Confidence

Heather, just jump in, the water is fine! I spend way too long, almost 50 years, waiting for "just the right time" but when I finally got going "out the door", there has been little stopping me and I can honestly say NO BAD REACTIONS.

If you're worried, that will show to some extent, which will only set off people's radar, but if you believe you are just a woman out for a day of shopping or whatever, you will draw little to no reaction if you are dressed close to the "norm".

Way back in the day I went out to the local mall in a hot pink wrap dress, white stockings and 4" pumps, the best thing I can remember is that it was almost empty. My last outing was about 4 hours, 2 of which was shopping with a CD/TG friend, an hour at Panera and finally an hour in a convenience store, super market and a few clothing stores. Other than one "second glance" at a high end store, no one really even appeared to notice me and at almost 6'/260, someone should have. I was dressed in a casual manner, black/white/green pant set/cardigan, very "blendy" so very successful. Just put on a low key outfit and go give it a try, you'll only regret not having done it long ago!

I want to stress this from Di:

Quote:

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I asked her to visualize her walking with her head held high and walking with confidence.
I have seen many CDs walking ( out and about- plus here in videos- their head darting nervously-..that makes people look/ stare to see what in the world is wrong.just force yourself not do that.

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Last week, we saw a CDer taking a stroll in a historic area, dressed in a pretty summer dress. However, she had her head pointed to the ground and an obvious man walk, ---- wide stance, long steps. We saw her again later in the day, carrying a pizza box, same forward head posture. Holding your head high gives the look of confidence.

For those who lack confidence, Halloween is a great excuse to go out fully dressed because, worst comes to worst, you can always fall back on 'Oh, sorry for making a mess, but it's Halloween, hahahahh... :-}

As for going out...Parks during the day are nice...
You can distance yourself from other people...lots
of places to sit and check your phone, take a selfie, etc.

Malls are good place to.

Just go though a Wendy's or McDonalds drive thru.

Your confidence will grow.

I went into Academy Sports yesterday morning shopped and
made a purchase. The female at the register said "I get you over
here ma'am...Have a great day ma'am"

I go to Sheetz Gas station most mornings and get a sweet tea.
kind funny but the construction guys hold the door for me " After you
ma'am. It takes a little getting use to because I'm usually holding the
door for a lady.

I've had never a bad experience while out..maybe a second look
once in a while but nothing said.

I have unlimited confidence to wear what I like!

As long as it's in my home or backyard, and the neighbors aren't in the areas where they can see over my fence, and the kids or friends aren't coming over.

But other than that, Yeah you can't stop me!! I can do this!

Someday for me was about seven years ago today.

My wife was out of town for four days and I decided to go for it. Day 1: nails. Day 2. Sephora makeover and trying on dresses at Nordstrom. Day 3. Buy a wig while dressed. Day 4. Figure it out.

I had a great reaction on day 1 from my nail tech and Day 2 was even better. The Sephora makeover taught me enough and gave me the products to do my own makeup, and the sales angels at Nordstrom set up a room of dresses for me to try on, and the support that they were on my side.

Seven years later, I've probably been out a thousand times and tomorrow will fly pretty to Las Vegas for Diva Las Vegas for five days of getting to dress. I read about others going out and asked myself "why not me?". One day I hope you'll ask yourself the same question and get the same answer I did.

My first experience out was nothing like my second experience out which was nothing like my third experience out. Each time you learn so much and gain more confidence. Even if you hate it the first time promise yourself to try it a few times before passing judgement. Your early development moves so quickly. Even if you have a bad experience it's likely an isolated situation and will get better.

hello Heather,
You are so right - this forum is so supportive and kind.
Moreover - I feel that we do not judge other members - you can be as daring as you wish to be, yet no one will criticize you for not keeping your dressing private; it is more about finding your happy place in life.
luv J

To me the FEAR OF ANTICIPATION is almost always greater than the reality. Whether starting a new job first day of work, taking an exam, participation first day on a new sports team, etc the anxiety we place on ourselves in ANTICIPATION usually is greater than the REAL EVENT warrants. This certainly has been true for me in the world of Cross Dressing. In the end the pure joy I get from my adventures as a NEW woman is worth the effort and anxiety I experience before each new adventure. Nikki.

Confidence is not just the one flavour. Last Saturday night I was visiting a gg friend who is 90 years old dressed for the first time. I have mostly come out to her about my dressing. I phoned before I went to ask if it was ok to come completely dressed. I was trembling when I was on the phone. She answered Yes if you want to. I drove to her house, 15 minutes, and entered to see her and the whole time I had no nerves at all. That continued the whole time and she was amazing throughout. What a friend. I don't know where confidence comes from.