No interest in "passing"

[Skirtboy]

How many of you have no interest in "passing" as an actual Girl? While I can see how it could be fun sometimes, and I certainly try to minimize bulges, generally I 'm just me, in a dress. I'll pad to make it hang right, but that's about it.

[BETH H]

I don't care about passing because I can't when i go out i where fem clothes under my drab sometimes i get fully dressed and go out at night or to a secluded spot

BETH

[stevie b]

For me, it's to be as close as possible to looking like a women so I can pass. I don't like to think of myself as a man in a dress its more than that.
I have been told by others CD's that I'm passable but have not gone far into the public domain yet, time will tell.
xx

[2b.Lauren]

I think I am a lot like skirtboy for now. We are all at different stages and phases with our dressing. Some are at the point where they are going out frequently and are concerned about passing and being in the role of a female. Others are new and can only get away with panties and a cami under drab. Some can put on clear polish and lip gloss, others for various reasons can't risk getting caught. I say we are in a world of non acceptance of who we are, so we need to be able to accept ourselves at the stage we are in with our femme life. I have been dressing off and on (more on than off) most of my life. I never had the urge to go out or to try to pass for most of my time dressing, I had the fantasy but not the true desire. I am now entering a phase where I want to take more risks to be feminine. I want more acceptance not only from myself. I am slowly progressing towards trying to pass when I dress. So just accept yourself and enjoy what you are doing.

Lauren

[Josey]

I've been a CDer for many years. I'm not motivated to dress in fem 24/7 to pass as a woman. I enjoy various dressing activites from nightware to dayware. I doubt I could ever pass as a women even if I wanted to. I'm more than content with CDing at home with the support of my wife. She mends my clothes and does my laudry each week...a wonderful thing to have the support.

[Kate Simmons]

I've always felt the word "passing" infers we are taking some kind of test. Who is qualified to administer such a test? No one I know of. Wear what makes you happy my friend and enjoy.:)

[TommiTN]

Define "passing". To me that term implies that all observers in all situations believe you are a GG. Probably less than 10% of us can achieve that. So my goal, rather than passing, is acceptance through looking and acting as femme as I can knowing that I will be read more often than not, at least up close. In other words, I don't care if I'm read as long as the reader accepts me in my presentation as a lady and treats me accordingly.

[MsJanessa]

Define "passing". To me that term implies that all observers in all situations believe you are a GG. Probably less than 10% of us can achieve that. So my goal, rather than passing, is acceptance through looking and acting as femme as I can knowing that I will be read more often than not, at least up close. In other words, I don't care if I'm read as long as the reader accepts me in my presentation as a lady and treats me accordingly.

you are absolutly in sync with Me on this Tammi---passing to me is more about being excepted for who and what I am. Those CD/TGs who actually pass as GGs tend to be more ordinary looking, thence they don't attract any notice---I would rather be noticed as a hot CD/TG than a plain GG anyday

[TommiTN]

you are absolutly in sync with Me on this Tammi---passing to me is more about being excepted for who and what I am. Those CD/TGs who actually pass as GGs tend to be more ordinary looking, thence they don't attract any notice---I would rather be noticed as a hot CD/TG than a plain GG anyday

Perhaps I should have worded that a little differently. I do try to blend in by dressing and making myself up appropriately for the situation. Blending in is different from "passing". When I'm out and about I'd rather not be the center of attention. I guess the reaction I'm looking for is, "Yep, there's a CDer, but she sure has good taste and presents herself well so I will reward her efforts by treating her like a lady." That's my definition of acceptance.

[Crissy Kay]

As a part time cder, I still have no interest in "passing". I do like to dress up fully with make up, etc, but that is for myself, and my pics that I like to take with my web cam!!!

[Holly]

I happy to pass as a human being, content with herself. Whether others perceive me as male or female holds little interest to me. As long as I can look at myself in the mirror and say, "This is the best me I can present today," I've "passed."

[TommiTN]

I happy to pass as a human being, content with herself. Whether others perceive me as male or female holds little interest to me. As long as I can look at myself in the mirror and say, "This is the best me I can present today," I've "passed."


Exactly!

[harmony]

passing-especially for another cder-it takes one to know one!-almost impossible and not necessary in my opinion.
and yet the more well put together and tastefully adorned of us are out there working the crowds the more our image as a whole will improve.

[lmildcd]

I don't worry about passing because I am content to stay indoors while dressed.

[Kate Lynn]

Since an auto accident 15 years ago the meds have caused me to gain weight,and I no longer try to "pass" as a woman/girl any more.

[Angie G]

Not hat much, It would be hard to pass this face.Though I so some tims wish. :hugs:
Angie

[valenstein]

I wouldn't say I have NO interest, but passing doesn't mean much to me. I'll take 100 photos to get one good one I like, but that's just for my own vanity.

I have a GG friend who accepts this person in my head no matter how I'm dressed, and that is "passing" to me ten times more than any other situation I can come up with.

[Butterfly Bill]

The only passing I do is at the dinner table, on the highway in my car, and in the examination room. (I don't play football or basketball, so I don't do it there.)

[MsJanessa]

Perhaps I should have worded that a little differently. I do try to blend in by dressing and making myself up appropriately for the situation. Blending in is different from "passing". When I'm out and about I'd rather not be the center of attention. I guess the reaction I'm looking for is, "Yep, there's a CDer, but she sure has good taste and presents herself well so I will reward her efforts by treating her like a lady." That's my definition of acceptance.

Ahhh I see--but Me--I like being the center of attention as long as it's positive attention---kind of an exhibitionist I suppose

[Mitch23]

I dress as they do and act as they do but as for 'passing' - I would be deceiving myself. I think that I blend in that most of the time folks either don't notice or don't care. I'm a 6'2" skinny guy who actually looks quite good in a frock and as long as I don't embarrass myself or others then I just get on with it.

mitch

[michelle64]

no interest in passing...course have no problems passing...the main thing to passing is your confidence...if you go out and act like a wet noodle people are ging to pick up on it very very quickly..

[Jilmac]

I've mentioned this before in previous threads but I'll say it again. I have been out for less than a year and have never been more pleased with public reaction. I never considered myself passable i.e. fooling others into thinking I was a woman, but I have been told by others (not tg girls) that I am very passable.

That being said, I think "blending in" with the crowd is passing. I know I have been read numerous times in my outings but it really doesn't bother me because I know I am not a woman, and all the makeup in the world isn't going to make me appear any more feminine than the clothes I choose to wear.

After one particular outing, I walked into a McDonalds just to use the ladies room and was read by a male customer as I was leaving. He leaned over to his wife and said something to her as I walked out the door. When I got to my car, I could see him staring me down so I just flashed a big grin and waved. His face turned beet red and he looked away as I drove away knowing I didn't fool anybody. I'll bet he wished he could have been me.

[charlie]

Hey, I would love to know that I pass in public. That way I would not worry about the yahoos that would accost us and make fun of us when we go out in public. However, I know that I am just a transvestite and I try to be the best transvestite that I can be. I dress like a lady and try to be the most tasteful dresser that I can. Getting the dress right for me is more then half the battle. When I really love my outfit and makeup then I step out and let other people see me.

[LACD]

I would love to be able to pass but I probably never will be able to. I want badly to go out dressed but I am afraid of the reaction I would get. I read about others here and it gives me hope. I keep thinking of my first time out fully dressed and I would love to be able to shop and maybe have lunch or go to a matinee movie. One day maybe. But to pass, I am happy now being able to dress and have Dear Wifes' help in fashion and such. Sorry for the long post but sometimes people don't seem to appreciate the gift of being transgendered.

[TommiTN]

I would love to be able to pass but I probably never will be able to. I want badly to go out dressed but I am afraid of the reaction I would get. I read about others here and it gives me hope. I keep thinking of my first time out fully dressed and I would love to be able to shop and maybe have lunch or go to a matinee movie. One day maybe. But to pass, I am happy now being able to dress and have Dear Wifes' help in fashion and such. Sorry for the long post but sometimes people don't seem to appreciate the gift of being transgendered.

Have you considered getting out with a group? I belong to one and most of us aren't passable in the strict definition but that doesn't stop us from getting out. We shop, lunch and do other activities and rarely get more than stares from the general public. I'm not married or in a relationship at the moment, but most of the girls in the group are and many of the wives/SOs come with us. Find the local chapter of Tri Ess or another group in your area. If you really want to get out this is the way to do it. But be warned: once you go out you'll want to do it more. It is as addictive as crack!

[Stephanie Michelle]

In my younger days I felt that I might pass except for the fact that I am 6'3" tall. As I get older I have taken on a more masculine look and I am not confident to go out enfemme.

StephaniE

[Tracy_Victoria]

Does this not all depend on your ideas, and goals on passing. Ie a guy that dresses up and at a 1000 yards in the dark from the back, if he is mistaken for a woman, then that is passing. if your talking about close quarter combat at arms length with members of the general public, then thats a totally different form of passing and that takes years of Practice, money (to buy suitable outfits, wigs and accessories) and loads of confidence.

It doesn't really matter if you dress, and want to pass, or just do your own thing, the most important thing is being happy with you ability, and if your not, you need to move your goal. As there are many woman out there that look manly, many are taller that six foot, and woman come in small tall fat thin and ugly! The same as there are many TV that pass Daily in public, and there not all size 10, and under 5 foot eight!

Passing (IMHO) is something anybody can do, the level to which people can pass at, is another totally different matter?

[KimberlyS]

I would rather go out enfemme and present my male self in a feminine clothing and not wear a wig and little to no makeup. But I have a wife and kids, and we live in a small town. A TG friend in a near by town came out and I know what happened there and it was not pretty. I to not want to put my family through that. And I would like to continue to provide for my family. As my wife and I have discussed it is best if I would always go out either presenting my male self or as my feminine self in a view that is acceptable by society and this small town. It is a compromise I can easily live with. But when I am away from home, way way away from home, and away from those that know me I do push the envelope at times with a more middle of the road, guy in femme clothes looks. And I have had no problems being out like that.

kim
joe in a skirt

[Princess Chantal]

For me I don't give a damn about passing. I care about enjoying my venture to the fullest, wearing clothing that I want to wear, and portraying my favourite assests - sexy legs, taste of style, making people smile, and my friendly attitude. I don't give 2 bits if people see me as a male or female as long as I'm content with my dressing, I'd have accomplished my goal of crossdressing.

[Jenniferpl]

Have no desire to pass. The agreement with my is, I can do what ever I want as long as I do not go out in public.

[Jonianne]

I just want to enjoy wearing the cloths I like to wear. For me, spending so much energy trying to make my very male body "pass" would take away from the enjoyment of just being comfortable in my being.

Certainly, I try to dress appropiately, so as not to draw too much attention, but I would far rather others give me a pass (being accepting) than to try to "pass".

[Jaclyn NM]

Since I don't currently go out enfemme, this is only my opinion. If and when the time comes for me to go out, I would like to pass, mainly, mainly just to avoid the hassle. I don't really care what any strangers might think, but I wouldn't want to have a confrontation about it. I am a man who enjoys wearing female clothing, and if someday I choose to do it in public, I would like it to be uneventfull, that is for everyone but me.

[Deborah Jane]

Passing?
Nice idea, but as long as i can go out when i feel like it without attracting attention i,ll be happy.
Most of the time i,m quite content to stay indoors while i,m dressed up, because although i,ve been out a few times without anyone saying anything or pointing at me, i,m still very aware of what i really am....
A guy dressed up!!

Much as i,d like to be the real thing, i never will be!! :sad:

[Rachel Morley]

Define "passing". To me that term implies that all observers in all situations believe you are a GG. Probably less than 10% of us can achieve that. So my goal, rather than passing, is acceptance through looking and acting as femme as I can knowing that I will be read more often than not, at least up close. In other words, I don't care if I'm read as long as the reader accepts me in my presentation as a lady and treats me accordingly.

This is how I view "passing". I don't dress in skirts and dresses but otherwise present as a guy, but I do like to blurr the lines of gender expression and dress androgynously sometimes as a "girly boy". That's mostly because outside of work I never do "guy-guy" ... only "girly guy". However, IMHO you can't beat fully en femme! :)

[justmetoo]

For me it's not about "passing" or trying to appear female. It's about having more choices in clothing and other personal adornment. But I'm a very shy person and don't like to be the center of attention (or even the off-center of attention! :lol:). So for me the ideal would be to be treated the same as I am currently when I'm in drab.
Whatever I'm wearing I'm just me so I don't expect or necessarily want to be referred to by a female name or female pronouns (although I'm comfortable enough with who I am that it wouldn't bother me if someone did by mistake).

That's just me. Live and let live and to each their own. :D

[suchacutie]

My goal is for Tina to know who she is, be comfortable with herself, and to be a much a part of the feminine gender as possible. That includes not only all the physical clues, but the pyschological ones as well including thought patterns and organizational patterns. Tina really wants to know how my wife thinks, from the inside. I truly believe that I understand her so much better since Tina has arrived! My wife even asks opinions of Tina about things that my male self has already expounded. That's how separate we are becoming, and once we really feel comfortable that Tina really flows as a woman, I'm not sure if I will really care much about what anyone else thinks (barring making sure I'm physically safe from abuse).

I guess that's what everyone has been saying about accepting yourself, being yourself, and knowing yourself. I just wish it weren't such hard work!!! :)

tina

[Tasha McIntyre]

I never try to pass. I dont wear a wig or makeup, just love the girls clothes. My wife is quite understanding and accepting in that I can wear what I like as long as I don't go ut in public or alert the neighbors.

[docrobbysherry]

I believe if EVERY CD could appear to be an attractive GG, and also NOT be recognised by anyone who knows us, we would ALL GO OUT DRESSED!

However, the reality is that few of us can really pass. And many of us do not want to be made by someone we know, if we did go out.

That leaves the many TS/TGs that dress 24/7, and other CDs that either feel the need to go out and socialize, or feel the thrill of being out in public dressed.

For some of us, (that couldn't pass in a dark alley at midnite, and/or don't want our CDing found out for personal reasons), the desire to go out dressed may be missing! Considering all the negatives involved, I wouldn't consider going out dressed in public, unless it was a very special occasion.

Like meeting the girls in Hollywood for a wild nite on the town!:daydreaming:

[darla_g]

I wouldn't say I have NO interest, but passing doesn't mean much to me. I'll take 100 photos to get one good one I like, but that's just for my own vanity.

I have a GG friend who accepts this person in my head no matter how I'm dressed, and that is "passing" to me ten times more than any other situation I can come up with.i like what Ivy wrote and fully identify with this. (:heehee:Sorry Ivy I am so unoriginal)

[Jocelyn Renee]

I think passing is overrated. Just give me simple acceptance so I can go about my daily life in peace and I'm happy. Besides, sometimes passing can lead to unimagined consequences.

I have plenty of "flaws" that give me away during the day - muscular necks/shoulders/arms, Adam's Apple, and voice among them - but being 5'4" 120 lbs gives me quite a leg up in a dark club. Last year a friend approached my wife to let her know that numerous acquaintances had been buzzing about the fact that she was having a lesbian affair. Yep, they had seen her out with Jocelyn and assumed she was sneaking around on me. Ouch! We explained the situation to those who we knew about, but it makes me wonder how many other people out there are thinking the same thing. I'd much rather they know the truth than think Tonya is having an affair.

[Fiona Lindum]

I do not pass. I have been out and about sometimes wearing wig and makeup and sometimes without. I have had no bad comments from anyone and have been told by several women (age teens to 50's) that it is cool to see a male who is comfortable with whatever he is wearing.

:):)

[Emma England]

When younger, passing was important to me.

But now, after realising that I can not fool anyone, I just dress as I please.

I only hope that anyone who goes out wears respectable clothing, and not look like a hooker.

[Always Susan]

We're all different and all of us have different views on "passing" in pubic.
I for one enjoy the secert of wearing panties under my drabs or getting all dolled up at home. It makes me happy to be inwardly girly.:) To each there own.:love:

[Deanna2]

I'm just a guy - to be really truthful I'm more of a bloke - that just likes to wear a skirt - preferably a mini skirt. Not interested in 'passing'.

[keeganmeuer]

I really have no interest in passing at all. I'm more content to stay inside dressed by myself.

[Janetmichelle]

I don't think I would ever be able to pass being a rather large person. But I also don't consider myself asjustbeingamanin a dress. I always feel very femme dressed or not and for now I will be happy with just looking good to myself. If others don't like how I look that is their problem.

cheers
Janet

[tricia_uktv]

It changed me when I realised I could never totally pass. I now just try my best - and can do pretty much anything I want. Its brilliant!

[Karen__Starr]

I go out quite often with the understanding that blending in the best way possible from clothing to mannerisms will stay have someone maybe seeing me for who I really am. As others mentioned about 10 percent of us can pass easily and I know that is not me but will not let this stop me

[noname]

I don't try to pass either. I took on the mindset that women don't worry about wearing pants or a plaid shirt, why should I worry? Besides I know I have the support of ever GG out there. You know, cause they are all about equal rights. ( sarcasm )

[melissapghcd]

I really have no interest in passing at all. I'm more content to stay inside dressed by myself.

That's pretty much my position too. With that said, I prefer to dress fully with a wig, make up jewelry etc, if I can, but if I can't at the time I just dress in the clothes I like wearing and enjoy the time I have en fem.

[Alex!]

I aim to pass as a girl when dressing. I don't see the point otherwise. I'm not looking for a 10% experience or a 60% experience. I'm looking for a 100% experience, in so far as I can do that on a superficial level. I'm also not interested in causing a scene or starting debates on gender or sexual equality. Ironically, I prefer debating this and a ton of other issues in male mode, as I am more comfortable that way.

[DonnaLynn77]

My wish is definitely that I could pass, and I've had some compliments from both men and women when I've ventured out, but the most I think I can hope for is a double-take. "Wait, was that a dude?" LOL!

If I can fool them on first glance that is good enough for me, since I'm six feet tall and have sort of an athletic build. (i.e. broad shoulders)

Challenging the norm in terms of feminine beauty, that seems more fun than "passing". Who says you have to be a GG to be femininely beautiful?

My .02 anyway.

xo,
Donna

[tamarav]

It doesn't matter. You can interested in passing in public to the point that no one even sees you, or you can be completely happy wearing girly socks, we are all the same. We are special people that have an edge that is brought out by the feminine, period.

So, be happy with your level or style and love those that love you.

Your sis,

Tami

[Cary]

I couldn't pass if I tried. I have a face for radio.:sad: I have recently gone out dressed at night(whada rush). I'm getting bolder and bolder. For now I only dress in the house and underdress out in the world. I like buying clothes and shoes so much, that my closet runith over. My thinking is that why buy all these things and never go out into the world in them?:2c:

[MsJanessa]

Wow, aren't we all! I think that one problem in this thread is that we're forgetting the idea that "what matters is not who won or lost, but how you play the game".

For me, the point is not that I must pass, because that depends on the circumstances, the other person's powers of observation, whether the wind blows my wig off... The point is that I try to pass. And then if I fail, other people will (I hope) recognise that I'm a good tranny, one who tries 100%, who has self-respect, doesn't frighten the horses and makes life merrier for others.

One evening I was walking to a club meeting in Manchester and heard footsteps behind me in the dark. A Jamaican voice said: "Well, hello there honey, can I buy you a drink?" Without turning, I replied: "That's very kind of you, but I think you'd be disappointed," and I turned round. His mouth dropped open, he laughed, and wandered off chuckling to himself: "Oh Lord, yes I sure would have been disappointed..."

So, I tell myself, I can pass for a highly desirable woman - for ten seconds, viewed from behind, in the dark! Since then I've had other and better experiences, and some worse. Always aiming for the 100%. My record so far is 20 minutes.

Katie B

It's the "highly desirable" part of passing that's hard---the most passable CD I have ever met was not very attractive at all but very passable---short and overweight---looked like one of My maiden aunts I used to have when I was a kid---but she always passed in absolute any venue--unless she had to speak--for Me I would rather be a tall 6' beauty queen dressed to kill in leathers and silks--

[KateSpade83]

That I've shopped many times in drag, going to the women's washroom and fittting room without a scene, and even church - shows that I pass enough. Probably a 95% passing rate. But getting read can amuse people, get you kicked out of a fitting room, or have people laugh at you. So passing is very important to me when I go out. So I usually wear a skirt suit that makes me appear I have curves and that hides my muscular arms. And my passing rate greatly improved after buying an awesome $30 wig [shown in avatar].