I should have known better

Yep, this happens quite often. I am in a modified DADT, so I try to schedule things around my wife's schedule. Sometimes this works, often times not. But even when I DO tell her ahead of time it doesn't always work. Like Halloween this year, and the unexpected visit home from college of my youngest. I ended up changing plans because my wife was excited and wanted family time. (Amongst other things)

I think Pat makes a great observation. I would add of course that because many wives don't care for CDING and view it with disdain, they see it as the bottom priority. Sometimes they will even sabotage the effort if they are mad enough.

Unfortunately you will find that when this happens, you can't go back and say, "well, what about all the times I had to sacrifice". That goes over like a lead balloon.

Tina, I feel for you, but unfortunately, some time we just have to sick it up, and move on. Hopefully there will be another opportunity just around the corner. Otherwise, you may have to make your own opportunity with a weekend away, by your self.

Tina,

Sorry to hear about that. I had a very similar situation earlier this week myself. I took off from work but by the time my vacation days arrived, my elderly parents need help one day, and my wife’s work schedule got changed the next. It’s frustrating but it happens to all I’m afraid.

Suzanne

before I retired I would say that I was to tired from long work days to do that sort of thing.
Now I have no excuse. Always a yes.

Yeah sometimes we don't get a chance and I hope you get a chance soon.

Ellen, Carla, Brenda, Meghan, Suzanne, Sheila, and Dana - thank you all for your kind words of commiseration. It won't get me too down, I had just thought I had avoided the last minute change.

Now as we head into the holidays, I know that there won't be much time possible, as I have an important trip to California over New Year's. Unfortunately, it won't be a trip for Tina, as the days (and nights) will be long. So I'll wait patiently for the opportunity to come either late winter or early spring.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Krisi

So, If there's any way you can tell your wife about your "hobby" and get her to accept it. that's the best way to go.

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The problem with introducing that concept, is that they can then simply suggest that we get a new 'hobby', and won't understand when we say we can't.

I commiserate with you Tina. I have been in the same shoes (size 11 W Mary Jane pumps :)) many times. My wife actually has come out in the past and stated that she doesn't like to leave me alone because she wants to discourage my dressing.

But this weekend I had the opposite experience from yours. My wife had to travel to visit her sick grandmother and I was supposed to drive with her. Then my daughter (home from college for the weekend) decided to join us - and the decision was made that they could go on their own for some mother-daughter time while I stayed home. They weren't out the door for 5 minutes until I was dressed in my most comfortable, chores-around-the-house outfit. I even napped in my lounge chair in the afternoon, cozily dressed knowing that I had no risk of anyone intruding unexpectedly.

Of course, as these things go, the wife's trip to take care of her grandmother for a few days next month (another opportunity for some blissful Anne time) got cancelled:Angry3:. We take the good with the bad. And I surely had a fine Anne day yesterday.

I can relate and sympathize with you. I am still in the closet to my wife and will always be. There have been any number of times when I thought she would be gone foe business or even just out of the house for a few hours and my anticipated opportunities for dressing and shopping just evaporated. Oh well, such is the secret life we lead.
I hope that more opportunities come for you soon.