Printable View
I've purged three times. once when going on holiday when I still lived with my parents. I returned to all new bedroom furniture so that was a close one. The other times were when I was in serious relationships. When I first started dating my wife I had just shaved my legs and had to play hard to get for six weeks until they looked hairy again! I had some really nice stuff too!
That is funny! and true.Quote:
Originally Posted by Lucy_Bella
At the request of my wife as a lesson to me to be honest about my CDing and not go behind her back.
I purged twice. The first time when my wife discovered my stash of clothing and I admitted my need to dress. She never fully accepted it. The second time was when we were moving from the home we had lived in for nearly 40 years. I was afraid the my granddaughter would discover my extensive wardrobe. I have since reconciled myself to the fact that I cannot live without dressing.
I've only ever "purged" once. I thought if I got rid of all my female clothing that my need to be a woman would somehow magically disappear, I'd be "normal" and I'd live happily ever after.
The result was complete misery.
I can't express the pure joy of getting back into a skirt, and doing my makeup etc.
Got caught a few times by the wife. Change in styles by get older. Needed more space for the new cloths. The last time when I got married the wife needed the walkin closet for her cloths and she didn't want mine.
I dont know how much money I have wasted throwing out my clothes and each time I just start all over again.
I wish I did not have to do this.
Laurin
I have purged 5 times in my life. The last time was 2 years ago when my last g/f found out about my dressing. She actually stood and watched me as I threw everything out. Now 2 years later she is gone and although I don't have many clothes I still dress when able :)
Stay happy!
Rene
The several times I purged were all related to my wifes lack of acceptance to my dressing. I never purged out of shame or guilt. Not that I didn't experience shame and guilt about my dressing, but I would have never thrown out my clothes because of.
I used to purge myself of alcoholic beverages - and realized that approach did not work.
So why would it work if I purged my wardrobe of feminine clothes? I can't stand to waste anything. To me a garment is just a garment - I am a freestyler. My wife does not exactly approve of my skirts, dresses, or heels - but with her it is better for me to wear them than for her to have to wear them.
guilt and didn't want to get caught. usually I suspected that I was about to get caught and got rid the stuff to avoid the discovery.
I keep my feminine clothes and shoes in plain sight and wear them openly. So there is no issue of getting caught. I guess I don't feel guilty wearing those items. If a woman wears men's clothing it is no big deal and normally she does not take on a masculine name. In the same spirit I as a man feel free to wear women's clothing without taking on a feminine name. If someone drags out the passage in Deuteronomy to say it is a sin for a man to wear women's clothing I can also point out that it is a sin for a woman to wear men's clothing. It was also a sin to mix two different fabric types together - I seem to remember the prohibited combination was wool and linen.
i never really purged either. i am just in constant clean out mode. I have bought stuff and the lost interest in wearing it or whatever, but i have decided i can only keep a limited amount of stuff. I will never be one of these people who have like 300 panties.
I purged once, the day after we brought our daughter home from the hospital. For some reason I felt that I "had" to now that I was a father. Don't ask me where I got that one. I didn't tell anyone, including my shrink, for a couple of months. Eventually I told both my wife and shrink that I'd taken my things to the Salvation Army and their responses were the same (with different wording), "Well, what'd you do that for? That was silly."
I realize this is a bit older thread but figured it would be appropriate instead of starting a new one.
Bear in mind, I did not purge. Nothing was thrown out, but I was seriously considering it.
Why?
1) My wife has been distant this week. I asked her Thursday night as we lay in bed reading our books. She said my CDing is "driving her away". I could have asked at a better time and differently. But I lost it and felt hurt.
2) Guilt- feeling that way because of how I made my wife feel. She's been good to me for 14 years. Always been there for me and been a tremendous support in everything I do.
3) I looked at my pics from my night out Wed and said why try? I've never been happy with my physical appearance at all. I even had one ex GF tell me "you're not gorgeous to the hilt or worth dying for, but I guess you're ok looking." I know, I need to let that go but it is an example of why I don't consider myself an attractive male. Since becoming a crossdresser and putting on "the girl", I have actually felt attractive. For the first time ever. But I was feeling rather down yesterday and thought I might as well just quit. It's not worth it, I'll never look good, hot, attractive whatever. But I eventually talked myself out of it and decided I don't want to be a quitter. I want to keep doing this, even though I ain't a hottie.
Now had I purged I would have donated my clothes etc. There are plenty of places that would accept it all. But I just could not do it in the end. I feel like I've come this far, I need to keep going.
As far as my wife, I had one of her fav dinners ready and a glass of wine for her when she got home from a rough day. We were able to talk and she got a lot of her feelings out. By the end of the evening we both felt closer than we have in a long time and things are great, really better than I hoped for.
With all this said..I hope I don't sound egocentric etc. I am still wary about posting with the holier than thou thread going right now. My intent is not to look like I'm saying people shouldn't purge, or I am right and you're not. I just figured I'd get out my feelings. Writing helps. And I am honestly curious to see what people here have to say. This forum has made a positive difference in my life.
I agree with Marcia. She sounds like me.
I never heard of the idea of purging. I just threw them all away because I was not going to wear them for awhile. It's better to wear fresh stuff when you start wearing them again. After all, during the 6 years I was not wearing them, they could have faded, been eaten while in open storage by foraging beetles, and they would have been out of style and not even fit any more.
This was in 2000 that I tossed everything for a six year stint. Then after six years I bought new stuff again.
THough I am intrigued, what is really meant by purging? Why do people do it? Is this a conscious thing that people do?
For me it was the break up of a marriage, and having to move in with family, that caused me to purge, I went a few years without dressing, so most of it would have been out dated anyway. And yes guilt did play a big part in the purge. Oh and when I went into the service, I didn't want to leave anything behind that might be found by my parents. The last purge was over 40 years ago, and I have never thought of doing it again. I have packed it all away from time to time, but I only get rid of worn out, ill fitting, or no longer age appropriate. The wife some times shops at a second hand plus size store that sells things on consignment, they love my hand me down, and sell my used things really fast, makes me feel like my style is appreciated lol, but I doubt they would sell so fast if they knew they where owned by a man.
Tina B.