Please Forgive Me, I'm Hurting

[Hinata]

I've just had one of those days, and right now I question my saftey(I wont kill myself) but I feel very close. I woke from a very tramatic dream, thats all thats need said. Then went to work(with the dream still lingering), focused on my work, and getting alot done btw. Then my boss says go work on this other project(knowing full well that we are behind). I start this project at noon, and at 1 he still hasn't touched the job in line. By the time I came in to go home (4) the job was just half finished, a half hour job. Then he says that he needs to take off on friday and won't be back for 2 weeks! So the thing is that I will be running the show BY MYSELF :eek:. And to just top it off a little my mothers car is dead in the water and my truck is soon to follow. My sisters are to far away to realy help, so it falls on me, AGAIN. So now I need to take out a loan, take care of my mother, run the shop, manage the upkeep of the house, and then try to hold myself together with no SO. I took a shower(hoping it would help) shaved my legs and my pits and my face, didn't bother with the rest. Then i put on my panties and a new set of femme jeans (love the fit!). Still no luck, Just as pissed off and upset as when I got home. Tied on a few drinks and now I'm writing/venting this. I have to admit that lately Hinata is in more controll and thats o.k. She grew out her nails and I was upset that she broke one. But I digress, I just hope that this day will pass with no more stress. Btw I started this post with Evanescence playing at full volume and now that I've vented a little I now am ending it with Feist ( I feel it all).

Thanks:cry:for listening

Hinata

p.s I love you all :love:

[deja true]

Oh, baby...what a $hitty day!

Come for some hugs and pets and few soothing sounds from us.

You can vent all you want (within reason). :D

Don't seem it can get much worse though, does it?

Well, it probably can't!

Let us know how you feel tomorrow after a good night's sleep, okay?

:<3:

[Maria2222]

Hi Hinata,
I haven't been here long, but one thing I've learned is that there are very many wonderful and caring people here to help you if you have a problem and to listen if you need to talk to someone.
I hope tomorrow will be a much better day for you.
:thumbsup:

[Joy Carter]

Been there friend. Just stay away from the alcohol. It depresses you, and affects your performance the next day. Your mom loves you, and she needs you to be clear. :hugs:

[Holly]

Sorry Hinata that your day was so crummy. Believe me, I know how awful things can seem sometimes. It will get better. Enjoy and savor the things that bring you joy and tolerate the things you must. A jobis just that... a job. It's a means to enjoy the other parts lof life that make you happy. ANd you can vent here anytime you want. :hugs:

[Cathytg]

Wow! Why do you suppose days manage to get filled up with so much junk? It hardly seems fair. When I was little I had a teddy bear that I would beat on when I got into the same kind of spot where you find yourself now. I can only imagine what that kind of therapy would cost today with adults. Do you have a teddy bear? At least you have us.

Maybe some days get so bad that you just need to enjoy feeling miserable. Good night.

[Sally2005]

Life sucks sometimes! Find something that you enjoy to do so that you can forget about the problems for a while. Sometimes the best cure for getting dumped on with other peoples problems is to let some of them land on the floor. Just last week I spent 2 days dealing with my SOs car trouble, I tried to fix it, in the rain, no less, getting knuckes dirty and all only to give up because I asked myself, why am I trying to save her a couple hundred bucks when I have list a mile long of other stuff I need to do? All I got for my time was a 'thanks for trying', never mind the effort I put in to starting to fix and diagnosing the issue. Arugh. Then a couple days later her engine light is on...so who gets bugged every 15 minutes to look at it? I blew up, I was triing to fix something on my own car that I have not had time to do for 6 months! ...I feel your pain.

[Christinedreamer]

The last ten years have been very difficult for me caring for a SO with a rare neurological disease and her useless daughter. Then my biz has suffered greatly and only now am I able to some light again. I do have a secret though, well not really a secret and some would say I was kinda old fashioned or corny.

When I need to seriously destress, I put on a fave peignoir, turn out the lights have ONE glass of red wine and listen to a couple hours of Yanni or Celtic Women. Pure music and angelic voices.

I also talk to God- a lot. Not like the formal religious scholars entreat us to do, but rather just like a close friend is is at my side right then and there. The music calms me and the talks with God refocus me.

It works. The music resets your internal rythyms and its like rebooting. try it, you'll like it and then you may find that all the pressures may be there still but you will find the ability to work through the issues one by one.

[Tracii G]

When the $%&@ starts to hit the fan I do deep breathing it does help to calm the body down and get you back into your old self.
Hope tomorrow is a peach.

[Audrey34]

Sorry things were so crappy for you Hinata. I've been there myself. Many days I felt as if the boss was taking advantage of me and not being very appreciative of my efforts. Just listen to the ladies here, plenty of love and support all around here!
-Audrey

[Zenith]

If the jeans aren't working...try a dress...or skirt...treat yourself well right now girlfriend!

:itsok:

:bighug:

[tommi]

It seems when it rains it pours. Do your best to take some time to yourself but also take time to vent out bottling up doesn't help.
I found a huge mistake in my check book adding when I should have subtracted. Trying to figure how to pay my bills now but just working it thru and not pressing too much.
Take a long bubble bath girl you deserve it.:hugs:

[Hinata]

Thanks in part to what everyone has said. I will try some of the methods, I think they will work. :) Thanks for all the love :hugs: and for letting me vent. And Zenith, yes I think the dress is on for tonight, just need shoes now:sad:

Thank you all :love: you really did help me

With love and thanks, Hinata

[Angie G]

Well I hope everything settles down hun. :hugs:
Angie

[trannie T]

I really enjoyed reading this thread. Sometimes I forget why I'm enjoying my retirement so much.