Is dressing sexual or emotional?

[dedeman]

I'm not quite sure how to phrase this question, but I'm curious why others dress.

I do it because of the extreme sexual excitement. Although I'm usually not sexually aroused at the time, it is the most elongated adrenaline rush I can experience. Depending on the circumstance, I'll get cotton mouth, heart racing, heavy breathing, etc. This is all if I'm out in public (with very limited exposure). I guess the fear of getting caught combined with the fear of attracting the wrong attention is what does it for me.

But I understand there are some people that dress because of personal satisfaction, or identification issues, etc.

This is my first post, but not my last. I'll keep this one short, but please forgive me if my future posts tend to run on. :o

[VeronicaMoonlit]

Since transfolk are all individuals, we're like snowflakes! It could be: Either, both, or neither.

Veronica
Rondelle (Ron) Rogers Jr.

[ColleenShivas]

I'm not quite sure how to phrase this question, but I'm curious why others dress.

I do it because of the extreme sexual excitement. Although I'm usually not sexually aroused at the time, it is the most elongated adrenaline rush I can experience. Depending on the circumstance, I'll get cotton mouth, heart racing, heavy breathing, etc. This is all if I'm out in public (with very limited exposure). I guess the fear of getting caught combined with the fear of attracting the wrong attention is what does it for me.

But I understand there are some people that dress because of personal satisfaction, or identification issues, etc.

This is my first post, but not my last. I'll keep this one short, but please forgive me if my future posts tend to run on. :o

Yes to both. It is also sensual, recreational and therapeutic. And probably more ...

[dedeman]

VeronicaMoonlit, I realize people dress for different reasons, that's exactly why I was asking.

I'm just not sure of all the reasons people may do it.

Thanks for the response, though.

[Ballerina]

Both. It used to be more of a strong turn on, but now that I've opened it up to myself, it's nowhere near as bad and is more of personal expression. (As my GF reads and unable to understand, lol)

[theresa_phillipa]

Yes to both. It is also sensual, recreational and therapeutic. And probably more ...

Yes, what SHE said!
However i'd have to say that sensual doesn't always {sometimes,rarely....} mean Sexual.
The feeling of 'YES! This FEELS like ME' when i slip into my bra and panties and a nice pair of slacks is totally sensual. But if i got all sexual everytime i got dressed in the morning, i'd never get ANYthing done.
Recreational?
Sure, when i know i have the time and privacy i LOVE to play dress up; try a little make up; heels---though i am way too wobbly yet to even THINK about going out in heels. It is simply FUN to feel all Girlie sometimes.
Therapeutic?
And how! While i have only 'purged' my closet once, my therapist said Never Again. Really, i got so depressed, out of it, crud-minded. When i finally relented and got some new things---and figured out how to wear them most all the time albeit discreetly---did i come out of my funk; began to feel like the woman i was born to be.

[Ballerina]

Ah, ok, didn't quite think of it that way. It's then more sensual than sexual for me, too.

[danacd96]

For me its more emotional than sexuall. Like maybe 75% emotional 25% sexuall. That could all change depending on my mood swings however. But I'll stick to the 75-25:)
dana

[vivianann]

For me I dress as a woman because I identify as a woman, I use to get cotton mouth and heart racing like you do now, I do not experience anxiety like that anymore since I go out enfemme almost everday. It is not sexual for me either, when I was a teenager it was a sexual turn on, I am glad it is not a sexual fetish anymore. Right now I consider it to be emotional uplifting, and when I am out enfemme I am very relaxed.

[ProjectLisaCD]

Before I began to crossdress forced femininzation was one of my best fantasies. After I started that does nothing for me anymore. Crossdressing became 100% emotional.

[Michelle_in_tights]

Definitely sexual. Once I've relieved myself I feel a real prat and can't went to get out of my female clothes. I only wear for upto an hour as I don't feel relaxed or comfortable in them.

[Mollyanne]

Hi, When I first started dressing(the day after the earth was made)it was for the sexual excitement and that lasted many many years. Now I dress for the pure pleasure of becoming a woman, I LOVE feeling the weight of my breasts(if only they were real), I LOVE the silky feeling of having pantyhose on my shaved legs, I LOVE the feeling of my heels and the sound that they make when I walk. I think you get the idea!!!!! I maybe a "he" genetically but the real me is a "she" and I I have come to accept her.

:love: Mollyanne

[insearchofme]

I identify the most with what Mollyanne and Vivianann said. Early on in my dressing it was all sexual but as I mature it is more emotional.

We all change over time.

[Jenniferpl]

Mollyanne said everything that I would have said. There is no better feeling than wearing satin. 4" heesl just add to it.

[Claire Cook]

I identify the most with what Mollyanne and Vivianann said. Early on in my dressing it was all sexual but as I mature it is more emotional.

We all change over time.

Dana has said it all for me.

[MarinaTwelve200]

Dressing is just a SYMPTOM or response to a wide variety of often unrelated psychological conditions, so, depending on the individual it can be sexual, emotional, recreational, theraputic or whatever. "Dressing" in itself is not the "issue", but rather something ELSE in the person that expresses itself in dressing---which can be one or more of many factors.

[Kathi Lake]

Personally, for me, it's all emotional. When I dress, I feel, . . . content. Right. Normal. It's as if I am doing just what I'm supposed to. The feeling is just like slipping into a nice warm bubble bath. Seeing Kathi take shape in the mirror as I'm doing my makeup and hair, the feeling of zipping up a skirt and sliding those hose-clad legs into a pair of 4-inch pumps, . . . wow!

That said, much of what I experience is sensual. That is, many of my senses are in overdrive. Smell especially. Touch as well, but sight is probably the most "used" of my senses. I just enjoy looking in the mirror and seeing that smiling girl looking back. To me, there is a difference between sensuality and sexuality.

Kathi

[Alana65]

I identify the most with what Mollyanne and Vivianann said. Early on in my dressing it was all sexual but as I mature it is more emotional.

We all change over time.

I agree. Vivianann & Mollyanne put into words, what I was thinking.

[Marjory]

[QUOTE=Mollyanne;1582958]Hi, When I first started dressing(the day after the earth was made)it was for the sexual excitement and that lasted many many years. Now I dress for the pure pleasure of becoming a woman, I

Same as above, Nothing lowers blood pressure better than a walk in a pair of ballet flats.
( my dressing is down to to a say at home wife)

[Angie G]

I've never been into the big macho thing and dressing for me was never really a sexual thing. Its' more about the girl in me. And the clothes.:hugs:
Angie

[Bilinda]

We all dress for so many different reasons. I think most here dress because it just feels right to them. Myself however, it's mostly sexual. Also most of the time when I dress I'm with my lesbian girlfriends, which adds to the excitement!
:D

[Jenniferpl]

Both. Depends on my mood and mostly importantly my wife's. Sometimes she want Jennifer and sometimes she wants her husband.

[TGMarla]

When I was younger, there was a huge sexual overtone to crossdressing for me. That has waned somewhat as years went on, but it can still be quite erotic if I choose it to be. But it's gone from a primary reason to a secondary reason, and now it's an emotional "chicken soup for the soul" thing more than anything else.

[KarenSusan]

I think Mollyanne hit the nail on the head. When I was young there was a large sexual content to it but as I got older there was less. Now when I dress there is no sexual content, just a warm feeling that this is how it was intended to be.

[Maria_1969]

For me its both.... when I was a teen it was all sexual but as a 40yo man it now relaxes me as well.

[carolinebrookes]

When I was in my early teens, it was definitely a sexual thing. It was a major turn on for me.

By my mid to late teens the sexual thing had faded to next to nothing and now, I find myself reaching for the softer, more sensual side of things.

It's fun for me to be able to change from tough guy to soft feminine woman all at the change of a mood.
For me, mostly I like the clothes. I like how certain clothes look on women and try to emulate if I can. It's so much more different to being a guy. As a guy I can wear a limited style of clothing where as when I'm in girl mode, I can wear just about anything imaginable!

With a few exceptions, womens clothes are far more comfortable than mens anyway and certainly soften my outlook to life.

[JoAnne Wheeler]

I think that the younger you are, then greater is the SEXUAL aspect of CDing.

The older we get, then greater is the EMOTIONAL aspect of CDing. When I was young, it seems like a dressing session always CLIMAXED (pun intended) with sexual release.

Now, all I want to do is just enjoy the relaxation, the satisfaction, the emotional feeling of just dressing up in JoAnne's clothing and transforming of my rough male personna into the FEMININITY of JOANNE

JoAnne Wheeler

[brittdoll]

It is a bit of both for me.

[PretzelGirl]

I think you can find any reason you want to dress. There is no limit to the imagination. For me, it can change on a daily basis. It can be for relaxation, sensual, or even just to feel like I am spoiling myself.

[Tashee]

Way emotional for me....

Sex can be an emotional thing too. But being soft and setting free of the world of the toughest survives...Where the strongest arm quickest gun and fastest car rules the day. Emotion ran high for me. Granted I started even before I knew I did.. So How could any of this play into it? I don't know? But even then I wanted to be a soft girl. I wanted a break from being the Hellion boy that I was. huh:eek: still am.

T

[docrobbysherry]

I do it because of the extreme sexual excitement. Although I'm usually not sexually aroused at the time, it is the most elongated adrenaline rush I can experience. Depending on the circumstance, I'll get cotton mouth, heart racing, heavy breathing, etc.


Without ever leaving my closet!:)

I also cannot separate the, "sensual", from the, "sexual", feelings! As others here do.:eek:

I HAVE noticed the sexual feelings tend to decrease with time. But, then, I'll come up with a new look that knocks my socks off! And it comes roaring back!:heehee:

[Holly]

Do you know what it feels like when you have been away for awhile and you open the door to your home and step in? That's what dressing to me feels like... relief and peace, being home and comfortable again, where I can let my guard down and just be myself.

[suit]

I have watched this web page for a while now. and my urges have subsided a lot, due to what I 'm not sure. I think the image of, worthness desirablity and calm contol all seem to wraped up in the idea of crossddressing.

[Briana Blonde]

It's sexual for me but I seem to be in the minority.

[Jennifer_Cross]

Do you know what it feels like when you have been away for awhile and you open the door to your home and step in? That's what dressing to me feels like... relief and peace, being home and comfortable again, where I can let my guard down and just be myself.

Wow!! Me and my GG (SO) were only talking about this last night... You hit it on the nail..

Jen

[Tashee]

Wow!! Me and my GG (SO) were only talking about this last night... You hit it on the nail..

Jen



Holly --Do you know what it feels like when you have been away for awhile and you open the door to your home and step in? That's what dressing to me feels like... relief and peace, being home and comfortable again, where I can let my guard down and just be myself.

Tashee
I wish I could have said it that plainly and succinctly. that explanation is a beautiful one that explains the majority of us..I think:hugs:

[mannph]

it is sexual for me! As i get older, my desire to dress has gotten stronger. After sexual release, my desire to be dressed disappears.
:brolleyes:

[Jayne]

It was sexual for me at first and I identify with the need to dress the quick thrill and relief. Then a quick look in the mirror sent signals of what a prat, what do I look like, a quick change and shame for what I had done.
I would buy shoes,nail polish and undies, once I had satisfied myself they would be binned or burnt, (I would never do that again would I?) but I did.
Now I enjoy the feeling and feel relaxed not ashamed.
Mainly due to the corespondence through poeple in the forum.

Thanks to you all :)

[Kelsy]

When I was younger there was a sexual component. When I was younger the sexual component entered every waking thought!!:heehee: When I started dressing there was no sexual consideration. Now It is an emotional and physcological need but there is more. there is some kind of drawing, an unexplainable attraction and a quest to answer the question!!!

Kelsy

[Melora]

BOTH FOR SURE!!
Why should it not be??

[Mistybtm]

Both for me as well, but mostly because it relaxes me.
puts me in a calm state of mind. but also i dress for my dates in a sexy way. :daydreaming:

[Megan70]

It's sexual for me but I seem to be in the minority.
No you're not Briana, its very sexual for me also,and I have nothing to be ashamed about.

[Raychel]

When I was younger, there was a huge sexual overtone to crossdressing for me. That has waned somewhat as years went on, but it can still be quite erotic if I choose it to be. But it's gone from a primary reason to a secondary reason, and now it's an emotional "chicken soup for the soul" thing more than anything else.


I think Marla said it best "chicken soup for the soul"

Thanks Marla for saving me all that typing. :hugs:

[Robyn7778]

For me, in my fantasies and early dabbling (a pair of panties here, pantyhose there) it was all sexual. Then, when I actually took the step to fully dress, I still thought it was all sexual until I looked at myself in the mirror. At that moment, I realized it was much more than just sexual. I saw a whole new side of myself and realized that you can not separate the sexual from the emotional. And that scared the hell out of me. It took me 8 months to come to terms with that and summon up the courage to do it again. And now, I love the strong, sensual and sexy woman that I become when I dress. So I guess I can't separate the two because I love feeling so sexy, but that doesn't necessarily mean I am looking for or needing sex everytime I dress... I hope that makes sense because I'm still trying to make sense of it all.

[Cheryl T]

When I was younger it was definitely a sexual thing. Why I started I have no idea, but the secretiveness, the forbidden aspect all had a sexual component as did the pure femininity of the clothing.
As I got older that began to fade and I realized that I was expressing part of me that had no other outlet. Over time it progressed to the point I'm at now where the sexual aspect is gone and in it's place is my inner peace and my desire to express myself as a woman. Over the last 3 years I've gone from being a wall flower to confidently moving in society at will, regardless of the venue or time of day. I'm no longer "turned on" sexually, but I am stimulated emotionally as I continue to grow as a woman.

[beenherelongtime]

there is another post that really goes into this.

[Dragster]

I'm 64, and it's still sexual for me too. There is an emotional dimension too, otherwise I would not aspire to going out in public (and I do) but it's small compared to the sexual one.

Tony

[Maryanntv]

Definitely sexual. Once I've relieved myself I feel a real prat and can't went to get out of my female clothes. I only wear for upto an hour as I don't feel relaxed or comfortable in them.

Sounds like me, 20 years ago, on top of that I felt guilt and shame. Now that I accepted this part of me it just relaxes me an feels right.

[curse within]

Yes to both. It is also sensual, recreational and therapeutic. And probably more ...


Could it be because of what builds up prior to giving in? The constant nagging from the urge? That finally when you give in you recieve these type of feelings, you gave in to the urge from what at one time was a sexual desire that now has become a habit.....Just curious..

[adrienner99]

Crossdressing has always aroused me sexually.

But there is far more to it than that--identification of my female side, or perhaps my persistent dislike of the traditional male role. Also, a pure love of women's fashions and makeup that must be similar to that of any woman who watches all the Red Carpet fashion shows and pores over Elle and Vogue and Allure. I love women's clothes--wearing them, looking at them, thinking about them, talking about them...

The constant, overpowering urge to wear dresses and high heels and lip gloss and perfume--blocked by the constant difficulties of doing so openly--create an emotional turmoil. Maybe sexual arousal is a product of that, or maybe the arousal is based on fetish behavior. I doubt I will ever understand all these connections. But my urge to dress is the most fundamental part of my being.

[Cary]

Both!

[Elizabeth2-]

It is all about being who I am on the inside.

XOXOXO

Elizabeth

[Emma Chase]

When I first began dressing there was a sexual element, now I find that when I dress I am more relaxed and it helps me de stress after a bad day

[Mona]

For me it is very sensual and calming, like
i'm completely myself.

[Dana]

Its both I cannot deny it. But as I age?

Its more and more an emotional expression, and statement of who and what I am as a person. As a former GG ~ GF once said, "Your part girl"

I've been with gay guys before, but wasn't really into them, because (A) they were men, and (B) they were gay and into masculine men.

My attraction at the time was because I was into femininity in a world that denied me access to any of that. This also went down in the 70's when in pre-publescence, ragging hormones, etc ~ it a was convienent release of sexual tension.

If I had druthers? I would love to be involved with a GG that could deal with my occassionally being and getting girly. Actually I would love being the "wife" of some strong, professional, self-supporting GG! (Yea right! That's going to happen!)

[Samantha43]

Crossdressing in my younger days was a sexual turn on. That has declined over the years to a point where it has very little to do with sex now. I feel comfortable and all is right when I crossdress. For me it is a feeling of contentment. I find I am more relaxed and at peace with myself, my family and the world.

[tricia_uktv]

Short is good so don't worry about it. There are many different shades of us and all are different and none are wrong. Just try to be yourself?

[CLARRISA]

What allways comes across to me when i see threads like this is the underlining message that if you admit its something sexual then you're not doing it for legitimate reasons..hence if you ever feel you'd like to transition you sure better drop the sexual reasons or your case is somehow less valid..be honest with yourself..for me i want more than just crossdressing, i want the full experience..i want to look like a woman, walk like a women, flirt like a woman, and love like a women..women do like to have sex too you know...mind you i'm deeply lost in the pink fog as i write this...

[Vicki65]

Both for me. (Haven't we been here before very recently?)

It used to be absolutely 100% sexual, now I'd say its about 50/50, though not necessarily 50/50 every time I dress, if you know what I mean.

I dont have any fantasy about having sex *as* a woman would, though I certainly have fantasised about having sex as a man, though dressed as a woman. Hehe, no two of us the same eh? :D

[Emma1976]

It was sexual for me at first and I identify with the need to dress the quick thrill and relief. Then a quick look in the mirror sent signals of what a prat, what do I look like, a quick change and shame for what I had done.
I would buy shoes,nail polish and undies, once I had satisfied myself they would be binned or burnt, (I would never do that again would I?) but I did.
Now I enjoy the feeling and feel relaxed not ashamed.
Mainly due to the corespondence through poeple in the forum.

Thanks to you all :)

I think that kinda covers my teenage years, I didn't then have the nerve to buy stuff tho, just used to pinch mums. But yeah, the feeling of what the hell am I doing, shame and panic trying to put stuff back exactly as it was so she wouldn't notice (if she did she never said anything). But I think deep down I knew I'd do it again.
Now I'm starting to come to terms with this part of me I'm more relaxed with it and enjoy it more. The whole experience of 'becoming / being' Emma for a few hours rather than just the quick thrill.
Think I've got that right. Job to find the right words:confused:

[CharlotteW]

For me, it's mostly fun.
I've always really enjoyed super-feminine women. You know, skirts, heels, nylons, nice hair and make-up. Thinking back to my teens, my girlfriends all dressed like girls. A pretty girl in jeans and flats just didn't get my attention.
Anyway, I like femininity so much, I like to have a little piece of it for myself. Dressing doesn't turn-me-on, I just like doing it and I appear to be calmer when I'm wearing something, even if it's just stockings.

How about 90% fun, 10% comfort.

[inherthings]

For me its still both . Sometimes its very sexual. Other times it just feels good to be in something fem. I work out of my home , sometimes i can be dressed all day without out the sexual feelings. Other times its its just to exciting

[keeganmeuer]

Dressing is still completely sexual for me at the moment. I'm still young though (21) so I assume that the feelings will change over time. And just as has been mentioned earlier in the thread, I do get the feeling of disgust and guilt right after I climax, although it's not as bad as it once was.

[Jess_cd32]

For me its more sensual, relaxing and just enjoying my cd time.
I think a lot of us have been there, done that like the younger ones posting, must be a phase most of us go thru with the sexual aspect/guilt etc...early on.
Glad those days are long gone now, the guilt that is:)

[jamie_s]

It's still a very sexual experience for me. At times dressing is relaxing when other things in life are going pretty crazy but I have yet to cross the threshold into a more emotional or natural feeling from it. Sadly at times it seems that those who express it more as a sexual release are shunned by those who use it as much more of an expression of their true selves. From my years of chatting with others from right across the spectrum I can understand where different views come from. To each their own, as long as one enjoys themself.

[KimberlyS]

I am a male person that has always had masculine and feminine traits. Society has taught me how masculine people dress and how feminine people dress. I am a mix of masculine and feminine traits so I wear a mix of masculine and feminine clothes. Some times more masculine, some times more feminine. But usually a mix of both.

[Daliah]

Sexual. I am relatively new to crossdressing but my interest in this area rose because of my desire to have sex with women as female persona. Right now I am interested in wearing sexy lingerie but who knows where I might go from here?

[Alisha Dayle]

First of all hi to everyone, I am new here just found it and am so glad I did.

Now to reply, I personally dress because I feel natural in the clothes, no more than I figure any other woman feels in normal clothing just simply dressed in my "granny" panties bra and normal outfit. On the other hand as with any gg if I may get into my french maids outfit :o or other such attire I do feel sexy and desire the same attention as any other. I guess what I'm getting at is that as for myself its a comfort like a guy and his boxers or old sweatsuit it covers my body and makes me feel at peace.

[KellyanneLondon]

I am a "both" girl too.. It was a major sexual turn in when I donned my first bra and knickers.
Nowadays its not the reason I dress although it is still there.
I am a much better person when I am kelly, my emotions are there for all to see and I love every minute.
However, I just cant parallel park a car now.
Kelly xx

[xAnne_Mariex]

When I first started out it was 100% sexual and nothing else, now I just really enjoy wearing womens clothes and the sexual side of it, while still present, is nowhere near as prominent as it once was.

[PrettyFlowingGown]

Yes to both. But as I've gotten older (I'm now 36), its more of a emotional outlet, and I'm more content, now that I've come full circle. I've accepted myself before others have accepted me too, and thats what makes me more comfortable with my inner peace.
When I was younger though, especially from 17 to 25, it was strictly sexual. It was excitement and it was a desire, and the risks of dressing was very high, cause I was living with my father and his wife. I was always in fear of getting caught, and there was a part of me that wanted more and more. It was agravating, and when I dressed, it was like a heavy weight had come off my shoulders.

[epsxyblkm]

There are times when I dress from stress, and it is relaxing to be Tegan. But there are other times when it is a real turn on. Seeing myself in the mirror is very sexy, and sensual.

I hope that helps.

P.S. I do have to say though, I can wear my heels for any reason at all. Many a dinner has been made with me hardly able to walk.

[Jaydee]

For me, I think that Holly and Samantha said it best. The sexual component in gone, replaced with a sense of contentment. I like the analogy of "Chicken Soup for the Soul"

Jaydee

[cindyxxx]

Exactly what I have been asking myself for years.

However I have never really understood the answer.
I think it changes as my mood swings.
Sometimes it is an intense adrenalin rush. Mixture of sexual excitement and the pleasure/fear of the 'doing something'
Others it is just so relaxing and comfortable to feel feminine and free.

[ColleenShivas]

I posted earlier that it is both and more, but here is another thought. With age (maturity?) it seems that for me and many others it is less often about sex, and more often about stress relief and relaxation.

I remember one occasion when my wife caught me wearing her undies. She was surprised because we had just had sex that morning. Although I do not smoke, I would compare it to that famous post-coital cigarette.

[Lainie]

Me, too--a mix, changing over time from arousal & adrenaline to comfort.

I worried that I would need to keep pushing the envelope as a thrill seeker. Now it's not so much about thrills, but I am way, way out in front of my wife and society in general on my comfort level with feminine attire. So I still am not sure where this is going in the future.

[marny]

It just makes me feel right!

[Donnaph]

Yes to both.....and my SO loves it when we are dressed in something "sexy"
and are able to know what we are both wearing....nothing like nylon covered legs or feet rubbing against each other under the table or on the couch watching a movie..

[MaryAnn40c]

I find when I go out it full of emotion and as the night goes on it is sexual(when clubbing). When I go shopping as MaryAnn it only emotional as I need to purchase clothing. As far as clubbing I love the attention from the boys so I do play with them. :heehee:

[Empress Lainie]

Since I am 24/7 female it is about being myself. I was never a male crossdresser before my transition day. But emotionally, I am always so happy when I see myself in a mirror, or someone tells me I am beautiful or sexy. Sorry people I have just never understood the sexual aspect of male CD's.

[Carol123]

It is about being the woman I should have been, and the one that I can be

[Elise.Matei]

Mostly for emotional reasons.... Femme dressing suits how I feel on the inside better. For the same reason, I don't just dress but keep my entire body shaved and smooth, revel in the application of makeup. Moreover, in a natural and non-contrived way, I act quite feminine by way of walk, talk, tone, rhythm and gesture. I think feminine. I feel feminine. I AM in my mind, a woman.

That said.... sex has never been more intense and satisfying - even though it is simply self-pleasuring at this point. (can u say that here?)