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I think we have a grown filter through which we look at ourselves and other cd's. That filter unconsciously pulls out a lot of the things that others see that make us. In other words, we see what WE want and not necessarily what the world sees. Does that mean that none of us ever pass? Absolutely not. But I suspect very few of us do. The saving grace for us is that the world is not out there "looking for cd's." Most people are wrapped up in their own worlds to even notice. So, if we try to blend, we'll have much more success (and peace of mind) being out and about. Blending means a lot of things which this thread isn't about, but I suspect that should be the goal for most of us.
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Firstly remember that anything that is not ordinary stands out to people.
Too tall, too short, too skinny, too fat. Over dressed for where you are, under dressed (think WalMartians). Heels that are sky high, hair that is a flamboyant color.
I remember years ago I was at a bowling alley with friends in the summer. Along comes the local college women's volleyball team all in short shorts and tank tops and all over 6' tall. Yes, they got everyone's attention.
Too much makeup, too little makeup. Anything "different" attracts attention so just be prepared to be scrutinized if you are not the youthful, appropriately dressed, average height and weight lady who's walking by.
Just hold your head up, be confident in who you are and carry yourself in a manner that shows you belong there.
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Blame it on Darwin.
Given our home sapient past, our minds instinctively look for something out of the ordinary, to protect us from the lions or other wild things that were going to devour us in our prehistoric past. Our minds spot something and recognize something doesn’t quite fit.
We go anywhere and our minds immediately judge woman versus man. As much as we can try, our proportions set off bells and whistles.
I always assume people know I'm a guy in a dress. However, they don’t know it's ME in the dress--and I want to make sure it’s a pretty dress.
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I have to totally agree with Monica (#24). There is also the added fact that women are built differently than men to assist in bearing children. You can put on all the padding you want, if you walk, you're clocked. I've walked behind many nicely apportioned rear ends with a nice little wiggle and it's never been anyone but a woman. If a MtF cross dresser has to think about doing the mannerisms then it becomes so obvious. As a little chuckle, over my seven decades I have seen many women totally absentmindedly raising their dresses/skirts to adjust their hosiery. The other movement is adjusting a bra strap without any thought given to who may be watching. It's just a learned female trait that ends up having no conscious thought.
Of course, if you try to emulate the mannerisms of a woman, then even in male attire you get glances. Once my daughter asked if I shaved my legs. Nope, my dna gave me no hair follicles on my legs and underarms. Hadn't she ever noticed before? My wife said it "was wasted on a guy." All my wife does is complain about shaving her legs and underarms. Grrrr!, she says. And, my daughter once asked why I sit with one leg crossed over the other at the knee which tilts the body. Guys are suppose to splay ttheir legs in front of them and trip everyone as they go by. Simple answer. A physical therapist suggested that way of sitting to open up the spine on the side I lost all that shock absorbing material at a particular disk.
I does come down to a person observing due to some habit or just so self absorbed he or she does not notice squat. How many times have you had to brake to a stop in a parking lot because someone has their nose into a cell phone. Happens every week. On the other hand, some like me, because of military experience subconsciously scan the surroundings for anything out of the norm. If something is out of place, it registers in the brain.
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I would be read by a blind man who had one to many drinks. . . .
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I've had a few looks and stares, but most of the time they seem to be trying to work out if I'm a guy, rather than showing that they know.
Having said that, I'd estimate that over 95% of the time I pass people by unnoticed. I never go out over-dressed, usually wear flats to compensate for my height.
It's been said many times before on here that if you dress to blend in, you're less likely to be noticed.
I have quite broad shoulders, which I am very conscious of, but there are a few outfits I own which tend to have a narrowing effect, or at least hide the problem.
When I wear those, I tend to be spotted less.
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I would like to say no, but experience has taught me to celebrate those occasions when I seem to have passed and accept and celebrate those times (much more often) when I am read but welcomed or at least tolerated.