Desperate. Help!

[natalieg]

Hey girls. I just feel like I needed to come here to write something. I've been having this fantasy that won't go away, I want to dress up and explore my feminine side. I want to be the pretty girl I can see myself as but I'm afraid to do it. The economy sucks so I'd be spending a lot of money on clothes and make-up then I'd like to, and if I ever did I'm sure my family or friends would find out. I have no clue what to do and I'm going crazy because I'm not able to be the girl I wish to be... Any suggestions on what I could do?

[tamarav]

Welcome!

Take a deep breath and calm down, you are among your sisters, any one of us could have written that same statement. You will find that as time goes on you become less frantic and will iron out some of the kinks and start looking like you want to look. It just takes time and some funds.

Keep working at it and get all the advice you can and you will do great.

Your new sis,

Tami

[Karren H]

Well if your worried about the costs... and the impact on your family and friends... I suggest you find a new hobby!! maybe bank robbing or secret agent... because this isn't an easy life and it isn't a cheap life and your family will find out it's only a matter of time...

So if that doesn't scare the begibbies out of you then welcome to the club.!! lol

ps... give Tami a call and she can set you up with everything you need... Wholesale!!! lol She's going to kill me for that,,, :D

[Brina Halloween]

Well, I wasn't too worried about money, so when I jumped in, I simply bought what I wanted. In your situation, look around the site. Your not the only one on a budget.

Good Will / Salvation Army / thrift / consignment stores can be a good source of clothing. There are definitely gems there and since I suspect most ladies wear stuff multiple seasons, style is not everything. If going public, be aware of the areas you need to cover when choosing clothing.

Make-up can be all over the board on cost. Most ladies don't buy their cosmetics at high-end stores. I did that one year...then I read you don't want to keep it forever. A dollar store might be all you need to start, especially if in the "closet".

Achieving shape does not require silicone. Their are threads about bird seed, balloons, cleavage creation on here already. Just start searching.

Read the permanent threads in the tops of the sections, they have some of the most common things well covered. Tamaray has a lot of information in her website too. I've read there a couple times.

Wigs if needed can be had at reasonable price online but. Halloween is over for this year :sad: Since ladies hair length covers the range, presentation does not necessarily require one.

Make sure that you enjoy yourself. Make a few friends. and I am sure you will get a whole bunch more advice here.

Brina

[MJ]

OR you could just find a dressing service in your area and go see them first.

[Lisa Catherine]

katsdreamboutique.com has been a regular source for my wardrobe, and it's been very good budgetwise!! There are a lot of sources out there, and you're now among sisters!!:hugs:

[Crystal Galadriel]

I am most certainly on a budget myself. Just yesterday, I had $20 to my name! Thank God for paychecks.

I've been trying to get out of the money hole for a while and am just now starting to get back up beginning with this paycheck and the next one, but I'm afraid that Christmas is going to suck it all back out of me again. I bought my first stuff back in early October, and it's been nearly 2 months since then and I haven't been able to buy a single thing. All I can say is, if you really want to do this, just be patient and don't worry about the money too much. You don't have to get it all at once, you can spread it out as you have money to spend.

I was caught by my parents as I was starting, they were very disapproving and as far as they know I have stopped (obviously, I haven't). I'm now living in a dorm room with a guy I met in August and I still manage to do some dressing. Just have to pick the right times to get your fix, when you know you're going to be alone, like at night.

The best I can tell you is, if you really feel strongly about this, don't be afraid to start. If you're afraid of what others will think, don't worry, we've all been there. Just take your time and try to be comfortable with yourself. If you can't accept who you are, you can't expect anyone else to.

Wish you all the best, and good luck.

[Jilmac]

My suggestion is to start slow. You don't have to buy top of the line clothes for your first foray into crossdressing. There are plenty of clothes to try on at Goodwill or another thrift store, and that includes lingerie so you can buy what you want at a fairly cheap price. Also look for sale prices or coupons on makeup brands and just buy the basics until you know how to use it and what looks best on you. Good luck in your femization and please let us know how you are progerssing. :2c:

[docrobbysherry]

at the beginning!

ALL of us started CDing in a simple manner. Often, with just one item of ladies wear. Sometimes, even that was borrowed!:doh:

U don't need to start with 4 pieces of foundation ware, corset, silicone forms, ball gowns, 6" heeled boots, 10 wigs, a large makeup bag, etc..:eek:

Try out things one at a time. Find out what u enjoy and what u'd like to try next! Find out what makes u FEEL good, and what makes u LOOK good!

U mite just start with some panties, nylons, and maybe a cheap bra, with sox stuffed in it! :D

Take your time! Enjoy the adventure as it unfolds for U!:)

[Maxi]

Welcome,
Just start out with one piece at a time and soon you will have plenty of clothes.

[Alice Torn]

My only wig is from a second hand store. My first times out, once all day, my "breasts" or bust, was a roll of paper towells placed inside my dress!

[Jessicaparkson]

Welcome! As the lovely ladies here have said, start slow. The most important thing is to enjoy it!

[catriona36]

one word


EBAY :)

[Shelly67]

This will sound a little strange , but I,d try this ....... go for a long walk , try to do anything at this time to burn off the angst and calm down .
Grab some air , take time , stop the reflection I think you are torturing yourself with.
I can only give my comment as youre situation has a slight likeness to mine , all those months ago.
Like you I was at a point where the realization of my true self was at conflict with my moral judgement , I was in bits , even denial at times .
since then , I,ve accepted me , and Shelly my female side . I,ve had to give in to her - sometimes she,s crying to emerge , sometimes she goes away ..... to be honest the desire for her to pop into the ether is so evident when stress is high ....... so try not to be so stressful on yourself my friend ....its only you coming to terms with you . Try to learn to enjoy youre relative space , revell in youre honesty and you,ll enjoy the calmness that,ll result.
It seems as though folks like us , new and scared to our situation , we really beat ourselves up in the begining.
As for dressing , well yes in the current climate where money is tight , I,d shop online for make up and hair pieces only , and charity shops for clothes . If you find it hard to enter any shops for clothing , then perhaps visit a nearby town outside of recognition and fear of ( a newbie ) being discovered and rebuked . On the clothing front , go for something plain , in a plus size if the need ......or better still , ask any of the more experienced girls on here for advice , as I havent a clue to youre tastes. I think in short , you,ve done the very best thing you could have so far - come here for advise . i wish you well , hope you,ll understand a little of my rambling and found some of it to be a little helpful in youre uncertain times.......but please realize - it will pass . the first real step I ever took was to wear a nightdress and lipstick ....alone of course , the reality of it all hit me and took my breath away .....I felt as tho I,d come home ....it was weird . That was some time ago , but , that one moment made me realize this lifestyle was me and was never going to go away .....I had , ( like every other girl on here ) to deal with it .........
Good luck - remember - your not alone xx

[Sophie]

I'm with MJ!

Find a dressing service within range and visit them. YOu'll be able to get made up, try on different outfits, see what suits and what doesn't. Plus, you can leave there as you came in and no one will ever know! BRILL!!

Let us know what kind of area you're in and i'm sure there'll be loads of suggestions as to where is good to go.

Sophie

[trisha59]

Go slow. You do not need to get the complete CDers make over kit all at once. Most of us started with a single item. Its like stamp collecting you don't start with a complete collection rather you go out and get stamps one at a time. Explore the thrift stores lots of items at low prices. Sometimes our local Goodwill has bags of nylons packaged for sewing projects. You can geta garbage bag full for $5.00. Just remember to wash them. Thrift stores do not wash their donations.

[Sally2005]

Find a girl friend who will help you. Then go to her house to dress and borrow her clothes and get her hand-me-downs. Otherwise, thrift stores and for makeup suck up your pride and go get your foundation and ask for help in the store so that you only have to buy it once!...then get the cheapest lipstick, eyeshadow etc. Besides that, if you are so tight on cash, you should be finding a way to earn more of it or reducing other expenses. Get a part time job in a clothing/thrift store and maybe you get both money and clothes.

[Cathytg]

Yep, take a walk or have a drink. You are fine. You are not sick; you are not crazy. You are simply in a gender spot that seems all wrong to you. It isn't.

Take the advice given here about clothes. But do stay in the closet until you get comfortable with the image that you will create. Then get out into the world.