Is there a plateau level(s) to CDing

[Sherry-Stephanie]

I've been doing the cding thing for over 6 months now....and it seems I'm at this level....where things have more or less smoothed or leveled off....

I have a number of if not all the things I need to maintain my dressing needs shoes, bras outfits make up ect....the acceptance level is now at "normal" with the wife as far as when how and whatever I do dressing...I cna dress whenever I want and to whatever degree I want and nothing is said no reaction ....my wife is so use to seeing my toenails painted that she doesn't think twice about it nor do I.

My dressing now seems as normal as my being dressed in male mode....

So is this the "normal" progression in CDing when SO's are present??....

I suspect that to move from this point in time would now require the next progression of "stepping out".....

What are your thoughts, commnets point of view here....especially if your well past the "6 months into...." level....

Thanks,

Steph

[Nadia-Maria]

I have been in the CD thing for more than 50 yrs, and still searching for the final plateau ...

[Karren H]

I'm hitting the half a century mark crossdressing too.... and I've reached a steady state where I'm enjoying what I'm doing... But I'm always striving to get better at what I love to do... So I don't know if I'm at a plateau or about ready or walk off a cliff!! Lol

[ColleenW]

Hi Sherry-Stephanie -

I think it is normal, that is to get to a level you're comfortable with and then level off. It's wonderful that your spouse is so accepting. :)

[AliciaWeb]

Only 6 months and on a plateau already. I spent years diving from peak to trough. I think going public helps finalise your attitude, it has for me.

[Parse Leeve]

I am on the - I just told my GF, who's supportive, and we're going to buy some make-up together soon - phase.

CDing is still new to me and I want to share it with her. At this point I don't know what the next phase would be.

[DeeDeeB]

I think it's normal to find your level of comfort and stay with it for a time. Many CDers never go out in public, nor does everyone want to transition. That's ok.

I don't think I'll get to the point where I don't want/need to shop for new dresses or shoes, but that's just a part of the level I'm at, and I enjoy shopping too much.

I've known I was a CD for 57 years, but spent most of that time in denial. :sad: But I feel much better now. :)

Dee :fairy1:

[Alice B]

I think I'm pretty much where you are with your dressing and the wife's acceptance. I think the only plateau is where you are comfortable with your dressing. It will be a different level for each individual. It's all in the individual acceptance.

[Nicole Erin]

So is this the "normal" progression in CDing when SO's are present??....

I suspect that to move from this point in time would now require the next progression of "stepping out".....

What are your thoughts, commnets point of view here....especially if your well past the "6 months into...." level....

Thanks,

Steph

I Been dressing for about 11 years, I mean full femme. So yes past the 6 month thing. It is normal for the wife to think nothing of it, provided she is accepting.

So yes you have probably reached a plateau. Here are some further challenges thast CDs sometimes take...

Stepping out.
Having an overall femme appearance even in drab [andro to femme clothes, hairstyle, eyebrows..]
Maybe working on your voice and other fine-tuning of your femme self, like how to walk properly.
Coming out to family and friends.
Getting in touch with your sensitive side and embracing it [Yes I know, barf city on what I just wrote, God help me...] :brolleyes:

Believe me, the challenges are never ending.

Where am I?
I have been out en femme.
Overall appearance is more-less feminine.
Family and most friends know [most friends are CD anyways.]
Working on the walk and presentation but need voice work.
Sensitive? Today on the way home from work while listening to Madonna's song "Take a bow" I started crying. [Yes barf city about getting all teary eyed over a song]

So ummm, time to start fine tuning and planning your attack on the world :D

[Ze xx]

I would have thought that if you have an accepting SO, then you probably will just find your own level, which will be different for everyone.

Since finding out about my SO, he had a brief period where he went a bit ott with buying stuff, as he was 'allowed' to, but he's kind of levelled off now and I think is comfortable where he is. :)

[Sam44]

I have to be careful because I tend to go way overboard with anything I get "into": work, music, landscaping the new house, whatever. I keep sober just because I know that I'd probably go overboard if I drank :)

Anyway, I have many bras that I'll not wear very often because I bought too many before I discovered the kind that feel the best. Similarly for panties, etc.

So, in some sense, my plateaus are when I discover my levels of comfort with each thing in my life.

[Sam-antha]

There is probably always a plateau around, whether it is the one I am on or the next one I have no idea. I do not even know if there is a next one.
Going out of the door as Sam and being in town is a big enough one. I have been on this one and varieties of it for some thirty years and that is long enough to have become acclimatised and unshocked by any further altitude changes.

~Samm

[PamelaTX]

[Yes barf city about getting all teary eyed over a song]

Huh? One of the best things about being transgendered is getting all teary eyed over songs!

(Excuse me, I've got to go put on some music ... )

[suzy cool]

I think there is a point reached where you are where you are supposed to be. There is a lot of talk about going out or expressing yourself in a particular way but when you look at it , it's actually that peer pressure thing.
It's easy to presume there is a heirarchy of achievement. You were quite happy finding out you aren't alone..next thing you need breast forms...next you need this and that. Then you never went out, or was that party girl in the great photos and so on so you think you should be so you push yourself.
And yet maybe you were quite happy already if you are doing what you want to do without restriction.

Having said that, I am not sure where it will stop. :eek:

[Tasha McIntyre]

Hi Sherry, this is a great topic. Thanks for posting it.

I've always loved dressing, but never done the make up thing, so I thought I was at the plateau.......until a month or so ago when I joined here. Seeing the boy / girl photos in the photo section here has given me a growing longing to push the boundaries a bit by learning makeup application and buying a wig.

Although my wife is Ok seeing me in girly clothing, I don't know how she'll cope with this new development. Time will tell.

[Toni_Lynn]

I wouldn't call it a plateau, but rather it become an agreement of acceptance with one's self. Then once that is set, we then can begin branching, just like the limbs of tree, as our CDing meshes like a fine set of gears into other areas of our lives.

I think that it can happen whether we have an SO or not, but when we do have a partner who accepts, its even greater, and the strength of love and enjoyment of life become as strong as two pieces of twine braided into a rope, a rope we can climb to higher things.

Huggles

Toni-Lynn

[Samantha Kelsey]

NO! You always want more.

[VeronicaMoonlit]

I've been doing the cding thing for over 6 months now....and it seems I'm at this level....where things have more or less smoothed or leveled off....
What are your thoughts, commnets point of view here....especially if your well past the "6 months into...." level....

Thanks,

Steph

6 months.... 6 months. Gee you're just a CDing toddler, compared to me.

Now though I identify currently as TS, I did I identify as CD for many many years, and technically what I currently do could be called "crossdressing". I've been doing it for 30 - 31....years. Been doing it long enough that it's hard to remember my early days back when I was 10 or 11.

Is there a plateau? I don't know, I think for some they might reach what they might think of a plateau, where they find a sense of balance. But there's no right way to be a CD, no rulebook, and there's a lot of diversity and variety amongst transfolk.

Veronica
Rondelle (Ron) Rogers Jr.

[Kate Simmons]

Not sure about CDing Hon but there is a plateau to becoming a real person. The lines become clearer with the level of understanding one has.:)

[Sherry-Stephanie]

What I mean here is you get into the CDing and then you progress to a point and level off...stay there for awhile...and then move up additionallly...then level off again.....and stay there for awhile and then move up some more.....

Now this is also dependant on how far one wants to take the CDing.....one might reach just the level where they do it at home totally closeted from their wife or SO and then it can range all the way up to doing it for many years and eventually reaching that level of being dressed 24/7....365...and totally out with it....without having surgery....

But with each "phase" does a certain leveling or plateauing take place before one progesses further?????

[Kate Simmons]

I'm thinking it has to do with comfort level mostly Sherry. I never considered any of it a level or plateau per se just a progression maybe? For instance when I was learning to hone my makeup skills I really sucked at nail polish and eye liner. I just started to take my time and do a better job. I think of it as mastering a certain CD skill. When something becomes second nature more or less, I guess it's up to the individual if they want to proceed further. In any case, I got to the point where I consider getting ready kind of natural and it's just a mattter of fact any more. That's quite an accomplishment considering what I look like when I start out as Rich and how it used to be. We pretty much set our own expectations and reach our own milestones in this way with not only the look but the progression as a person being the main goal.:)