Awkward time

[nikki47]

Last week me and my wife were watching the film Kinky Boots on television,when our 16 yr old son came in and joined us anyway it got to the part when they went to the club and the drag act was on,and they were showing the audience,which were nearly all crossdressers and our son was really insulting asking why do men dress like that and it's not normal,i was feeling so defensive inside,in fact i was boiling up about it,but because he dosen't know about me i let it go.My wife bless her seeing how uncomfortable i was tried her best to explain why some men liked to dress as women,but she couldn't change his opinion.It really upset me,but i guess we are all entitled to our opinions,yet deep inside i really wanted to say thats who i am and i'm proud of it and also wishing i was there in that club enjoying who i am rather been stuck so far in the closet.

Nikki

[deja true]

A fair few of us would have said the same thing when we were 16...

Prolly not so much as a statement of our deep down embedded philosophy of life (who really has one of those at 16) but as a public statement made for your benefit that he's a 'normal' man!

Really , it's a parental thing to take the initiatie in situations like that to open a conversation about tolerance and diversity.

Don't worry...he'll find his own kink some day...maybe already has!

:)

[insearchofme]

As Shakespear said, "Me thinks he doth protest too much".

Some times we condem things we are really attracted too inorder to deny that we may be attracted to it. Especially 16 year old males who are coming to terms with their emerging sexuality.

You may have a future CD in your family, watch carefully.

[JoAnne Wheeler]

I think that it was just a teenage response. Accept for that. I don't think that I would come out to him anytime soon.
Love,
JoAnne Wheeler

[Mitch23]

... and it was an excellent film too

mitch

[SANDRA MICHELLE]

I also agree that your son has protested too much and maybe there is something behind it. Even if it has nothing to do with him being a CD he really needs to be able to understand his issues with it. I used to years ago talk about these same things before I accepted my crossdressing and new it was not that i was gay just liked to crossdress and there are many of us and I am not the only "wierdo".

[DameErrant]

At 16 this is probably the most insecure period of his life as far as sexuality and sexual identity are concerned. It is not unusual for someone still trying to figure out who they are to try too hard to become the person they think that they are expected to be. Many of us tried to be "more macho than thou" in High School.

Or he may just need a little education to have his perspective expanded. Either way it will take time for him to come around.

[Karren H]

I love that movie!!! A parent trying to change a teenagers mine is next to impossible.. They know everything about everything.. And the harder you try the more they become fixed in their position so I'd just drop it... If I were you..

[Sam-antha]

I am glad you did not get steamed up with your boy, who is after all an inexperience lad... so far.
I missed it and could not be bothered to check out the bbciplayer repeats.
Now if it had been that one with the bus in Australia and those marvellous costume scenes..... but I have that on tape.

[Kendra08]

At 16 I probably would have had the same response, if not worse, even though I was seccretly wearing my sisters underwear every chance I had. Not saying he's a CD but it's a weird time in all of our lives.

[flatlander_48]

As Shakespear said, "Me thinks he doth protest too much".

Some times we condem things we are really attracted too inorder to deny that we may be attracted to it. Especially 16 year old males who are coming to terms with their emerging sexuality.

You may have a future CD in your family, watch carefully.

That certainly is a possibility, but also remember that youth is a time of extremes. There is not much experience to help temper ones judgment or reactions. Think: Having a Crush...

[tricia_uktv]

Give your son time. My daughters are starting to accept me. They are nearly 17. They couldn't get it a year ago.

[PamelaTX]

My teenage daughter tends to react the same way to that sort of thing. I usually go along with her a bit, and then say something like "Yeah, but you know it's really no big deal," or "Yeah, but it's not hurting anybody."

I believe that a gentle shove in the right direction is better than either taking a stand or ignoring the issue.

[Nicki B]

..anyway it got to the part when they went to the club and the drag act was on,and they were showing the audience,which were nearly all crossdressers and our son was really insulting asking why do men dress like that and it's not normal,

I count some of those girls as friends... Would he like to meet a few? :)

[Jo-Michelle]

I can uderstand your feelings. Teenagers are hard to deal with at anytime IMO. They are very opinionated because they think they know everything. I had the hardest times with my son during his teenage years. Your wife understands, thats the most important.

[Gabrielle Hermosa]

Well, it looks like everyone else said everything I was thinking of saying. lol

It's true though. When I was 16, I might have commented very similar. Even though I had my urges, I was in complete and total denial about them at that age. That age is all about conformity and fitting in, which includes making fun of all that is different - you remember how it was, don't you?

It's probably a good idea to try and educate your son about being accepting of peoples' differences though. Wish I could offer some advice as to how, but there's probably no easy way about it.

[Megan70]

I too loved that movie. Give it time, all things take time to gain acceptence.

[nikki47]

Thanks for your replys i do realise at his age and lack of maturity,he will occasionally have differing opinions and in time he will probably understand.I remember at his age i always thought i was right.I work mainly with men and some of these are 40+ and they too are very ignorant about us crossdressers,i've just learned to accept that they too are ignorant and with not wanting to out myself,i just think to myself that i'm truly happy with the way i am,how many of them can say that,i wonder.

I'm just so glad that i found this wonderful forum.

Nikki

[beenherelongtime]

16 is really young, give him time, don't try to force anything on him.

[Catherine99]

Great movie, gonna watch it tonight.