Transitioning

[Suzy Harrison]

In about 6 months I intend to go full time declare my position at work..

Already I can count 15 friends; family and close work colleagues that know. All of those 15 have been very supportive, which was something I didn’t expect.. All but 2 of the 15 are female – I think generally females will prove to be more supportive than males.

I wonder if I’ve just been lucky so far with the positive reactions and maybe I might not fair so well in the future.

For those of you who have come out to work colleagues and friends, can you tell me if you had many negative feelings regarding your transition?

Did you also find that females where more understanding? – and what was the worst reaction, if any, you've had?

[Sara Violet]

Yes, I find females are more supportive than males. I never had a bad experience with anyone who I knew beforehand, except for family. Some guys who find out though tend to be very distant, almost cold.

That said I was never very masculine, so it was not too surprising.

Where I live, most every one is excepting. I have had some customers, and strangers out in public make comments behind my back. Good thing is once you pass, those comments stop.

The most negative reaction I had was from my boss at the time. She did not understand why , since I liked video games and other "guy" stuff. Now she is my best and only close friend. So even if you have a not so good reaction, remember as you change, people do to.

[Nicki B]

What do you do for a living, Suzy?

One of the key things that people I've known do when transitioning is to get their management (and particularly HR) involved early and on their side - if you can carry them with you, it then minimises any problems in the workplace?

Top down leadership helps everybody deal with a transition smoothly.. :)

[carolinoakland]

I have been slowly getting more andro at work, I'm fortunate that the attire for women is almost identical for women. Except in some corporate situations, but hey a lot of women wear mens suit jackets too. I've also been wearing light make up for about a month at work. But the full time thing, well, I feel that five o'clock shadow and eye shadow don't mix. And until I've had significant hair removal done, and been on hormones that I can spend the time working out the details with my union management on an implementation plan, I think I get to be the trailblazer again. Read the coming out at work section at TS Road Map, it's a great resource. Carol

[Zenith]

...The most negative reaction I had was from my boss at the time. She did not understand why , since I liked video games and other "guy" stuff...

Hey...have you seen "Grandma Hardcore (gamer)...70 year old female that is a total gamer...transitioning doesn't mean you can't game...

:hugs:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6O4VedQYZB0

[Steph Butterfield]

Yes Suzy,

Yes you are lucky, but I am pleased for you.

I lost all my family, all my friends 99% of my nieghbourhood, and cannot get a job.


Steph

[Suzy Harrison]

What do you do for a living, Suzy?

One of the key things that people I've known do when transitioning is to get their management (and particularly HR) involved early and on their side - if you can carry them with you, it then minimises any problems in the workplace?

Top down leadership helps everybody deal with a transition smoothly.. :)



Hi Nicki
I work for a medical company as a field rep. Basically I visit hospitals and sort out their technical problems - and so 95% of people I interact with are female (nurses and female managers in those hospitals)

The HR Director at work knows all about my plans and fully supports me. We've even gone out for dinner together - as females of course. But at the end of the day she won't be able to stop some people having negative thoughts on what I'm about to do.

[Nicki B]

No one can stop people thinking.. But clear leadership will show what behaviour is acceptable and what isn't? :)

You sound as if you are very well placed.