nothing with this girl. But if you are saying she doesn't want you dressing at home, because of how she feels, or because of kids in the house, that's different, then I would have to say I would need some alone time now and again, so I could be myself with out fear
of discovery.
I do underdress, but that alone just isn't enough!
Tina B.

[Jaclyn NM]

Well, for me, I need my thigh high stockings, nylon panties, and most of all, my 5 inch stiletto pumps.

[Karren H]

No middle ground here......... Just wearin one or two fem things just doesn't cut it any more... Its all or nothing for me.. So I doubt we would ever come to an agreement on that unless it somerthing to do with the time or duration or where I could or couldn't go out enfemme...

But we have a system... I crossdress when ever I get the chance and she just doesn't want to know about it...

[Kayla Shadows]

If she was only somewhat tolerant I dont think I could take it.Theres doing things to make someone happy and then theres being someone your not.If how I am isnt ok then they are with the wrong person.

[abundantly_me]

Get by? Just as much as she can get away with without exceeding her SO's comfort level. That's something you will have to work out with your SO. It still amazes me how many CDs take a SO's initial acceptance as more than it is. Frequently one's SO was just containing herself and didn't EXPLODE. And it can smolder for years until she has finally had enough. It's so sad that so many have to find this out the hard way. I suggest you be careful and don't push it, there is a happy medium somewhere acceptable to both of you.

Since it appears that your boundaries have yet to be established, I think you should practice getting out of what ever you are wearing in the shortest amount of time. The are some Olympic champions here that can offer a few pointers , yours truly among them.



Exactly as above, but I think your question is more like what could you dress in everyday without causing a ruckus? I know that when my guy wears female undies I'm perfectly fine with that. Sort of has the reverse effect on me, I find they sort of enhance that wonderful package of his! He may feel more 'enfemme' but trust me that is not how my mind views it.

But lastly, yes it's the comfort level between you and your SO, and everyone is unique in that respect.

[tricia_uktv]

I messed this up because I couldn't stop. Although she accepted me she didn't want me to show it to the outside world. I did though, wearing nail varnish and jewelery. So be very careful.

[Deanna2]

I wear a camisole, panties and pantyhose everyday. It is comfortable for me and my wife is comfortable with it also. Even when I wear lacy camis and panties.

[charlie]

Hello Paula Luv!
You need at least two outfits, your whole list twice! Preferably, you could interchange the outfits and get 4 out of them!

[RebeccaLynne]

No middle ground here......... Just wearin one or two fem things just doesn't cut it any more... Its all or nothing for me..

I gotta agree with Karen. The whole nine yards for me: panties, pantyhose, girdle (I'm kinda old-fashioned), bra (with forms, of course), slip, top and skirt (or dress, as appropriate), shoes, make-up, perfume, a girly deodorant, and jewelry. Lastly, side-part and brush my hair in a feminine style.

Now I'm complete.

And since my SO isn't 100% on-board with my preferences, we maintain separate residences.

I hope she comes around.

'Cause I gotta be happy.

All I ask is she accepts me for who I am.

'Cause I want her to be happy, too.

[Sporco]

I think your asking what of those items I would choose to live without given the choice between them and my wife...

My answer is "all of them". My wife is my best friend, my soulmate, my supporter, my defender, she is everything to me. My children are right in there with her (they don't know by the way).

She is ok with me dressing to whatever degree I like. She says she knows "it's part of you and I wouldn't have you change for anything".

If I had to give them up for some reason, I'd arrange them from most important to least important as follows...

fem. socks, tights, hose, thigh-higs, stockings & garters
panties & bras
camis, slips, lingerie (I wish they'd bring back teddies)
night gowns, fem sleepwear
fem shoes
fem outer clothes (jeans, pants, tops, blouses, dresses, skirts, etc.)
wigs, forms, make-up, jewelry

[Genifer Teal]

It is not a matter of the clothing, it is me being who I am. I can't give up being myself, can I? I can't go anywhere half dressed. What's the point? As for the list, you can have the hose. I rarely wear them anyway. lol

Gen

[Sarah Doepner]

I'm with Karen here as well. I can't "get by" with just a few things any longer. The goal here is to completely immerse myself in the feminine and produce the best simulation of a woman that this body can do. I need it all from underclothes and formwear to shoes, makeup and accessories.

by the way, Veruca Salt is the greedy little girl in Willy Wonka.

[MelanieSky]

I agree with Sarah. It's all or nothing for me now. It wasn't always that way. I used to get a turn on by wearing panties or hose all day under my male clothes, but those days are long gone. Now I need to be totally fem or there's no point. I get dressed so that I can go out! That's the biggest kick for me so only being partly dressed serves no purpose.

Hugs... :hugs:

Melanie

[Joy Carter]

There is zero tolerance in our house, when it comes to my gender uniqueness. Although after seven years wearing women's underpants, she said she's fine with that. My self, I'd love to be able to come home from work, and get a little dressed up once in a while. If not every day. I'm respectful of her wishes though

[susan2010]

My current relationship is going downhill fast, and probably won't last. If I'm in another relationship later, I'll establish upfront that my minimum is:
1. Free to go out to support meetings all dressed up; maybe a cd weekend event
2. wear panties (underdress) whenever I want
3. dress in the house when she is not around (minimum)

She wouldn't HAVE to see me dressed, or help me with make-up or shopping if she didn't want to, but she must be tolerant of what I do and who I am.
Susan1974

[paulaluvssz8]

Hi all, thanks again for the imput.

My wife some years back was okay with me wearing panties as long as it was just around the house, and she was fine with playing along during our private time we me dressed in other lingrie. But when I revealed the desire to dress in full femm. She lost her mind. Her concern was that I would want to become a woman full time and that she would lose her man. She demanded that I stop all together. So for a while I did.

Since then she has found some panties and bras that I bought and questioned me about them, and said that she did not want me buying those things again. With her being so set that she doesn't want anything to do with my desire to dress makes it difficult for me to know what to do. So I am looking for some common ground that I can dress and stay with my family.
I would be totally fine with the things the way they were with just wearing panites from time to time as long as she would share in it with me. Knowing and accepting it. That is the reason for my question about how much you could live with.

Karen, if I was as passable as you are then I would want to go out dressed. Your a beautiful woman. And I can see why it is all or nothing for you. :heehee:

Again thanks for your imput. I hope that maybe this will help to understand what my qustion was about.:)

[Cathytg]

Paula, I think I understand your question, but I doubt that you will like my answer.

The panties are simple because she doesn't have too see them. I can't see where that implies a very high level of tolerance, so I am guessing that there is very little you can add to your wardrobe at this point.

Based on what you have said here, I am thinking that the two of you need to talk about what your dressing really means. She has said that her fear is that you will want to become a woman. Do you? Are you certain where your heart is with all this? If dressing is "simply" a means of expressing who you are now and not who you wish you were, then perhaps you can find a way to show her that it's OK.

I doubt that finding a halfway meeting point with the clothes is going to be very satisfactory for either of you in your present climate. You may have to change the world you live in which would suggest that you may have to show her how to live in your CD world. You will have to be very gentle and be very supportive of her own femininity and your appreciation of it. How often do you tell her that she is pretty or that you find her exciting and sensuous?

You need to be certain of who you are and where your are going and she needs to be very certain of her own femininity and your love of it in her.

You can do it if you try.

[Angie G]

Talk to her we don't know how she feels about your dressing. After talking to my wife I started with skirts then panties and so on That was 3 years ago now I fully dress from top to bottom. She is the only one that can say what she can handle so talk it out hun.:hugs:
Angie