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I was out with my wife doing some shopping the other day when I saw a stunning Purple velvet skirt that I really liked the look of, potentially my size too. Sadly being in the closet, I couldn't get a close look at it let alone buy it...
Any others have this happen and do you find it equally frustrating.
Yes! There is a Star Wars maxi dress at the mall that I would love. I keep mentioning isn't on sale to my wife, but she's not the maxi dress type. It's very frustrating.
I guess we can assume that neither of your wives/SO's know about your CDing. Even before My SO knew anything about how far down this rabbit hole things went, I would look at anything i wanted to look at after awhile. It will come in time. People really don't care what it is your looking at or buying. It could be a gift or something but ultimately in the end, it's none of their business who it is for or why your buying it. You just need to get past that point of "everyone's watching me".
My SO knows and is accepting but I get it! She knows I'm a big girl ...and if I want something...I get it (myself) 😊
I'm with robin...if need be go shopping alone and if you like it get it.
My wife has great taste in clothes but it is hers and not mine...when we shop together most of what she recommends for me is not my style...still trying to find a graceful way to say "no dear, not that one"
If I see something that I really like I will do one of two things: go back and shop alone or check for the item at the stores on line presence and order it. The real problem I have and really cannot deal with effectively is going up to a woman and asking her wear she bought her dress. That's too much into an intrusion. On this site I wish the girl would also let us know the label of the dress and where she bought it.
When I am shopping with my wife I am the typical husband just standing there with the bags wondering when the car park ticket is going to run out. A few times in charity shops I have tried shoes on in the changing room.
When maria is out I become the typical woman looking at things holding them up trying things on etc. The only thing is I have to carry my own bags haha
I buy all of my "pretties" in drab, including my lingerie. If I see something I'd like to examine, I do exactly as Maria does .. hold it up, look it over, all angles, inside, if needed, to check on lining, just as if I was buying a gift! I'll sometimes even ask a female shopper what she thinks of an item, and a conversation might ensue! I do the same thing in the check-out line (if no self check-out)! NEVER but NEVER skulk around or try to hide what you are doing in a woman's department. If you do, THEN you will be watched by every female on the floor. I know my sizes, so I never try things on. I rarely have to make a return. Now, at the register, I always greet the person by name (name tag) and strike up a conversation about anything, This disarms the cashier! I always request a gift receipt. Try this! Its really easy!
My wife knows about me... not super thrilled about me, but she does ask my advice when shopping, which i looooove :)
I buy my girl clothes in guy or girl mode... I no longer get nervous :) I think almost no body cares if you are looking at womens clothes.
I am firmly in the closet, but, actually buying clothing I have no issue with. The difficulty I have is that I am my wife's career and as such am in her company virtually 24/7. I have to wait for her to go away before I can do any significant shopping for myself. If I decide to go into town, I know that I would need to take her with me...
I buy almost all of my wife's clothes and do it in drab. I hold the items up to me and check the length, sleeve length, skirt length, whatever. Been doing it for years and the SA's love it that I buy my wife clothes.
When we're together, such as last weekend in another city and we're shopping, I see SO many nice things I would love to try on or buy, but have to pass it up :-( But, I still comment on the nice item of clothing. My wife knows about me and takes my comments in stride. I might see something lovely and comment, then she may say it wouldn't look good on her while I'm thinking how gorgeous it would look on me!
My daughter loves the fact that I adore woman's clothes and we comment back and forth, but she doesn't know about me. I think as time has passed she has gotten a pretty good idea, but hasn't confronted me yet. Such as that day out, I was wearing a light pink, cable knit, cashmere sweater. My hair is styled feminine, past my ears and I wear semi-clear nail polish. Hmmm... do you think she's suspicious?
I had something similar a few days ago, we were at one of our local thrift stores and I was looking at women's shoes, my wife caught me looking at a pair of pink mules, she didn't say anything, I went back the next day by myself and bought them and another pair of white heels also.....frustrating when you can't just try them on when you see them, my wife knows I dress, just doesn't want any part of it.....
I used to do that, and yes, it was frustrating. Today however, I had been thinking about a skirt we have on sale. I wasn't able to just go and try it on. I had to wait till my lunch break. I was going to come out of the changing room and ask a co-worker what she thought, but sadly, to much bump showing in front. Dammit! Felt just as comfortable as I thought it would! Guess I'm still frustrated.
My wife runs hot and cold, sometimes I can buy a whole stack of lingerie but when it comes to dresses she feels that they aren't suitable.
Tops and skirts do work fine.
It is difficult when you are starting out as it takes time to get your wife used to it.
CarolBrown,
I know the frustration !
My wife and I recently had a Med cruise and stopped at Florence, it was raining so we were taken to one of many leather shops , I glanced at the skirts and dresses , I so wanted an hour or so alone to try some on ! The views are not to be missed but neither are the leather factory shops selling the softest Italian leather at incredibly cheap prices !
YES, very frustrating! My wife knows I wear panties, girl jeans, leggings, uggs, ladies workout tights/capris and tank tops all the time. However, bras, dresses, skirts, ladies sweaters and blouses are over the line. I usually have to shop for Michelle by myself. My wife freaks a little when she sees me shopping in the ladies department but she doesn't really have any reaction when a few new pairs of jeggings or workout capris suddenly appear in my dresser drawers.
No I don't have the problem at all. Easiest fix is come out of that filthy closet if you can! Easier said than done I know, I know.....