CDers creating their own identity

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Originally Posted by Brenda.Clark

I feel that there is a distinct place for CDs who do not have gender identity issues but just like to dress up. That's me. I have a male gender identity. No dysphoria. I like to occasionally wear female clothes, make up and a wig because it's fun.

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If you were to google "crossdresser" and tally all the websites that show up on the search page, you'd find millions, literally millions of websites that cater to men who do this for other reasons than identity, and only a handful of websites like this one (cd.com), where other things than the sexual or fun aspect of the CDing are discussed. This is an indication that most CDers do identify as men and they do this for fun and/or for sex, and it goes no further than that. I don't know why the CDers who hang out in this particular forum should think any differently or question whether or not the majority of CDers have identity issues?

I get the identity point of the OP and I "identify" with it. My CD clothes are dresses and skirts with blouses. I wear heels. My wife gave me some flats and low heels (<1 in) but I don't wear them. I don't have girl pants or casual clothes. That's my CD style identity. When I dress up I don't want to look like the average woman, I want to look like the pretty me!

I can relate to this to a degree.. I've found that as time goes on, Abi definitely has developed a particular style regime.. bodycons work well so they are the staple, with jumpsuits and playsuits for more casual events.. skater dresses or leggings and blingy tops for daywear. All the "regular" girl stuff such as jeans/trousers/casual tops are now part of my androgynous wardrobe, worn almost exclusively as an alternative to drab.

I can't imagine Abi ever going out in even smart jeans unless the weather/events prescribed it. She has flats, but I wear those more than she does, it's always heels with the dresses.

I've actually found that I share a LOT of style with 3 of my closest friends too.. I have lost count of the number of times one of them has said "Oh I LOVE that dress/top/jeans" etc. I've also encountered a couple of occasions of "omg, I have that exact same dress at home" too. one of my friends mothers once asked me if I was actually born male after I helped my friend match shoes and accessories to a new dress she bought.. my answer was "unfortunately.. yes I was" lol

It seems that for many of us it's taken a longtime to discover why. In the end, "because I enjoy it" seems to fit the bill for a large number of us. Having said that, I'm sure that there are many others that do it for for many different reasons and for several reasons at the same time. My crossdressing started as a sexual kink and I spent years wondering and worrying about dysphoria and sexuality until I relaxed and realised that I'm a fairly average crossdresser that likes to let out and indulge my female side, which I guess puts me a few steps along the transgender scale as well. And that's fine. Each to their own.

I get what you mean about "I'm not a woman, I'm a crossdresser." Take an extreme example how many woman dress like the Drag Queens on Ru Paul's Drag Race? It's different, a lot of girls these days will wear a checked shirt, boxers, jeans and Converse trainers to the shopping mall. Which is pretty much what I wear in male drab, so really the clothes that I wear en-femme are an indulgence of my stereotypical idea of female. Add some make up, hold-ups and breast forms and I'm there.

I don't often dress extravagantly feminine but I can do on occasion, Saturday nights maybe. But most of the time I dress in what I would say is average female attire, in order to present and feel female. I do this for more than one reason. I enjoy the feeling of the clothes, it relaxes me, I can be someone else, I enjoy feeling and looking female. I would love to "pass" but that's a bit of a stretch. I differ in that I'd say, "I'm not a woman, I'm a crossdresser but I want to be a woman for a while." My sexuality might not change, but I'm trying to present a different gender certainly. If that makes sense.

That ideal of trying to feel female for a while is great and that's as far as I've ever needed to take it. So that's slightly more than CD's that do it just for fun but these different areas of the spectrum people are on are fine as long as, whoever we are, we are enjoying it just as you say.

As life has gone by and several purges. My style has become comfy. Shorts, jeans, teny shoes, comfy bra, panties. The i have some sexy going out stuff with medium heels and dresses. And i got some knee high, high stilletto heeled 4 or better high boots. Nothing to go with them. So cant just wear them.
Mostly though just wanna blend in and be one of the gals. No fan fare, no glory, just be.

I think having fun is the good way to say it! But I also crossdress to feel pretty/sexy. I'm 5,6 and weigh 112 lbs, so I don't have a male figure and buying male clothes is a disaster. When I shop/dress female I can easy for me to buy clothes and they fit Immediately perfect. So for me it's also having a body type that is seen as beautiful/sexy and be able to wear clothes and feel sexy and beautiful it it. So for me is it fun and feeling good!

Anne-Sofie

I dress to pass...

Since I don't pass, its a source of frustration.

This is a great thread!
I dress for myself and I do enjoy it and it is fun!
For me most of the fun comes from my preperations and the actual act of transformation.
I enjoy the time it takes for me to do my make-up (up to a couple of hours!). The effort I put into painting my nails (false). Sliding on my underwear, rolling on stockings, fastening a bra. All of these things and all of the rest-shoes, jewellery, dresses, skirts, blouses, wigs etc.- all add to my pleasure and the fun I have when I dress.
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