My sentiments exactly, I love womenkind far too much.Quote:
Originally Posted by yangstyle
Christine :)
Printable View
My sentiments exactly, I love womenkind far too much.Quote:
Originally Posted by yangstyle
Christine :)
Yeah, what she said!..lolQuote:
Originally Posted by yangstyle
I'm 100% hetero but at the same time I wish I was born a girl (then of course I'd simply be a lesbian) if that makes any sense...
For me I never had any doubt about my sexual orientation so I have the ability to provide an honest answer to myself or a poll.Quote:
Originally Posted by kellycan27
Being a CD did give me doubts about my gender identity and I did a long journey that involved many laps in the closet and lots of hiding.
I also spent a long time in denial wondering when I would outgrow this ect ect
Its not a matter of being dishonest its just a matter of not knowing and being unable to provide an honest answer to myself let alone a pollster.
If they had a confused category that would have fit for many years and sometimes today.
Its like watching any game show some questions you just know the answer and can provide a quick honest answer ; others are allot harder :-)
I think what the polls prove is that there are gay and straight CD's and you have to treat CD's like individuals.
I find it funny that people here say that if they were born female they would be lesbian...wanna bet on that? If you were born female with female anatomy and hormones, you would probably be just as straight as you are now. Strange that you think you would be attracted to women if you were a woman.
If you had the same brain you have now and hormones with female anatomy...then you would probably be a FtM TS
Completely hetero CDer here.
I can't really understand why women are attracted to men, though I am not complaining as I have been happily married for 22 years!
Estrogen must be a heck of a drug!
OK I am 2,3,1,2,and if I had to pick again I would go for a Female TomBoy which discribes my wife when we were married anyway. JohannaSophiaQuote:
Originally Posted by DebbieL
I think of myself as hetero, but often find myself attracted to androgynous women. ( Jamie Lee Curtis anyone? ) Actually I think it might be that I'm attracted to a masculine attitude? Jerri Ryan as Seven of Nine could always interest me, but when she was in some of her other roles there was less attraction ( Though that could have something to do with those uniforms! ) I don't want to be with a man, but would probably not have a problem dating a MtF that had fully transitioned.
Does that make me 100%? Dunno.
I started crossdressing around age 13, and for me, the entire reason I got into dressing up to begin with was my intense desire for women. When I was younger, I was an awkward kid. Never had a girlfriend until I was 19. So for many years I didn't know what it was like to be close to a girl, or anything like that. All I had were fantasies, fantasies of being with a girl, being seduced...and in my fantasies the women seducing me were always wearing lingerie, probably because of me discovering Playboy for myself when I was 13. Somehow I found myself being just as turned on my the lingerie as I was the women. So wearing lingerie became the closest I could get to a girl.
For some, crossdressing is pretty much just a sexual turn-on, not a gender identity issue. For those that dress up for purely sexual reasons, it's usually because they love women so much. Weird way of showing it, I know, but there it is.
Could not say it better!Quote:
Originally Posted by yangstyle
Having sex with a man is... well... (shuddering violently) not my cup of tea. There are many here that are into that and that's fine. We're all different and what they do doesn't bug me at all. Not that what I think should matter anyway. Now, for me? I see nothing remotely attractive about a man or his (ahem) member, let alone doing something with him or it. This is regardless of what I may be wearing. Pretending to be a girl is one thing, getting it on like one with another man is something else altogether. Now, if the wife wanted to say... be the dominate one... I might be OK with that, it probably would be kinda fun!
Ginger
Just how old must one be to have this insight?Quote:
Originally Posted by sandra-leigh
How long have you been with him?
If you spent many years with him, had sex with him, shared your life with him, would it change your relationship dramatically if you find out he has a (potential) homosexual tendency?
Does it make any sense to you?
I can only speak for myself. I've never been in an homosexual relationship, I've never tried, I've never looked after it, I haven't done efforts to stay away from it. I'm sure most people would say that I'm pretty straight, even when I'm wearing lace panties. However, I'm not so sure about it and probably I'll never find out.
Quote:
Originally Posted by danielletorresani
Wow - that's the exact same reason I started being a woman, except I was 12 at the time and I stumbled across my dad's secret stash of Penthouses rather than Playboy. I was so intensely aroused that I wanted to be the woman in the pictures just to feel what they're feeling sexually. That was that, and since then I've this intense desire to be woman so I can feel and experience everything female - for me CD has always been a very sexual experience for me. And I don't think I can get arouse any more unless I'm in full out female form. But at the same time I have no desire to be with a man, but I want to be a woman and feel everything woman if that makes any sense. I even have girl `toys`if you know what I mean :o
CindyO,
welcome to the forum, I believe that you will find most CD'ers are Hetrosexual, as its just the wearing of womens clothing that they enjoy, most I know are married,.. on here or those who are widowed, a great many are divorced, but CD'ing is not usually the cause for Divorces,...as you interact here you will find the different level of CD'ers/trans gendered people.
I knew before I got into the relationship I had with CF, so knowing up front it didnt bother me one way or other, he told me he was definitely a hetrosexual male but loves
wearing womens clothing. Its how he is happy with his feminine side,.. as with the others some havent got to that stage others have.
I believe if you have communication always with your husband and tawk tawk all the time,... so as you can both deal with where he is and for you to understand, him
and how you cope with it all....some do question themselves as to if they are straight or otherwise, as CF told me about his experience, and he knew up front
that he was a hetrosexual male.
The only thing ill say here he can wear heels better n me.... drat lol....its a wonder he doesnt break his neck but practice makes perfect hey....lol :battingeyelashes:
Have you joined the FAB section, you will find a huge amount of support from the other GG's as well.
There are lot of CD'ers here that also do give good advice, so you can read through, to see what pertains to your situation.
Enjoy the forum...
Irene shesadvl yup thats me :battingeyelashes:
:clap: :clap: love your quick wit....;) made me laugh ....:battingeyelashes:Quote:
Originally Posted by Lorileah
Easy to answer this one: 100% hetero. 100% attracted to women as long as I can remember. 100% married for 30 years.
-- Jenny
Sums me up. If I wasa girl, I'd have a lesbian relationship.Quote:
Originally Posted by Maija
Actually i am completely hetero. Also in femme mode i only like women but - my last dreams consisted of situations where i was a woman and a man was making rough love to me. So what does that mean? am i gay? in male mode i cannot imagine to be gay, to have sex with a man but in femme and my dreams it happen to occur more often now that a man is making love to me. What does that mean?
I think it means you are using fantasy in order to maximize feeling femme? In other words, the male is fine in your fantasy because he isn't real, but in real life after all the clothes come off, you'd feel differently?Quote:
Originally Posted by pinto
Yes Reine, then i feel different. But is this normal?
I don't think it's unusual, based on the many threads/posts here from other CDs who do fantasize about being with men when in their fantasies, they are in femme mode.Quote:
Originally Posted by pinto
I am not Gay, never have been never will be, I am only interested in GGs.
This is a very interesting question and both CDs/TGs and their partners go across the spectrum. Often, it's assumed that CDs are gay because the most public cross-dressers are "Drag Queens", who are often gay men who dress up to entertain gay men.
Even my own sexual preferences and identity are hard to define. In my fantasies I am always dressed as a beautiful woman, in heels, hose, skirt, satin blouse, jacket, lipstick, make-up, and beautiful hair, and my partner is similarly dressed, usually a bit taller, and perhaps a bit heavier. She is also more aggressive, seducing me more than I am seducing her, but both of us taking our time, kissing, caressing each other, enjoying the sensations of each other's bodies, as well as the clothes. Even the sexual fantasies are Lesbian fantasies. But for years, the final moments, with the clothes off, I would still have real breasts, but we would be having coitus. It was only when I got older and discovered certain toys, that I realized that I liked the alternatives even better than the "real thing".
As for my partners, there is no question. All of those who have enjoyed being with me and stayed in long-term relationships, were bisexual and had had pleasant experiences with both genders at some time in their lives. They were attracted to me because I took my time and was in no rush, and willing to take lots of time to make sure that she was completely satisfied. On many occasions, I could be completely satisfied by pleasing her so much that she was unable to even move afterward, let alone reciprocate. I loved the "quavering jello" experience where all she wanted was to be held and hugged afterward.
I've never been into men. I experimented a few times, but didn't enjoy the experiences. The men who were attracted to me were also bisexual, and very much attracted to the fact that I could look and act like a woman and still have the sense of responsibility of a man.
Transsexuals, especially those who have gone through SRS are often much clearer about their sexual preferences. They are either lesbians or women attracted to men. They have wiped out all aspects of being male, except, perhaps, for a stronger libido than than most women. Often, their partners, even if they know the girls were once men, relate to their partners as women, and if anything just loves that she seems to know how to make their partner happy. This is because she has been able to experience love and sex as both a man and a woman.
Very often, early stages of dressing are closely associated with sexual arousal, but often, the driving force behind the desire to dress quickly goes far beyond just sexual desire. They enjoy experiencing the vulnerability, sensitivity, and other aspects of being feminine. Often, this shift starts to happen when they sexually satisfy themselves, but keep the outfit on afterward.
Often, the feminine desires can extend to many other activities. TGs will often enjoy "chick flicks", enjoy cooking, cleaning, crafts, even sewing, doing laundry, and have a better sense of hygene. They will also be more aware of their physical appearance and will want to control their weight, figure, and appearance. They are more likely to exercise, eat healthier diets, and take care of their bodies. In relationships, TGs are more likely to listen to women as they express their feelings, more interested in "girl talk", and often have many female friends who are not sexual prospects. Often, when a TG or CD sees a girl in a beautiful dress or outfit, they are looking out the outfit, and wondering what it would be like to wear that outfit, even BE that woman, or at least have a figure like hers.
Many TGs will also be less interested in spectator sports such as Hockey, Football, Baseball, or Soccer. They might even be more interested in sports like Figure skating, Gymnastics, or competition dancing, cheer leading, or other dance activities. They are more likely to participate in non-competitive physical activities such as dancing, yoga, Aerobic dancing, Jazzercize, or Zumba.
Given even a little encouragement, CDs and TGs can become extraordinary lovers because they are willing to take direction, because their masculinity isn't threatened, because they aren't as attached to it. In many cases, they will try to act masculine to hide their feminine traits and desires.
You got that right. The actual experience of being a lesbian is not the same as being a hetero guy visualizing how cool it might be to be a lesbian. :heehee:Quote:
Originally Posted by Lorileah
Ever go to a lesbian bar? Ever notice how, on average, the girls have a different sort of look from the girls in straight bars? This raises the issue of a difficult truth: Sexual orientation and gender identity are not the same thing, but they are related. If one shifts, the other can too. I've known plenty of folks who, after transitioning, switched to 100% men. How about them pink apples?
As for me, I'm "half gay, half girl" (bisexual crossdresser). I can't date manly men, but I do like tall, smooth, and pretty guys. Also I can't date girly girls. They have to be sort of tomboyish. My "either/or" sexuality is a mirror of my "either/or" gender, and I think that's the truest equilibrium I may ever find on the spectrum. Inside and out.
I think your wrong there. Sports use to be a male oriented years ago, but not today. When you go to a sporting event today, i see allot of women there, even grandma's at hockey games. Women enjoy sports today more that ever, so why would a TG not like sports. I even realize there are some males who do not like sports at all, but I am a transsexual and i still enjoy sports.Quote:
Originally Posted by DebbieL
I agree with you.Quote:
Originally Posted by ElusiveGirl
I think what is meant by the statement that gender ID and sexual orientation are separate, is that it is entirely possible to have same sex attraction. But this doesn't mean the sexual orientation can't change when there are hormonal changes as the result of transition.
For me 100% hetero! I give GG's credit for finding males attractive!
I'm 100% heterosexual. I've never given any consideration to engaging in same sex activity, although in my youth gays tried to pick me up. Girls too! But my wife would scratch their eyes out without regard to their sexuality. But, seriously, there is nothing feminine about me- looks, mannerisms. hobbies, etc. When Steve is there, it's all male. When Stephanie is there, she is all female. Now, that does not mean Steve will not engage in traditional female activities. Don't through rocks at me. I actually got on hands and knees today in grab to clean the F-ing toilet. I would never do that in one of my pretty dresses.
The vast majority of cross dressers are heterosexual. I think they may be more committed in their relationships with their wives because they are cross dressers and have similar inner feelings. Just take a look at the stats for wandering men AND women. And, the vast majority of gay guys are NOT cross dressers.
And, there are many different types of cross dressers. In my opinion a person who has a fetish for wearing one particular type of feminine garment is not a cross dresser. To be a cross dresser you need to identify with the inner beauty of the female of our species- not her outward attire!
Someone suggested to me that maybe, probably I was gay, and that there was nothing wrong with it. I didn't think it was true, but as a scientist, I decided to run a test. Went to the gym. Looked at the guys in the locker room. Not the smidgen of a tingle. Not at all. Went to my Body Pump class, which is predominently women. Cute girl in front, cute girl to the right. Cute girl to the left. Tingle to the front, to the right and to the left. Happily married for 33 years, so it was just lust in the heart, but answered my question. Hetero.
ooooooooooooo! I LOVE opinion polls! 60% of all CDers are gay the rest just haven't figured it out yet!
I'm 100% into everyone. Except for the people I'm not into.
I recently began going to a Transgender support group locally, and similar topics of discussion have been raised there. Honestly a clear answer is hard to come by, especially with statistics. If you look at Craigslist, for example, you'll see the number of Transwomen seeking men to far outnumber those seeking women. But, one has to wonder how many of those are prostitutes looking for work, so that tilts the numbers, especially when they might not be attracted to men, but just looking for money.
It appears there's plenty of CDs that are closeted, keeping it a deep secret from everyone around them. So, with that in mind, what's the chances of ever getting a true picture of how many are out there?
When I've asked in the meetings about sexual orientation, it seems most Transwomen don't change. But, there are some that do have feelings that develop in them towards others like themselves. So, if that is the case, how do you define that? Let's say one pre-op M2F Transgender is attracted to another pre-op M2F Transgender. What does that make them? Gay, lesbian, straight, hetero, bi, or ... ? I think we can all agree that scenario makes things a bit blurry.
Could it be that we are looking for acceptance, don't find it the way we like, and feel compelled to accept someone else the way we wish we could be accepted? Could that be why a self described hetero male (now Transwoman) could come to have a relationship with another like herself?
So in answer to your original question, like others on this thread, I am and always have been attracted to female, and want to look as much like them as possible. I feel it's the greatest compliment I can pay.
Ann
First of all let me state that I am certainly in the Hetero category and have always been.Quote:
Originally Posted by CINDYO
I don't claim to speak for all of us, but I'm sure that the vast majority are hetero. Whether the majority are or not really has no bearing on your SO. We are individuals and what you should be focusing on is your SO and his status. By determining what percentage of us are or are not does not change him in the least.
This of course is a topic that we all discuss when we come out to our spouses. It was a topic for my wife and I and I certainly understand why it needed to be discussed.
It may seem a "strange thing" for a hetero guy to do, but it's not something that we CHOSE. It's something that is a part of us. It's not like picking what shirt to wear or what color car to buy. It's something inherent.
Focus on him, focus on your relationship, focus on how this relates to you both and not where he lies in the ranking of cd's in general.
As others have said, its doesn't matter what percent are "truly heterosexual". Some are gay, some are straight. The fact the 2 of you have been together for so long and you never once questioned his sexuality before should prove to you he is straight.
To be honest, i think 90% of crossdressers are hetero while the other 10% are bisexual. Why would a gay guy crossdress when he is into men, think about it..........
That's exactly what my gay cousin said when I came out to him a few years ago, when I was asking him the difference between a crossdresser and a drag queen.Quote:
Originally Posted by chloe23
The problem is with the cultural expectation of what "gay guy" means. Also, an astonishing number of "hetero" CD's seem to want to get into my pants. I wonder what that could imply? It may not be "by the book" GAY, but it ain't straight either. More like bi or heteroflexible.Quote:
Originally Posted by Stephanie47
I think the same reasons why an hetero guy crossdress, think about it......Quote:
Originally Posted by chloe23
Speaking for myself only I'm only interested in women. In fact, so interested in them that I like to wear their clothes and makeup. Further, I can't figure out what they find attractive in men. That double-X chromosome is some powerful drug.
I am a crossdresser, and have not been lucky enough or smart enough to make a marrige last. So I am 79 % hetro and 21 % open. Open being the key word.
to express their feminine side, every man has a feminine side, but most don't express itQuote:
Originally Posted by BARBARA_MELENDEZ
I'm hetero.
Fully transitioned trans people dont bother me either. I'm not into outies.
Sorry if I'm too forward and bold here.
You never know. I love women, but I long for a gay sexual relationship. I wear women's clothes and want to be a woman... You never know...
I'm heterosexual but if I had a vagina I would go for the guys because I usually prefer their company over women. I find women to complicated and moody. Of course if I had a vagina I probably would find men to complicated and moody and want to go for the women if I had a penis. Life Sucks !
CindyoQuote:
Originally Posted by CINDYO
You could be describing me perfectly
I don't like to shop, at least for men's clothes
Could care less how the house is decorated for Christmas
As for Home decor I think my wife uses to many pillows LOL
I've been dressing of an on since I was 4 or 5, now 53. I do love to shop for Jill clothes, especially shoes! I'm happily married to my best friend, have 2 lovely daughters that I am looking forward to being provided grandchildren by and of course 100% hetero. A lot of the good qualities you have seen in your SO can be related to the balance of his masculine and feminine sides. I wouldn't worry about his sexual orientation any more now than you worried about prior to finding out he is a CD.
Hugs
Jill
Barbara has it right.Quote:
Originally Posted by BARBARA_MELENDEZ
Think about what difference does it really make percentage wise who does what and what gender they prefer? We all have dreams and maybe if we actually brought some of those dreams into our "real" life it would eliminate the excessive need to survey people and create percentages of a random selection of the population. The more that I read on here the more it makes me want to act on my suppressed fantascies. Please forgive me but I am tired of all the statistics and percentages in our lives.Live free and just be safe when you decide to live out your fantascies. You will never know if like someone or something unless you try it. Don't be a percentage in life, it is not the right way to live it.
Rebecca:)
Hi Cindyo,Quote:
Originally Posted by CINDYO
I know this is quite an old topic at this point, but I wanted to add to the pile anyway. :) I am, and have always been completely hetrosexual. No amount of crossdressing could make me attracted to guys. No situation could change my sexuality. I wouldn't worry that your SO is gay, just because you found out that he CDs. If you saw him oggling male models in women's magazines, only then might you have something to worry about.
More of the same, I am heterosexual. I have dressed for over fifty years, since I was ten, am happily married to the same woman for almost forty years. We have raised two normal, successful happy daughters.
Life is good.
Its obvious just from looking around that most CDers posting on the site are hetero. My impression is that maybe a few more are gay or bi than among non-CDers, but only a few and thats just my impression.
That is just this site o'course and "birds of a feather flock together" ... different CD sites do attract different kinds of people. But I have seen a bunch of them and not noticed that any particularly collect straight/gay/bi people.
Likewise I think the CDers we do hear from are probably pretty representative of those we dont hear from altho obviously none of us can prove that one way or another.
One thing tho... its easy to get the wrong impression because a lot of us (yes even those of us who are straight) have fantasies about doing it as a woman, with a man ... so you do have to answer the question "what does truly hetero mean?"
Personally I think if people get past their inhibitions most of them enjoy the actual act of doing it regardless of what sexes were the people involved. At least that seems to be true a lot of the time when people get drunk! :) And it is possible for two people of the same sex to love each other without sex being involved at all (ie best friends). So I think the only meaningful definition of straight/bi/gay has to be all about who you are attracted to. So most CDers, even those with fantasies about men, are still hetero.
First, Wiki is rampant with inaccuracies, so don't rely on that as a source. It's interesting reading, but over the years I've found quite a number of errors there. After all, anyone can edit and change their material. Which is great and terrible at the same time. Now back to our regularly scheduled topic.
There's no way to know exactly what percentage of us are 'strictly' heterosexual. If you really are suspicious of your mate having homosexual desires, you have to watch how he acts and behaves. Anyone watching me would easily know that I have no interest in men at all. If you want an easy test, put him on the beach and see what he looks at. Does he spend a large amount of time looking at guys even if there are spectacular looking women in scanty bathing suits around? That can tell you something. Is he able to determine easily how attractive a man is to women? (regular men, not movie actor quality, those are obvious). Does he constantly comment on how good some men look? Has he EVER said about another man 'Wow he's really hot!". All these are clues. Not definitive, perhaps, but it all gives you some idea about how interested he is in other men's appearance. Most guys.....don't give a crap about what other men look like. We don't notice their suits, can't tell you what shoes they wear, whether they're wearing a single or double breasted suit, nothing. We usually are lucky to be able to tell you what color shirt or suit he wears at all. I know, there are some men who are into fashion. But they are rare.