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anyone ever go out on a date with a guy and get fully treated like a lady? if so whats that like and what was the story...
also, while out, anyone ever get hit on by a guy or even another girl... did they know you were a crossdresser? lol did you act out?
and any crossdressers ever randomly run into another crossdresser while out shopping?
lol anyone?
not personally yet....but it is a goal :)
I'm newly out, so I'd have to say no, but I'm curious about answers from those that have.
My answers:Quote:
Originally Posted by rmills400
1. No (and not really interested!)
2. No (but that would be funny!)
3. No (they must've passed really well!)
[SIZE=4]Prior to my marriage, I actually went out on a few dates with men, all of which were very respectful. I was treated like a lady and did not have any major issues to deal with. When I said "No" all abided.[/SIZE]
[SIZE=4][/SIZE]
[SIZE=4]In today's world, where I am out most all the time, I get hit on just as virtually any living woman does. Some are extremely persistant while others back away. Men can be so incredibly dumbstruck.[/SIZE]
[SIZE=4][/SIZE]
[SIZE=4]When they do not listena nd tend to insist, I just hand them a business card and tell them to come see me at work. (I teach Karate/Aidkido on a part time basis) Never do seem to see any of those guys...[/SIZE]
Yes, my first "date" was with another CD'er from the forum, he was a good sport and agreed to take me out to dinner with him as the guy and me as the girl, he was a perfect gentleman and I can't describe how I felt when he asked me what I wanted to eat and then said to the waitress, "The lady shall have..."
1 I wish that would happenQuote:
Originally Posted by rmills400
2 Yes but only at the bar I used to dance in drag at so yes they knew
3 Yes again it was a gurl i danced with and we decided we ay as well shop
together as we were looking for the same type of things and it was a great
day we still do it once or twice a year.
There are some of both out there.Trick is to weed them out fast!! An admirer can be a great date and a lot of fun. Don't knock it before you have tried it!:2c:
However, I've wondered about the same things u have, RMills.
For OTHER CDs, not myself.
I think I would be quite embarrassed to be treated like a woman, by any man. No matter how I was dressed.:eek:
The reasons for those feelings r too conflicted and unresolved, for me to be able list them!:brolleyes:
I've posted this a time or two, (or three) but it fits this thread, sort of...
I've been going out dressed since 1970 (an old broad now...), and have had a few "interesting" experiences. Probably the most "interesting" was being taken to the Top of the Mark in San Francisco for some drinks.
This was back in the early 80's. I was dressed in a cute junior outfit, nursing a drink in a San Francisco drag bar, making small talk with the "girls" I'd met there. In walks a guy in a suit and tie. He walks over to me and asks me to go with him for a few deinks. I gave him my usual "I'm not interested in guys" bit, he says, no, no it's nothing like that. He's from out of town and just wants company. I kept refusing, but then the girls started saying "go with him Mitzi". So, what the heck, what can he do to me...
He hails a cab, and takes me to the Mark Hopkins, a landmark San Francisco hotel. The elevator to the the coctail lounge at the top took forever to arrive, and a few other couples join us to wait for the elevator. Talk about nervous... Eventually we reach the top, the lighting is subdued and nice. While we had a few drinks, he tells silly jokes, treating me like an airhead GG, but all the while groping me under the table.
We made one more srop for a couple more drinks, for which I got stuck...he disappeared on me when I went to the ladies' room. Guess he realized he couldn't get me drunk enough to...you know...:o
It was kinda exciting just to be treated as a girl, but no amount of drinks could make me feel attracted to him, even though he was nice and pleasant looking...
Mitzi.
Wow Mitzi that is a very interesting story but, it could have turned out very badly. I hope you are more careful now.
Luv,
Jamie
Great story mitzi! i am not interested in guys either but at times when i am out and am being fully treated like a lady passing flawlessly, i wonder what it would be like to be on a date with a guy. as a guy, i treat women like gold, i think it would be crazy to reverse the roles... i honestly would not have any desire to act out, but its just a thought. lol
i've never been hit on, but i've been comlemented by GG women who, i think, if i didnt get shy and walked away, could have turned into serious flirting. lol i just got that vibe and is one of my regrets i'm going to learn from!
i was on in DRAB once and caught eyes in the ladies section with a clearly passable crossdresser wearing a white business suit... i say clearly passable because it took me like 5 full minutes to tell. I was shy again, i wanted to scream 'i am on your team!' lol but i didnt. i tried making it obvious that i was shopping for myself, i even tried shopping close to her, but from my experiences not being on dressed on my own, (i get shy, i'm sure she was shy)... being in drab, i should have simply complemented her! wish i did!
Kayla,
As a t-gal that's dressed fully, gone out dressed, and dated (some guys, tho I prefer other t-gals: I'm mostly a "lipstick t-lesbian?") for a quarter century, figure I could share my experiences...
The "norm," seems to be a "cheap n' creepy" admirer (or perhaps these sorts called "chasers," and the more "positive" ones "admirers?"), with a sharp focus on sexual gratification with minimal cost & effort on his part, which, I'm guessing, is fueled by ******* tranny porn on the Internet. I chortle at the all too frequent admirer postings on Craigslist, seeking a first date with a t-gal at the well known Power Exchange sex club- s'pose that's taking things to their "logical" extreme- sorry, not for this gal!!!
I take the rule of thumb of wanting to spend as much time, out & about, as prep & travel time, combined (which, depending on distance, etc., can add up to 2-4 hours! many- most?- admirers seem to both not know, and not care, about the cost, effort & time associated with a convincingly femme presentation!), and also follow a "rules girl" approach of waiting until several nice evenings out have transpired, before for going too far (which weeds out the conquest/notch in the belt/one night stand crowd, but also gets me labeled as a gold-digger/high maintenance ;-) But I can't see any positivity associated with my getting treated as an unpaid escort, or strictly a "booty call!"
These sorts are more prevalent in the "tranny ghetto" of gay bars & drag shows, where, unfortunately many t-gals choose to present in a overtly sexualized "faux****" manner, and share an eagerness for quick, nearly anonymous sexual escapades!
With my focus (for the last decade, or so) on more mainstrean activities & venues as part of my femme time, and for dating, the picture is a bit different...
In general, its tough to meet folks (i.e., get hit on/asked out, in a serious vein) while out (since usually in a group, or at least out with a t-gal pal/"wingwoman"), so I tend to meet most potential suitors on-line (guys, more so, as I think its easier for t-gals to chat/hit on each other, in person, tho generally I find the other out & accomplished t-gals tend to be MUCH more interested in strictly not guys, not another tranny ;-(
I take a very methodical approach to this on-line/"blind-dating" stuff, both for safety/security reasons, as well as trying to avoid wasting each other's time:
Meaningful e-mail, and recent full-length picture exchange to determine basic mutual interest (there is a horrendus amount of assymmetry here: guys often honestly beleiving an "entitlement" to date gals half their age & weight! ;-)
If that "passes muster," then arrange a low-key/low-expectation meeting for a cocktail, or coffee (time of day dependent, tho a "sworn" cocktailian, not quite ready for AA!). With a specifically short (1-1.5 hours) duration established, so if the "sparks don't fly," neither is out the entire evening, a not much of $$, etc. I typically choose a spot with nearby restaurants, so if we DO hit it off, the date CAN be continued, but make sure this is optional and be upfront about things! Generally the idea is to wait for an invite for a "real" date as the outcome of this first, gauging chemisty "meeting" (specifically not labeled a date). I let someone know my plans, and often do a "safety call" thingie with someone calling my cell, etc., to ensure its gone OK (and typically go to a lounge where I'm "known"/something of a regular, so can avail myself to the staff if things go south- which to date, has only happened with folks I didn't know, "not taking no, for an answer!").
It often greatly depends on how much t-dating experience the guy has previously- most often it basically seems like "Tranny 101," wherein the fella gets your take on what being a t-gal entails, and finding common ground/overlap, deciding if going forward makes sense. Frankly I usually find myself not terribly attracted to the fella, and simply move on.
Some number-crunching t-gals have postulated, and my experience backs this up, that you actually only end up meeting no more than 2% of those you initially contact, on-line. And of those who you meet, hitting it off, and their not dissapearing before, say the third date (so much confusion, fear, guilt, shame, amongst so many "downlow" wannabe admirers!), that ends up being about 1 of 10, so its quite a daunting "numbers game." Of course, there's always the opposite side of every story- my best t-gal Sara met her current boyfriend before she'd even be out, fully en femme, and they've been dating for close to three years now!
Its great, to be stylishly dolled up (time of day, and venue appropriately, please!), and making your date happy & proud that he's squiring you out on the town, and both relishing the "see and bee seen" vibe.
In both my, and Sara's experience (since the vast majority of our en femme outings have involved just the two of us), going out with a guy (who serves as a "beard") makes it FAR easily to blend in/not be singled out as a tranny. Of course, an out t-gal needs to be comfortable & confident, out en femme (and please, some modicum of objectivity! Passability is a hotly argued thing, let's just say PLAUSABILTY, then!), and essentially develop a "thick skin." Arguably, going out on dates with gents is one of the better ways to gain that self-confidence (as well as enjoying the full sweep of feeling femme).
Most admirers seem to relish a heightened sense of male and "female" roles, and the whole bringing flowers, opening car doors, helping with coats, etc., is simply great.
As to getting hit on, while out, yes it happens, but typically "beer goggles" sorta thing, where nothing every happens/no follow up/thru. Though once, a few years ago, when the weekly Trannyshack was still going in SF, I met, and ended up actually going out with two different t-gals I met that same night. One was a more classy & out t-gal, and we ended up having a great dinner out, together in Cole Valley, but she apparently was more of the "boy crazy" sort, so no second date, etc., even tho we seemed to mutually hit it off, and enjoyed a great time.
As to seeing other CDs, when out shopping, etc., yes, that's happened too. S'pose being in SF makes some difference, as quite a few out t-gals. I've seen other t-gals at numbers of different stores, shopping- guess it helps that we're all "fighting" over those size 11 shoes on the sales rack ;-)
In summation, I'd say that there's a lot of "immature" behavior on the parts of both admirers & t-gals, perhaps a function of having the equivalent mindsets of 12-13 year-old boys/girls that are just learning the social skills/graces associated with dating. But in reality, t-dating, isn't all that different from hetero dating amongst classy, respectful & responsible folks.
And I know, personally, that I sure am a happy gal, after a nice evening, out on the town, cocktails in a swanky lounge, followed by dinner in a nice restaurant, or perhaps a museum outing, or seeing live theater, and in those few cases when things were actually on-going, getting to that "no kissing & telling" stage... This has happened with both local Bay Area gents/t-gals, as well as business travelers here (who often have more evening flexibilty...).
cheers,
Paula
Sort of... it was I who treated her like a lady. We went out dancing and had a great time.Quote:
Originally Posted by rmills400
I see crossdressers every so often around town. I almost never talk to them though. For some reason, the crossdressers around here almost never make eye contact and appear pretty stuck-up. :sad: Well, there is the T-girl hairdresser near where I work, but we just say hi in passing. She's pretty nice.Quote:
and any crossdressers ever randomly run into another crossdresser while out shopping?
1) Yep and two really spring to mind. One took me back to his back street local (English pub) which was dead scary but fun. The other took me to the Tate Gallery, then a play, then a meal. Bith were real gentleman and it was so much fun.
2) I get hit on all the time but I am, of course, a good girl.
3) Yes, but very, very rarely. I know some girls who go out all the time and occasionally bump into them.
I don't go out near as often as I used to. When I went out on a weekly bases I mostly went to so called gay bars, sorry.
I always got hit on and I'm sure you know gay gays don't hit on us girls.
99% of the guys just wanted quick sex. One time I actually had a guy sit beside at this bar, he looked me up and down, then he reached over and picked up my skirt to check out my legs. He then nodded for me to go outside. I got up and moved, what a dip.
As far as dates. I now meet guys on-line. Some are decent but most are not, just interested in the quick sex thing.
I love to get get dressed really nice and meet a guy for drinks. Don't care to eat out, still have an issue with eating out while dressed even though I been out qiute a few times.
It's just so exciting to spend all that time getting ready and meeting someone who is interested in meeting you as a girl.
1. No
2. Yes, a few times, the one that stands out the most is when I was in drab, my hair in a ponytail, and I got whistled at while in the mall. My GG friend with me and I both had a chuckle, especially as I turned around and the 2 guys staring at me realized and ran off, embarrassed. The rest were mostly compliments rather than "hit on".
3. No
Jesse
a cd friend has been out with me a couple of times while I was dressed
and he was drab , It was fun ,
Hi Kayle,
Actually yes, I have been out on a date with a gentlemen. Recently I was traveling on a business trip and ran into an old friend of mine who was working on the same project I was. David knows Nicole as we have known each other for over 10 years. The evening that I arrived I had changed into something a little dresser and went down to the hotel lounge for a glass of wine and something small to eat. David saw me sitting in the lounge and came over and sat down.
After finishing our drinks he suggested that we go out for dinner and that he knew a nice little restaurant not too far from the hotel. We grabbed a taxi to the restaurant and were seated almost immediately. There are a trio playing music and people dancing on the small dance floor. Needless to say, we drank, ate and danced for several hours, it was such a wonderful feeling dancing with David and having him treat my like a lady.