I'm TS & I've told my family and many others and its never easy.
But the rewards when they are accepting is incredible. Good luck and enjoy the journey. Kim :battingeyelashes:
Update to Told my Children
Oh my, girls. Some good news, some bad. Have spoken with my daughter on the phone. Sent her pics of Allison...she called me back and said I am pretty!! That's good! I know that a woman thinks I'm pretty as a girl. It means a LOT that she is ok with calling me by my name.
Finally got hold of my youngest son and dtr-in-law K. Told them my story, what I feel, who I am, etc. Like before, some silence on the phone but they told me that it's ok, if that's what I need to be happy, then they want me to be happy. Tears of joy that my kids are ok with this!
As for my grandchildren? Well...my son is not sure about telling them as they are very young. I'm ok with that, for now. Have been emailing with dtr-in-law K. She is totally supportive BUT she told me that he said that he probably would never be able to call me Allison!! Oh! That does, really does hurt. He doesn't want the kids to see me as a woman, either.
Yes, girls, these are the risks that I was aware of. So far, I am being told that they will not shun or ban me from their lives but at the same time, he won't call me Allison and doesn't want me to meet my grandchildren as a woman. Maybe in a few years? Yes, there is a lot of pain in my heart. Ok, these are his children and he must raise them as he and she see fit. K is very good, calls me by name (Allison) and also liked the pictures. I look girly but then, maybe that's part of the problem?
On one of these forums, there was discussion about comparing CDers with gay members in a negative manner. I meant absolutely NO disrespect towards our gay and lesbian family members. We all do know, though, that it is a big concern with people when we tell them about our new life as a woman. Turns out, the homophobia aspect is a concern here. I can't understand where the homosexual part comes in as I have tried to reassure him that I am not gay (just because I feared this problem) and, heck, I'm not really a real lesbian! Maybe, someday, he can explain what his viewpoint is. I haven't gotten a chance to talk on the phone with him. K, my lovely dtr-in-law, asked if it would be ok with him if she visited with me and he said it would be ok. More tears of joy and happiness! My daughter seems totally ok, too. Called me Allison on the phone!! though with a little hesitation (I think) which I won't begrudge her. I know it must be hard for her to say it outloud.
Well, ladies, I knew that these scenarios might have come to pass. But, my choice of taking that risk vs just keeping silent about my real identity, was (in my opinion) something that *had* to be done. Again, being my birthday (in more ways than one), the start of my life from now on, I just had to tell my family. Not out of any conceit, vanity or attention-getting (who'd want to go through this for conceit or attention?). Girls, wish them luck in finding a path of acceptance, knowledge and education. I hope, I truly hope that my children and grandchildren might some day be able to have me in their homes as the woman I am. For now, two of my girls call me by Allison and I am so very, very happy and grateful for that!
I haven't heard back from my oldest son or his lovely wife so I don't know what they are feeling after our phone conversation. I don't know yet how they've dealt with this, what they've discussed between them. I won't push it, I won't bug them. It'll happen when they're ready.
To all my sisters on these forums, "thank you" for all your support and best wishes. It means a lot to girls like us who are going through tough times, even if they aren't posting their trials on-line, to know that there are strangers out in sister-land who want success for someone they've never even met.
Love and hugs,
Allison
"I may never be the girl of my dreams...never-the-less, I'm a Girl"!