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View Full Version : Contemplating an almost-was



battybattybats
10-11-2008, 11:45 PM
As it happened when I was tiny I really ahrdly ever thought about it till recently.

When I was quite small, before I was 5 but I don't recal exactly when, I developed a strangulated hernia of the testes. Emergency surgery was performed and everything ended up pretty much ok.

So I grew up knowing that my fertility and function of one teste might be effected by the damage done but I've never bothered to have my sperm-count tested and clearly my body's been producing testosterone fine (stupid beard, body hair and receding hairline dammit!) and I really hardly ever thought about it.

But it occured to me, what if the surgeon hadn't have been so skilled or they had taken longer to diagnose the problem? I never would have gone through a normal natural puberty!

I wonder what my parents would have decided to do at the time? Raise me as a girl maybe? Then would I eventually crossdress as a guy the way I do as a girl now?

How different my life might have been!

MentalMercury
10-11-2008, 11:55 PM
I don't mean to be mr. rain on the parade but they probably would have never considered raising you as a girl. I base that off of a clinical study where they tried to do the same thing and the (genetic) boy ended up killing himself over having male feelings and not being able to live it.. like many trans people.. I don't think any doctor would recommend that for that sort of reason.

battybattybats
10-12-2008, 12:20 AM
If your referring to the case I think you are, that guy died not so long ago. Until he reached puberty and rebelled against the identity they forced on him (not that he was ever happy with it) the whole incident was hailed in medical circles as a success. His death may not have had anything to do with what he went through too as he'd lived as a man for years by that time, depression ran in the family and a family member had recently committed suicide and such events often trigger it in others.

Back when I was a toddler thoughts on the subject were quite different and that experiment was yet to fail so horribly.

Also the practice still goes on every day today! Intersex children are 'normalised' constantly. Many they get right, many are gender-fluid and able to cope with being raised as either and some grow up seriously angry that they got surgically altered into the wrong sex.

Despite what happened to that poor guy, despite the thousands of Intersex surgeries they get wrong it is still a common practise the world over!

As for what my parents would have done in the late 70's/early 80's when faced with that situation who knows? They might have raised me as a girl, they might have continued to raise me as a boy which would have required a quite artificial puberty too.

Zenith
10-12-2008, 12:29 AM
Batty, you were fortunate that you were able to get emergency surgery and it went well...you could have died and the world wouldn't have you...I know you cheer me up quite a bit as a friend and I'd miss you...dealing with this gender thing is tough...I know...but your line of thought here...not sure...:thinking:

battybattybats
10-12-2008, 12:38 AM
Batty, you were fortunate that you were able to get emergency surgery and it went well...you could have died and the world wouldn't have you...I know you cheer me up quite a bit as a friend and I'd miss you...dealing with this gender thing is tough...I know...but your line of thought here...not sure...:thinking:

Good point!

And don't worry I'm not hung-up over what might have been. It's just something that I was surprised never really occured to me even on those times as a kid when I wished I'd wake up as a girl only to be fine with being a boy later on.

I think there's an alternate universe somewhere where a raised-as-a-girl Batty is on a crossdressing forum where s/he posts a lot of dressed-as-a-boy pics and is contemplating the same hypothetical possibilities lol.

Wenda
10-12-2008, 12:38 AM
Yikes! I have seen some very interesting shows on gender, but missed the one you are describing. Just be grateful to be who you are, where you are, when we are. w.

Zenith
10-12-2008, 12:44 AM
I think there's an alternate universe somewhere where a raised-as-a-girl Batty is on a crossdressing forum where s/he posts a lot of dressed-as-a-boy pics and is contemplating the same hypothetical possibilities lol.

Ahhhhhhh...hahahahahahahaha...the "Mirror Universe Saga" with Batty...lol...tell me though since you are good in this universe...would you be an evil female to male crossdresser there????
:confused:
:tongueout