hold up here's my stop, I'm getting off the train here (I like the way things are now)
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hold up here's my stop, I'm getting off the train here (I like the way things are now)
For me being a guy is a role to played - being a women feels natural!
Kelsy
I can't really think of anything I like about being a guy.
I agree with how Kelsey put it - being a woman feels natural.
-Paula-
It's easy to say women make great mechanics, plumbers, housebuilders, etc., but the truth is most of them are men. Men have wonderful neurological access to spacial relationships. I like being a man when I hang out with my son as his father. I like being a man when I'm probing the (this gets deep) ontological structures of my experience. I like being a man for that last one due to my strong left hemisphere functioning and detachment.
Right now, I like exploring the feminine, dressing in womens' clothes, but for me the journey itself is an expression of male virtues of courage and confidence.
Masculinity has many wonders for me and I would not trade them for big boobs and a hairless chest. Femininity seems deeply mysterious and worthy of exploration and expression. So, the journey of integration and wholeness continues.
Ditto. Well... I don't have a true understanding of women but I'm getting there.Quote:
Originally Posted by Samantha43
I am happy with my male self and my male life and do not want to give that up. I love being a father to my daughters and a husband to my wife. I enjoy my career as a male, and my male hobbies. However, I also enjoy my life as Lisa which I treat as a second life. Currently I do not get to live as Lisa as much as I like to due to family and work obligations, but I am working on changing that. Ultimately I would like to be able to enjoy the best of both lives and experience both lives as fully as possible.
Lisa
Dear Karen,
I have read your posts for quite sometime and always find them refreshing. You are one of the most grounded individuals I have ever had the pleasure to experience. Thanks for just being who you are and sharing it with all of us. I have been helped by your insights more than once. Peace,Charlene
Wow, some interesting posts on the subject.
Nice to see I'm not the only one who embraces their inner slob every now and again, lol
It is harder, more time consuming and more expensive being a womam. Makeup, clothes,ect make it that way, but I prefer being a lady, no matter what the time, cost, or inconvience. :) :hugs: :love:
With all due respect, :) unless you meant this as tongue in cheek, I find it intriguing that your definition of a male is someone who can be a slob in public. To me, this is the definition of a boor, whether the person behaving this way is male or female. And others have mentioned belching, scratching, or letting one rip. These are not behaviors exclusive to men. In private, everyone does these things, even women. And lots of women also enjoy downing a cold one while watching the game, or playing a good game of stud poker. :) I have sons. One of them always preferred to urinate while sitting down, even when he was small. I never thought twice about it and I do not think it makes him any less male.Quote:
Originally Posted by SamanthaM
It is not the activities that determine who a person is, but how he or she feels inside. I consider myself to be a female because I feel like one and this is how I am most comfortable, even when I am shoveling snow or mowing the lawn, or caulking the shower, while wearing old baggy jeans and no makeup. If I don't do these things, no one else will. A guy living by himself will cook, do laundry, and clean the bathroom and this does not make him any less male.
There were lots of different responses in this thread. I'm assuming the people who responded they feel natural being female are transsexuals and there is no debate about their gender, no matter what habits they have or how they behave. And I imagine the reverse is true for those responding they feel comfortable being male, even though they do CDress. No debate. No ambiguity.
I am curious though ... if this is something you struggle with or cannot define for yourself, would it not be easiest to give yourself permission to live femme if you feel better engaging in all your activities presenting as one?
:hugs:
Hi ReineQuote:
Originally Posted by ReineD
Yes it was sort of tongue in cheek.
But there is a bit of truth in the statement. :D
I could not agree more.Quote:
Originally Posted by ReineD
I do not think of the things I do as either manly or feminine.
They are just things I do or like to do and could care less which side of the male/female fence people want to place them on.
I don't feel any more manly working on a car, nor do I feel any more feminine ballroom dancing. They are just two things that I enjoy doing.
While I don't struggle with defining what it is to be me, you do pose a very interesting thought not just for me but many others on here as well.Quote:
Originally Posted by ReineD
:eek:Quote:
Originally Posted by ReineD
Sorry I could not resist. And now back to the question. A while back we had a squirrel get into our rain barrel didn't notice it for several weeks. My wife said that taking care of that sort of thing was a mans job. I didn't want to do it. It really smelled and the animal was quite disgusting looking, but I took care of it. I know that she could have taken care of it if the situation was different but that one reason I enjoy being a guy taking care of the nasty stuff. Make any sense?
Yup. lol. I was at my SOs house and I didn't have my reading glasses on. I saw what looked like a huge dead bug next to the bed. I cannot explain why I felt the need to get him to remove it. I could have just as easily gotten a tissue myself. :eek:Quote:
Originally Posted by trisha59
But, there's something about feeling a bug crunch between my fingers that gives me the creeps. :p
I must admit, when I was younger my father took responsibility for all the more physically demanding jobs, and the chores that would require getting soiled more than the ordinary. He never even thought twice about it (just like I never thought twice about changing my children's poopy diapers). He was stronger than the rest of us, and he really didn't seem to mind getting his fingernails or his clothes dirty. Conditioning? I wonder if GGs condition themselves to enjoy being pampered and protected by allowing the men in their lives to do these things.
I remember when we were little, my brother did not mind at all picking up worms or frogs. :ick: And even when I am wearing an old Tshirt & blue jeans, I hate the thought of getting paint or grease on them but my brother and my sons don't seem to mind at all. I am thrilled when I have the chance to hold and cuddle someone else's new baby whereas my brother, even though he is a devoted single father of 4 mostly grown boys, does not actively seek to share the same experience, even in private. Hard wiring?
Samantha M, on my last comment about giving oneself permission to live femme, I posted it without thinking it through. I apologize. Of course it would be difficult to make this decision considering we do not live in a society that is enlightened about being trans, and also bearing in mind the internal struggles many TGs who do not know if they are TS experience. :hugs:
For me life is one big costume party, and I dress appropriately for whatever role I'm in at that moment: If I'm working on the car, it's greasy sweats, if I'm golfing with my buddies it's a polo shirt, slacks, and a Calloway hat, when I have an important business meeting, it's a suit and well-coordinated tie. My femme outfits are just another costume for another aspect of my life. So I'd have no reason to do "guy" things en femme... plus most courses don't allow stiletto heels on their greens... :tongueout
I love being male! I like having the male psyche, the knockabout silliness, the physical strength, the sensitivity along with the red blooded aggression that is there on demand. It's because I love these things that I don't want to dress full time because it would be impossible to combine the two. Happily there is plenty of room in my life to accommodate these( and maybe several other) states! I'm a man and I like wearing clothes and doing things that make me feel sexy! I do believe I have the best of both worlds. Its not perfect but it's giving me what I need.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ReineD
No need to apologize. I rather liked the first statement above.Quote:
Originally Posted by ReineD
But yes, sadly, there is difference being wanting/needing to do something and being able to do without the cold stare of the closed minded people in our society.
I think the one thing we as fetish, cd, ts, ect and even the ones who love us all have in common is that in one way or another some part of society will always be looking down their noses at us while pointing a crooked finger thinking we are not worthy because we do not fit into their little cookie cutter world.
It doesn't matter if you do it for pleasure, fun, because you want to, because you need to, because you want to feel like woman or because you feel you are a woman. We are pretty much all in different parts of the same boat as far as they are concerned.
Farting, burping, scratching and the world is my urinal.
I wouldn't trade that for anything.
Never, ever, never would I think about transitioning.
The Lord gave me the plumbing and the things that go with it.
No way I'll try to "fix" that, let alone argue with Him.
It helps to make Shari time extra special too.
Simply put, most guy stuff never appealed to me. i am not into watching sports,getting all greasy, digging holes, building things, getting my hands or my clothes dirty. I'd rather use my head. I like to be pampered. dirt under my finger nails..ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
I've been racking my brain for a while trying to think of any good points of being a male, and frankly, I couldn't think of even one thing yet.. maybe it will come to me some day, oh wait a minute, maybe except for peeing standing up or doing that anywhere as needed..
I've done all the things males do, but I don't ever remember actually liking them, I did them because I HAD to do them.
[SIZE=4]When I discovered I not only had a female side but was actually a female person in a male body (partly anyway, the body I mean!) it was a real relief to me. It answered all my questions about why I was such a different man.
I couldn't leave my old male self fast enough. I never liked the male sports and roughouse thing. I did like working on cars, but never liked getting greasy and dirty but put up with as a necessary part of it, I always liked building things, was an engineer worked with my mind not my body most of the time, and loved it. Later I taught music something I always loved and did playing many instruments privately and in a band or as the church organist. During that time I taught myself to play several new instruments too, some of them very well.
So learning I was actually a transexual came as a surprise to me since I had completely ignored the warning signs this girl kept giving to the previous guy for most of his life. But I am so glad it finally happened. My old girlfriend actually said to me last night that I was really born female, every action I made showed it.
I know the actual MALE crossdressers may understand or may not as I am not a CD but a TS. I never got into CDing. Now I will never go DRAB again, and dont even like wearing pants unless they are totally feminine.
My motto and joie de vivre is: I ENJOY BEING A GIRL.[/SIZE]
You know as far as the whole question of dressing and transitioning I like the train metaphor. Hang on my stop is over here and I'm getting off
I enjoy being both sides, the satisfaction of being a male, and the excitement of being female and seeing how good I can look when I dress as my femme side, Michelle. I love balancing out the sides of both male and female...
I like taking my SO dancing and leading. I like opening and closing doors for her and holding out her chair. I like choosing the restaurants we go to and sometimes ordering for her. I like being the big deal businessman and having the bank president take me out to lunch. I like to dress comfortably and quickly. I like the feel of a woman....the smoothness. Men (even us) are not like that no matter how much moisturizer we wear! I like being able to lift things, move heavy things and drive competitively. Most woman do not do these things, but I confess some do. In male mode I guess I take control of my realm and enjoy it. In female mode I am more subservient, quieter, and enjoy having things done for me. I like feeling pretty and am willing to take endless time to try and get it right.