Anyone going through.. the slide?

[Violetgray]

I should explain.

Up until recently everything was quite simple. I was a guy who likes to dress up. I wouln't go just anywhere dressed but I fairly often when out in public as Violet. As time passes, however, I find my femme self bleeding over more into my every day life. Things I'm doing now that I definitely wouldn't have done even 2 years ago include:


I now keep my eyebrows threaded
My glasses are women's
My nails are getting long enough to notice, especially since I keep clear polish on them
..and try as I might, I can't bring myself to cut them
Gettin called "ma'am" more when not in drag


I know that most of these things are unremarkable and many of you can say the same, and yet I feel a slow but definite shift in my behavior, and I wonder where it will take me.. when traveling on the gender train going from masculine to feminine, which stop will I finally get off at? I never plan, I just go where the current takes me, so its hard for me to navigate this one.. Anyone else in this situation, or has been? Where are you now?

[Zenith]

About 3 months into this and it doesn't feel like a slide so much as one of those rides at a water park...wheeeeeeeeee!...loving it so much........never want it to stop...
:twirl:

Oh yah...
1. Eyebrows plucked...
2. Epilate everywhere...
3. Considering laser hair removal...
4. First look at the JC Penny ad women's section in the Sunday paper instead of the Sears Craftsman or Best Buy...
5. Plan on sleeping in a nightie soon
6. Gonna paint my toenails pink...hope I don't have need of an EMT after that...:heehee:

[bimini1]

Hell I'm trying to fight the slide, go in the other direction. I just won't accept it. Can't accept it.

I am wrangling with it. It is madness to me:sad:

[docrobbysherry]

It is indeed a slippery slope we tread! I hope at the end of the ride, I don't suddenly find I'm drowning!:doh:

[GINA-CD]

As time passes, however, I find my femme self bleeding over more into my every day life. Things I'm doing now that I definitely wouldn't have done even 2 years ago include:

I now keep my eyebrows threaded



My eyebrows are also plucked so fem that sometimes I feel someone's going to say something about them (but hasn't happened so far)



... I feel a slow but definite shift in my behavior, and I wonder where it will take me..

When I'm not with people that know me, now I tend to act more feminine, more friendly (kind of gayish), and sometimes I even curl a little bit my eyelashes (although no mascara yet). I feel .... sexy doing this and think someone will notice someday. Don't know what I'll do next.

[nikitataylor0210]

It happened to me a bit, but then my boy side took over, and I ended up cutting my nails, I still keep my eyebrows fairly thinner than before but not that much.

Its good to slide, cause then you sort of figure out where you are in the bigger picture, I sort of swung back to where i started :)

[Niya W]

Some one put oil on my slide . The boy didnt even know what happened

[Sophie_C]

I think it's just the path of least resistance.

Don't tell me that you wouldn't be even more truly yourself if society wouldn't hold it against you...

[carolinewalker_2000]

Violet, I guess that, to some extent or other, what you are experiencing happens to all of us. For some it is more extreme than others, but as we all explore our feminine side more deeply, it is inevitable that some behaviour traits will bleed over. Go with the flow and enjoy!

[Kate Simmons]

I think a lot of it has to do with developing our full potential as an overall person Violet. Definately not a bad thing, believe me. It gives us a lot more freedom to be ourselves if we go with it.:)

[mykhelee]

I purged and did not dress for 8 months. I'm back at the top of the slide now, gonna enjoy the ride down. One our sisters told me the bright side of purging was a whole new wardrobe.:D

[RachelDenise]

I haven't started to slide but I am at the top of the slide looking down. I really want to ride but the family and work thing bring me back. At times I don't know if that is good or bad but it is what it is. Each day I try to find unnoticeable things to do but you can only do so much. Thanks for a good post Violet.

[Sally24]

I very much understand. One of the hardest things for me coming back to boy mode is cutting my nails. When they have gotten very long and have a really pretty polish on them it can take me hours before I force myself to clean and cut them.

3 years ago I thought this was just a curious part of my personality. Now I find that it is a much larger part of me than I ever suspected.

Things I wouldn't have expected I would do:
1. Pierced ears
2. Keep making eyebrows smaller and smaller.....
3. Having electrolysis to permanently remove my beard
4. Going "out" 2 or 3 times a month, sometimes 2 or 3 times a week!
5. Getting a whole circle of "girlfriends" that care about each other
6. Getting very concerned about skin texture, appearance, and scars!
7. Reducing my bikini area, even though no one else sees it!
8. Noticing my voice and hand movements changing in boy mode too
9. Keeping my legs and arms hairfree and hoping the laser fairy comes to my house

It all happens in little increments so it is not dramatic. I have a good idea where I'm going but I've been surprised before.......

[Teri Jean]

Having ears pierced.
Shaving arms cheast and legs.
Wearing mascra and nakeup around the house and nascra to work.
Changing my walk.
Pinky rings
Panties and bras under work clothes, sometimes nylons and garter belt.
The slide isn't so steep but it is an adventure none the less. I find my conversations has shifted to a more feminine nature with the women at work such as yeasturday. A friend had broke up with a guy she was seeing and I found I was relating as another woman and not a man. When the conversation shifted to cooking she said she should get me an apron and I responded with only if it was lace trimmed. I guess you could say the speed is picking up but it is still not a down hill bobsle. Hugs:-) Keli

[Gisele]

I've been on the slide fo some time now. In the past year I have been keeping my eyebrows plucked, Nail long and clear polish on them quite often. I have a regular girl "kim" who I see once every two weeks for my nails. She loves doing my nails. Last time she gave me a pedi she picked "that's hot pink" for my toes.

I have tossed out all guy undies. It's been 1 full year now for that.

I keep legs and bikini and armpits shaved. I use to keep fur on my face all of the time but for the past two years my face has been baby smooth.

My fiance said yesterday that we need to move to another state so I could go full time as Beth. :love: Sigh.......Wish we had the funds to allow us too.

[tamarav]

I totally agree Violet. The slide is covered with Teflon and someone keeps pouring oil on it. When you hit the bottom of the slide and think it is calming down you realize it is just the top of the very next steep slide. It never stops, it just becomes more intense.

Trust me... (and I don't say that lightly..)

Tami

[Sarah...]

Oh yes! I'm on that slide. My trouble is I know where I want it to end and I think I know where it will end - and those two places aren't the same. Furthermore each place has its advantages and disadvantages. I can't yet see if those places will ever meet, meanwhile I enjoy the ride.

Sarah...

[Violetgray]

Oh yes! I'm on that slide. My trouble is I know where I want it to end and I think I know where it will end - and those two places aren't the same.

This, to some extent is what I was getting at. At this rate, am I going to look up one-day and realize that I've gone full-time? The idea is frightening but also.. exciting? Is that the word? I imagine myself afloat in a barrel that is slowly drifting into the feminine ocean, but there's a subconscious sense of longing that prevents me from fighting the current and paddling back to the middle..

...if that makes sense.

[TommiTN]

This, to some extent is what I was getting at. At this rate, am I going to look up one-day and realize that I've gone full-time? The idea is frightening but also.. exciting? Is that the word? I imagine myself afloat in a barrel that is slowly drifting into the feminine ocean, but there's a subconscious sense of longing that prevents me from fighting the current and paddling back to the middle..

...if that makes sense.

Vi, it makes perfect sense. Since I resumed CDing a few months ago I find myself with the same longings. I has become much more difficult for me to reassume to my male persona. I just have no desire to go back to my boy self. This creates a difficult situation because of the culture where I live. I love the people here, but I know they would ostracize me if they knew. Thus I must drag myself kicking and screaming back to maleness. I hate it, but it is what it is.

[tommi]

Violet it depends on what your everyday life allows and if it allows it and are
you comfortable with it. My everyday life knocked me off the slide a year ago when I was going too fast .
For me it was more important to keep my family and I've accepted that.

[MJ]

I very much understand. One of the hardest things for me coming back to boy mode is cutting my nails. When they have gotten very long and have a really pretty polish on them it can take me hours before I force myself to clean and cut them.

3 years ago I thought this was just a curious part of my personality. Now I find that it is a much larger part of me than I ever suspected.

Things I wouldn't have expected I would do:
1. Pierced ears
2. Keep making eyebrows smaller and smaller.....
3. Having electrolysis to permanently remove my beard
4. Going "out" 2 or 3 times a month, sometimes 2 or 3 times a week!
5. Getting a whole circle of "girlfriends" that care about each other
6. Getting very concerned about skin texture, appearance, and scars!
7. Reducing my bikini area, even though no one else sees it!
8. Noticing my voice and hand movements changing in boy mode too
9. Keeping my legs and arms hairfree and hoping the laser fairy comes to my house

It all happens in little increments so it is not dramatic. I have a good idea where I'm going but I've been surprised before.......

this is so true and before you know it your a full time ts give it two years you'll see

[Angie G]

I do some of the same.
1 My own long hair.
2 nails longer with clear polish Mate finish color on the toes.
3 leg and underarms shaved.
4 Both ears pierced.
5 alway wearing girl pantie when not at work.:hugs:
Angie

[2b.Lauren]

After reading these replies, I see myself more on the steps. I am climbing up to get to my first slide. I am a few steps forward and then more back. For a long time I wore nothing at all. I had not purged, but just did not dress either. Then I began to buy more stuff, and started wearing panties, cami, and trouser socks most of the time to work and so on. Now I find myself thinking more about wanting to make a trek out dressed. I feel comfortable however and am enjoying the climb up, but the slide OH MY. We will just have to see!

Lauren

[Melani]

intergration. I am taking much better care of my skin, hair, weight and appearance in general. I use mens products mostly, "lab series" not cheap. Which is basically the same as womans skin care just formulated for a man. Have begun to upgrade my male clothing and how I dress in public as a guy. No more sweats and t's , I have to dress well even if it is to the grocery store. I have used my passion for all things feminie and applied to my everyday life. I think they call it "metro sexual". I haven't done any thing like shave my body hair, however I don't have much. I do keep my eyebrow trimmed. I do think I have alittle nature sway in my walk and thats cool. I don't think I will ever go as far as some of you ladies, maybe I shouldn't say never. I believe we all have our own path. The important thing is not deny or repress but do as you feel "and of course is safe". My biggest hope is that I can become a more sensitive, caring, open, loving and happy person. All the things we admire in women.(Even though they'll tell you they fall short as well). If I can attain even a small part of that than I will be complete. And isn't that we are all searching for to be complete within ourselves. For me being able to look my best whether as a guy or in femme has been a big step forward in my journy. I hope to take the best of both of me and make my self whole. In a nut shell be my true self. I don't expect to grow more feminie but just to be the person I should have become if I had not fought those early feeling I had as a child. For the first time in my life I no longer fear my future.

[battybattybats]

Me too.
Though my nails have been long for well over 10 years I keep them longer now, and instead of being black most of the time and occassionally bare they are rarely unpainted now and frequently in purple, silver and red along with the black.
My right ear is even now healing with the matching piercing to my one from last year.
Now I only grab male undies when all my panties are in the wash.

And if it wasn't for my CFS I'd shave more often too.

But I haven't lost my male side, though it has become a lot more regularly androgynous.

[VeronicaMoonlit]

Ahhh, the "slippery slope" which has been discussed on another board I read quite often. A trans acquaintance of mine who has written some very insightful things created an image of how she saw it:

http://www.grieve-smith.com/images/slippery050812.gif

It also involves such concepts as "gender euphoria" what some here call the "pink fog" and "experimentation changes you". Ahh, Andrea still keeps the principles up on her old page:

http://www.panix.com/~grvsmth/personal/tvprinciples.html

I've also wrote about what I called at that time "the lite body mods":
I said this:


Quote:
I realized that I didn't even think of the things I have done as body mods. But that is what they are. And I'm not for certain what to think about that. They just felt "right".


IT's hard to explain, but I'll try. The first thing I did, was grow out my hair, it looked incongrous when I was dressed, and I always wanted "pretty hair" This started in the early 90's just before I told my family. Which is why when I told my father he said, "So that's why you let your hair grow."

And once it was long, it was "me" it felt right to have it, that I was "meant" to have it.

Day to day life, I wear it in a high, snug ponytail. I often wear a mens baseball cap when out.

The next thing I started doing was keeping the body hair shaved even when I knew I wasn't going to be dressing. It just took extra time if I let it go between the times I dressed and liked being hair free. So I just kept it off, legs, chest, arms hands. And now it just feels "right" I like not having it.

The next thing was the pierced ears. All the nice earrings are for pierced ears and I'd read about people getting it done and not having any problems. So I went to claires (mall jewelry store) and had it done. I think the girl didn't do a good job because they were still bothering me when it was time to take the starters out. So I let them grow back in. Some months later I had them re-pierced at the local wal-mart, no trouble at all from that piercing.

I wear simple cheap studs day to day.

The next thing was letting my nails grow on ocassion and painting them clear or sheer pink on ocassion. It's not like they're acrylic nail or gel nail long, but they're on the longer side of short.

I started on the brows last year, and I try to keep them femme shaped with my Tweezerman's. And yeah, they look "right"

I also switched my men's digital with a smaler women's watch, it's a plain round bezel, with changeable bands, I also wear my Zoppini charm bracelet with Hello Kitty, black pump and pink triangle charms.

So there you have it, a sort of mini slippery slope of mini mods.


Someone responded thusly:


There are ramifications from all of this. The more you accommodate a "female" appearance into your daily life, i.e., nails, eyebrows, hair, laser, etc., the more you become aware - hopefully - of just how real those ramifications are.

So, yeah. Make sure you're thinking this through every day.


And I agree.

Veronica
Rondelle (Ron) Rogers Jr.

[Sarah...]

This, to some extent is what I was getting at. At this rate, am I going to look up one-day and realize that I've gone full-time? The idea is frightening but also.. exciting? Is that the word? I imagine myself afloat in a barrel that is slowly drifting into the feminine ocean, but there's a subconscious sense of longing that prevents me from fighting the current and paddling back to the middle..

...if that makes sense.

:heehee: Yes, that makes sense! I'm there with you.

Sarah...

[Deborah Jane]

I was on the slide before and got off, but this time i,m gonna keep on riding and see where it goes :daydreaming:

Coming through :battingeyelashes:

[Jonianne]

.......As time passes, however, I find my femme self bleeding over more into my every day life........


I don't dress nearly as much as many of you girls, but I do find myself on a gradual "slide" as well. But, I don't see it as a problem, I just see it as just being who I am and wanted to be all along. Maturing in a way. As I get older, I worry less about what other people might think, and that's a good thing. Oh, I still take into consideration those who I want to maintain a healthy relationship with, but I am finding out that I don't need to let what the world thinks, control every little aspect of my life.

[jennifer41356]

I am loving every moment of this "slide"...it is fun and exciting:love::drink:

[Raquel June]

I think there's a small group of us with very similar feelings/circumstances, like Violet, Zenith, some others.

If I could speculate...

I think we're mostly in our early 30s, single, and really laid back. We love being femme but don't hate being guys. We probably would rather have been born girls, but we can't do anything about that and we're not terribly driven to transition. We find ourselves becoming more and more femme, and that's really no big deal, except that we'd still like to be with a GG long-term and there aren't a lot of emotionally stable women looking for a guy with shaved legs and pink toenails.

So it's just something that's going where it's going. Who knows. Maybe I'll fall in love with a girl and start trying to act all manly again most of the time.


Veronica:

I totally know what you're talking about. I do many of the classic things to look femme, but they're not things that I do specifically to look more femme when I'm dressed up. I'm starting to get some of those crazy old man hairs in my eyebrows, and I totally hate that, so I keep my eyebrows kinda tidied up. I always loved longer hair and hated getting my hair cut. I always hated body hair and would freak out and rub nair all over myself now and then. I always wanted my ears pierced.

It could be a totally subconscious thing, but none of these are things that I ever wanted just to look more femme.

[Eve_WA]

The slide gets steeper the longer you stay on it! But you CAN get off. Its just hard when your enjoying the ride! I have been pursuing my feminine side for the last 10 years or so. For one reason or another, I chose to get off, and resume life as normal... only to discover myself back on the slide a few months later. I now feel that I have reached the apex, and the speed is really picking up fast!

I have already passed several milestones that I felt that I would never attain in my early years. longer hair, longer nails, thinned eyebrows, most body hair removed... and am considering the next ones... earrings, hair color, and permanent hair removal. Keep your whits about you, be mindful of your journey... and enjoy the ride!

Eve

[Vicki65]

We probably would rather have been born girls.

I'm not sure about that.

Personally, I'm glad I'm male, and I enjoy the privileges it brings. However, I wonder if we'd get such a 'kick' from our way of life if it had been the norm since we'd been born?

I know from the women I know, in their opinion, their clothes can be 'nice', or 'fashionable' or 'practical', but only occasionally overtly sexy. For me, their clothes are nearly always electrifying! Whether it be a pair of low rise skinny jeans (to them, practical), a long flowing denim dress (to them, comfortable) or a leg hugging pair of boots (to them, warm).

I come close to exploding just thinking about my long, belted denim dress and long black leather boots! I doubt I'd feel that way if I had been wearing them all my life.

[Raquel June]

Vicki65:

Well, I don't think you're one of the small group I was talking about that feels the same way I do. A sexual charge certainly isn't my motivation for dressing. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

[deja true]

I very much like this "slide" analogy and can relate to it greatly...but...

where I am on the slide i just don't know. It's still at a stage of not fully committing, I think, 'cos anything done so far can be undone, though I don't intend to. The joy of these "lite mods" is still a constant thrill.

But I can sense that sometime soon the slide will be racing through a dark tunnel and there might not be an opportunity to slow down or get off after that.

I hope...oh, lord, I hope that there is light and joy at the end of that tunnel and not more confusing twilite...

Thanks V for this marvelous and imaginative analogy. I'm one of those who often think in images rather than concepts and the images here, and how they can progress, are filling my mind with more images...many of them scary...but all of them vivid and stirring!

[Rachel Morley]

As time passes, however, I find my femme self bleeding over more into my every day life. Anyone else in this situation, or has been? Where are you now?
You better believe it girlfriend! If someone had told me 5 years ago that I would be doing the things I am now I would have told them they must be nuts ... I would never so that. Yet I did, and I am.

1) My entire body is kept hair free except for one small area (you know where)
2) I have had 9 sessions of laser facial hair removal.
3) I never lift weights anymore.
4) My eyebrows are kept plucked super thin all the time.
5) My nails are very long for a guy (and always have something on them - clear at work, color at weekends)
6) Both my ears are pierced and I wear gold stud earrings.
7) I minimally always wear a bra and panties (even at work) Outside of work I dress androgynously or girl mode)
8) I often wear eye liner and mascara in androgynous boy mode)
9) I've started wearing perfume and a woman's watch to work.
10) I never go out with "the guys" anymore. All my friends are GGs or CDers.

[battybattybats]

I think there's a small group of us with very similar feelings/circumstances, like Violet, Zenith, some others.

If I could speculate...

I think we're mostly in our early 30s, single, and really laid back. We love being femme but don't hate being guys. We probably would rather have been born girls, but we can't do anything about that and we're not terribly driven to transition. We find ourselves becoming more and more femme, and that's really no big deal, except that we'd still like to be with a GG long-term and there aren't a lot of emotionally stable women looking for a guy with shaved legs and pink toenails.

So it's just something that's going where it's going. Who knows. Maybe I'll fall in love with a girl and start trying to act all manly again most of the time.


Veronica, I think thats a pretty good gues... until you got to the pink toenails! How do you know my toenails are painted pink? Your spying on me aren't you! Now confesss, where's the camera? Cause if your watching me with a camera I want to look my best in front of it lol!

[Zenith]

... until you got to the pink toenails! How do you know my toenails are painted pink?

Say...didn't someone else say they were going to paint their toenails pink? :battingeyelashes: It's a glitter pink...they had it at Hot Topic me couldn't resist...I actually bought it in person...:heehee:

[Raquel June]

Revlon's got this glittery pink nail polish called Strawberry Sizzle. It's great. I usually put it on top of other stuff, though.

[Zenith]

Revlon's got this glittery pink nail polish called Strawberry Sizzle. It's great. I usually put it on top of other stuff, though.

Oh god we are sooooo hopeless...:heehee:

me guilty as charged...

:OT:

[VeronicaMoonlit]

I think there's a small group of us with very similar feelings/circumstances,
If I could speculate...

I think we're mostly in our early 30s, single, and really laid back. We love being femme but don't hate being guys. We probably would rather have been born girls, but we can't do anything about that and we're not terribly driven to transition. We find ourselves becoming more and more femme, and that's really no big deal, except that we'd still like to be with a GG long-term and there aren't a lot of emotionally stable women looking for a guy with shaved legs and pink toenails.

So it's just something that's going where it's going.

So very very insightful. On another board that I frequent, we have a word for "your group": "the middle path". And have had many discussions about it. It was once defined this way:


I specifically mean people who, on one end, do not self-identify as transsexual. (Folks in denial are, of course, always welcome!) On the other end, I mean a degree of presenting as the opposite gender that is a more fundamental component of your identity than an occasional round of dressup at home or confined to purely erotic fun.

And it was defined like this once:



Middle paths -- Complicated because it encompasses (at least?) three groups:

- Those who want to socially transition but can't due to external constraints (financial, geographical, etc.)

- Those who might desire to socially transition, but decide not to because other factors in their lives (e.g. a desire to preserve a relationship) are more important to them

- Those who don't seek to transition but want a life that involves being in-between, or beyond, or alternating between genders. (Implies a public aspect to one's cross-gender/gender blurring presentation, rather than solitary crossdressing/gender-bending.)


The middle path can be hard I think, people like the binary. And relationships can be difficult. And sometimes a middle pather decides they really do want to transition, like I did and like some other self avowed middle pathers did on that other board. But I do feel kinship with you all, though I'm a some years older (41).



I totally know what you're talking about. I do many of the classic things to look femme, but they're not things that I do specifically to look more femme when I'm dressed up. ......
It could be a totally subconscious thing, but none of these are things that I ever wanted just to look more femme.

Ah, very interesting.

Veronica
Rondelle (Ron) Rogers Jr.

[2b.Lauren]

I would classify myself as that middle path person at age 43. Like many on this path it has long since stopped being sexual for me, it a a part of my overall personality. I prefer flats to heels any day, and just enjoy simple opportunities to dress, wearing very simple attire (dress, skirt, blouse, top, or sweater). Shaving has become a part of my routine, and fortunately I am not a very hairy person. I agree with the concept of rather being born a girl, it would match quite well with my moods and overall personality. Yet for me I guess again I am the late bloomer. I just recently began to explore dressing again, and increasing my female wardrobe. I am closer to moving out of my closet than ever in my life, which I feel identifies me closer to the slide than I have ever been in my life. Like most I am not sure where I am going, but am so much more accepting and supportive of myself now than ever before.

Lauren

[jessica_jmt]

my slide is over! wife said she cant accept me anymore?
so one last trip down to the very end!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Samantha Kelsey]

I thought I saw the bottom of my slide but realised it was just a bend, beyond that it goes as far as the eye can see.
Just like life really.

[Vicki65]

Vicki65:

Well, I don't think you're one of the small group I was talking about that feels the same way I do. A sexual charge certainly isn't my motivation for dressing. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

I'm not sure I came across correctly there, but you raise an interesting point. I dont dress purely for the sexual charge. Often it is part of it, but also as often, I dress and simply carry on with life (at home only, I'm not 'out' aside from with my wife).

I doubt anyone here can say there is NOTHING sexual in their reasons for dressing, or do some people not see ANYTHING sensual in dressing as a woman?

Lets face it, back to basics, women dress / make-up etc to be attractive. Its been the way since time began. It cannot be denied - else why do female clothes attempt to accentuate the female form, whereas mens rarely do? I'm thinking of low cut tops, tight skirts, push up bras, heels etc etc etc.

Please nobody take offence, but your last sentence gave me a giggle :hugs:

This is a forum for men who wear dresses - not that there's anything wrong with that either :heehee:

[Rachaelb64]

I think I'm on top of the slide, looking down wondering whether I should jump?

Life just likes throwing the odd woobble now and then :)

[Sam-antha]

The nice thing about this slide is that one does not have to jump. It is not even necessary to let go, just ride it. Then we go where we it takes us, remembering our other responsibilities.
Personnaly I have been on it a very long time and it is a wonderful ride that we are all enjoying whether we know it or not.
But it is true that it does steepen at times
~Samm

[marny]

It's only happenned a few times, but I love it when someone addresses me as Maam! :D

[crusadergirl]

I went though that awhile back almost 2 monthes ago. I really enjoyed using that side of me and then i just stopped it all together. Its hard to be something you feel you shouldn't be.

[briannad]

I love reading this thread! Thanks Violet for starting it. My being on the slide is just something I finally had to "man up" :heehee: and enjoy. I just decided to quit denying myself the things that bring me joy, and being on the slide has done wonders for me.
-Almost done with laser and electrolysis (gray hair) and I can't wait
-I never had much body hair, now I don't have any except a patch thanks to my epilator and razor
-Going to work the eyebrows next, got to figure a good look when I am in my airline uniform
-Painted toes, slightly longer nails
-Pierced ears coming down the road

This has become a fun journey and I know that since I accepted this part of me, I am more relaxed and fun to be around. I know where the slide is taking me, it will be interesting to see the reaction of friends and family when I step off at the bottom of it.

Just my .02 cents :o

[Raquel June]

I doubt anyone here can say there is NOTHING sexual in their reasons for dressing, or do some people not see ANYTHING sensual in dressing as a woman?

Lets face it, back to basics, women dress / make-up etc to be attractive.

Very true. There's quite a spectrum. Some people get a huge sexual thrill out of it and would never identify as transgendered. Some people are very transgendered and would never say that it was a turn-on for them. Certainly most of us are somewhere in the middle.

I have nothing bad to say about the people who do totally sexualize it, except that I'm horribly offended by them being impolite to me at a club as they often are -- as though they think that since I'm dressed like I am I must share their feelings and be a total pervert.

A lot of people use crossdressing as a sexual outlet that amps them up then years later it becomes more of a zen-like thing that calms them down. I know I got into my mom's stuff when I was very young, like 3 to 6, and that was certainly not sexual, but every time I got into my mom's or GF's stuff from about 10 till 20 (which wasn't often) it was a huge turn-on. Now it's much less like that, but there's certainly excitement to feeling attractive and feminine.

The people who fascinate me the most are the Tri-Ess crowd who claim they are not at all transgendered but also claim that they aren't turned on by it. If that's the case, they sure have picked an interesting hobby!

[Vicki65]

I guess I'm somewhere in the middle ground then. There is a sexual aspect to it for me, and I do feel sexy when dressed, but I'm not at all attracted to other CDers - nor would I dream of suggesting they are perverts. If they are, I must be - and I dont regard myself as such.

However, I also get the 'zen-like' feeling which is hard to describe, but might be put across as a deeply relaxing peace and oneness?

How would you define transgendered? Simplistically I think its thought of as a physical thing, but I guess as with everything there are numerous shades of grey along the way. I wouldn't regard myself as transgendered how I understand it, but I would describe myself as a sensitive man. I am quite attuned to others feelings, which is generally regarded as a female trait. However, I have no wish to have a more female body from more than a curiosity, short term thing of what it would be like to have boobs :D. I have no drive to change my body, though I do feel driven to CD.

As others have said, what an interseting thread...:thumbsup:

[Raquel June]

... I'm not at all attracted to other CDers - nor would I dream of suggesting they are perverts. If they are, I must be - and I dont regard myself as such.

When I said pervert I was talking about several CDs I've met who are always hooking up on Craig's List, who make unwelcome sexual advances, who say things to me like, "When are you gonna make a woman out of me?" and other things that I'm not going to mention.

Most would say transgender means you don't identify with your birth gender. I think people disagree more about how strongly you have to feel about it. For a M2F, simply not conforming to male roles could be seen as transgendered, but many would say it has to be a little more serious than that.

[Vicki65]

For a M2F, simply not conforming to male roles could be seen as transgendered, but many would say it has to be a little more serious than that.


OK... based on that, I'm still way left of centre. I still conform to most male roles - and TBH cant see that changing. Life is interesting... :)

[LA CINDY LOVE]

WOW that is what is happening to me, when Cindy can home form a night on the town I would STRIP Cindy down to NOTHING, Cindy was no were to be found,

But lately I have been leaving Tracie's of Cindy, like I would keep my toe nails panted let my finger nails grown longer and keep clear polish on them then as time passed I got my other ear pierced I keep my eye brows trimmed and I would only keep a SIX O CLOCK and if it got pass that then it was time to shave and I made sure that there was no body hair ......I did not have that much any way.

I was out at dinners with a friend who is a CD and my daughter we both were in drab and the lady said can I take your order mama, well my little girl said that is daddy but I said nothing when she left I ask my Friend did she call me mama and my friend said yes.......but I do not know how you do have a little 6 o clock but i think it is your hair....... I have long dread locks to my lower back .........but I did like it when she called me mama.

The reason I feel I am like this is for Cindy, I want to be ready for Cindy in case she wants to go out......I may be dress in drab but .....I am all aways in Cindy mode.


LA CINDY LOVE

[RobertaFermina]

Nope, seems like I'm in a Hot-Air Baloon.
Circumstance puts it that way....
Want to dress, and seems sensible not to, for a while.
Looking forward to Halloween, though !

:rose: Roberta :rose: