Have you treated your crossdressing as an addction?

I went to several different therapists over 3 or 4 years. The best thing I learned was to accept myself. Once I did that, it took the pressure off.

The feeling that I was broken, perverted or any of the other names we might be called or we might accept being called is gone.

No, its a pleasure, the icing on the cake of life.

Chloe,

It's an interesting thread, and I have tried to think about how to respond with some difficulty. You see, it is WAY more than a hobby for me so that would not apply. The question is, at what point does a compulsion become more like an addiction. I do not propose to have the answers, but I can say that it is controlling me more so than the other way around. I may be borderline "addicted".

I go through some curious phases where I do riskier and riskier activities, until I get caught in some fashion. Then I go into sort of a depressive state where I am able to suppress my desires to dress for a while. Eventually the cycle begins again. Lately I have entered the risky phase again, and I can not seem to stop. This morning while my wife was still asleep I got fully dressed with makeup , wig and all, and went to a Target to purchase some makeup remover. I got it all off before she woke up, but talk about risky. I was wearing very tight short black shorts and a very thin white form fitting top with my forms on. One car in the parking lot tooted the horn a few time I suspect to get me to turn, haha.

Anyhow. for me it is somewhat of an addiction, but no pill is going to cure my head. So what to do. I go right up to the edge of getting caught but do not really want to get caught. I think there is something going on with the adrenaline rush which seems to be part of the addiction for lack of a better term. The struggle goes on.

Best wishes

Sandi

"...something going on with the adrenaline rush..."

Absolutely, but that rush, and the need to pursue it, is something quite apart from what drives the gender non-conforming behavior. I believe that it is a mistake (albeit and easy one to make) to conflate the two. The evidence is plain in the many, many stories here, stories which fall into two broad categories; those that tell about cross-dressing and seeking thrills by risking discovery, and those that tell about how that thrill is not there now, or never was, while the need to dress remained.

Sandi, it is that risk taking behavior that concerns me. Putting your relationship or your safety at risk for the sake of a form of gratification...either one...is where compulsion migrates to addiction. Of course you do not want to get caught, but if your behavior puts you into a situation where that is increasingly likely, then want has nothing to do with it.

I know you are not in a relationship that is supportive of your behavior. I guarantee that however you are caught, regardless of the circumstances, the results will be worse than if you found a way to discuss it before something forces the issue again.

Two of my favorite shoes are hoarders and 600 lb life. In each show they deal with people who have compulsions and or addictions that seek help. Some successful overcome their compulsions and or addictions and some do not. Granted hoarding and or over eating is harmful to oneself and often others while cding is generally not (well it can be harmful to.famiky and work), but the stories and responses do sound similar.

Im not taking about where you fit in the feminist scale or gender issues, but The physical act of putting on a dress, heels, pantyhose etc is really not that different than eating. It just generally isn't harmful. You don't need to wear a dress next to be a woman.

crossdressing is not just an addiction but healing process to our spirit ....its our hope and dreams of being a real woman .....love it

I have never thought of it as an addiction. It is an outward expression of my inner femininity. It is simply who I am. I'm addicted to old cars but my dressing is simply an important part of the whole that has always been me.

It is certainly not an addiction. It is just who we are. There may be bits that we can tweak. But on the whole best to just get on with life and make the most of everything that comes with it.

Addiction = something that interferes or disrupts what would be parts of your life that you find valuable.

So at the beginning I felt the compulsion to dress, along with a lack of self acceptance, which led to dishonesty with my partner and myself. That was what could be coined an addiction.

Flipping it on its head, accepting it as a valuable part of who I am (through some therapy and self-forgiveness) means that I can see it as part of me that makes me amazing.

So - at one point, yes. Now - no!

So Bea why do you cross dress if you don't want to appear as a woman. Is it fetish or fascination. Or just a pleasure that you indulge in occasionally Kind of like having a cigar. I am just curious. For me I find pleasure in it. I enjoy sitting down and doing the transformation and then going out to see how I did. Perhaps for me it is a fetish, I am not sure I know what a fetish is. I have no desire to transition and being dressed all the time would take all the fun out of at least for me. I have accepted that part of me but would still like to know the why answer.

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Sherry Thats a very good. A compulsion at the beginning and then it became more of a desire. To use a bad comparison. When I was younger I enjoyed rock climbing immensely even left a few jobs because they interfered with my climbing. Then I realized I needed to make a living and there were other things in life and better ways to achieve the adrenaline rush, now I think CDing helps with that needed adrenaline rush and not near as dangerous. I try to go for a more well rounded life with some of this and some of that.