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Hi Teresa,
Since my wife detests my dressing and we have a DADT relationship, I would not ever mention this website. She might want to know my identity on here and would then discover the extent of my public dressing. That would not be cool.
If she asked, it would be due to her suspecting something or finding me on the site. I would reluctantly tell her, but attempt to maintain my anonymity in who I am. It would be easier on her to not read my posts. If it ever happens, I will most likely be able to dress every day, as I would probably be divorced.
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My wife knows I am a cross dresser. Whether she knows I peruse this site, let alone have joined, I really do not know. In a DADT atmosphere I have not felt any compulsion to tell her. If she were to ask, I'd tell her I belong to this site. She knows I have bought women's clothing on eBay. I do not have a Facebook or similar account. If seen my wife's FB pages by her invitation, and, well, there is entirely too much time wasted posting trivia. Here? Well, if my wife were to ask what and why, I'd tell her there really is no other place for me to converse with others about a "taboo" subject.
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This site is not necessarily for the faint at heart nor mind. One needs to come here with an open mind and the ability to understand that we really do cover a great spectrum of feelings, needs and wants, not to mention our own fantasies. That what someone else does, would not necessarily mean that we do it too. If the SO is volatile, has little common sense and maturity when it comes to sensitive matters like this side of our lives, then I would not recommend telling them about this site.