Showing ID at bars, shops, airports, etc.

[tgirlinva]

I am currently in the transition process and am still wearing the dreaded wigs, heavy makeup, etc. Anyways, when I go to the mall to return some thing and the cashier asks me for ID, I get flustered and give them some lame excuse that I forgot my ID in my other purse. I don't go to clubs or places where it is foreseeable that I would be asked an ID, except at a gay club or smtg. Anyways, my bf and I want to take a trip which involves flying and I really want to be myself, but I'm afraid that I'll create some big scene. Bf says just to go for it, it'll give me more confidence or what not, but I'm still afraid of the "look". Can anyone talk about their experience?

[GypsyKaren]

I used to just tell them "I look a wee bit different now", and I never had any problems, as a matter of fact, I'd get more than a few "good for you!" from the women. Bottom line: nobody cares and it's not a big deal.

Karen :star:

[Melissa A.]

If I'm buying alcohol and am asked for ID, I just show it, with a smile. they're usually doing it to mess with me, and I'm not giving them the satisfaction. I'm not out there trying to fool anyone, anyway. I am who I am. I would, however, like to get the name and ID change rolling soon. I have a plane trip this summer. If your ID and your look dont match, though, don't worry. I've spoken to a few girls who have had no problems in airports. You're not breaking any laws. I will admit to being a bit concerned about travel, though. It could be the women I've spoken to just got lucky, or ran into nice people. With all the security rules, they do have the power to humiliate you to some degree, if they want to, I suppose. But if you're out and about in your daily life, you grow pretty thick skin. At least I have. Clubs arent a problem for me, being 49. It's kinda ludacriss to ID me at the door. lol! Some grocery and liquor stores do it either because they ID virtually everyone, Or they just wanna mess with the tranny. Either way, I dont care. And I let them know I dont care. Btw, I treat being asked for ID at a return counter the same as I do when Radio Shack asks for my adress when I buy batteries-"I don't have to give you that, and it's none of your business"

Hugs,

Melissa:)

[tori-e]

Don't mess around with customs and airport security. Carry what ID you have and answer questions honestly. I carry a passport with my female name and picture, but with a big "M" on it. Nobody ever seems to notice. I've also kept a carry letter in my purse for ages but have never had to use it. See:
http://members.shaw.ca/terribreeze/images/Documents/File0331copy.JPG

My experience is that people don't seem to care, or just don't want to get involved.

Terri

[Sharon]

I flew several times before having my name legally changed and never had any difficulties when I presented identification with my former first name. I didn't offer any excuses or stories and was never asked for any. :)

[Mean Green Irene]

I was transitioning and had my drivers license picture taken enfemme. My name was male but the picture matched my fem image. I went through airport security a couple of times, rented cars and presented my ID several places without one issue.

Also prior to changing the picture I had to show ID when using my credit cards and they did a double take and I said that I have changed some. But no problem ------ don't worry about it.
Irene.

[Teresa Amina]

It is surprising how matter of fact people take the difference. I have even been complemented more than once about how natural my hair looks after they've seen my balding DL photo :) Most people, even in conservative areas, are either nice or neutral and don't get too weirded out by the discontinuity and I have never been harassed by anyone once they "know".

[marie354]

I did some checking on this a few months ago and in Maryland it's only $105 to have your name changed legally. As it happens, It's time to renew my ID soon, so I plan to have my name changed before so I'll have all the paperwork ready when I renew it.

Then, at least my name & picture will match for situations like that.
:o

[tgirlinva]

Thanks ladies for all the responses... but I was more referring to the discrepancy between how you look in front of them and how you look on your ID.. I have a pretty androgenous name and I don't think someone would look so closely as to notice the "M". I'm just scared that they see my picture on my ID and automatically know and ridicule me or do something embarassing at my expense.

[Teresa Amina]

in Maryland it's only $105 to have your name changed legally

Costs a lot more here in Michigan- court $150, state police background check $50, publication cost $50. I'll see how much the Drivers License change costs next week after my hearing on Monday but I understand the Social Security change is free after all this :)

[John]

I'm just scared that they see my picture on my ID and automatically know and ridicule me or do something embarassing at my expense.

People who work in airports, espeshally custums, are likely to have undergon a lot of customer service orientated training, they know the basic dos and don'ts, and perpously ridiculing or embarassing a customer is likely to result in diseplinory action at the least, so even if they are inclined to react negativly, they're unlikely to do anything. That's presuming they do act negativly, I'm not sure about the states, but in britan I've never actually come across a negative reaction in the past three years. Suprised, confused, and worried that they'll do something to offend me, sure, but never actualy negative (in fact it dose seem to eurn me quite some respect).


Costs a lot more here in Michigan- court $150, state police background check $50, publication cost $50.

Youch! That's why I love living it britan, it was a fiver and five minuets to get mine chainged.

[Sally24]

Thanks ladies for all the responses... but I was more referring to the discrepancy between how you look in front of them and how you look on your ID.
Since you say you are transitioning then why don't you just have your id picture retaken? If you still not out then why not go in and have it retaken with an androgynis look?