Advice....Please

[boardpuppy]

Hi Ladies,
When I came out to the SO, it wasnt pretty. Their were a lot of tears, the normal questions and stress. The bra, panties and knylons (maybe) were ovious. The thing is what I don't know is if the SO realizes how asurtive Alice has become. Yes my fem personnality has a name (SO DOSNT know), or about wearing makeup, completely dressing, taking rides in the real world and most of all shopping. Oh, the shopping, trying on all those nice pretty, soft lacy blouces and durling (in my mind) over the panties and bra's (oh the colors and selection). Sorry, I got a littled carried away, didnt realize how easily the fog could carry me away. I have been able to control the dreaded "Pink Fog" to a small extent. Well the SO controlles it (with presents) when we are out together, unfortunenetly I'm only in drab. I'd really be in troulbe if I was dressed. The SO has watched as I have shuffled through the blouces, pants, bra's and panties, knowing everytime if what I picked out to show her is something for me or her. Couldn't tell if it was anger directed at my DCing or because we both have to shop in the same shop (sizes). When shopping together, I do/have picked more than half of her clothes. I have said all that to ask for help. I have tried several times to expain more fully about the fog and Alice but the words aren't coming together and I lose the moment.

[Sheila]

Aloce, can you fill us in on how long you have been dresing nad how long your SO has known about it.

If your SO will come to the website we have a great F.A.B. forum, where after she has done 10 posts on the forum including an intro then she can apply to join us in there, where she can talk things through with peeps who have been where she is.

[JoAnne Wheeler]

ALICE - are you serious about this GG ? If you are, then you both need to explore crossdressing - if you have been following the posts on this website and if you have done any research, then you should know that the URGE/DESIRE to crossdress NEVER goes away - you may try to make it go away, BUT, IT WON"T. In fact the more you try to make it go away or to suppress it, the STRONGER it will come back. We don't know WHY - it just does. So if your GG has problems now with crossdressing, you better have a heart to heart talk before you go any farther with your relationship with your GG. She needs to know this. She also needs to know that the URGE/DESIRE gets stronger and stronger as we get older. WHY ? We don't know, it just does.
Does this help you ?
JoAnne Wheeler

[boardpuppy]

It is not excusable for the delay in answering, when you have taken your time to offer help/advice but the thread started by Tamara has had my attension.

Sheila,
I didn;t include a lot of personnal info in my bio but in a nutshell. I started dressing at 9-13 yrs. old, in my mothers clothes, primarily laungeria. I dabbled a little, depressed, belittled, and ridiculed (normal for a CDer) my self (over 45 yrs.) until about 4-5 months ago..The lid came off. Everyone was on eggshells and I was H### to live with. We just celebrated our 40 anniversy and I think we will make it, but its the trust issue I'm concerned with know. If agreeable I'd like to talk.

JoAnn,
Thank you and sorry for the delay.

[Joanne f]

I think you said a lot when you said "how assertive Alice can be" if you want you SO to understand and if possible help then that assertiveness has to go , you have to let your SO absorb it at the rate she wants to (if at all )

[Catherine99]

The desire to dress is greater due to the increase in etrogen as you get older......makes you feel more like a woman.

[Cassia-Marie]

The best advice I can give right now is to recognize how assertive Alice is being and how dense the Pink Fog is and turn some of that energy and attention back onto your wife. Take her out more often. Be sure to compliment her (just not in a way that makes her think you're only doing it to get what you want, of course - be sincere!). Surprise her with flowers. Kiss her on the cheek every chance you get. Do whatever it takes to make her feel like the extra-special lady she is.

The reason I advise this is because I, too, got a little more than lost in the Pink Fog about a month ago and I totally lost touch with my wife. She felt abandoned, sad, lonely, and it was all my fault. I was spending too much time on Cassia-Marie and ignored the one person who is most important in my life - my wife.

So please don't make the same mistake I made. If she's buying you presents, there's at least some level of acceptance there. Relish it! And make sure she knows how special she is for understanding - even if that understanding is only a little - how much this means to you.

[boardpuppy]

Hi Ladies,
Each of you has advanced a point that I haven't though about. There is a great deal to mull over and consider. Thanks to each of you for your insight.