Danielle,One of the problems with forums like this is that it can " ramp things up" so that people don't see the individuality of their own situation...they just get caught up in the discussion. They become crazy to charge ahead without the thought of how to do it in the best way for themselves. Make the effort to stay under control without the drama and seek the professional guidance that is available to you at HB.
No one here wants you to be dead. Who nearly killed you last month? We want everyone to be happy and alive.Quote:
Originally Posted by MissDanielle
As far as people I know personally and socially, none, really.
I went to one TG support group meeting recently, and two or three of the individuals there I would not have guessed were presenting opposite to their birth gender, if they had not stated they were. But I don't know I would call that 'stealth', as I don't know if they were fully transitioned and presenting full time as their target gender, or if they openly admit they are TG to others, or if they live a double life and sometimes still present as their birth gender to those who don't know them in their new gender role. For two of them, I am pretty certain they were effectively fully transitioned and living their new role full time, as they were FtM TG's who now have beards! I doubt either of them could pass for a 'normal' GG any more, and I wouldn't consider them to be stealth - just relatively 'newly-minted' full-time males.
To me, a TG person who has completed transition, or who has gone far enough in the process to convincingly live and pass as their target gender full timer, isn't 'stealth'. They are simply living a normal life in their desired gender role.
To me, 'stealth' would be what I was for a year or so when I first started out, where I under-dressed with feminine panties under my normal male clothing daily, and owned a small collection of feminine stuff that I tried on only in the privacy of my own home, but no one other than my wife and daughter were aware I was even under dressing. I still had a beard, and nothing I wore outside the house visibly marked me as being an MtF CD or TG person. Even if I had a medical appointment and had to drop my pants, the bikini panties I would wear on those occasions could more or less pass as unisex, unless you looked closely at them. Solid colors, often black, and no lace,
Or it would be me as I was for the first year or so that I started going out dressed in public - where when I did go out, it was only fully dressed and in full makeup, wig and forms, done well enough that I didn't at all resemble my male self and could generally pass as a GG, and I was keeping a firm separation between my feminine self and the places 'she' would go and the friends 'she' had, and the places I went as a male and the friends I had as a male. The only overlap was that 'she' might be seen leaving 'his' home and driving 'his' car. I probably could have walked right past a neighbor or a close friend of my male self, and they would have not connected 'her' with the male identity, unless they saw me driving my car. Even being seen coming and going from my home could have been the appearances of a female friend, as far as anyone could tell.
Since last August or so, I ceased caring who saw me or if I was 'made' as a CD or TG person. When en-femme, I do my best to pass as a GG. But if people ask, or if it is appropriate for them to know, I'll admit I am TG. I've talked en-femme to neighbors, in my home. I'm essentially fully 'out' though there are still family members in a different town that I haven't come out to yet.
Things reached the point in which it was transition or die. I tried pushing things off in order to freeze sperm but living part time in my apartment while presenting as male in public just got to be too much of a mental toll on my health to where I just wanted to end it if it meant not having to be trans. I started HRT last Sunday. 4th session of laser on Weds.Quote:
Originally Posted by LelaK
Facially, as the fat shifts around, I should have no problem as long as laser does a lot of magic before I start on electro, if I can even afford that and right now, it doesn't look all that great financially speaking.
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i am seeing a therapist and have been since November.Quote:
Originally Posted by Rogina B
Strong religious upbringing makes being trans not so easy. thankfully being on HRT has ended the depression. Still, new wardrobe won't be cheap.
How many STEALTH TS, TG and CD's do I know? None of course because they are like me - stealthy. I daresay that with some few exceptions, most of us choose to be pretty much in the closet and out only to a very few people that we trust.
MissDanielle, If you've reached the point where you think killing yourself is better than living as a male, you need to stop worrying about your wardrobe and get some serious mental health help. Not a therapist, a psychologist. Perhaps even check yourself into a mental hospital. Asking for advice from strangers on the Internet is not going to help your situation.Quote:
Originally Posted by MissDanielle
As for your religion, if it is telling you that you cannot be a transsexual but you believe you are, you need to make a choice between the two. You don't need that extra confusion and pressure in your life.
Best wishes, please get help.