Finding out you were a crossdresser

[CrossJess]

I’m just interesting knowing how everyone here found out they had girly tendencies and the lust for dressing up girly.

LOL well I’ve always been a bit or girly girl inside if I’m truthfully honest, I’ve always felt like half boy half girl which I think I is a good thing, anyway I’ve never dressed up in woman’s clothing before in fact never, I had no urge to what to do that, it wasn’t until I went to an 80s disco 6 months ago where every man had to dress up as a woman and the women visa versa, that night I felt very comfortable in what I was wearing and it was lovely to feel different, plus the fact that peeps thought I looked very convincing, so this has kick started a new adventure me, my GF seems to be happy that I’m exploring this to lol I wondered how she would react when I said “I quite like wearing woman’s clothes” but she’s extremely girly girly and said “that’s so cute and I can nick you stuff then” lol

[trisha59]

I guess I got a pretty good idea that I was CDer when my father caught me in my sisters underwear when I was 7.

[Sara Jessica]

How do you find out when you're like four years old??? As a child, I just knew things weren't quite right. I guess that's part of the reason I consider myself more tg/ts than cd.

[mackemlass]

Same here,around seven when I started wearing my Mum's hose and 'playing dress-up' with her knee-high boots-well at least that's what she thought I was doing.

[Karren H]

I can't remember that many decades back as to how I felt.... It's just always been the way it is....

[StaceyJane]

I was wearing my mom's clothes long before I heard of the word crossdresser.

[billie earls]

I started went I was around 4 and I knew it was something odd about it, but didn't know why. As I got older I realized there was a stigma attached to what I was doing, so I never let anyone know. I never knew there was a name for what I was doing until I was an adult and even though I have at times not crossdressed it was always there and I just tried to ignore the urge.
Being called a sissy was always a way to get beat up so it was always the macho thing for me. Although I took this persona I was and still am a friend to those who were picked on or teased.

[Carole Cross]

I have known that I was different since the age of three when I put on one of my sisters skirt suits, she was five at the time so it fiited like a glove. Ever since then I have always wanted to dress up even though I tried to supress it. The urge always came bacK eventually and now its back with a vengeance!:brolleyes:

[brookalicious]

I was in the 3rd grade and constantly thought about being a girl... throughout my life it was part of my fantasies. I only started dressing recently though...

[Sam-antha]

Does anyone really believe that I could possibly remember that. Like all good things, it happened, to me.
~Samm

[tamarav]

Way back before the Internet, much less modern computers, I realized something was different. I wasn't like the other little boys and I never have been.

Took years of denial and reading and such to understand, I am just like everyone here!

Your sis,

Tami

[BuffyCD]

I had the same feelings as many of you....something just didn't feel right...
I was lucky enough to grow up with the internet, so I found some good sites with information that at least let me know I wasn't the only one!

-B.

[Lilith Moon]

How do you find out when you're like four years old??? As a child, I just knew things weren't quite right. I guess that's part of the reason I consider myself more tg/ts than cd.

For me that was simple...at 4 YO I used bedsheets to make my dresses :battingeyelashes: Of course, I also knew that I was "different" from the other little boys.

[sometimes_miss]

All I knew at first was that I wasn't 'normal'. I was told that I was supposed to be a girl by my abuser, and at such a young age didn't have the resources to question his statement. So, I just gravitated towards wearing female clothing in private because I thought that was what I was supposed to do. Prayers unanswered, I lost my faith. As an older teen, I gradually realized it was more something attached to dressing up, not necessarily a sexual identity / orientation problem so much. When I realized there wasn't necessarily a sexual connection to it, I just identified as a crossdresser. That was over 30 years ago. Not much has changed.

[Rita D]

I started with slips at about age 4. For many they were the only garment I wore... Told myself I had a slip fetish. One day in my 20's I looked in the mirror and the girl looking back at me was wearing a slip, pantyhose, bra, heels, and lipstick. I could deny it no longer...

Rita D

[Kendra (Tx)]

I always knew I was "different"...:confused: But I never knew "what" I was..I was just enjoying myself rummaging and finding some of Moms pretty things and trying them on...Didn't know why, I just knew I loved feeling and being pretty...Then one night ( when I was about 11 ) I was up late watching the TV..( no pun here, :D ) When I flipped the channel to the old "Tomorrow Show" with Tom Snyder.. ( Yes...Im dating myself here. ) and he had as a guest on the show, Virginia Prince.. A "male who loved to wear womens clothes"...A Crossdresser...This had my full attention...:hypnotized: At last I have a name for what I was...Virginia was an "older" lady, but I remember thinking "wow...I wish I could be like her"...Little did I know...I would be...That night long, long ago...I found out I was a CD...( at least I knew what I loved doing was called..) Thank you Tom Snyder and Virginia Prince for allowing me to find out what, ( and more importantly) WHO I am...:battingeyelashes:

http://kendra954.com

[gennee]

I have always felt that I was different. Didn't know I was a cross dresser until 3 1/2 years ago. Been doing ever since. Life has never been happier.

Gennee

:daydreaming::)

[geri-tg.]

I can't remember that far back.I was told it was bad that I needed help. That thought stayed with me for many years.:sad:

[Toni_Lynn]

I had no clue! I just wanted to wear what girls wore, and so when I was 13 and bought my first bra and panties it was out of total innocence. I knew nothing about sex, whether it be gay or straight in mature, and certainly nothing about any associated practices. I did know that I liked girls -- ooooh -- they were heavenly!

And then I read Dr David Ruben's horrid book 'Everything You always Want to Know About Sex'. That book did more damage to my thinking than it did good! His lurid description of guys dressed as women to pick up up guys, totally confused me and set me off on a thought pattern that I was gay. Being the thoughtful person I was I realised after a month that I was not and that I loved girls!

But by that time I knew what I was and about the 'birds and the bees'.

Huggles

Toni-Lynn

[hma575]

i have to admit i was young when i slipped into a dress:love:it felt so good at the time that i got so much pleasure from that i knew i could enjoy this so much,as time progressed i was in and out of this for sometime as i grew up,then one day i realized that its all to short not to enjoy something you could ever enjoy :battingeyelashes: so i tried this more often and still enjoy as of present so keep on enjoying yourself for you do only pass this way once:daydreaming:

[Kimberly Marie Kelly]

I started wearing my moms bra and panties in my early teens and sort of knew that I preferred them. As I got older I would buy panties from stores and wear them, but it wasn't till my early 20's that I wanted to wear more outwardly feminine clothe's. I knew very early on that I was more women than man. Now I'm single and can't stop dressing. :battingeyelashes:

[Cathytg]

Now, that's an interesting question. It was one thing to know I was different from the other boys and quite another to know that I was a crossdresser.

I have loved to wear fem clothing as far back as I can remember but I never had a name to put on it until I was in my late 20's. But it was not until my 50's that I actually was able to deal with it. But I could not have done that without having had a name put on it.

[Tess]

I never felt "different", at least not until I was about 12 and slipped on a pair of my mother's panties. It was like throwing a switch. From then on I knew there was a difference, especially coupled with confusion about my sexuality.

[Edyta_C]

My Mother dressed me as a girl from birth to about age five. When my brother was born, my Dad forced me to start being a boy. I had a accident which required stitches in my face near the eye. I was terrified because I thought they were putting out my eye because I was resisting being a boy. My Dad finally made me get my hair cut before 1st grade. It was shoulder length and blonde. I cried and screamed. But it happened. Two days later, I ran away from home with the girl across the street. She dressed me as a girl with a bonnet. We eluded the police and neighbors for hours. I got in so much trouble over that incident that I caved in for a number of years. As a teen, my Mom would sometime let me dress. And of course, I snuck in a few times when they were out.

So I have always had this desire. Now at least I not angry with my parents and the world. I accept myself for what I am, sometimes boy and sometimes girl. Much calmer and happier when I am a girl.

Just my two and half bits worth.
Hugs Edy
BTW that's where Edy came from. My Mom called me Edy (pronounced eedie not eddie). I hid that by adopting the dancer's name on Dancing with the Stars.

[beenherelongtime]

can't remember back to when i was 4. my earliest memory, when i was about 7/8/9, i don't remember which, i just know we moved from this street when i was 9. anyway i had 2 friends, 1 named bob and 1 named jack. one day we went into bobs house when nobody else was home. don't remember who suggested it, i think it was jack, but we went into bobs sisters bedroom, i think she was much older then us, we opened her drawers and looked at all her pretty(as least to us) lingerie. we didn't try anything on, but as we were leaving, Jack remarked: wouldn't it be nice if we could wear pretty things like that. Maybe the seeds were sown at this time. I didn't dress until i was into my teens after that, although i have a faint memory of my sisters putting dresses on me for plays on our back porch. i started wearing my mom's and my sisters (2) panties when i was 13 and doing you know what. From there it progressed to slips, half-silps, then a bra then a girdle, then blouses and skirts and zoom from there on.

[Desiree2bababe]

at the age 4 thru 14, it was the feel of the clothes. Age 16 until.......the attention, plus the look.

Funny though, I've never ever been fem except when dressed. Rough and tumble normal boyhood and very manly adulthood.

Go figure........

[Marjory]

As far back as I can remember I new I was different. Learned the word "transvestite" at about 14... so there were others like me. I love being a crossdresser.

[balletchick]

It really kicked in around age 12, and I remember thinking that this isn't good and that its gonna make my life more difficult, but I also knew then that I was never gonna stop. I did purge from 21 to 24 but it came back with a vengence.

I always knee I was different than other boys I had no interest in sports, my interests were in the arts music, dance,painting, and creative writhing. I went to college for music.

I remember as a kid taking hockey at the encouragement of others and I ended up in a ballet class LOL basically I couldn't skate, so the coach made take a figure skating class. The figure skating teacher said I had no balance and that I needed to take a ballet class it was almost like fate saying you took a wrong turn but I'll fix it for you.

[Cari]

Wish I had a simple answer but for me its a two parter.

For the body of the post: I have always had a fascination with all things feminine and remember trying on womens clothing at an early age.

For the title: Found out I was a crossdresser in my mid to late 30's.

My answer to "How do you know when you are 4 ? " is that I didn't; I was just playing and exploring my world. I really dont have memories that early but there are stories and pictures of me playing with sisters toys ect. I looked happy.

I think it was in the middle of grade school when I started to realize I was different. After all I was the only guy in class who wanted cooties :) And I didnt understand why the Boys and Girls were going in different directions and didnt play together anymore.

During puberty fears and doubts started taking hold. Denial ect

To shorten a long story in order to get past those fears and doubts I had to do some research , reach out to others and some soul searching.

I dress in the clothing of the opposite gender so I am a crossdresser. But I prefer the term Transgender its much more inclusive and just seems to fit better for me.


Cari

[izzfan]

Hmmm.... interesting question. Well, I started CDing at 13 and I've never been exactly sure why. I didn;t feel particularly girly back then [ then again, I never was highly masculine either when I was younger] beforehand and I guess it was mostly out of curiosity. At first it was more of a sexual thing but now it is probably more emotional than any other reason.

Personally, I don't think I will ever know exactly why I started crossdressing, it just happened and seemed to feel good/interesting etc... I'm sure there was probably a lot of psychological stuff going on in the back of my mind at the time.

[NoraTV]

The first time I dressed was as part of pledging a fraternity in college. The pledges were required to dress as girls and come to a frat party as "dates" of their big brothers. I really got into the clothes, makeup, and accessories. For the first time in my life I felt totally comfortable.

[happy2cd]

I started enjoying women's clothing very early (probably 3-4), we had a dress up trunk in the basement for my sisters. There were some old gowns in there, that I loved to pull on. Always thought about how the clothes felt even when I was not wearing them.

At about 12 I liked to play truth or dare with a friend and finally got it to where he figured out that I liked to be dared to put on his sisters dresses, bikinis and such.

By 15-16 I was back at it for a while, then avoided it for much of college. After a rough breakup, I found comfort dressing up again. I have purged, bought, purged and bought again.

I have finally given up trying to fight the fact that I am who I am. When my wife discovered my dressing, I finally had to admit that I was a full blown crossdresser/transvetite. While my wife has trouble accepting this, it has relieved a lot of stress for me.

Hearing everybody else's stories here has been very reassuring as well since I know for certain that I am not alone in dealing with these issues.

Thanks to all for sharing their feelings and experiences on this site.

[JennyII23]

I started with slips at about age 4. For many they were the only garment I wore... Told myself I had a slip fetish. One day in my 20's I looked in the mirror and the girl looking back at me was wearing a slip, pantyhose, bra, heels, and lipstick. I could deny it no longer...

Rita D

lv ya:hugs:

[Jocelyn Quivers]

It was probably my very first, "dresses are for girls, pants are for boys, you are a boy which means you do not wear dresses" talk from my mom around the ripe age of 4. Although it took around 20 plus years for me to finaly admit to myself I am one.

[Ballerina]

I had never really considered this part of me as a "crossdresser" until about 8 mo. ago. I had always been doing what I was without putting a label on it. I even knew about crossdressing and transgendered (even though I did fall for the gay stereotype) people and I still didn't click into it. I was denying it and was trying not to show any form of my feminine side, but was never a brute while hiding.

I know my feelngs started when I was 10; even though I do remember my sister giving me a makeover at 6 and it didn't activate anything. I remember grabbing catalogues and brochures of women's clothing and costumes, and wishing that I could have them. It wasn't until I was 18 that I snatched a new bra and a pair of tights that my cousin had left behind after moving out. I didn't put a label onto my feelings and accept myself until my GF and I broke up. Thankfully, we are back together and she is accpeting to my crossdressing feelings :)

[CrossGirl]

I realized I was a CDer when I was in 6th grade. I slept the night at my aunt's house, and all the adults ended up going out that night leaving me alone. I was bored and looked around the house trying to find something to do. I went into my aunts closet and tried her clothes on.

The rest is history. :)

[Jess_cd32]

For me that was simple...at 4 YO I used bedsheets to make my dresses :battingeyelashes: Of course, I also knew that I was "different" from the other little boys.

I bet your Mom was glad Lilith you didn't eye her curtains like Scarlet O'Hara did in Gone With The Wind,lol JK girl:hugs:

I started about 7-8 y/o also like most.

[quietone]

i started at the age of 6 .playing with my sisters tights .i never told any one how good i felt wearing them.we were playing peter pan and non of my brothers wanted to play peter pan cause they had to wear tights so i told my sister that ill do it.and god i felt so good wearing them but i had 2 pretend i didnt.every since that day every thing changed.i started wearing my sisters pantiesand clothe .

[Jennifer in CO]

1st comment...its amazing all the newbies to the forum we have of late...welcome

Main comment...as a child I was always with the women folk since I was not allowed to do anything that required a physical input (severe asthma and no drugs back then) hence I just grew up being more comfortable around them. My whole childhood was in essence a girls upbringing. I could bake and sew with the best of them. I was totally comfortable playing dolls with my sister or cousins. Yeah I played with my cars and built models but those were alone times. When Mom hadn't done that load of laundry, I wore my sisters PJs to bed. Several things I do remember. Staying at Grannys and she polished my sisters finger nails...then did mine. I guess I was about 4 or 5 the first time and I do not remember anyone removing it...just wearing it off. Another was when my sister got her first training bra. Mom made it such a big deal and I asked her when I would get mine and she said I wouldn't need one. I don't remember what I did but she gave me my sisters cami's and told me that was all I'd need or something like that. I wore those till I out grew them but then she wouldn't buy me more. Then I don't really remember much till I was 10 and spent 3 weeks with my Aunt. Very long story but that is when Jennifer came into being.

So, when did I know? beats the crap outta me!!!

Jenn

[Carly D.]

I started young.. preschool age somewhere.. and just like everyone else here it just took off... I've searched everywhere on the internet to try to find the reason I feel the way I do.. it's a guilty pleasure for sure..

[rogerbaulk]

Actually, crossdressing is the earliest memory of my whole life. Me and my sister shared a bedroom. One morning, I took a pair of tights from her drawer and put them on in bed. I remember it being a huge sexual thrill. I had no idea why (i was too young lol), but I was HOT with lust.

My Dad came in to try to get me out of bed. I was terrified he would catch me. He even tugged at the blanket, but I held it tight.. eventually he went away.

After that, it was when I was about thirteen. When everyone was out of the house I put on some knickers and a bra that my sister had.

I only did that a few times, and very rare occasions since (like once every five years).

I've just got into it big time, though. That's why I'm here!

[susan2010]

At age 4, I was irresistably drawn to my sister's petticoat. It took me about another 50 years to admit I'm a crossdresser.

[2b.Lauren]

I guess for me it was not really obvious at the time but makes perfect sense now. I did not fuss or fight when my older sister 12 decided to dress me 6 for a tea party in some of her old clothes that did not fit anymore. I also remember regularly coming back to her asking when we would play dress up again! So for me even at the tender age of 6 was aware that my thinking and approach to things were very different to other guy friends I had. I guess the other part is I was just smart enough then to realize that it was not a good idea to tell those same friends of my exploits. It was in me all the time :D

[LeotardMan]

I don’t know how I exactly found out for sure I was a CD I think it just happened. My dad was away a lot so I always did a lot of things with my mom. One of the things we always did together ever since I was little was exercise with her. When I was about 11 or so I all of a sudden wanted to look like her or the women on the exercise videos. One time I found one of her old leotards tired it on and I was hooked!! I would go in my room and pretend I was her working out.

When I was about 14 we were taking karate together at the same studio and I finished up with my class earlier and I was waiting for her and I saw her sparring. Unfortunately she was losing and getting worked on the mat pretty good when I could see she had one a white leotard under her karate outfit. So after that I used to love to dress up and pretend I was her fighting.

I think for me it just happened. I was around my mom alot so I picked up a lot of her feminine traits I guess.

Geoff

[Rachel Morley]

Just like the others have said, I too knew that "I wasn't like the other boys" ... I knew I liked girls clothes and pretty things and I wanted to wear them right from the time I was in junior school.

When I was about 15 and I was learning about my sexuality and whatnot, I just thought my desires were somehow connected to sex and I was just a little bit kinky or whatever. Living the the UK I saw guys dressing up as women for comedy entertainment purposes on TV (Monty Python etc) fairly often but it was not in the same way I wanted to.

The first time I ever actually saw anything about guys dressing in womens clothes and presenting as a woman and being serious about it as part of their life, was a BBC documentary in the early 1980's on someone who wanted a sex change. In that program they also talked about doing something called "crossdressing". So initially I thought crossdressing was about wanting to have a sex change. Now I was even more confused because I knew I wanted to dress but also that I didn't want to change my sex.

Then several years later I saw a national newspaper article about a new store in London called Transformation (Stephanie Anne Lloyd) This store apparently actually helped guys to temporarily transform themselves into "women" for a few hours and then change back. It wasn't a costume party, it was something more serious than that. They called them "crossdressers". That's when I realized ... huh, I guess I must be a crossdresser too! :)

[LisaLedoux]

In High School. Wearing mother's bra, running around the house in a slip and nylons and feeling aroused by all of this. Of course I was a teenager at the time and those feelings dominated almost all my thoughts at the time. It wasn't until my late 20's that I seriously started wanting to actually be a woman.

[serinalynn]

I was home alone one day when I waas 10 going on 11 years old i was feeling a pair of my mothers nylon pantys and I suddenly had to try them on. I was hooked. My parents would go out on friday and saturday nights. I would stay home alone and for a few hours, I would dress up in my mothers lingerie. Just went on from there.

[jessielee]

sincerely didn't know it was allowed! that's why Python's The Lumberjack Song was such a lark! i mean, would would do such a thing?
except i always wanted to. always felt like a girl inside. and dreamed that way. from my earliest memories.
and believed the restrictions to not even think about such things.

[charlie]

I always casually dressed, thought it exciting and either had a quick ending or just removed the clothes after wearing them and seeing myself. Then I restarted dressing last year. I knew then I was a crossdresser......dressing completely and going out as a woman.

[Sarah Martin]

I think - like quite a few girls have noted elsewhere - that I have been 'wired' genetically as a crossdresser, so you could argue that a lot of us were potentially crossdressers from day one!

My first CD experience was at the age of 3 or 4 when I tried some of my Nana's stuff on. Her boots really excited me. And that was it...I've been dressing ever since.

Sarah

[Carin]

Like a few others here, my first memories of crossdressing were are at the age of 12 or so. A few years later I bought 'sexy Men's Underwear" as I tried to put all the pieces together. This was all action without label as I had no resources to research, and besides, no one else it the world did it.

Labelling or categorizing it as crossdressing did not happen for another 15 years. And another 15 years before recognizing it as being transgendered. I wonder what realizations will occur in the next 15 years. :thinking::thinking:

[Mona]

I always knew I was different, tried my sisters panties in my teens, liked silky 'mens' underware, remember seeing a movie (Paris Is Burning, I think) that defined a lot for me but really knew when that 1st dress arrived in the mail!

[emmicd]

I started crossdressing when I was 4-5 years old when I would try on my younger sister's clothes. I just felt natural in feminine clothes. I am a lifetime crossdresser with TG tendencies though I don't act on the TG side. I do however find my need to crossdress very important and a major need since it is part of my makeup as a person.

emmi

[kiyohchan21]

This is how I started.

http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?t=96137

[bridget jones]

I remember like it was yesterday.I went in a neighbors wash room at about the age of 6.I wore silk panties and a cami.To this day I will never understand why I put it on but I feel lucky I experience what many men have never enjoyed or thought about.I love CD and I am verrry happy to be back with Bridget,by nthe way my girl friend named me Bridget.

luv ya girls

[Jenniferpl]

It all started around first grade. I would look at some of the girls and would secretly wish I could be one of them. At one point I was in the bathroom and my sister’s underwear was laying on the floor, so I tried it on and I was hooked for life. I never thought of myself as very masculine. It seemed like I related better to women than to guys. I like to do guy things, I just do not have a lot of guy friends. To this day, it seems like I have more female friends than guy friends.

[anouk]

When I noticed the fenomenom I was about ten. After a year with total confusion I found an article in a health care magazine about transvestists and identified myself as one.

[Josey]

I can't put a specific age or date when it all began. I had two older sisters and a mother who all thought nothing about walking around in their underwear getting ready to go out somewhere. I became attracted to their attire and made a beeline to their dressers whenever possible to try THINGS on. That was the start of it! I was a young teenager at the time. I do not regret those times and certainly love where I am at these days.

[Joanne f]

This might sound a bit naive but i did not realise what i was until i watched a program on the television one day about a man who was a transvestite , (that's what we were called in those days ) then i thought " holly smoke i must be one of those (well something like that).
I must admit that i did not quite know what to think of myself apart form that i must be abnormal or something worse (OK so i still am ):heehee:.
Then to cut a long story short along came the Internet and i found out that there are others like me ( notice i put" like" and not the same as i do not want complaints sent my way ):heehee:.



joanne

[Claire Cook]

I was wearing my mom's clothes long before I heard of the word crossdresser.

Me too ... that was 60 (gasp!) years ago ... now I'm proud to tell people that I am a CD

[Mitch23]

wearing my mum's undies first when about 7/8 - no sexual aspect then - just felt nice. never told anyone but got caught a couple of times. back in those days oddness was very much tied up with being gay and this was still illegal in the uk so didnt talk about it much and kept my little secret to myself. only been a full on crossdresser for the last 2 years and making up for lost time ...

mitch

[il.dso]

Lots of interesting posts for this topic
My story is pretty similiar to others.
I would only add that "learning that you are a crossdresser"
appears to be a life long process...

[jennylogan]

I remember being in the third grade and watching the girls skipping rope in their Catholic school uniforms. How I wanted to wear that uniform and play with them. It wasn't until I was about 12 when I actively started dressing by wearing clothing my mother thought she donated to charity. I hid the bag of clothing in my closet and tried things on whenever I got the chance. When I was 14 by chance I read an article in an encyclopedia yearbook about gays and lesbians and came across the word crossdresser as a homosexual man who dresses as a woman to more easily pickup men. Confusing to be sure but nonetheless I had a term for what I was doing in secret. Many years and alot of sturm und drang passed before I finally came to accept and embrace this part of me.

[Intertwined]

I was about 8 or 9, we were going from our house in California to Aunt & Uncles in Arizona for Christmas.

Appon arriving in Arizona, we found my suitcase had been left behind, there were alot of my cousins at this family get together, but, the only one my size was Nikki, so for my entire Christmas holiday, I got to wear my cousins cloths, some flannel shirts and jeans, dresses a couple of days, nighties every night.

From that time forward, I wore feminine things every chance I could get.

When I turned 15, my mother opened a dress shop that I worked in after hours cleaning, organizing, steaming newly arrived cloths, and of course, trying on what ever suit my fancy.

[karinels]

I remember sneaking into the bathroom and trying on my mom and sisters things before I was 5. We were still living in the house we moved from when I was that age. I remember the inside of that house, so I know I was that young. I do not remember why I started, but I do remember hosiery being what I longed for the most. As I got older, the feelings got stronger. During puberty, I wanted to know how boobs looked and felt on me. During high school, I wanted to know how it felt to wear heels and make up. I always mentioned to my parents that I wanted to be, or should have been a girl, but they told me that was nonsense, and the few times I was caught wearing I was punished severely. I should have pushed the issue hard until they would have had no choice but to seek proffesional help. Then who knows, maybe I would be happier.

[CD Susan]

This all started for me when I was 5 years old. This was 55 years ago and the year was 1953. When I started kindergarten I remember seeing the girls in thier pretty frilly dresses and wanted to wear one too. I asked my Mom if I could wear a pretty dress to school too like the rest of the girls. She explained to me that only girls could wear dresses and not boys. I did not understand this and felt very confused and dissapointed that I could not wear a pretty dress too. This is when I knew I was different from the other boys and started experimenting with my three sisters' clothing. I have been cd'ing ever since this time and know that it is part of me and will never go away and I am accepting of that.

[DinaMature]

and believed the restrictions to not even think about such things.[/COLOR][/FONT]


Honestly, I know realize many elements were active by the onset of puberty but my environment was rarified Fem dominated but the masculine was hyper macho, as well.

I lived out so many scenarios examing laundry hampers or perusing dresser drawers as a young man. Later buying lingerie and enjoying assorted levels of underdressing as I matured.

But it was so stigmatized and I so set in the masculine mold, that crossdressing was never fully considered. I had some other distraction that I couldn't identify but it wasn't that.
Having more or less knocked some sense into my own head, I've only just recently figured it out.

[tanya1976]

[QUOTE=CrossJess;1529222]I’m just interesting knowing how everyone here found out they had girly tendencies and the lust for dressing up girly.

I suppose it was around about the age of ten/eleven when I realised I had an uncontrollable urge to wear stockings/hose. Then when I found out they felt as good as they looked....:)

[jenncrosser]

I never had any sisters, but I remember playing with a neighborhood boy and I would always pretend to be the girl. I don't even know what or why we'd be playing, but it was in his parents bedroom and/or giant wlak in closet, and no one would be watching us, so we could play and do whatever we wanted. I think we used to play strip poker (I have no idea where we got that idea) and I would intentionally lose.

After that, I remember looking in the shopping catalogs and sunday sales ads and I wanted to have some panties. I was around 8 or 9, and I had no idea why I wanted the panties, I just knew I had to have them. I had no way of getting them until I was 12 or 13 and was able to get some at Target near our new house. Since then, it's been panties and more for me.

[brandiCD19]

when i was young i just put my moms things on, dont remember why, and kinda kept doing, then later on it felt sexy, and i liked it