Sort of first time out - what I found!

I?ve been out before in fancy dress or for very quick walks in the dark but this evening took the plunge and went to the shop to pick up some things for my girlfriend. I was wearing jeans and kitten heels (mine) a jumper and a coat (hers). And a mask of course. Four big things I learned:

1. It?s true that if you dress to fit in and go about your business no one really notices - I took it calmly, walked past people, queued in the shops and seriously don?t think I got a second look

2. Masks are amazing! Not just for keeping us safe of course - but really think I would have drawn attention without it.

3. Heels outside is very different to heels inside...at home I can easily go around in four or five inch heels with no problem - two inches outside was manageable but not easy.

4. Liberal girlfriends who support your cross dressing are the best!

Lily,

Good for you. It is a lot of fun once you get past the fear. One thing you quickly find out is that you had better have tested walking around the house in shoes the same amount you expect to when you go out. If they hurt bad enough after walking too much if can make the outing miserable instead of fun.

Cheers

Sandi

Lily,

Sorry to say but the genie is out of the bottle, no going back now, but that's not a bad thing. You've done the hard part and from here the enjoyment grows and the nerves subside. As you say, dress to blend and it's remarkable just how little attention you draw. Well done you!

Yeah gone out in heels clubbing, walked home bare feet, shoes in hand, lol

Hi Lily :hugs:, That is Great, The more you do it the easier it gets, >Orchid**0:daydreaming:0**

Lily,
I agree with Helen , there's no going back now the important thing is stay safe and I don't just mean with Covid-19 .

The best compromise for heels are wedges , you still have the heel but less obvious and far easier to walk in but in the colder weather heeled ankle boots with jeans . I agree heels inside the home are so different to heels out in the RW , you soon discover which surfaces to avoid if possible . Gravel is tricky , cobbles , soft grass and inside marble floors/stairs in shopping centres and of course watch out for gratings !!

I still find it easier to dance in heels , can't wait to get back on the dance floor and dance the night away .

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Originally Posted by Debs

Yeah gone out in heels clubbing, walked home bare feet, shoes in hand, lol

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Just like a GG!

Most women start the night out in heels, but they get taken off sometime in the evening, maybe a little break here and there, or they might make the whole night, but the heels come off on the way home!

The problem I find is once you've kicked off our heels getting them back on is so much harder , OK my feet tell me all about it the next morning .

The old saying holds true. Fake it till you make it! Look and act like you belong and people will treat you that way, for the most part. Some of what happens is they don't even notice you. The reverse of this is if you wearing something that causes you to stand out and then their brain scrutinizes you and then you have to pass a harder test. My problem I had to overcome is my height. It's not something I can dress differently to hide. I knew when I walked in the room everyone was going to notice me and I was going to get that extra scrutiny. People say now when I walk in a room I act like I own the place. Not to say that in a bad way but I do hold my head high and I do walk around proud. The last thing I want to do is walk into a room and be like why is everyone staring at me don't look at me and put my head down towards the ground. That wouldn't work so well.

Lily, One is quite common, two has been handy and three can be astounding.

You do have to watch what your supporters are up to, they will try and steer you on a date you don't want.

Well about time for the second 'sorta second time out. :-)

Congratulations Lily! I was so nervous my first time out, my hands were still shaking for several minutes after I got back. You are right, the more you act like you belong the less you get noticed. Have fun! :heehee:

It did not take long for me to realize a high heel was not the best shoe for taking strolls in the evening, particularly on concrete sidewalks. The concrete is murder on the shoe itself. I bought a pair of wedges for my strolls. The wedge works out great. The shoe also has a noise deadening sole so the unwanted attention drawing clicking is gone. In the downtown business district there are relatively steep hill climbs from the parking garages or bus stops down to the main street with the office buildings. Many GG's carry their heels in a tote bag and put them on in the office. Concrete plus steep hills is a recipe for disaster. At home I can wear a 3 1/2 inch heel the entire day without any discomfort.

YAY, congrats!! :yippee:

Yes, dressing to blend is "boring." :brolleyes:

However... As you've alluded to in Point #1, it's actually kinda *exciting* in a certain way! It's like elevating yourself to a whole new level. :thumbsup:


As for the heels? No idea why some insist upon that, particularly when there's no need to.

I dropped 'em pretty early on, myself. Nothing wrong with some cute & comfy flats, or other low-heeled shoes.

Not to mention that it drops your height, at least in relation to quite a few others. And that ain't exactly a bad thing. ;)

You mention "quick walks in the dark". Please keep in mind that women do not take walks in the dark for fear of being attacked. If we are going to dress like women, we should try to act like them as well. Walking around in the dark, especially wearing heels) is a sure giveaway that you are not actually a female.

Krisi is of course correct. Our initial reaction is that we can hide in the dark which is why criminals tend to operate at night. It does also seem that most assaults on women happen at night.

It's counter intuitive but you're far safer out in daylight and somewhere where there's a crowd. I'm guilty as charged in as much as I've done the late night, quiet streets walks and in doing so you realise just why women feel so nervous as I became increasingly aware of every person out and about at that time of night not to mention any car that passed by.

It took me some years to realise that going around the shops was by far the safest thing to do. Scary at first but once you get over that, so much less stressful, and dangerous.

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Originally Posted by ellbee

YAY, congrats!! :yippee:
Yes, dressing to blend is "boring." :brolleyes:-------------------

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For me it's not just boring, elbee. I want to see an attractive, young woman in my mirror when I dress. Not a frumpy old bag!:doh:
Why go to the trouble of dressing for that?:sad:

I'm a CD, not a TS. If I want no one to notice me I much prefer to going to vanilla venues in drab. That is easy and I'll be relaxed and comfortable knowing no one will notice me!:thumbsup:

Lily, So glad you got out and it went well for you.

Cherish the supportive girlfriend.

Well had the second venture yesterday. Broad daylight, a skirt(!), ballet flats (ditched the heels this time) and a couple of items borrowed from my gf. Again went to the shops and picked up a bunch of groceries and again almost no one give a second look! I think one girl might have clocked me but can?t be sure...also maybe some noticed and didn?t say but really didn?t seem to. I?m very tempted to make this a weekly tradition!