On friendship & the continued quest for perfect black pumps
To shamelessly paraphrase a quote from a dear friend, the best part of life as Sara is the friends I've been blessed with. Well I had a chance earlier this week to reconnect with Erica, a name many of you might remember as one who used to be quite active in these parts (and the owner of the quote above). Erica and I first met last June as she makes occasional trips to California from her home base in NY. And to summarize the feelings from another comment I've read about friendship, just because two people are TG, it doesn't mean they will connect as friends. There has to be more to sustain a friendship, the obvious being similar life experiences and other things in common. Well like myself, Erica is married with children and career and as such, our respective world view approaches to dealing with gender matters are similar. But more about Erica and what friendship means when going out and about later. Here's an abbreviated travelogue about my day.
The requisite outfit description, I got ready uneventfully in my Supergirl Changing Booth (my car). Those who know me in here are used to my professing casual and blendable looks. Well this time I chose to dress it up a bit, yet still remained utterly blendable as I will detail below. You see, I have a pair of absolutely gorgeous high heeled black boots made by Stuart Weitzman that have not seen the light of day. I decided to pair these with a stretchy black skirt which falls just above my knees that I purchased late last summer as my fav boutique was going out of business. Given the boots go up to just under the knees, only a hint of my black opaque hosiery showed in between about the knees. Rounded the look out with a burgendy colored stretch lacey top from Cache.
I made my way up to the Beverly Center for a couple reasons. First of all, it is a comfortable mall for me, having been there several times without incident. Also, there is a makeup girl there who I have written about before who is always ready and willing to help with the eye makeup, one thing I hate doing in the car if I don't have to...and this day I didn't have to. So she did up my eyes and I bought from her a Lancome sun protection forumula moisturizer which of course was eligible for my fav gift with purchase! Interestingly, although I have seen her at least four times before, she had no idea I wasn't full time. I then made a lap around Beverly Center, perusing the Coach store and the shoes at Bloomingdales but seeing nothing I had to have right then. I left this mall at 5-ish with the intent of having plenty of time to make my way up to Glendale to meet up with Erica.
The drive over took less than an hour, a long time still for the distance covered but it was all surface streets as the most direct way to get there. The weather was rainy with sprinkles most of the way and the iPod was on random. Swing Out Sister comes on and as I decided to switch to hear the entire album, one of those transcedental tg moments arose. Beautiful weather, classy music driving through such a great city without a care, getting that occasional peek at the girl in the rearview mirror singing the words along the way. The feeling was priceless, and it got even better.
Glendale wasn't what I anticipated. Sure, there's a mall there which I have been to once before in girl mode. But the Starbucks I was to meet Erica at was nowhere to be seen. There was a parking garage across from the mall on the east side and there appeared to be some sort of shopping promenade there as well. So I parked and stepped out into one of the most wonderful shopping experiences I have encountered. It was dark, and chilly, but not rainy. The shops laid out about a courtyard area filled with greenery, lights and fountains. And the sounds were vivid, soft jazz to Sinatra which just picked up on the mood set by Swing Out Sister. So having about an hour to kill, I made my way about the shops on what ended up being a continuation of my quest to find the perfect basic black pumps. Tried on some heels at the Stuart Weitzman store (imagine that?) and was helped by the most attentive sales guy...yes, a guy who wasn't weirded out by a TG girl in his midst, nor did I give a hoot what gender he was. All they had in the style I was looking for was patent leather. He commented on how pretty they looked, but I'm sure he says that to all the women!!! I then moved on to the Cole Hahn store where a super friendly salesgirl was most helpful as well. I explained that I totally wanted to try out their heels with the "Nike Air" technology (thinking these must be the most comfortable heels on the planet). Well they were but they also looked like grandma's three inch pumps, no style present at all, just a super basic round toe black pump. The peeps were cuter, and even more comfy but not what I was looking for. Also perused the Kate Spade store before heading to the area near the entrance of the parking garage to meet Erica.
So as I'm sitting there as people mill about, this older security guard comes up to me and starts making small talk. I chatted for a minute, not knowing if he read me at all, as Erica then showed up. She was casually dressed as she does so well in a tunic top, leggings and flats. And while Erica is a self-described tall girl on the north side of 6', she truly carries herself like she's on the south side. That is a credit to her presentation skills and confidence. We walked about this shopping area, choosing to stay there rather than go across the street to the "proper" mall, and decided to eat at Cheesecake Factory. The restaurant was fairly busy, as it seems to be always, and we were seated right away. Normally, I prefer a booth or an out of the way table but this time, we were blessed with a small table along a bench with parties of two on both sides of us. The spacing between the tables was barely enough to allow someone to squeeze through to the bench side. Heck, they should have just moved them together to make a table for six, that's how close it felt!!! Anyways, neither side did a double take at all. We ordered drinks, a mojito for Erica, Merlot for me and eventually they showed up. As we toasted all the good things life has to offer, two more drinks arrive. Seems Erica was given a different variety of mojito and I was graced with Cabernet. After they dropped off the other two drinks "on the house", the two women dining on my left started chatting us up, saying now cool that was, and what do they have to do to get free iced tea!!!
Erica and I ended up having a good dinner and great conversation. It was so nice to see her again, this was actually the third time we have met up out this way. I would love to go to NY sometime to see that part of the world through Sara's eyes in the places I've heard Erica talk about so much. She was tired from travel and work that day so we parted ways just before 10:00 and I made the trip home, changing back beforehand of course!
Finally, some random points about the day...
- The friendship tie-in from above...Erica and I talked about how much more rewarding it is to go out with friends than to go solo. This is certainly something I've mentioned before and totally subscribe to. Erica said that one thing in these pages you don't see is once we take the steps to get out in the world, it becomes absolutely boring after several trips. I have found this to be so true and am so lucky to have friends in the community to share good times with.
- Peripheral vision...I always keep an eye on what happens in this area to see how the world is perceiving me. This day, whether alone or with Erica, I detected zero negativity. Mininal double takes, no stares or sneers, not a comment to be had. Take this for what you will but I've had days where the activity on the periphery could make the most confident of us bend and possibly break. It was truly a great day!!! :)
- On blending, as I said above, I dressed it up a bit more than usual. But throughout the day, mostly in Glendale, I saw no fewer than a half-dozen similar looks, women with a high heeled black boot paired with a variety of skirt styles, leggings, both sheer and opaque hosiery, etc. I truly felt like I pegged a look which had that perfect combination of being stylishly dressy, trendy chic and at the end of the day, perfectly blendable!!! And of course Erica's look was the epitomy of blendability, as well as being a cute, fun and comfy look (the comfy part I envied the most given my heels)!
- On being too critical...Erica was commenting on how she didn't feel like her foundation came out right, or that her hair has come out better before. Well from where I was sitting, her skin was porcelain-perfect and the hair was just fine. Proof that in the close-up mirror and lighting, we might not be seeing ourselves as the world sees us.
- Missed opportunity!!! I had a camera in the car and didn't bring it out for any pictures. With so many beautiful settings about, this was totally a missed opportunity. I'm heading down to SD on Saturday, perhaps with a similar look so I'll try to remember to snap a shot or two there.
- And I'm still looking for the perfect black pumps. Leading the pack right now, the Jimmy Choo's I tried on last month...yikes!!! :eek:
On friendship & the continued quest for perfect black pumps
Sara--a wonderful and very detailed description of your recent outing. Your writing really makes the experience come alive. Kudos! Will look forward to more descriptions of your adventures in the future.
Kim
