The Continuing Saga of Jamie's Ballet Lessons

Jamie,
I am taking belly dancing lessons. I am the only male. I dance as a man, but wearing women's clothes, so I am actually taking the class as a crossdresser, but it doesn't bother anyone. Proper men's dance clothes are not that different, but cost more. Here is me with some of the female dancers: http://www.flickr.com/photos/juno_dancer/5744182306

I realized that being a male dancer really gets you accepted into the dance group. They know you are a bit feminine, but are not too concerned over whether you are gay or straight. They only care about your "dance orientation", meaning that you are there for dance and not to look at women, regardless of your sexual orientation. It is wonderful to be accepted as a person and not just be seen as a man. In fact, I think that a lot of male dancers might have been crossdressers if they did not start dancing. For anyone that really wants to quit CDing, becoming a male dancer may be the second best way for a man to express femininity. It may even be good "coming out" therapy for those who are afraid of public expression.

For me, dancing has been incredible. When I was in grade school, the whole class got dance lessons (the disco age). I was a total klutz, and was always the last choice of a dance partner. As I have become more female, my brain function has become more balanced (get that right hemisphere in shape!) and I find myself a rather good dancer.

I was in ballet like 8 years ago. I kind of quit though after a year cause of course at my age back then of 28, I was a bit old to be trying to do pliés while turned out and you know there is the constant temptation to force turn-out.

And people call ME brave?! LOL
That sounds like SUCH a neat thing to do. . .

Have been taking adult recreational ballet classes for many years now. Taking a break for awhile now as I work through some arthritis issues I have developed over the years. Miss class a lot, but still streaching at my home barre' to ballet workout tapes/CD's. I hope to get back to class this fall, most likely with private lessons now.

Last week's ballet class was pretty much like the previous ones. I only have two things of note to mention:

1) On my way to class, one of my co-workers saw me and said "You look like you're going to work out." I simply shook my head and said "Yup." The next day he asked about my workout and I told him that I was taking a ballet class. He mentioned that he was thinking about taking a yoga class, but was worried that it might be a little weird for a guy to take it. This is the first time I told another guy I was taking ballet.

2) Our dance instructor is offering Ballet 2 after this session completes. She particularly encouraged our class to sign up for it. However, I had my doubts; I feel like I'm at the bottom of the class. Most of them can do turns, while I cannot. I asked her to tell me honestly if she thought I was ready. She said I needed to still work on my fundamentals, but said that she thought I had a lot of natural ability. I was a little hurt because I was hoping to advance, but in my heart I know she is right.

Oh, and a few responses to those of you who were kind enough to post last week...

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Originally Posted by juno

Jamie,
I am taking belly dancing lessons. I am the only male. I dance as a man, but wearing women's clothes, so I am actually taking the class as a crossdresser, but it doesn't bother anyone. Proper men's dance clothes are not that different, but cost more. Here is me with some of the female dancers: http://www.flickr.com/photos/juno_dancer/5744182306

I realized that being a male dancer really gets you accepted into the dance group. They know you are a bit feminine, but are not too concerned over whether you are gay or straight. They only care about your "dance orientation", meaning that you are there for dance and not to look at women, regardless of your sexual orientation. It is wonderful to be accepted as a person and not just be seen as a man. In fact, I think that a lot of male dancers might have been crossdressers if they did not start dancing. For anyone that really wants to quit CDing, becoming a male dancer may be the second best way for a man to express femininity. It may even be good "coming out" therapy for those who are afraid of public expression.

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Juno, I think it is so great that you are taking belly dancing lessons. I agree that being a male dancer does help you get accepted into a group of women.

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Originally Posted by Nicole Erin

I was in ballet like 8 years ago. I kind of quit though after a year cause of course at my age back then of 28, I was a bit old to be trying to do pliés while turned out and you know there is the constant temptation to force turn-out.

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Nicole, sorry you had to quit. Certainly one has to take care of their body, and ballet can be rough on it. However, one doesn't have to be young to do it, as long as they know their limitations and are careful. I am quite a few years over 28 myself.

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Originally Posted by Sarah V

Have been taking adult recreational ballet classes for many years now. Taking a break for awhile now as I work through some arthritis issues I have developed over the years. Miss class a lot, but still streaching at my home barre' to ballet workout tapes/CD's. I hope to get back to class this fall, most likely with private lessons now.

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That would be great if you get back into it. I find ballet to be great exercise; in fact its the only regular exercise regimen I've ever looked forward to.

It's been a while since I've given a ballet update. I've been in the next session for a number of weeks now. After the last session, which was somewhat advanced, this one is more basic. However, don't get me wrong, I'm still learning a lot, and improving my fundamentals. I don't have to worry too much about trying to figure out what I'm supposed to do, or keeping up. A lot of my classmates are taking it for the first time, and that gives me a leg up. One thing I've noticed is my flexibility is greatly improved. I am about 6 inches away from be able to do a full split.

Thanks for the updates, Jamie. I'm CERTAIN u r encouraging a number of members here to try dancing. A decidedly un-male activity, as I recall.

Just a note to u and everyone:
I'm over 60 and STILL have flexibilities I developed in yoga classes taken in my 20's! Also, I don't work out any more, but do core strengthening excersizes and STRETCHES every morning, first thing! How does this pay off? I recently took a header off a chair I was standing on and badly bruised my leg. While being the first in our tour group 2 weeks ago to go down a water slide, I had an accident. I did a 180 half way down, banged my head on the side and went into the pool spinning!

In both cases I expected to come up with damage from the twisting, like a bad neck, back, knee, or elbow the following day. But, NOTHING except the sore leg and a small bump on the head! I still have flexibility. And, it must be because of my daily stretching! Try it, I think you'll feel better and be able to continue activities when others your age r couch potatoes!

Jamie, so glad your ballet classes are going well. I know what you mean by saying it's the only regular exercise you ever looked forward too. I felt the same taking class with my gf for two years. And for those two hours one night a week, they treated me like just one of the girls since I was the only guy. I so enjoyed being able to go to class in leotards and tights just like them and seeing us all dancing in front of the big mirror in our leotards. As long as you are just fitting in and not dancing a pas de deaux, I think they will be glad to have you learn the dance with them in feminine dance attire. We had a lot of fun with just a little teasing. Give it a try.

So this week I decided to drop in on a Ballet II class in addition to the beginner class that I took. I spent two-and-a-half hours dancing in one evening. The instructor has definitely stepped up the pace a little bit in the beginner class, but I think I managed to do well. During class stretches, she comments on my improved flexibility (see previous post). We had a lot of jumps and fast-paced floor work, so by the end of class I worked up a good sweat.

The Ballet II class was quite the eye-opener. First, it was cool siting outside the studio and talking with the girls who take the class. They are much more serious about dance than most of the students in the other class, at least two of them are currently dance majors with aspirations to perform in a company or become dance instructors. It felt nice to be accepted into this group, and one (who also takes the beginner class as a warmup) even told me, "It's amazing how far you've come in a short time. I'm jealous of your natural turnout. Just imagine if you started when you were younger." Still, I knew I was going to be diving off the deep end, and joked "I'm here to provide comedic relief for the rest of you."

When class started, I was placed in the middle of the barre, so that no matter which way we were facing, I'd have someone I could copy. This was a big help because the combinations were more complex, and often only given to us once before we were expected to perform them. Still, I kept up pretty well, and when I fell behind was able to get myself back on track. Where I struggled was when we moved to do "center work" which is where the actual dancing occurs. They were doing jumps and turns I've never learned so I just approximated the best I could. It looked like a lot of fun, and I long to get to the point where I can dance like that. At the end, the instructor said to me "Congratulations, you made it and did very well." This made me feel proud. I know I was far from perfect, but I did my best, and I think that I was not too bad for someone new to that level of difficulty. I'm certainly not ready to move up to Ballet II officially, but maybe by next summer I could.

I'll leave you with a slightly amusing anecdote: This happened before I class, when I was changing into my ballet attire (black tights and white performance tee). As I pulled the tights up my left leg I looked down and noticed that I still had my boxers on. :eek: Boxers would look really funny under tights, not to mention that one could get seriously injured if you dance without support! Fortunately, I was able to slide the boxers down over the tights (since one of the legs of the tights was just dangling free), slide my dance belt on, and then finally put my right leg in my tights.

I was really surprised that after my double-ballet night last week I did not feel very sore. This week was the last class of the current session, and sadly, there won't be another class for about a month. I think class went really well, seeing the intermediate class helped me understand where this was all going, and made me work harder because I really want to be able to do the jumps and turns they were doing. I'm getting better at the floor combinations, but that is still my weakest point.

In other news, I've been stretching on my own, and have now got the splits so that I am only 3 inches off the ground. While standing I can kick one extended leg to be at about 105 degree angle from the other, and I can reach up to about a 120 degree angle if I set my foot on a tall dresser.

I think it's great you are doing something you enjoy and keeps you fit not to mention the gracefulness factor. I took a class last summer, not ballet, but burlesque which was really fun. More forgiving than ballet, I don't think I have the skill for that, but a great workout nonetheless.

At first I felt a little akward being the only guy. But by the third week of the eight classes, the girls were very accepting. I think they saw I was there to dance and not to ogle them. About that third week I was wearing heels during class and we were working on a routine that involved removing your bra. Not to worry we had leotards underneath. I didn't go in full girl mode to the classes but everyone was fine as we learned different routines with glove peels, feather boas, stocking peels, and even tassel twirling. It was so much fun.

The final class was a recital for family and friends where I did perform fully en femme. It was very liberating and I'm thinking about doing it again this Fall. For any CD's looking for a fun time while dressed I would highly recommend this option. Just find a group and check with the instructor beforehand.

Wow! Impressive flexibility Jamie. Very cool.

We finally started our new ballet session. I was definitely rusty after not practicing since the last class. However, we did fairly basic stuff, so it wasn't too hard. Once again I am the only male-bodied person, in a class of about 30.

I've mentioned before that our class is held in a very strange building. You have to walk through the basketball courts to get to the dance studio. Usually, there is a class before ours in the studio, so we have to wait in a hall outside the basketball courts. So I was sitting on the floor against the wall, along with a number of women in their tights, leotards and ballet shoes, when a bunch of guys came out to get a drink from the water fountain. I don't know if it was because I was sitting on the floor or what, but these guys seemed huge. At once, I felt both a little intimidated and happy. I knew that I was more like the women both physically and mentally, and that I fit in better wearing tights in the dance class than I would have playing basketball with the guys. As far as I know, none of the guys paid any attention to me. I don't know if it was because they didn't notice me, or they assumed I was a boyish girl, or they were enlightened enough not to care if a guy took ballet. Whichever it was, I appreciated not getting stared at, or worse yet, taunted.

In flexibility news: I am now about an inch away from doing the complete splits. I think the loosening of my hips is helping with my feminine walk. I just seem to have a more graceful tilt and sway. In fact, there are times where I worry if I might accidentally be walking too girly when in boy mode! :eek:

I haven't had a chance to write much, but have still been going to dance class once a week. We actually had three guys one time (well, two guys and me). One of them even came back for a second class. I was the only guy wearing tights, but I've never heard anyone comment about them.

Last week, we were practicing a dance that requires you to travel from one corner of the room to another. We had to do it in groups of four. I was about to join a group of three ladies, when the teacher says, "No, those are the pretty flowers in pink tutus, you need to go across with the boys" (note, there was only one other guy in class at the time, so the "boys" was a very small group, also no one is under the age of 21, nor was anyone wearing a tutu). I wanted to say, "What if I want to be one of the flowers in a pink tutu?" but bit my tongue. This is the first time in almost two years where she has distinguished the boys from the girls. Fortunately, other than the grouping, there's only a slightly different way to walk, which we don't actually do very often. So while she sees me as the confident male dancer in black tights and white tee, I'll continue to see myself as the graceful ballerina in pink leotard, tights and poofy tutu.

BTW, not much progress on the flexibility front. I realized when I said I was an inch away, I did not have my legs properly at 180 degrees. I still have maybe two inches to go when I have them fully extended.

Jamie

Hi Jamie

Never responded before but I love your updates on ballet classes. I took ballet for about 3 years running in college, a few classes after and sporadically ever since. I think it's the fall weather and back-to-school feeling that makes we want to look into dance lessons again. I always felt I was an okay student but never really had the rhythm and coordination to really go at it. Of course one class a week just doesn't cut it. If I were to go back it'd be an all in proposition (pending wife approval).

I love love love the ballet, and (is evident since we're on this forum) of course all the clothes that dancers wear. In college I used to underdress in sheer tights and thong leotard under my "manly" unitard and t shirt on colder days. But after a while as you know the clothes and appearance fall away and it's your body and movement that really begin to matter. In my mind I'd be in seamed pink tights and tutu but only until barre and floor work began.

It's really inspirational to hear about the obvious roadblocks, illness, lack of flexibility, age, acceptance and in general life. I'm way past the age where I'd think of doing it full time, and have a lot of fun watching my daughter do it. She's amazing!
Please keep up the posts and keep going to class. Some of us here are secretly covetous, but mainly proud that've got the grit to keep going. I agree that ballet gave me some outlet other than dressing to express my feminine side, and I'll never forget my last class where the instructor said to me (as the only male in class) "you're dancing the girls parts here as I don't have the class time to teach both" admittedly I was thrilled. Was I picturing myself in a beautiful tutu and pointeshoes as awakened the combination across the floor? You bet!

Maybe someday I'll be able to post my class experiences here too.

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Originally Posted by Darla

Never responded before but I love your updates on ballet classes.

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Thanks for the response. I sometimes wonder if I'm posting into the circular file.

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But after a while as you know the clothes and appearance fall away and it's your body and movement that really begin to matter. In my mind I'd be in seamed pink tights and tutu but only until barre and floor work began.

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I know. Once we start work, I completely forget what I'm wearing. By the way, when I first started doing it, I would keep my tights on for the rest of the night just because I had an excuse to be wearing them. But after a while, I'd get home and say, "Let's get these sweaty things off!"

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Please keep up the posts and keep going to class. Some of us here are secretly covetous, but mainly proud that've got the grit to keep going. I agree that ballet gave me some outlet other than dressing to express my feminine side, and I'll never forget my last class where the instructor said to me (as the only male in class) "you're dancing the girls parts here as I don't have the class time to teach both" admittedly I was thrilled. Was I picturing myself in a beautiful tutu and pointeshoes as awakened the combination across the floor? You bet!

Maybe someday I'll be able to post my class experiences here too.

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I hope you will some day.

Hi Jamie,

It's great to see that you continue with the ballet lessons. I have also continued with mine, attending two classes each week. One is with a school located in the suburban Oslo, while the second is in downtown Oslo.

This summer the first school also offered a 7-week course for all ages and levels. Of course I couldn't resist. The teacher was the very one I had in my first ever class nearly two years ago. She told me that she could see that I had continued practising. That was a big confidence boost. So I will continue as long as my body don't complain.

It's great to hear you're keeping up with it, Camilla. I'm envious that you get two classes per week. Right now, family obligations and budget stand in the way of me doing more than once a week, but someday.... I hear that taking multiple classes is the fastest way to improve. That must have felt great to get the encouragement from your teacher.

This thread has insipred me. I've started doing ballet exercises and I feel much stronger. It's only been a couple of days but I feel the improvement. I'm mostly working on my legs with plie exercises but also will be focusing on the muscles between my shoulder blades. I've also ordered some totally to die for backseamed ballet tights to add to my dancewear collection. But now it's for fitness too.

Well good luck with your class and I like the Idea of the outfit for ballet but I am not really into Dance that much.

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Originally Posted by RiverdanceGirl

This thread has insipred me. I've started doing ballet exercises and I feel much stronger. It's only been a couple of days but I feel the improvement. I'm mostly working on my legs with plie exercises but also will be focusing on the muscles between my shoulder blades. I've also ordered some totally to die for backseamed ballet tights to add to my dancewear collection. But now it's for fitness too.

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That's great! However, when doing ballet exercises on your own, it's important to be careful. If you do them wrong, you could hurt yourself. I hope you have a good instructive DVD and/or book. When doing plies, remember the turnout comes from the thighs not the knees or ankles. It's okay if your feet don't form a 180 degree angle. The most important thing is that when you bend, your knees are pointing in exactly the same direction as your feet. If not, adjust your feet so that they'll be under your knees.

p.s. Your new ballet tights sound great! Exercise is so much more fun when you have pretty clothes.

Thanks Jamie for the tip. I've got my instruction from carefully chosen YouTube clips but they didn't mention what you said about feet and knees. I hope I've been automatically doing it right because I'd feel a strain otherwise but I'll make sure in future. It really is amazing what ballet can do for your body. My stomach was noticeably flatter in just a couple of days. I've always had the blessing of being naturally skinny but in the past few months I'd been developing a bit of a belly. Right now it's as toned as when I was in my late twenties ( I'm 44 now). I'm also doing the arm position exercises. The tights are Mondor style 301. The seams go from the waistband right down to the reciprocated toe. I can feel the seams under my feet when I move and it feels exquisite. They are the fully footed, which as I'm sure you know is hard to find with a backseam. All my ballet tights are Mondor. I wear them with my simple black short sleeved leotard. I really envy you for going to real ballet classes and being accepted by the women as one of them.

So after a three week hiatus from class (due to a combination of illness, business trip and the class schedule), I was back in class this week. I was a little bit rusty, but felt like I did okay. At one point the teacher said to me, "You have such pretty feet, you need to make them move more." (I wasn't properly pointing them between each step of a movement known as a balance).

To make up for my absence, I took the jazz dance class that is just after the ballet class. I've never taken jazz dance before, but it was really fun. This was very contemporary, we warmed up to some techno music and then learned a dance to Michael Jackson's "Billie Jean." At one point, the teacher taught us the "Vegas step," presumably named so because it is staple of Vegas showgirls. She joked, "I doubt {my male name} will ever be asked to perform the Vegas step, but we'll learn it anyway." The whole time we practiced the step I was picturing myself in a showgirl costume. I learned a lot in the class, and have filed it away for the next time I perform in a drag show (I've been in two shows for charity). I look forward to taking the class again next week.

Jamie I am happy for you enjoying ballet and I am somewhat envious of anyone that can dance. Last time I tried to dance it was not a pretty site.

I have always wanted to do ballet, but never actually thought about doing it until now. Looks like I have some research to do...