Shoot, I've had it wrong all these years.
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Shoot, I've had it wrong all these years.
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Well things get complicated here IMO. According to a LOT of people, what you described is the ?real? definition of crossdressing. A lot of people consider crossdressing specifically the act of dressing in the opposite gender clothes for sexual gratification. Everyone else would be a trans person expressing their gender.
Of course there is going to be a chorus of people here who say ?Wait a minute! I dress to express but Im a crossdresser and NOT trans!?
The bottom line is that most of the vocabulary surrounding our community is currently in transition and flux, so don?t worry too much about the ?proper? terminology because the whole world is still trying to figure that out.
I'm amazed at all the responces to my original post..There is obviously more to this lifestyle than I ever imagined..I'm learning a lot reading here and hope to keep learning..Thank you!
Missy
Well, for starters quite a few crossdressers wouldn't describe what they do as a "lifestyle", Missy!:heehee:
Most that dress out and about often or daily would consider themselves to be trans.:battingeyelashes:
I'll bet I'm one of few here that is a confirmed CD who wraps her life around her dressing!:eek:
Why is the label so important? If you wear a skirt but call it a kilt, maybe you're not crossdressing. If you wear a pink shirt from the men's section but you think it's feminine, maybe you are crossdressing. Seriously, if you're here you know what you're doing, and it's probably crossdressing. And that's ok.
TexasLegs,Quote:
Originally Posted by TexasLegs
I don't need research. I can just point to myself. I've been crossdresing to some extent for over fifty years and it has never, I repeat NEVER been sexual. If I wanted sexual release, I had old Sears catalogs(some of those old corsets models' were damned hot) or my older brother's Playboy magazines for that. Dressing has always been relaxing, a feeling of normalcy for me.
There are as many reasons men dress as there are men who dress. Even fetish dressers have slight variations on their particular fetish; for some it's stockings, others panties. Some like to dress in latex suits and give the girls in this forum a hard time(Hi DocRob...) :worship:
About the only brush broad enough to paint us all is the one Karen mentioned, we are all people that like to wear clothing generally ascribed to a different gender.
Love all of you, now it's time for ice cream. :)
There is a factor not mentioned in previous posts.You must be MALE!
Women have been appropriating male clothes for decades, but no one refers to them as crossdressers. They're "tomboys" or "borrowing guy's shirts" etc..
I think ShelbyDawn nailed it.
Recently, my wife says, “They’re just clothes.” So, I’m not sure what I’m doing now?!
Mine is a first edition written so long ago, way before womens jeans were invented! Crossdressing at it purest!Quote:
Originally Posted by Teri Ray
That's not how it works. You've made the assertion. Back it up or don't, but you don't get to transfer that burden to others.Quote:
Originally Posted by TexasLegs
I will agree that there are a lot of fetish dressers who won't, or can't, admit to it, but you're going to have to show the proof supporting your assertion.
And the ice cream was quite tasty as well, Blue Bell Cookies and Cream. :)Quote:
Originally Posted by Crissy 107
I
don't think it matters much anymore defining yourself as it seems that the definitions are changing.
There are also CDs that do it to express themselves as women (in public). Is gender dysphoria only for transexuals? No, there isn't always a dividing line between CDs and transexuals. Each of us have to analyze ours selves to decide where we are on the TG spectrum. And that may change is time goes on!Quote:
Unless you're referring to drag performers, who get no sexual satisfaction from dressing, this is not correct. All crossdressers, gay or straight, dress for sexual satisfaction.
Trans do dress for entirely different reasons, I agree. They have gender dysphoria.
I've pointed out many times that we are all unique and now you've seen (in answers to this thread) that some don't dress for sexual arousal. In fact, it seems most don't!
Maybe assigning simple labels to people or behaviors is like naming colors. There are some shades most would call green but a lot of shades we might not agree to simply call green. Neither colors nor people can always be described so simply. That is one reason why life is fun.
Cheers,
Vale
No, we don't.Quote:
Originally Posted by TexasLegs
^this is the assumption, made by those who DO do it for sexual pleasure. In order to feel that they are normal, they project their own behavior and feeling onto everyone else, in order to feel that their feelings are the same as the rest of us.Quote:
Originally Posted by MiniRock
Not true, either. While plenty of women will wear men's clothes, it's not to change what they want their sexuality to display. But a few women WILL wear men's clothing, in order to display that they are masculine. Though not in great numbers, they are out there, most often seen in masculine gay women.Quote:
Originally Posted by donnalee
The problem is, most crossdressers can't tell you why they do it. There's this huge social stigma against menQuote:
Originally Posted by Aunt Kelly
behaving, feeling or displaying femininity, that few are willing to explore the reasons why they do it. To them, it's just simpler to tell others that they were 'born that way'.
The definitions aren't changing. But perhaps slowly, over time, more males will be willing to examine why they want to embrace femininity. But it's not going to happen any time soon. We still have a whole lot of men who can't accept that they have feminine feelings, so much so, that they can't even accept it as part off themselves. Look at all of those who have to go to the extreme off creating a fake feminine persona, to assign all those feminine feelings to, to the point where they need to refer to themselves in third person to avoid any connection between themselves and those female feelings.Quote:
Originally Posted by XemmaX
My wife called it crossdressing so I?ll take it. Especially since she?s ok w it.
I'm going to agree with Karren's definition.
Complete sense.
I personally think it's more than crossdressing.
Crossdressing and the variants of the word is something that no crossdressing people invented to express or explain it but for me, what does it male a man to want and enjoy dressing as a woman? It's not a life style, it's not a hobby. There's something deepnthere in you brain but deep rooted norms of historic society rules had written and we try to explain the inexplicable.
Fore is just trans people in its wide variety of possibilities.
The sexual component is just the testosterone in your body confusing you gender with sexual preference. Without testosterone, so after taking testosterone blockers as part of the so called HRT the brain feels free of that poison called testosterone and can see and feel things different and the sexual ingredient lose its power and let pass the real identity.
Mho.
Devi
Not argument. I'm fine with that reality. It's the assertion that it's all fetish driven that I am challenging.Quote:
Originally Posted by sometimes_miss
I agree.
Why can't you be a crossdresser AND something else? I'm reminded of that old 50's Eddie Cochran tune "Something Else." The first verse goes:
A look a-there, here she comes
There comes that girl again
Wanted to date her since I don't know when
But she don't notice me when I pass
She goes with all the guys from outa my class
But that can't stop me from a-thinkin' to myself
She's sure fine-lookin' man, she's something else
As a wearer of beautiful/romantic sleepwear & lingerie there is definitely a sexual component to it but I don't consider it to be a "fetish", fetish makes it sound dirty imo. I love getting ready for bed every night in my lingerie and I feel it's a part of who I am, not simply a kinky fetish.
I looked it up in the Wiki - Drag performers are crossdressing but they are not cross dressers. A cross dresser wears clothing of the opposite sex BECAUSE it is of the opposite sex (not because it is their job).Quote:
Originally Posted by TheHiddenMe
Except some drag performers might really, really enjoy their job.
A crossdresser is someone who chooses to wear the clothing associated with a person of the opposite gender because that clothing is associated with the opposite gender
Greetings, everyone. I like the definition above most of all. Yes, to me, a teenage girl wearing her dad's flannel shirt is not crossdressing (verb) or a crossdresser (noun), but a man who wears a bra and stockings because he is attracted to women's underwear is crossdressing. If this is a repetitious act, then he is a crossdresser.
I very seldom wear women's underwear or outerwear, but it does happen and I do have a small collection for when the temptation arises, so I am an occasional crossdresser. I have a beard and I do not try to imitate a woman's look or behavior, so I am not really "presenting as the opposite gender." I do not believe "presentation" needs to be a part of the definition of crossdressing.
Let us consider the subcategory of underdresser. This would be a man presenting as male to the world but perhaps wearing women's lingerie underneath the male drab. While I am drawn to wearing women's clothing, especially underwear, I have no interest in wearing a dress in public, so I may wear only women's underwear under my male clothing. Dresses I wear only while home alone, presenting to no one but the guy in the mirror.
Sexual orientation is also not a factor. I used to identify as bisexual, but I have not been with a woman in a few decades so I now identify more as gay. I am a very masculine man and am perfectly comfortable feeling and acting masculine while crossdressing.
Lastly, I keep seeing the word "fetish" in this thread and I am not comfortable with it. To me, I perhaps prefer the word "kink," which to me implies that the crossdressing is enjoyable but not required for sexual satisfaction.
CeCe