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What I do know, after several years of bedroom play that was mutual with lingerie, my wife and I discovered there was more to my desire to wear women's clothing than just bedroom play. It turned her off. What I clearly remember in our 'discussion' is she wished she had never told me of her past because then she would have been able to walk away from the marriage playing the poor victim. So, I was willing to accept her. She was not willing to accept me. Talk about bullshit.
My wife actually compared all the things about her that I had to accept to be with her to my crossdressing and decided I was still the one with the greater load to accept. She also pointed out quite a few times that I had a right to wear whatever I want, and she had no right to tell me not to. So she'd set for herself the goal from the outset that she was going to accept it because she had no right not to.