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Carla, I'm sorry to crash in this thread that's yours again but I see you're crying without tears or at least i can't see them.
Believe me that the tough part of the story we feared with wife was the kids. 3 married men with amazing women but you know who was radical and fundamental to go out to the world? My three kids. One if them came to us one day asking me why I don't come out and be happy, he told us love us unconditionally because we had taught him to be a good man and a good husband and part ok that was honesty. The rest is history
You can see pics of us with wife, kids in my Instagram.....may be you're not trans (I think you are) may be you don't have the urgency to live as a woman (o may be you have but you know you could satisfy it) t hi is life is just one, and as someone told the story of a survey to old people in hospices and rest home, asked about their regrets on life, almost all of them said that the main regrets were to not have done some things in life that was too late now...
Devi
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I have told my fiancee, my children from a previous marriage, future step-daughter, mom, and best friend and all have been supportive. My fiancee and future step-daughter love helping me shop for clothes and are starting to teach me about makeup.
I have not told my father or siblings and probably will not. We have not been close for many years.
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Easy for some not easy for others my dressing was severely suppressed because of the work I did, nothing lasts for ever and 2 divorces followed finally finding my kids after trying for close on 20 yrs succeeded in that but now fearful of telling them for losing them once again!
if only i could find a way of telling my kids I would.
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I have told both of my wives.
During my divorce my first wife threatened to use it against me in order to keep me from having custody of my daughter. In the end she did not but only because I would have been fired from work and then no alimony or child support.
My second wife knows and has been supportive until this year. For some reason she does not want to see it this year. We have been married 15 years.
I have never told anyone else.
I did go out dressed with my mom and wife one Halloween but she has no idea.
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My wife has known since April 2004. She found out a few hours after I did when she got home from work to find me wearing some of her old clothes she had put aside to take to a charity shop. Apparently I had the biggest smile ever on my face ...
Pretty much anyone I care about now knows - sisters, their husbands, nieces and nephews I told maybe ten years ago. In-laws know but they were told more recently - in-law cousins found out at a meal at our house when I left the table part way through the evening and returned wearing my then favourite skirt and top.
The weekend before last I outed myself on Facebook to all my FB friends and also on the Whatsapp group for fans of the semi-professional football (soccer) team we support. Everyone who has commented has been supportive. If anyone is at all anti then I see that as their problem, not mine.
Talking to my wife yesterday we realised her foster sister may not know, but she's coming round to our place this evening and we'll make sure she does know tonight. Wouldn't want her and her husband being shocked at the Christmas get together where I'll probably be wearing a dress :battingeyelashes:
There's a couple of friends who we haven't told as my wife reckons the woman just wouldn't be able to cope with the info.
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There was a time, when everyone in my immediate family knew I was living as a girl...but I am in the closet, sort of...for over25 years now!.
Mom raised me to embrace my feminine traits and I was her last child, a girl she didn't get...but that's a whole novel.
I was taught a hard lesson after college, being engaged twice to girls who couldn't get passed my femininity.
So I went deep into the closet and gave up presenting as a girl, when I met my current and only wife, I was 35 when I purged.
Family members who knew teenager and college girl Candice, knew about my failed engagements so they were all pretty keen about not offering info about my past.
Nothing about me being transgendered was mentioned or suggested.
What my wife got was from the family is I was coddled and pampered as the youngest of all boys, and was a sickly baby.
I gave up all my efforts to transition after I met my current wife and purged for over 15 years since we married.
There are maybe 3 people in the family who, "know all" ...and are still alive.
Keeping the secret of my girly past reaffirms my thoughts that by staying in the closet, that is keeping my marriage of over 25 years working.
She married a husband, not a transgendered girl. I would feel very selfish if I forced my desires to be femme whenever I want on her....or her family and our friends.
Sure I would be naive to think she doesn't know more than she says, I have natural breasts and a lot of feminine traits, after all...
By keeping Candice separate from my husband self, I keep our DADT relationship working.
Today, after all is said and done, I am comfortable with both side and don't mind if I am husband or my Candice self.
But it is sure a lot of fun to reminisce and relive my youthful days!
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Oh gosh, Candy. You were so cute in high school!
My wife knows--but DADT relationship.
Two adult daughters know--but they are sort of neutral on the idea.
Younger brother knows--again rather neutral--he has not mentioned my cding in years.
Good question, Carla. Be nice to your daughter.
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Only my wife knows... and the pets we have had :). As for my wife we have gone through the total spectrum. Total secrecy, to DADT, to not minding seeing Danielle, to every permutation in between, to the current situation where we can talk about most Danielle things and she will ask how a Danielle day went but does not want to see Danielle. But even with open discussion sometimes the unexpected negative reaction occurs. The other day I was telling her I had bought several new wigs and she was quite upset about the money I spend on Danielle stuff. I calmly tried to to explain yearly it was less than she spends on her hobbies but it was one of those times that rational discussion was not going to cut through her emotional reaction.