Hey, its me Alyssa87. Im new here. :) Im just curious, is it good to crossdress everyday? Why is it so relaxing? I do it when Im home, in my room. It seems to work really good for relieving stress. Its like therapy for me. What do you think? Thanks, Im pretty new to this, I've only been dressing for a year.
I dress every day and see no reason why it should not be good. Why it is so relaxing for you, I cannot answer, but for me yes, it's relaxing, de-stressing & comforting. I have been at this for over 20 years.
Hi Alyssa and welcome. If it makes you happy and relaxed it is all great! Everyone has different levels of what works for them. I love to dress up complete with make up and lovely feminine clothes a few times a month. I also often wear leggings and am a daily wearer of panties, and yes feel so much happier as a result. It has ebbed and flowed a bit over the years, but I find it a Healthy way to love yourself and look forward to living! Again glad to see you joined we are so far from alone in this!
I dress every opportunity I get. I'm at the point now where I get out between 3 and 5 days a week just going about my everyday business and blending in with other women. For me it's about being my authentic self and it relaxes me also. As a result, I believe it to be a very good thing whenever I can dress. Everyone's situation is different however and your circumstances and motivations may be different from mine. I have been in counseling regarding crossdressing, and it helped me to gain a lot of clarity and a feeling of normalcy. Perhaps this is something that you might want to consider at some point.
Hi Alyssa :hugs:, Welcome to our forum, When you are here , You are Home,
What ever Questions that you have , There is a 99.985% chance that one or more of us will have an Answer for You.
RE: Crossdressing, See line #2 in my Signature below, >Orchid**O:daydreaming:O**
Absolutely it is ok to dress daily I agree nothing is more relaxing than wearing womens clothing. Enjoy this forum lots of great ladies with a wealth of knowledge.
I always thought of it as therapeutic in a good way. Seems like dressing up has a soothing, calming effect on me. Interesting to get your opinions.
Why would it not be ok to dress everyday?
Unless you allow it to interfere with your daily life then why not dress.
For me it's everyday. I may not be all in everyday with wig, forms and makeup, but at least half my time is.
Awwww thanks. :) Im super new to this, and my alter ego (guy) comes from a family filled with toxic people, which is why he keeps me (Alyssa) a secret. Hes like really like afraid of them saying mean things to me if he introduces me. His Mom seems very sweet though. I really appreciate everyones support <3 I knew this was gonna be an awesome group :) I really like wearing a nice comfortable bra and panties :) i hope its OK i share. He (my alter ego) was just concerned about dressing everyday. He also got me some reeaally pretty clothes because hes like really sweet :)
Why not? Anything that affords both comfortable and stress relief, can only be good. My #1 comfort/stress relief are thigh highs or gartered nylons. This includes the shaving and scented lotioning. #2 my bra.
Welcome Alyssa,
You have joined an awesome community and I have found much comfort from a lot of members here :)
It is perfectly fine to dress everyday! I do it whenever I'm home and after every work day. Ill dress for the occasional photos, but I mostly relax in leggings/shorts with a tank top and cardigan in the winter and shorts/tank and light form fitted dresses in the warmer months.
Some times I don't like doing makeup every day (I should really give my face a break lol) so some nights I will wear my casual wear with my bra and forms and that's it. My wife does not see me any different whichever way I present. CDing has been a great way for me to unwind and feel my softer fem side and that's one of the reasons I love it.
If you have the ability dress as much as you like, there can never be too much dressing!
Alyssa, I don't get a chance to dress everyday. But dressing does make me relax. If dressing makes you feel better, all the more reason to partake.
I don't know why crossdressing is relaxing. I just know that cross-dressing puts me in a better mood sometimes. I've been debating whether to wear a dress today. I woke up and put on regular clothes. I was still debating until I read this post. I will change into a dress as soon as I finish my reply. Thanks for helping me with my decision.
Crossdressing makes me excited and relaxed at the same time. It makes me feel happy like if being home. I become a female I always wanted to be.
I'm sure it's endorfins being released. I'm not a doctor but I did sleep in at a Holiday inn last night. Just lighting up the mood and theirs smarter people who will post. It also could be that inner spirit of the lady reaching out to you.
Welcome to this forum. You can learn a lot here and also meet interesting people. You will also find that the details of how each person approaches and utilizes this shifting identity and its behaviors to enrich their lives with an honest expression of who they are at the finest details varies tremendously.
I'm sure there are some who engage in this in a damaging way, but in my experience they are rare as hen's teeth. The motivations are produced in our brains and denying yourself something that your brain "wants" to do is not healthy. It creates stress, self doubt, depression, and a bunch of other things that are really not very good for you. And each person finds their own way to manage these needs in an effective and positive way. Still, the real problems come when you are denied something that is more or less natural for the way you are configured by a blend of genetics and experience. But it really comes down to management of your behavior which everybody needs to do anyway.
If it is relaxing then it seems that you are engaging in the behavior in a way that creates consistency. When that happens your brain releases chemicals such as endorphins and others that act to reward your "good choices." If it is not comforting then there may be something amiss in how you are engaging in this behavior; that is a sign to use a different formula and approach.
Most of all it is a journey of discovering the way the finer points of identity work in the personal world you inhabit. You will discover some things that seem good but then go sour. So you adjust this or that and see how that combination works. The more you explore yourself and how it works the more you are able to define who you are in the vast realm of gender sense and behavior. Everybody is unique and we each must find our personal formula that both works for us and also maintains peace in our social relationships. It can be difficult but it is always enriching to explore who you are and piece together the good things while discarding the things that really don't work well.
It's really not good to dress everyday. Just Monday thru Sunday and twice on Saturdays. If you love it, enjoy it and not hurting anyone then "why not" is really the question.
I dress daily in panties, bra and leggings. They make me feel very relaxed and in touch with myself. If you enjoy it and no one is being offended, go for it.
Almost every day but not fully. And I do not find it that relaxing. More stimulating, exciting and sometimes exhausting! I seriously do not know how some women do it every day.
Intrinsically, crossdressing is neither good nor bad. Being relaxed, at peace or happy are good things, and if crossdressing helps you attain a positive emotional state, then that is good. If you feel fearful, nervous, guilty or shameful when you crossdress, then you might want to explore why you associate these emotions with crossdressing. Whether you experience positive or negative emotions when crossdressing, remember that you are (consciously or unconsciously) attaching these feelings to the act of crossdressing. And just as you are free to dress when and how you see fit, you can choose the emotions you associate with the experience.
Altho I don't find it relaxing, Alyssa, I know many do.
I'm more like Karren. I find it stimulating and distracting! When I'm putting an outfit together for a shoot or an outing?
The other 1,000 things banging around in my mind STOP!:eek:
Hi Alyssa, if it's not good to dress every day then I'm in big trouble perhaps you could tell that to my wife.
Lovely name by the way.
I definitely find it therapeutic. It helps me through stressful situations for sure. I love to put something girly on after a hard day at work.
I dress every day. At home, I would estimate I'm dressed about 65% of the time not including being just underdressed which I am 100% of the time. Example: Last night I changed from drab to femme at 8 p.m. I only had a wig, lipstick, and earrings on from about 11 p.m. until 1:30 a.m. when I went to bed at which time I swapped the dress for a nightie. I got up at 7:30 a.m., had breakfast, and then bathed about 8 a.m. That's 12 hours. When I got dressed after bathing, I had to leave home and was underdressed with panties, lace bralette with A/B forms, and thigh high nylons. I got home about 10 a.m. and did some outside work in the yard until noon - all the while underdressed. At noon I came in the house and changed out of my drab clothes, put on a shirt dress, my DD forms, and 3 bracelets. About 2 p.m. the DD forms get removed, the bracelets come off, and back on with my drab slacks and golf shirt. I'll get home about 5:30. I will likely not change back into a dress, etc. until about 7:30 after dinner. So, from 8 p.m. last night until 8 p.m. tonight I will be dressed about 15 hours = 62.5% of that 24 hours. If I do change back into a dress at 5:30, that would be 17 hours = 70% of those 24 hours.
As an aside, my wife was gone most of the morning and didn't return home until a few minutes after I donned the shirt dress and my DD forms. When she saw me, I believer her exact words were, "Oh, you've got your little dress on. Why so early?" The "little dress" reference is to this shirt dress that is also referred to as a tunic top. Anyway, my simple response was I had been working hard outside and I just wanted to relax for a while. I am so thankful I have free reign of when I want to cross dress and how often. The only rules are family and friends are not to find out. Another consideration is my wife prefers not to see me with wig and makeup on. While I am cognizant of that, there are times (rare) that she does see me in full makeup and a wig as well as just lipstick and a wig.
I believe the reason why it is so relaxing is because most of us who cross dress likely feel more "at home" in our feminine clothes. I know I simply like the feel of the fabric, the style choices, and the internal feelings of femininity that I experience. I only wish I could cross dress 24/7. I've no desire (that I'm aware of) to transition; but, to be able to "portray" a woman 24/7 would be pure ecstasy.
Is it okay to cross dress every day? You betcha it is unless you have a wife/SO who is adamantly opposed. Then it's time to negotiate when and where you're able to enjoy doing so.
As relaxing as dressing can be, it also creates stress by the fear of being caught. I guess it depends on how much you care if you're caught, of course. There are many on here who would be devastated if discovered and others who are 100% out and don't care. Where are you on the scale?
I dress every day, though not entirely for professional reasons. I'm not concerned with being caught as all my coworkers, wife and friends know about me. Haven't told the kids or my wife's family, per her request, but it is likely they suspect.
I just feel more comfortable, dressed femme. Underdressed, fully dressed, somewhere in between; it doesn't really matter.
I find it too hard for me to dress every day. That would be exhausting.
I go 100% or nothing, no underdressing with man's clothes on top.
When I do dress up I just love it. Totally relaxes me. At times I forget I am dressed up. I walk past a mirror and surprise myself. I am getting very comfortable dressed up.
The short answer is cross-dressing provides a distraction from the stresses of life. It offers a chance to almost take on a different role in life.
Aww AmyJordan, thats really sweet, thanks for the compliment on my name!! hugs -Alyssa :)
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OrdinaryAverageGuy When it come to like being caught, Im not too worried about it haha. My Mom and my brother would most likely be very understanding. Im just not ready to tell them, if i do. I did joke around with my Mom about it though. She didnt seem to mind.
Welcome to the forum Alyssa! It's definitely good to do it every day if you can, and for me the reason why dressing is so relaxing is probably because I wear romantic lingerie to bed almost every night. Nothing more relaxing than slipping into beautiful lingerie.
By becoming another person we can detach ourselves from the problems, stresses and responsibilities of our own selves and entirely unwind and relax. the "Woman" part serves to provide even MORE separation from our male identity and also remove the stresses and responsibilities of simply being a MALE. It also throws in an additional erotic element for some of us that makes it even MORE fun.
Seems that it?d be OK within your comfort level.
Alice
I've always found peace when I let Christina out. I feel a weight has been lifted and I?m more relaxed. She doesn?t have to deal with my stress outside. She cures it.
Oh Darling, "WE are who we are" if you are in your safe space you be you. Best thing in my life was just being CD me.
Marina Twelve 200, You have pretty well wrote my response. All I would add is the rush from being that other persona without being focused on by others. And I have found the fun in the transformation and impersonations of people I know and or admire.
Yes, the Brain ALSO tries to "defend" or protect one's normal identity by creating a psychological "wall" or "Boundry" we don't cross. Once we DO cross it there is an INTENSE "RUSH" that many find pleasurable in itself. Could be called "Taboo Tripping" many get into CD simply for this RUSH, although, for many of us "escapists" it's just an extra part of the fun. It's the same rush we get going through with MANY things that scare us. "Daredevils" thrive on it. Although MY CDing is an effort to "escape myself" and then ultimately "relax", I can also see why SOME CD for the rush itself,
And Stacey Darling-- Not ALL of us think our CD persona is our "real self". Just the opposite. Many, like you, may CD to "Be Me", but many of us also CD to become "Not ME". WE are the "escapists" Where CDing works just as well for YOU as it Does for US, but for different reasons.
Funny that this post and the timing are so right for me today. This morning I had a employee trip my trigger the worst in years. After dealing with them I was in need of relief. I found this post right afterwards and knew it was the reason I CD and the therapy it provides is almost instantaneous. I came in the house and transformed into Fran. As soon as I was 1/2 way changed I was forgetting the stress and anger. Now that I have been in this persona for a couple of hours I am feeling normal again and the day is much brighter. Escape from myself has always been a big part of my CD drive and aides in my good health both physical and mental/emotional. Sharing this post is satisfying also.
Dresses are far less of a hassle than a shirt and trousers. I just slip on a dress instead of having to fiddle and coordinate a top and a bottom.. Also I don't have that wedge of cloth against my male junk.
John
I have been dressing almost every day for a couple years. Just don't let it take over the things you need to do that you can't do dressed.
Yes, there are things I do where I have to wear trousers such a replacing roof shingles and running wires through the attic. And yes, sometimes I wear a man's coat and tie outfit on Sunday mornings. Otherwise I wear dresses the great majority of the time.
John
IMHO it's OK to dress as often as you want. It just depends on what you are comfortable with.
Dressing has always been very private for me, I dress every day, as soon as I finish work. I love satin, and like nothing better than having a bath, and slipping in to a satin chemise and robe (like right now) I spend my days, having to be a proper bloke at work, one of the lads, when I get home,,, I like pretty things.
maybe I don't read as much in to it as others...I don't know as it relieves my stress, or allows me to 'escape.' or assume another persona. I Like it, it's fun. Pretty simple
I've dabbled since age eleven with crossdressing. Through the years my reasons have changed. Now I do it alot to leave my sometimes troubled world and enjoy less stress. If I'm having a bad day, my wife will tell me to go dress up and relax
Its "Relaxing" and stress relieving, because at an important level, one becomes ANOTHER PERSON who does not have the "baggage", worries and concerns of the person left behind. The "Woman part" of it manes the separation even wider and also lets one ALSO drop the concerns and "responsibilities" of simply "being a man" ---- Thus in this state one can COMPLETELY relax without any worries or responsibilities associated with "that other person" or normal "Men's feelings" as well. IT is a "VACATION away from ones self, with the added benefit of the pleasant sensation of 'feeling pretty". Of course, I consider "Marina" as being the "Not me", which induces the separation, and therefore the relaxation. I wonder if those CDers who consider their En femme form "The real me" get a similar relaxing effect as us "Escapist types" do?--- OR do they seek something else?
I'm reminded of the TV show M.A.S.H.and one episode about Hawkeye. He was playing basketball in the middle of the night with his dream world friends from back in the states. When they called in Dr. Sidney, the Shrink, he thought it was a perfectly normal way of coping with the stress that Hawkeye was going through, after all he had made it all of the way back to his hometown in his dreams.
CD'ing is a perfectly good way of coping with the struggles, anxieties, and issues that come into our lives. We get to remove ourselves from the stress and problems that weight us down. We can for a time be someone else who has no particular issues other than enjoying a time of peace. It is by far superior to drinking, or drugs. Even if you end your time of dressing with a time of playing with yourself, the endorphin and dopamine release is healthier for you than other things.
Dress for success, and enjoy your time as your alter ego. Just remember your wife also needs some attention too.
Hi and good question. Since retiring two years ago I find time to dress almost every day. I sometimes sort of partially dress with undergarments, mom jeans and a cute top but I then put on my hoodie and walk our dog. 90 per cent of the time I dress as a housewife or gg would and do house chores and the like. I am at the point in my life where it is a way to feel my natural self.
I find it relaxing, because crossdressing makes me feel like I’m my real self. I spend much of my day pretending to be male. I don’t mind doing that, because I think it’s fun to play roles. But eventually it gets exhausting. I consider myself to be a female who was born with male body parts. When I don female clothing, I feel that I’m giving up the pretense and I’m reverting to my true self. I get no particular thrill from crossdressing, just the feeling that I am now showing the world who I really am. The person who I was always supposed to be. I feel kinder, gentler and more loving, and that’s a good feeling.
Well said Cynthia! I also find crossdressing very relaxing and womens clothing feels more appropriate for me.