:yt: :iagree:Quote:
Originally Posted by deborah jane
Beautifully put Debs, esp the bit about being miserable.
Thank you :)
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:yt: :iagree:Quote:
Originally Posted by deborah jane
Beautifully put Debs, esp the bit about being miserable.
Thank you :)
i used to think 'why me'. 'If only...'. Yes, have purged a few times many years ago. Now, i really am comfortable with myself and actually think the opposite. That we are blessed to be able to experience to some degrees a little of both worlds depending on your view. To experience or think what it might feel like to be treated like a gg, to feel the soft pretty femme clothes that make us a feel pretty, to shave and just take care of our physical self (pamper if you will), is in itself a unique feeling. It is not just about the clothes.
For those who enjoy more than just dressing, some of us feel a mental shift also. This too is unreal and special. While i do not speak for everyone or would i ever, i have to admit, i now feel blessed to have this feeling and it makes me a better person for it....at least for me. :battingeyelashes:
I think we have all struggled at one point or another in our lives and had to come to grips with a decision. This is what makes us who we are...if decisions and acceptance was easy, it would not be so much a part of us.
Wish YOU ALL the best in your soul searching.
~stef
Eric Lensherr: They wish to cure us. But I say to you, we are the cure!Quote:
Originally Posted by blaire
Giving up IS AN OPTION!! But you have to really want to do it! In your mind!! That is the place that stops almost everybody! Their own mind! The will power to quit has to be there, and it has to be strong. That is why some smokers are able to quit and others can't!Quote:
Originally Posted by deborah jane
Years ago, when my late wife was still alive, I quit dressing entirely. I just decided it was not the right thing to do when we had children who did not know their father was a CD. I had never dressed in front of them, but I knew and my dear wife knew that it would only be a matter of time before I was caught. The first few weeks were hard, but after a while the urge to dress disappeared entirely. Dressing for me was never really sexual, or a desire to become a woman. I just liked the fit, feel, and look of feminine clothes. Maybe that was why it was not hard to quit! That, and the fact that I have always been a hard headed, detirmined person. The funny thing was that my wife, who had known and been supportive from the day we married, was the one who missed Stephanie the most! After 5 years of not dressing, she begged me to start again! I did, and before she passed away she thanked me for being Stephanie again!
I have a very dear lady friend now, who also knows I CD. I have told her that if she wants me to stop, I will do so! My friends and family are far more important to me then putting of feminine clothing!! Sorry this so long, but I feel very strongly about the fact that ANYONE CAN STOP IF THEY REALLY WANT TO!!
I think a much more fitting endeavor would be to pursue a cure for Trans-phobia.
Marriage is not a cure for anything but sanity and disposable income. :D
But I do have a cure for cross-dressing. It is available for 6 easy payments of $24.99, shipped UPS. PM me for details and payment options. :)
How do you not be a crossdresser? .... err, well ... I'm sorry to have to tell you that if you already are one, then it is highly unlikely that you'll ever stop being one ... no matter what you do.
I have never heard of anyone ever who was able to successfully stop permanently. Temporarily yes, purging yes, but completely be free from those dressing urges ... no, none, and no one ... never!
How long after you move in with a GG, before you're up the wall~ crazy wanting ~ desiring to get girly? .... well that all depends on the individual and your own particular circumstances but I bet it's less than 6 months.
Hi Ladies,
You know I may be over simplifying things but half the problem with whether others will accept you or not it down to yourselves. Psychologically if you dont accept yourself and you think what you do is something to be ashamed of then unknowingly you give off negative vibes. Now dont get me wrong I am not saying that everyone will accept you for who you are, but a good deal many more would do if you were up beat and proud of who you are.
Its called positive assertiveness.
I listen to you all and a good few of you view what you do in a negative light. If we are ever going to change societies views and opinions of what you do, then the change has got to happen within the CD community first off. We should be celebrating the fact that your quite unique and showing the world that you have the balls to stand up and be counted. For some this would be very difficult because its in their very nature to be shy and reserved, but hey there are enough of you out there who are not who could show off a little, have a laugh about what you do, show the world that your not phased by it and that its fun to dress up as a woman. Stop taking yourselves too seriously and start having fun with it, and more importantly dont fall at the first hurdle cause someone laughts at you or disapproves. Good grief I have had a few knock backs in my life about various things and it just makes me even more determined to rise above it and keep going. A defeatist attitude never won anyone anything least of all respect.
I also think that some GGs struggle with their partners dressing because there is no sense of balance. I do think its unfair to expect your wife of however many years to suddenly accept something that she has just discovered, and to accept it full time. I think I'd struggle a tad if my partner turned round and told me he wanted to do it 24/7 because the very thing I was first attracted to was the way he looked in male mode. That said he also told me very early on in our relationship so that I did have time and choice to bail out if I wanted to.
I reckon because he met me where I was and not where he expected me to be has helped immensley and kind of made me feel a tad in control. Now I know that some of you wont like that word control, but hey if it gets you to where you want to be surely its best to go at the right pace. A bit of emotional intelligence doesn't go amiss.
Sorry for rambling but the message is try and be more positive about what you do and dont view it as some kind of disability cause if you do, so too will others. View yourselves more as leaders and pioneers rather than the downtrodden masses who just follow blindly without challenging anything. I wouldn't want to be married to someone who was ashamed of what he did and was very negative because to be honest that would have a very negative knock on affect for me too and I like to be around upbeat people. If you smile the world will smile with you and if your too shy to do it out there in the big world start off by doing it amongst your own where you know you will be accepted.
Take care
Bev