For those of us who are married how does our wife feel about your female persona?
Is she: In the dark; Over my dead body; Unenthusiastic but not opposed; Accepting but not participating; A participant, or (I expect in unusual cases) The initiator?
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For those of us who are married how does our wife feel about your female persona?
Is she: In the dark; Over my dead body; Unenthusiastic but not opposed; Accepting but not participating; A participant, or (I expect in unusual cases) The initiator?
Somtimes I think my Polar bear actualy prefers Wynonna over ugly.... However, she'll never admitit, as she has a touch of lez-a-phobia
My wife loves it. She laughs and calls me out when I stop in the store and look at shoes or cloths that I think I would look good in.
Over her dead body will she live with a woman but she understanda I am tying to.figure stuff.out so I can hang it up.
my wife is truly great about everything. We have kids at home and I don't dress around them, but when we have an opportunity she doesn't mind playing photographer. like recently http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...off&highlight=
My wife is totally into it. We bought each other lingerie for christmas. She said to me a wile back that she feels lucky to have a girlfriend/husband in her life that enjoys the same things.
My SO is accepting and participating, although it's still quite rare that I have the chance to dress when I'm with her as we're rarely alone.
I say a combination of Unenthusiastic but not opposed; Accepting but not participating
She knows that I occasional go out as Richelle. But we never talk about it and I only do it when I know we will not be home.
Hover at the same time, we went out cloths shopping last month. I was in male mode and we bought be paints and tops from the womens department. I ware these in male mode. Also, we get our manicures and pedicures together.
Richelle
My girl totally loves me dressing. Always finding something cute for the other or something for us to share. We just happen ro wear rhe same size heel, so you can imagine if we both wanna wear the same ones its rock ,sxissors,paper to the winner. lol
Renee
my wife knows but has no interest in seeing me, much to my dismay
Somewhere between DADT, and over my dead body.
What I wouldn't give to have her want to participate and dress together, but that just isn't in her DNA. Just like wearing only men's clothes isn't in my DNA.
Mine is basically ok with it. As I have said on here before, when I am dressed she looks upon me as the older sister she never had, but she also quickly adds that when it comes sex and me being dressed she ain't into incest.
Oh well I will take what I can get. After all, she does puts up with me and that sure a hell ain't easy.
Hi, My wife is unenthusiastic and somewhat opposed but willing to live with it...Jaymee
Very opposed and tries at every turn to "get me to change"
Accepting, but no participation.
Mine is all over the place, one day it's great, the next she hates it... never know on any given day really.
It's DADT! When we were first married she found me wearing one of her nylon nightgowns in the kitchen. I told her that I liked the feel of the fabric, which was/is true. At that time we were young and uninformed. We had some bedroom play with lingerie. We did shop for some nightgowns for me. She bought me some hosiery. Later, after our first child was born she asked me not to wear the nightgowns to bed as our child's crib was in the bedroom (one bedroom apartment). OK. Later, we both discovered what cross dressing was all about. That turned her off. I figure was was about 12 years into our marriage. I have no desire for her to participate in my private affair with Stephanie. I know part of problem is issues she has which occurred prior to me even knowing her.
Frankly, with her non acceptance, I would not even attempt Halloween en femme.
Mine is currently in the dark. I have my fingers crossed that she will accept what I enjoy doing. Today I sort of tested the waters. We went out window shopping and had a wonderful time looking at all the cute clothes and accessories, make up, and other stuff. I was very subtle and careful, but gave her some clues. I'm not so sure that she noticed, I had to point out to her that I shaved my mustache and goat off this morning; so I will continue taking things with her slowly and get a bit more blunt next time. I may get to a point where I may need to use a sledge hammer, lol.
I don't really have a female persona. My wife and I both know, and accept, that I'm a guy in a dress so to speak. That being said she will often encourage me to underdress on saturdays when she has to work and I don't. We have a child in the house so we have to be discreet though. When my step daughter spends the night with her dad my wife will admit she looks forward to being suprised with my outfit of choice if I decide to dress. Other times when we are alone being a heel lover as am I she will suggest a certain pair that she likes even if I don't feel like dressing. I obviously oblige as we all know not to upset the spousal unit.
My wife is accepting and accommodating. We have actually been shopping for shoes together. That all being said she doesn't want to meet Lisa although she will go out so that I can dress. I am lucky to have her!!!!!
My wife know I dress but chooses not to see me dressed. She knows that when she is away I will likely dress. So I guess I am in DADT territory. I am happy she knows and accepts to the extent that she can. For me its way better than trying to hide all the potential evidence of my dressing. I am thankful for what I have. I love my wife and she knowing that I am a crossdresser still loves me. Thank God.
I would say that mine is a participant in that she loves to shop for clothes with me, helps with my makeup, takes my pictures but she doesn't encourage it and does have some reservations. I have not been out in public yet other than driving around, even picking her up from work all dressed and made up. One time we went out to pick up a DVD she wanted and I wanted to go into the Best Buy with her (I was dressed) however she was uncomfortable with this so I stayed in the car. I figured that she has been supportive and I just need to give her more time. She has said that we can take a vacation and I could bring my clothes and we can go out dressed so I am looking forward to that.
Dusty
In the dark which is just where I want her.
Totally accepting and supportive. We do everything together regardless of who looks like what. It matters not to either of us.
my wife enjoys danielle, admittedly i dont force the subject but danielle is totally out with my wife:D and i love her regardless...:D
Accepting but doesn't want to see or participate. She understands that it is part of
who I am and loves me so she accepts that it is something that I do from time to
time on my own.
Participant. but she needn't be asked to initiate...I do that every morning.
My wife has known from the beginning and helped me out the door the first time. While its not always wine and roses I would have to classify her as enthusiastic and participating.
She is a participant that has established limits. I wouldn't call her enthusiastic except for what it has done for my libido, and the tremendous increase in intimacy and lovemaking that has resulted from my coming out. Just the ability to be open with her has been a weight off my shoulders and has brought us closer together. For me that's enough and I am content not pushing the issue further.
Would I love to progress beyond shaved legs, hose and heels to dressing fully with her enthusiastic participation, acting like girlfriends as she does my makeup and chooses dresses for me to wear? Sure. But the downside is she probably wouldn't view me as her husband or a man anymore, and that scares me.
my wife is accepting and a participant.....her only request, which for the most part, I honor is that if we are on base, no makeup (besides toes being polished), no overtly feminine clothes (if i wear a overtly feminine top, then i have to wear a jacket over it.....if we go out in town and we are coming back on base, no facial makeup or colored fingernail polish. I can wear feminine clothes, just have to wear a jacket over the top of whatever im wearing
Accepting,and participation at time. She shops with me most of the time, I still have a problem doing that alone except small things at CVS.
Tina started life with her complete participation, actually suggesting that Tina needed a dress the first time I was partially dressed. She thinks Tina is "sweet", in fact too sweet as we had a lesson about how a woman might be "less that sweet" at times. Tina and my wife are girlfriends (no romance involved) and it's fun just to have a "girl's night" every so often!
I an interesting couple of months for me:
Late November, tolerant and sometimes participating, to
Mid December, we might be separating, to
Late December, accepting, to
Early January, accepting, participating and encouraging (at groups)
Ahhhhh, the value of talking out your problems!
mine was in the dark for a long time. I slipped and she found some things and thought I was cheating. I confessed about it all and she freaked. We had a really rough time went through therapy and we are working on it. No she has asked me to stop completely. I am trying but its really tough. wish me luck (or not!)
I told my late wife that I was a CD when I proposed to her. She accepted me "as is," and was an active participant in my crossdressing activities We had almost 50 years together!
My wife is fully accepting of the fact that Rogina is part of the household. She is a pretty Venezuelan with the body and flash..My 11 yr old daughter is a combination of us..so,it is two and a half girls and a half boy living under the same roof..Gets interesting at times!
Actually my wife is in a slightly different category than the ones you mentioned (which, by the way, highlight the complexity of the issues we all face as CD'rs and TG'rs). Mine is more of an "Not Accepting that I do this; Acknowledging that I do, but NEVER wanting to see it or participate in or encourage it".
To me this is unfortunate, as these past few months, all I can think about is doing it! Just can't get this out of my system, and am actually not trying to, because I enjoy it so much! That's the truth of it, and I must be honest with myself as well, or the stress will come, and I don't want any stress in my life.
Di
Knows to a certain extent (limited by her choice, e.g. she actually says "I don't even want to know"), doesn't like it, doesn't want to know more about it, prefers to pretend it doesn't exist.
My fiancee is very accepting of me; she has me come out to the living room whenever I dress, so she can see me. (I give her a little twirl as I do, just for the full effect. :) ) If she knows I'm dressed, and needs me for something, she will sometimes call for me saying, "Oh, Amy dear?" We haven't really been able to do anything yet that would count her as "participating," but I plan to accompany her to Walmart one day...just two ladies out shopping. (They'd probably look more at her than they would at me...she drives an electric cart in Walmart, and is more of a traffic hazard. :) )
- Amy
I came out to my wife 2 years ago and she accepted me for who and what I am. In fact she was grateful that I would trust her with such an Intimate secret. I can not begin to explain the relief I feel since telling her
My wife is fine with it, she encourges me at every oppotuniuty, she buys me stuff and is fine with me dressing. However i struggle dressing in fron of her even though she is fine with it??? What is with that???
My wife found out by accident, something I was definately afriad of happening. But from that point on, after I had explained it to her she has beocme more and more accepting and supportive. We shop for both of us together and she has even bought clothes and jewelry for me as gifts. I'm so glad she found out! It's wonderful sharing with her and its made me much more comfortable as Roxanne since I don't have to hide her anymore.
My wife is totally accepting, comfortable and supportive. She actually prompted my first crossdressing experience and helped my development. She feels that my crossdressing is part of an intimate sharing that we have which has strengthened our relationship.
My wife is somewhat suportive but doesn't participate much. We have gone out twice with me as Jill. Yet, she bought me ear rings and a new makeup kit for Christmas. She has also borrowed some of my jewelry and some dresses, which I do not understand because she is so much smaller than me. Not fancy dresses and she only has worn them around the house.
My wife is simply wants me to be "cured". She now is convinced that a therapist will give a pill that will take away my urge to dress. I don't believe that to be likely. My hope is that she can become tolerant of my femme side.
my wife totally accepts me as i am.Almost every gift she gives me is feminine, i got a new ankle bracelet for christmas along with panties and two new dresses. She is fun to shop with and helps me with matching of clothes and acessories, she waits for me to try things on in any store we go in and gives her opinion on everything we buy so i will look my best. She bought me my first forms and paid 365.00 for them, so i wouldn't trade her for a new box of puppys. LOL
My wife found out, despite me trying to hide it. At this point, it's a pretty much DADT thing in my house.
Jamie, just a word of advice: you can't hint or divulge this secret slowly. If you are ready to talk to her and your relationship is strong, just sit down and talk to her. It will be the hardest conversation you ever have but the result will be freeing, regardless of the answer.Quote:
Originally Posted by JamieRobert
Accepting, participating and we shop together all the time and share clothing as well as style and makeup tips.
She's asked me to shape her brows as she loves how I do mine.
We go out together all the time and we both love it.
You hit the nail on the head; with the catagory "Accepting but not participating". Those with even accepting spouses often don't realize or appreciate what some of us only dream of.