She wanted a daughter, she just liked dressing you up etc... What did she make you wear?
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She wanted a daughter, she just liked dressing you up etc... What did she make you wear?
Mine didn't have any impact on my dressing. She passed away when I was 12. I began dressing at 13.
-Audrey
She thinks it's something shameful that I should keep hidden. But she accepts that I do it I suppose.
I believe my mother influenced that I never tried dressing at early age because I've only seen her a few times in a dress or with makeup
Mom dressed me in my older sisters clothes when I was a toddler; also let my hair grow longer than was appropriate for a boy at the time. She stopped with the dressy stuff, but still kept me in her play clothes when I was playing alone and no one else was around. Dad thought it inappropriate, so it then stopped quickly, but the fact that I had been wearing 'girl' clothes when I was young later influenced my self image as to what gender I really was.
Since I could remember my mother said I was supposed to have been a girl. Constantly... She even threatened to make me a dress a few times to wear at halloween. I start to crossdress at 7.... Right after she gave birth to my sister. Coincidence?
Im not digging the lunch lady look ... .sorry, :( I went a different route.. Something like: H'oo'ters. :)
By having such nice shapewear, lingerie, and two closets full of nice clothing. And mostly for when I was sick, but not super sick, leaving me home alone from school while she and did workded all day. If she only knew what went on in her bedroom on those days.
My mom always expected a girl. She said she had never, ever even considered the idea that she might have a male baby. Although she didn't dress me in girls' outer clothes, she did like to put nail polish and lipstick on me from time to time. She tolerated my excursions into her wardrobe. She let me get my ears pierced when I was nine, and bought me my first pair of heels when I was 12.
After I went off to junior high and puberty started, I think she realized she had created a crossdresser rather than a real girl, and her interest in encouraging my femme side ceased rather abruptly. We had a don't ask, don't tell policy going for the next forty years after that, although I think she knew all along that I was still doing it.
- Diane
My mom told me she expected a girl. She let me try some of her clothes (best was pantyhose), when I was 4-5 I asked her nail polish like her and she accepted. I also wanted my hair curled she accepted.
When I got again interested into crossdressing (8-9), she told me I looked like a pretty girl. I told her I would have prefered beeing a girl, she told me my crossdressing could be a consolation. She offered her help giving me clothes (dresses, skirts, shoes, stockings) and some make up.
But I stopped this too soon (13), because of the pressure of school friends (about being male, etc...). My mother died a couple years after, but she knew me, and she always said me crossdressing could be my secret garden I it made me feel good, even if I couldn't assume this out.
I asked myself if I was a crossdresser because of her. That is not so simple. I wanted to please my mother, and my mother wanted to please me. Anyway now crossdressing is part of myself.
My mother wanted a girl as her first child and had bought clothes for a baby girl. She got me.
That said, I was born with long hair and wore those baby clothes. Also, I remember an incident when I was seven or eight when it hurt (I mean it was painful) to comb my hair. My mother thought getting me a perm would be a good fix since she wouldn't need to comb it as much. Big mistake. I got razzed something awful at school. I think it was taken out or my hair was cut after a week.
But I remember my aunts and possibly my mother walking around the house in their foundation garments when I was young. I think the first time I raided her underwear drawer I was about nine or so.
Oh well. Whatever the causes, I am what I am and I enjoy what I enjoy.
My Mother didn't "dress" me herself, but she allowed and encouraged my next older Sister to treat me like a human Barbie Doll.
She caught me snooping in her lingerie drawer on day and dressed me up in some of her party dresses. After working with me for an hour or so, downstairs we went to show Mom Dad. Surprisingly enough they went along with her and I spent the next few years being "Melissa" at least once a week.
This continued for the next few years.......I became almost her personal maid. She kept me in line by threatening to tell my friends.
I'm sure I was born with Cross-Dressing tendencies, but her treatment of me only help fuel the fire.
Danielle:hugs:
Mom & dad both said I sdhuld have been a girl. Mom never encouraged me I started dressing around tan and she caught me wearing bra, panties,nylons and her Playtex OBG. As punisgment she made me wear the full female going out clothes including heels and makeup, after that I was hooked.
none except i was her stuff
In a short and simple answer, she didn't, period. The few times that I was caught dressing, there was a huge blow up over it, and both my parents at one point even considered sending my to a psychologist because they didn't feel this was "normal behavior". I think my mom still knows that i dress, however, it is most definately a "Don't ask, don't tell" policy and I won't bring up the subject unless she does. <Shrug>
My mother started dressing me at a very early age, maybe aroud 4 or five years old, whenever my dad wasn't home, as she always wanted a girl. Being that I was an only child, and my dad worked alot of nights, this became a way of life for me. She continued to dress me until about my 1st year of high school, and then stopped. It had become such a way of life for me that I needed to continue this so hence came miss Joann. Although it has ruined two marriages I have to be who I was ment to be. Since I work in the construction industry I have to underdress during the day, but on weekends out comes Joann. Maybe some day I will meet that special person that understands my needs, until then life goes on
Hugs
Joann
My mother absolutely hates it when I wear unconventinal styles. She dislikes when I wear a belt around my waist over my shirt (aka, tunic style) even when I am wearing pants. She hates my leggings, and such. She has no idea about my skirts.
I would really love to be open to her, but her past behavior concerning my style just makes that a no go.
She didn't encourage it! She bypassed anything about it that had to do with me and considered it the latest in a line of activity by me that could only be intended to cause her personal problems. I was restricted from doing so and several hundred dollars in clothes thrown in the trash by my stepfather several times, who also looked at it as a personal attack against him.
Ironically the most accepting and helpful people in my life have been two of his friends, or former friends. I think he considers it an attack on him and my mother because I "came out" to them before him. But they are a TG couple so it was obvious that I would gravitate towards them. He didn't even realize they were a TG couple and the fact that they're pretty open worried him about his reputation, as I was always his "badge of honor" when it came to being a good person. He considered it a nice thing that he let me stay around considering I wasn't his child and frequently bragged that he raised me (yea right lol).
Their behavior did have one good result, when I was 18 years old he tried to physically remove me from his house. He did not plan on just asking me to leave. He was waiting for the day I was legal for him to hurt me for real (he has a history of physical violence on his record). So I picked up an empty dumbbell and used it after he initially tackled me across the room and into some exercise equipment. I only broke his nose and knocked out some teeth. I could've hurt him or even killed him if I wanted to. We still speak and I've asked why would you attack someone in a room full of exercise equipment? His answer was that he did not think I "had it in me".
I didn't get in trouble for it legally and they gave me the strength that was needed for life I think. I left that night and haven't been back. We do still speak but they seem to dislike the idea of me being on an equal footing with them. We're not the closest of family anymore but I think the events of your life help define who you are. Whether it was nice or not it helped me more than it hurt, I'm not sure if they can say the same but they have calmed down a lot.
I don't think she ever encouraged it specifically, but there are two things that probably did effect my dressing.
One was that the very first time I wore women's clothes, it was because of her. :) For halloween when I was no more than 5 years old, she dressed me as a 'little old lady'. She put me in a black dress, tights (that were so big for me I had to keep pulling them up!), grey wig and bra stuffed with something. I did my 'trick or treating' like this and then went to a kid's party.
More related to my crossdressing, I never spoke to her about it but I'm sure she knew. Mainly because of a few things that would happen. Once I had some things that were not hidden well enough (a bra, slip, a few pairs of panties). I came home from school one day to find some laundry in my room folded and ready to be put away. In that pile of laundry were the panties slip and bra, clean and folded along with everything else. She'd gone through my room earlier looking for dirty laundry and had just scooped them up along with everything else. I told myself for years that maybe she didn't notice (while washing, drying and folding them) what they were. Sure.
This happened at least once also with a cotton nightgown. I used to hide it but once in a while would just put it under my pillow if I was in a hurry. I came home to see it hanging on the line to dry with the rest of the day's laundry!! I ignored it pretending I never noticed. She didn't say anything either... but the next day it was returned to my room folded and clean.
There was something special that night about getting into a soft nightgown, smelling fresh from the was and drying line, that I knew that my mom had just washed for me. : )
I know that she 'went through' my room regularly and I was never any good at hiding anything, so I'm sure she'd found my entire stash of lingere skirts and dresses, but we both ignored it. It was one of those 'I knew she knew that I knew...' situations. I wish now that one of us had just said something. I wonder if I would have ended up with the freedom to dress while at home...
I know my mother wanted her second child to be a girl. The first born was a boy. She had my name already picked out. She gave me the masculine name of her choice. I remember once crying in bed dressed in one of her nylon nightgowns that she did not like me because she wanted a girl. Somehow I think she really disliked me because I was not a girl. I don't know whether this had an effect on me or not. Sometimes I think my development into being a cross dresser somehow relates to being accepted by her-period.
In no way what so ever.
Although I've told this many times before I'll tell it once again. Every once in awhile when I was young my mother would give me girl's panties and tee-shirt to wear when my boy undies were 'dirty'. That went for socks also. At three and a half I was baptized in a very lacy dress (I don't remember that but I have seen the pictures). Was used as a dress model for a girl cousin of mine. After my mother passed away we found those dresses in her attic. No one could figure out where those dresses came from but I knew. When modeling I had to wear all the girly things underneath also. Was forced to wear girl's clothes by an aunt when I got my boy clothes dirty. Was always told I looked like a girl, acted like a girl or talked like a girl. Was always called a sissy. Was reminded constantly that I would've been called Janice if I was born a girl. After dressing as a colonial girl in the 5th grade for halloween I began experimenting with dress up. After a few months I tried a combination of clothes that sent me over the edge.
When I was caught wearing my sister's things about three years later my parents went ballistic and couldn't understand why I was getting into that lifestyle.
Mothers always know more than you think they do. She had to have known. I grew up with two GG cousins. When playing together on weekends, dress-up was always one of our favorites games. I always wanted to be the mother. I would dress in my cousins panties and dresses. I never tried to hid what I was doing. We often asked our mothers to pic which of us looked the best. My favorite outfit was my oldest cousin's pink satin sunday dress with bows and ribbons. I would wear her black Mary Jane shoes. I felt beautiful. I will never forget how absolutely great it felt being dressed around my mother and my annts. Later when I started growing to large for my cosin's clothes, I begged my mother to buy me my own dresses and panties. She broke down once and bought me pertty blue satin dress with crinoline, panties, slip and shoes. I was told not to wear any of my outfit when anyone other than my mother or my annts were home. I am sure my father must have known because my mother never kept secrets from him. I was never able to get my mother to buy me anymore dresses after I outgrew this one. I know she must have known that I would try on her dresses and lingerie. My mother was a very beautiful woman and loved to dress-up and go out. My parents were very good dancers and loved to party. I wish I had had the chance to talk to her about it in later years. I do miss her very much.
I feel I had a most special childhood. I feel so lucky to be a man who likes to wear a women's clothing. I feel it helps me relate to people and I think it makes me a much better person.
Hugs,
Claire Marie Hawkins
Wow. What things did she make you wear?Quote:
Originally Posted by missjoann49
ladies any more experiences with mom?
Didn't happen! No encouragement at all! More like discouragement is what I received!
Not really encouragement, although that would have been great. I used to wear my mothers pantyhose under my clothes while we both watched TV. I would secretly take my socks off and hide my pantyhosed feet under an afghan we would have on the couch. I just loved the risk of getting caught! Of course I got caught and she didn't like it at all. She told me to never wear them again. But that didn't stop me from doing it again and again. Eventually I had a talk with her and told her that I simply like to wear womens clothes, that it wouldn't stop and convinced her that I wouldn't wear them out of the house. I asked her if she could get me pantyhose. She said she would think about it. The very next day on my bed was two newly washed old pairs of hers! Every now and then I would get a couple of pairs. I was so excited to have my own pantyhose given to me by my mother. Eventually I would just wear my pantyhose around the house with a long t-shirt when it was only the two of us at home.
aww cute ricci. your mom was accepting
I was a latch key kid, and started dressing Mom's clothes around 8 years old. I became very good at covering my tracks but not good enough. I got caught a few times and told to stop it, called a sissy, what's the matter with you etc... By the time I reached middle and high school, she had to be aware what was gonig on. It really blew up when I ruined some of her more expensives clothes becasue I was getting so much bigger. A beating by my Dad, and a Man-up regiemine followed, a year latter she caught me again. rolled her eyes and shook her head. After that I began to notice clothes that fit me in her closet. So I naturally wore those, there were about 6 dresses, some shoes, and lingerie on a shelf in the fromt of th walk-in closet, looking back, as I grew in size so did the clothes.
When I came back from the Air Force on leave that section was empty. Mom never said anyting but I guess this was her way of dealing with it. I wonder if she was sympathtic or just wanted me out of her clothes??
My mom said I was suppose to bea girl. Melissa was suppose to be my name. She used to threaten to paint my fingernails becase I wouldn't cut them and after the first time finding my stash she didn't tell dad of any of the other incidents. :)
I really wouldn't call it accepting. It was more toleration. I think she only gave them to me to keep me from going out and buying them myself.Quote:
Originally Posted by seanmuscle
So the encouraging to wear was to stay home, wear all you want to satisfy your need, but don't leave the house.
When I was about 14 I got caught for about the 3rd or 4th time. Mom would go out on Sat. mornings to get her hair done and that would be my time to dress. She came home early one Sat. and caught me again. She said since you like this so much I will get you some of your own things but you will not be able to stay home alone anymore. So every Sat. I would go to the hairdresser with her and she told all the ladies why I was there. At first in was just in girls jeans and a sweater but little by little I was more girley. Heard things like isen't he sweet or how cute he is etc. Was not allowed to go to the barbers has to have my hair trimed by Mom's hairdresser. It seemed like she enjoyed having me as her daughter!
Mom must have noticed that any nylons she threw into her bedroom trash were "liberated" within the day. She never seemed to mind and once even threw out a perfectly good garter panty, with all the removeable garters still attached! Now any woman in the early 1960's would have saved the garters for spares, so from that point on I think she let me know!
so cute. Have any other Cds been raised like a girl in addition to the clothes?
When i was little and my mom was painting her nails, she would let me pick out a color and paint my own nails. I just had to take it off before my dad came home.
I was dressed in my older sisters panties lacy socks and party dress with maryjanes when I was about 4 or 5 , with my sister and her little friends all laughing
My recolectionof the event was that I was at the same time both humiliated and arroused .
Then at age 14 I started growing breasts as part of puberty and a very attractive MILF whispered in my ear at a party (so close I could smell her perfume)
"you should be wearing a bra sweetie your tits are bigger than mine" .
Again I was both embarrassed and arroused , so about a week or so later .................
I was home alone and as I walked past the open door to my older sisters bedroom , there on the floor was a sexy
black lacecup underwire bra and I picked it up and I knew I would put it on right then so off with my tshirt
As I got my self adjusted into those lace cups , (it fit me like I was measured for it) , I was changed forever into a crossdresser .
Seeing the LLPG also on the floor close by, I took it also, and wore it for two days , then put them in the laundry.
Since they were missed , they were examined and showed "seminal evidense" (so to speak) and my mom made me promise not to wear my sisters things again.
She then went out and bought me my own black lace underwire brassiere 36B , a black pantygirdle with lace trim, and a slip for me to wear at home
the only instructions being "don't wear them in front of your father , and not to school .
It was many yrs before I changed to all panties all the time however.
I don't think my mom ever encouraged me directly. But when I was very young she had said to me that I'm so pretty that I should have been born a girl :) A few of my aunts also said the same thing to me - that I was too pretty to be a boy - facially, if I had grew my hair long, I definitely could have passed myself off easily as a girl (all I need was some lipstick and pig tails :). Even though I pretended to get mad, deep underneath I was very happy and excited. This was also about the same time I started to experiment with cross dressing by sneaking into my mom's wardrobe and trying out the bra, panties, high heels (nearly broke my ankle that first time trying to walk in them hehehe).
PS You're lucky to have real breast IMO - I'm way to lean with like maybe 8% body fat (I'm a long distance runner and tri-athlete on my spare time - gals that do this are generally very flat chested), so unless I start taking female hormones or get surgical implants it ain't happening for this gal. As such, I ordered very costly synthetic breasts from Realbreast.com - I got myself the pair of DD:battingeyelashes:
========================Quote:
Originally Posted by tammie
Girl - I can definitely relate to that. CD is a very sexually arousing experience for me too. I noted in one of my post that when I found my dad's Penthouse stash I was about 12 then, and my first thought was wanting to look like the woman in the centrefold, and more importantly to feel what she (appeared) to be feeling and experience sexuality from her perspective because I felt that some how, sexuality from a women's view seems so much more erotic and sensual - from that point forward a large part of me wished I was born a girl. So I found myself needing to capture that feeling and experience in a very bad way, and CD for me was the answer - putting on a sexy pink or red thong, thigh highs, skimpy bra, hot pants or short-shorts, and getting my face prettied up and placing on my long haired to transform into Ms Roads is indeed a very erotic and sensuous experience:battingeyelashes:
Ya I see a lot of moms doing that. so cuteQuote:
Originally Posted by AllisonME
My mon encouraged me be kicking butt! One time my mother slapped me so hard my face went on the other side of my head! LOL!
I said, damn, I want to kick butt like mom!!!! LMAO!
JK
Well I guess it all started when I was only a couple days old when my
mom dressed me in that little white dress to bring me home from the hospital.
Orchid
1) I was the baby of the family and got all the hand me downs.Quote:
Originally Posted by ricci
2) I had two big sisters. At least she was nice enough to let me wear boys underwear or I might have been demanding to wear sundresses instead of jeans once I was old enough to have a shot at all the sexy ones.
I don't know if it was my case but it could be. If it was mentioned I can't remember. So it wasn't something that she used to bring up often.Quote:
Originally Posted by Karren Hutton
I can't say for sure when I started but I have very early memories of me wearing my mother panties when nobody was looking. My younger brother was born when I was 4. I wonder if that was the trigger.Quote:
Originally Posted by Karren Hutton
My mother did have nice lingerie too, and I spent time home alone, a lot when I was a teenage, even whole weeks after I got 15. And she stashed some of her old clothes in my room because I had a couple big drawers that I was not using. Panties, slips, a couple wonderful negligees, pantyhose...Quote:
Originally Posted by Suzy Satin
I can't believe my mother did this to me!!!!!!! :oD
I had always been attracted to tights/pantyhose. One day my mum had left a black pair on her bedroom floor. I really am not sure what happened but the next thing I remember is I was wearing them and I put my blue polyester pants and white knitted socks on over the top. I was so proud to be wearing the tights and they felt just as good as I had expected, so I went downstairs to show my mum, pulling up my pantleg. She thought it was funny and told me to go and show my dad. I don't really remember his reaction but he didn't get angry or say anything bad. That night I asked if I could sleep in the tights, and I was allowed to without any recriminations. However, in the morning they were hanging on the radiator next to my bed and I don't remember taking them off. My mum realised that some boys are interested in women's clothing (I'd mentioned previously that I wondered what it would be like to have hair curled in curlers and she said she'd do it for me but I backed out at the thoughts of going to school that way), and that if she denied me the experience of 'dressing up' she'd just be reinforcing it in me. So she gave me a big old box of her clothes to be worn only when my dad was not at home. My dad for all his sins never ever pushed me into sports or any of the overtly manly things, but I suppose that the sight of his son in a Pucci dress, pantyhose and high heels, earrings and jewelery too, was a bit much for him. He never ever put me down for my crossdressing though, and my mum was very tolerant. I would run home from school every day and get into a dress and tights. Sometimes I'd sneak out and ride my bike that way, only on the back. My neighbours must have seen but nothing was ever said. When everyone had gone to bed I would dress up again. It was a wonderful time. A couple of years later we moved to a new neighbourhood and I was told that I'd had lots of fun with it, but it was a new life and there were to be no more women's clothes for me. Of course that didn't stop me and when I was home alone I did the full thing. Except for a wig. My mum had a Cher wig, but I couldn't get it to work for me so it was everything but the hair. She knew I'm sure. Would often say that with legs like mine I should have been born a girl and that she knew I'd always wanted a female body. Mild mannered teasing and fair enough since her lingerie drawers must have constantly looked like there'd been a tornado in them. And it was true, I had always wanted a female body. When I hit puberty the tolerance was gone, but there was a lot of pressure from the church my parents were attending at the time. I refused to stop and they weren't happy but they didn't throw me out. Like so many others, it became a don't ask don't tell situation. Fast forward many more years. My dad passed away in 2005 but my mum is fine with my crossdressing and knows that I have always wanted to be female.
When I was younger (Until high school) she did everything to Discourage my dressing. Whenever I would help myself to things that she had placed in the charity bag she would find them and give me lectures about how it was not proper and all that. She even went as far as calling me a fairy once. That really hurt.
But now that I am older she seems to be more accepting about my dressing. We sometimes talk about fashions and transgender issues. Hell, just last weekend she asked me if I had any experience with a certain makeup at the store and she even took my advice! I am also her go-to confidant on all matters of fashion, though that is mainly just questions about age appropriateness, but it is progress!
Hmmm,
Responses to this thread are quite interesting and the psychologists may have a field day with my take on this.
My mother never encouraged my cross dressing though she did occasionally facilitate my repeated Halloween excursions. When I was criticized for my lack of Halloween creativity - all I ever asked to "be" for Halloween was a girl - she would defend me by saying: "There is nothing wrong with Geri dressing as a girl. When I was young we were so poor that all my brother and I could do for Halloween was trade clothes. He went as a girl for years and I went as a boy." I wish I would have had the opportunity to ask my uncle about this, but sadly he died before I could.
But I think there is something deeper in my relationship with mom. I am the oldest of 4. I have three brothers and my mother tells the story that before I was born both she and my father were desperate for a boy baby. It took years for my mother to conceive and leading up to my birth my parents and extended family turned out all manner of "old school" Catholic Hocus Pocus. When I was born apparently there was great rejoicing as they believed their prayers were answered. As time went on, the story goes, all they wanted was that each subsequent pregnancy produce a girl. Sometimes, in the telling of this story there is such an air of exaltation at the beginning and so much disappointment as it comes to an end when the story of my last brother's birth is described. The story can be a long one because 14 1/2 years separate me and my youngest brother. My brothers are lucky THEY didn't develop a complex after hearing this tome repeatedly. I hated the story from the first time I can remember hearing it at around 7 or 8, after brother #2 was born and there were plans in the works for child #3. I have never felt like the golden boy that my mother says they wanted. There must have been some mistake. I should have been a girl. In fact I came to feel that somehow I was exceptionally cheated. During my religious education I used to get angry that God made such a mistake by listening to all of them - even that he was persuaded or coerced to make an "imperfect adjustment" to me before my birth.
As I cast off my religious perspective I came for a time to a place where I wondered whether my distaste for the expectations that go along with this story may have somehow affected my desire to be the girl my mother always wanted. Was it some sort of strange unintended reverse psychology that made me a transsexual? Well I might have believed this true until I started listening more closely to other stories my mother still tells about me as a very young child. She has all these stories about how I was always attached to girls and women, how I wanted girl toys, only wanted to play with girls, do girlish activities, only invite girls to my birthday parties, etc. "Oh we were so afraid he was gay, but we bought him the doll anyway." : ends one very popular story. Thing is though, events in many of these stories take place long before the desire for a girl child or the frustration was expressed about my brothers was even a reality.
So in a way these latter stories about my girlishness have come to doubly reinforce my certainty about being trans. In a way it is like "reluctant testimony and I am now grateful for it.
Aww sad but interesting story. At least your mom was honest and not hiding that she wanted a daughter. Other CDs have stories of moms role? I keep getting the feeling CDs are tied into their moms behaviors and attitudes towards them. Want to hear more.Quote:
Originally Posted by gerigirl
I mainly grew up with my mom, sister, and female cousin.
My sister and cousin dressed me up two or three times when I was young, but my mom never did or encourage me to.
In my teens, a few times she found various article of clothes from all three of them hidden in my dresser, and confronted me on it, which I denied and swore it was not me. One time she even asked me if this was what I wanted and offered to buy things for me. But being in the late 70's-early 80's and desperatly trying to deny my "perversion" I told her, "No, it is not me.. I'm being framed."
I wish I had or could have accepted myself earlier.
My mother wanted a girl when I was born. When I was fourteen, my mom wanted to dress me as a girl. Man I wanted to do that but was afraid of having some problems (if you know what I mean). But in reality I could not imagen what I would have loved more than wearing a bra, panties, stockings, slip and a dress. But then there was the issue of shame attached to my pleasure of wearing those things. I have been in the closet until this day. And I love getting wet and baptizing myself in the tub. I do not understand my enjoyment.
My mother did not encourage me or ever let on that I was raiding her closet. She must have known especially in the summer during my early teen years when I would stay home by myself and wear her clothes all the time. I could have never put everything back correctly where I found them. Mother probably knew but never said anything except for her comments on what nice legs I have and that most women would kill for legs like mine.
Mikka