Thanks Kim, I couldn't express it any better!!Quote:
Originally Posted by SHY KIM
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Thanks Kim, I couldn't express it any better!!Quote:
Originally Posted by SHY KIM
For me it is both, at least I think so. I love the laura time but know that it is more then an escape it is just a strong part of me.
For me, it's both. When girly I am still me... same memories, likes, dislikes etc., but at the same time I feel like I just put on the "cloak of invisibility" from Harry Potter. I have a chance to go out into the world and be someone new... like having a second chance to define myself. Without being judged as a guy.
And when in drab, I find myself drawing from my girl side... the things I've learned and experienced - giving my guy side a new dimension.
LOL.... most of the things we do as humans is to escapee our reality.....in one way or another.
Even the very word "vacation " refers the fact that we are vacating our realty, it only for awhile .
BTW, later on today i will most likely turn on my stereo and enter a somewhat different reality..... as all music is intended to do.
Consider this.... when a GG female gets "dressed to the nines" , ultra feminine, are they not entering an alternate reality that they do not live in full time? :)
I've always thought and expressed my opinion over the years that there is an element of the opposite gender in all of us....male and female. There has to be to explain why there is a draw to wearing women's clothing or even transitioning. It really makes absolutely no sense otherwise. Why would a young person, preteen or teen, decide to engage in an activity that bring ridicule from society? Why subject oneself to all the ills that befall people who are different? What's the draw? There are many men who are comfortable enough to wear a silly outfit for Halloween and leave it at that.
So, I started dabbling in women's slips when I was a preteen. There was no sexual motivation. I was drawn to the feel of nylon fabric. I loved it. The only nylon garment that was available to me in the 1950's and 1960's was a slip. Was this the beginning of that inner person trying to break out and express herself? Was there someone inside saying "Hey, me too! I want to play also." I've evaluated my life over these 60+ years. When I was growing up in my youth, teens and early twenties it was always something fun and adventurous. Being a boy was great. I played hard. It was baseball, basketball, football, roller hockey, playing cowboys and Indians, playing war games, playing chess, doing well in school. But, there was always the hint of a little girl wanting out.
Later on I developed a necessity to hide. Sometimes being in the male role society has deemed necessary for the functioning of society things are done to you and you do them to others. Going to war is a serious business. People get killed in front of you. You kill. You get maimed. How do you deal with it? Do you drink? Or use drug? Or become unfaithful? If those avenues of escape are against your inner self, your moral code, then perhaps that inner girl bursts forth. I feel it is her that suggests in times of need that Stephanie must emerge to help keep her twin brother balanced on a even keel.
Perhaps I do not venture outside of the confines of my home and backyard because the purpose of cross dressing for me has been escape from the pressures of the current life and the life I have lived. There is much comfort in letting the "women within" out. That "women within" has never done anything to bring added pressure to my life. That is not her goal.
Is it reality? Or is it fiction? It really does not matter. She and I get along fine now.
I'm reality challenged anyways, so I don't think on those terms.
Here's what is is for me: Integration. I have a real genderless self, and at the same time it is bi-gendered. That's 'reality' for me: a paradox of being both and neither. And you can't weld in a dress anyways...
Add to that a love of things contrasting, and a dislike of mixing and dilution, and you have a distinct duality. CDing charges up reserviors of energy that keeps the whole 'me' going through life, and also cuts neural channels through which that energy flows.
It also keeps things interesting, which for me might be the most important thing of all.
For me its reality. My TG is an escape from my CD.
It is very much reality. I really do live in both of my gendered selves. They each have their lives and don't overlap unless necessary. I'm not trying to escape anything as I really enjoy both selves! I didn't ask to be this way but I'm darn sure going to live it to fullest!
The reality is that I am Cross Dresser, there is not escape from that. That part of me is always there. I don't want to be a woman I don't want to live as woman what I want is spend time dressed as a woman on occasion. That's the reality for me.
Much of it is escape from the lonely drab male bachelor reality, being unwanted and unloved and no girlfriend or wife, or intimacy with anyone. Some of it is the lady part within me, and part is just plain liking certain lady clothing on me, that turns me on, or just looks so nice.
Hi Carla:hugs:, For me it's having the best of both worlds. ~~...:daydreaming:...
I don't necessarily consider myself beholden to the clothes themselves but they do facilitate so-called "feminine expression" much more easily, in a way that I am not normally seen.
Consider that Lily bears the same consequences and has the same commitments that Jimmy bears. Lily thinks 100% like Jimmy. I don't have an alternate identity but I still acknowledge the privilege to choose a name to ascribe to that identity.
The female image is still an escape - if only for myself and till date this site - from how the world sees me however. Of course how I see myself also comes into play regarding how I dress and how I dressed. But the garments - perhaps sweet wrappers of some form - do not and never will detract from the realities that my own person has to face by any other name: commitments, certainties and consequences.
Speaking of certainty of death - I'll be cremated when it comes so yep - an engraved glass front in front of my urn.
Me too through much of my life. I do recently have a girlfriend now though, and one nearby who doesn't live overseas. But I guess as I'm still on my own most of the time, that lonely bachelor feeling hasn't quite shaken off yet. Be your own girlfriend.Quote:
Originally Posted by Alice Torn
It definitely is an escape from reality. I guess through all my failures as a guy, I enjoy getting away from all that for a while too. Maybe the grass is just looking a little greener on the other side of the fence right now.
I am who I am at any given time and it's definitely real to me when I do it. :battingeyelashes::)
I'm with you Tracii!Quote:
Originally Posted by Tracii G
Hi Carla, Thank you for your post. For me it is a bit of both absolute enjoyment and peace fulfillment and a bit of flying in the face of social norms. I am currently writing to you knowing my wife is asleep, and knowing that I am going to go to bed with my bra on underneath my nightgown and hoping I do not get caught with a bra on. Silly as this may seem, it is what it is....
Di
Oh my! That was the spark that started it all for me @45 years ago. I was so frustrated with figuring out the casm between desire and reality that I just started being my own dream girl.Quote:
Originally Posted by Kimberley May
And so, the fantasy began.
Having admitted to myself that I am a crossdresser, it's reality.
Having said that, don't interpret this into thinking that I think I am a woman or anything like that. I am just a crossdresser. A man who enjoys pretending he is a woman from time to time.
Without a boring self analysis since, heck, I don't even understand myself, I'll just say simply: both.
It's hard to explain. But I always enjoyed looking in the mirror and seeing a nice looking woman, and becoming someone else for a while. I like who I am, but it's a refreshing change from time to time..
Melanie Ann, You said it well. Me too.
The reality is I'm a pretty average guy, who enjoys crossdressing along with several other aspects of my life. I don't even try to "escape" that portion of my reality. :)
Karen
It is both for me .The escape is being able to dress and kinda be whoever i want .The reality is it will never go away and i have to accept it
Escape for me. As I change to something feminine after an annoying day at work, something inside me rotates 90 degrees and all the nonsense of the day goes away. It's why I still pull on the hosiery slowly, savoring every moment.