Don't want to appear gay at party... possible?

[Ria]

Curious about your thoughts on this one.

Going to a Halloween Fetish Night Club. I'll be solo. I'll be wearing a trampy nurse outfit.

I don't plan on tucking and I'm thinking I will not attempt to act like a lady much at all. I would like to interact with the women as best I can. Is this possible?

I want to crossdress but I want to appear "straight" (cuz I am). I'm confident I can pull it off, have a good time and interact well but there is a part of me that wonders if my appearance could be a turn-off. "stay away from him, crossdresser"

Any of you had any experiences to share or thoughts?

[tamarav]

My thoughts:

You are worrying way too much about the perceptions of others. So what? Who cares if someone thinks you are gay? You are what you are, regardless of what someone may think. Be yourself, relax and have fun. Why not do the very best you can to look as good as possible for the party?

No need apologizing for doing a great job, go with it and have fun. Let them think what they want, you are happy.

Your sis,

Tami

[Shelly Preston]

Look the best you can and enjoy the party

Most will just assume you made the extra effort

[Holly]

Could not agree more with Tami... just be yourself. As for how others will relate to you, it's HALLOWEEN! If you are worried about being able to interact with women, don't. One year I went out dressed as a French Maid... couldn't keep the ladies away. Maybe you will find some other "trampy nurses" to compare notes with. Just go and have fun.

[Chari]

Always be comfortable in who you are, regardless of the outside packaging! Others will be at this gathering, maybe even more femme appearing than you. Go, enjoy, and take some pics!

[kimmy p]

Curious about your thoughts on this one.

Going to a Halloween Fetish Night Club. I'll be solo. I'll be wearing a trampy nurse outfit.

I don't plan on tucking and I'm thinking I will not attempt to act like a lady much at all. I would like to interact with the women as best I can. Is this possible?

I want to crossdress but I want to appear "straight" (cuz I am). I'm confident I can pull it off, have a good time and interact well but there is a part of me that wonders if my appearance could be a turn-off. "stay away from him, crossdresser"

Any of you had any experiences to share or thoughts?

Or conversely, you could find yourself a very curious lady who wants to experiment. :D:D:D After all as you said, it is a fetish club. If the ladies there didn't have alternate ideas of what fun and sexy means then they wouldn't be there.:spank:

[Kayla Shadows]

I agree,just be yourself.You are a crossdresser.Why worry about women who would say,"stay away from him, crossdresser",when theres a chance to find,"look,crossdresser..cool :) ".

Never change who you are.Id rather have people like me for me.The only appearance I care about is looking in mirror and being able to see ME...and not a version created just to fit in.

[Sherry-Stephanie]

What does dressing femme have to do with being perceived gay unless your trying to be lesbian....and being "gay" doesn't require dressing like a female either....I think your using two different terms here in a wrong context.....

[elusivebeauty]

Yeah, be yourself. Halloween is the easy day, nothing to really be afraid of, it's just jitters. It might take a couple of hours to get used to being in public, but you'll get the hang of it.

[Wendy me]

wow you spend way too much time thinking what people might think...... go have fun enjoy...................

[Deborah Jane]

You could wear this sweatshirt with your nurse,s outfit :D

72941

[Tracii G]

DJ I need that shirt, too funny.
Go have fun I'll bet you get hit on more than once by the ladies.:drink:

[LA CINDY LOVE]

You have way to many hang ups to go out dress and if you do go out I do not think you will have a good time, you will be worried about people looking at you to worried about people thinking you are a cross dresser to worried about people thinking you are gay........I just feel you are not ready to go out
until you work on yourself.


LA CINDY LOVE

[Brina Halloween]

My observation...if you want the ladies attention, do a job job of dressing and walking in the 4" heels. recommendations to get ladies to ask questions:
1. tuck, I've been asked how I appear flat several times.
2. Get breastforms with the nipple shape,Several ladies have asked how did I get the nipple shape (Bra was single layer fabric with tight t-shirt on top).
3. Wear at least 4" heels or wedges well. It is surprising how many ladies stick to low heel shoes.
4. If you have good legs, show them. "yours look better than mine"
5. Do at least decent on the make-up. I probably need a refresher since I don't usually do it.
6. Wear a good wig if you want good comments about it.

A good job gets attention.

Brina

[Jess_cd32]

If you go dressed fem and don't tuck then I would think that would attract a gay male into cd's to hit on you all the more, not to mention it would look kinda tacky, just my .02, no insult intended.

Just have a great time, if a guy hits on you just tell him your straight, plain and simple and don't have an attitude about it, sometimes just the simple thing of honesty really is the best.

[Nicole Erin]

Make sure you are pleasant and friendly, and yes there is a good chance the ladies might hit on you. I know I have been out en femme and the ladies would flirt with me.

And yeah on Halloween, if a man is CD'ed, people still don't suspect unless they had prior suspicions.

[Ria]

Some great words of encouragement! (from most of you) Many Thanks!

Keep in mind that YES I do have the "jitters" Big time! Make no mistake, this is my first time out.

I simply want to avoid making a dumb mistake that some of you may have learned from already!

Believe me, there is difference between a person who asks questions that seem insecure and doesn't act, and a person that asks the questions but works through them and follows through.

There is a gold mine of experience here. I just want to tap into it. If my questions seem of weak character, my appologies but I'm trying to extract insight from you based on your experience.

By the way! A couple of you gave me some great advice. I bought a $80 synthetic wig rather than a $8.00 costume wig. I went with a shorter wig close to my hair color. I have never looked so girlish before, and that's with no make-up. Can wait to get done-up for a dry run.

[Karren H]

Wear a button that says.... "I'm not Gay.. I'm just pretty"!! :D

You have the wrong hobby if your at all worried about what anyone thinks...

[Bernadina]

Hey, if this is the same Vancouver area that I live in and its a Halloween Fetish Night Club, no one and I mean no one will care what you are.

[icequeen]

I agree....it shouldn't matter what others think, just be yourself and have a great time. Be the most gorgeous one there if you want. Someone else said, most gay men don't go for guys dressed as girls....so that shouldn't be a problem.

[Bernadina]

...snip... Someone else said, most gay men don't go for guys dressed as girls....so that shouldn't be a problem.

I think that's true about gay men. I find its the women, especially the waitresses that seem to to want to be friendly and start touching when I'm out dressed.

[Marissa Mae]

I went out last weekend for the first time (non-halloween that is). The place we went was a gay bar, but they cater to anyone (AWESOME place :) ). Anyways, I was dressed pretty conservatively for a woman (jeans, flowy top, boots, wig). I had a few gay guys compliment me, I smiled, thanked them, and moved on, and that was it!!! For real, it was very civil, I didn't feel uncomfortable at all, and it actually made me smile like an idiot because they commented that I looked great :o

Get this: a while later, I was going to the bar, and a guy started talking to me. Eventually my gf made her way to the bar, and I introduced her. The guy put on an expression of disbelief, and said: "there is no way you are straight", to which I replied: "straight and proud, sorry". He turns to his friend and in a snide voice says: "he's straight"... he turns back and asks: "why do you dress like a woman and still be straight?", and I said: "it is what it is, and it feels great!" :heehee: Needless to say, his friend rolls his eyes at me, shakes his head, and says "we need to go, BYE", and they tromp off :)

So yeah, you may get both types of reaction, but just be your self, be honest, and you will be fine. Nothing will happen unless you want it to.

PS I came out of the bathroom once, and a GG looks me up and down and says: "DAMN, you are fu**** HOT!". I was caught off guard with that, but it made me smile. I thanked her, and again she is like: "No, really, I would totally ___________" (fill in the blank with your imagination) I had my gf there, so it stayed platonic :D

[Rachel Morley]

I'm thinking I will not attempt to act like a lady much at all. I would like to interact with the women as best I can. Is this possible?
When I was single, and went to parties dressed in any type of girl costume the girlier I was, the more the GG women seemed to come around me. Trust me, unless you are drop dead (Asian TG) passable, the GG women will read you as a guy. Don't worry about that. Will they think you are gay? ... maybe ... but then again, I have found many GG women have a "gay friend" and so are open to speaking with people who they may think are gay .... initially. It's up to you to subtly tell them that you are straight.

Like the others have said ... gay guys like ... well ... guys! It's "possible" that a guy guy will hit on you but in my personal experience it's the other T-girls you have to worry about (or not) as the case may be! LOL! :D

[Melora]

What situation are you talking about?
When with the Ladies.. Be Charming, and Nice.
With the Gents.. Be a "Guy", In a costume.
but while wit both, depending on the situation = ????, In your case. Are you gay or Het OR BI? Regardless of Costume though.. Be what you are! Be a guy with the Girls!
RIGHT? :)

[Barbra_in_Tulsa]

I agree that wearing some big heeled shoes with spark a lot of conversation with the women there....run with it, trust me. ;)

Also, try thinking about things in a different way. Some may think you are gay, like everyone else is saying, so what. But the up side, some women might find this disarming and you can engage and talk with them. There will be several other ice breakers to prompt conversations. But if and when the conversation comes up just be honest. If it's a fetish party no one will blink or be confused. Just use the Eddie Izzard line, I'm a male lesbian.

Cheers!

[Niya W]

Point blank. People are going to see you as a guy in a dress and have preconceived ideas no matter how you act. GO out and have fun.