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Hi All
Do any of you girls keep a journal? Or find any therapeutic effect of writing about your crossdressing? I recently started and I feel like its opening up long treasured (and some not so treasured) memories. One thing that really surprises me is the clarity and recollection of all my lifelong crossdressing memories. I can pretty much go through every favorite piece in my head since puberty. Makes me hate the purges all the more!
[SIZE="3"]Hello Darla,
Keeping a journal or diary sounds like a great idea. Whish I had thought of it years ago, as I know I've forgotten many good and bad times I've had while cross dressed. Hopefully this will spark some of our younger members to start writing things down.
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The thought of someone finding a journal or diary outweighs the idea. That being said, whenever I pass on someone will find the record of my feminine purchases. I have a word document of the dresses (80) I own and pictures of the dresses printed out from website from where they were purchased. I do the same with the lingerie and slips I have purchased- an excel documents recording over four hundred pretty slips. Then there's the pictures of the panties and bra and girdles, etc. i guess in my mind having all that information is not the same as putting down words about what I have done. If my DADT wife passes on first, I'll probably trash it all, although I haven't figured out what to do with all the clothes! :(
I've always thought of the concept of keeping a diary or journal as the subconscious desire to have your secrets found out, and loved for it/in spite of it. There will always be the desire to leave the journal in such a way so as for someone to 'accidently' find out about your crossdressing. Such discoveries usually don't turn out well. Most people will react to finding out about your crossdressing to be about as acceptable as a desire to mold dog poop into little statues: Just plain weird, and unattractive as well.
Best bet is a anonymous blog online somewhere, and be careful not to describe yourself physically too accurately, and don't put in information such as names, contact numbers, etc.
Then write as much as you want. And see if you get any interest expressed. Good luck.
I was keeping a digital diary on my phone but lost it all after I gave that said phone to my oldest son, I brought it back to factory settings and cleared all the info on the phone before giving it to him.
I also have been writing a so called book about my life and crossdressing as to the why I do it and how I feel and where I might be heading. This is on my computer.
I am making NO ATTEMPT at hiding this, but I am also not telling anyone I have it either. If it is discovered, then that is great. I will deal with the fallout if any, tired of hiding anyway. I want to be out and free to dress whenever and however I choose. Its just clothes.
The part that probably wont go over well is my thoughts that seem to pop in my head all the time about what I want. This will be a bit awkward no matter what so I guess I will deal with that too.
I believe everyone believes I am atleast a bit on the girly side anyway, so what, I am who I am and someday I will just be me and let the chips fall wherever they may.
I used to when I was going to therapy but these days, I've probably forgotten more than I can remember to write down.:)
I'm keeping the journal, or recollection, or whatever as an exercise in being more open about my dressing, both with my spouse and my therapist. It makes me feel so much better remembering that I'm in a continuum of dressing, as well as a way to help my SO understand that I'm pretty much not doing it as a fad. If I do get caught, it'll be the people that should know anyway, so maybe theres a little of that to it.
I think it's also a way to challenge memory and understand who you are and how you were. I like me now. And back in the past I just wish I could have given myself way more credit and understanding and self forgiveness. As to who I want to be I think I'm coming to the understanding that I want to be who I am now!
Recently, I have started journaling a bit. Often, its nothing profound, just observations on recent events or things in the near future. I find that writing helps me put my thoughts and experiences into some sort of perspective in a clear and organized manner.
No.... I don't think need therapy..... Others may disagree. Lol.
Iaways thought about it but as they say, "The road to Hell is paved with good intentions".
Makes you wonder what kind of intentions pave the road to Heaven.Quote:
Originally Posted by BLUE ORCHID
I have been keeping a diary on my computer since 2000, and in a hardback notebook back to1996, listing what I bought, where, reactions, what I wore and so on. I also have catalogues of all my tops, skirts and dresses, listing where I bought them, cost (and original cost - I buy most things in sales), where worn and photographed. Everything is password protected. Every time I go out I try to wear something I haven't worn in public before i don't know why - it makes more sense to get a lot of wear out of the more expensive items that have been admired. I document the buying of everything, stays in hotels, and trips to the beautician, but have no catalogues of my lingerie, scarves or jewellery, and don't really maintain the shoes catalogue. This way I know exactly how many skirts and dresses I own, and I record what things go together (or don't work).
I consult these documents quite a lot, but I rarely sit down and read them. And yes, it is all backed up. I also know many will regard this as a complete waste of time, but for me it is part of the fun.