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http://www.atlantabridal.com/fashion...ringbearer.asp
This is a legitimate Wedding site. It is an interesting thread concerning some boys and young men who actually were dressed as bridsmaids and flower girls for real weddings.
As i had mentioned in a previous thread posting this Actually happens, and more often than one might think.
i wish it happened more.
What I found really strange that in almost all these stories I read in that link, that the boy bridesmaids were mostly between 5 and 10 years old, yet they went to a beauty salon to have "lipstick, eye shadow, nail polish and fancy updos" done. And in every case, they just "happend" to have long hair.
So, how come little boy bridesmaids get makeup done, but I have never seen little flower girls (of the same age) with all this makeup on? Maybe it is just me, but I would think it was pretty tacky to have a little child covered in makeup - boy or girl...
I think and see nothing wrong with this whole concept. But providing that the little boy would agree with this concept of dressing as a bridemaid or flower girl I would certainly not want to tramitize a little boy by making him dress this way if he did not But having been into St Louis this last Summer and having seen a few weddings down where i was doing my own paranormal research which is something very entirely different then most would be doing at all. But that is another story. But anyway about dresssing in and of this way I can and will say this dressing in little girl styles for a wedding is oh so very pretty the dresses and finery that girls get to wear that puts any boys clothing just to shame really. I myself if and when not a trans bride would love to dres s this way for formal occasions what have you the clothing just outshines anything that boys males can even attemp to wear. I certainly would rather dress this way. Oh what lilttel girls can and do get to really enjoy that's why i think we all are like this in oh so mnay ways we just love and do want to be like this. I know that i do. It is a reality fantasy of mine but oh well. Anything ot be a nice good girl. My oh my oh yeah. It is just the way to really be at least i think and agree it is for me anyway. How about you. I see nothing wrong with it if as i say the child would agree and oh how i wish it had been that way when i was a kid oh well. Suzy Ann!.
I also went to the link and read the posts. I was amazed by the large number of stories where this was alleged to have happened. I came away wondering how many were reality or how many were pure fantasy. Some seemed too 'perfect'. Not to say that it hasn't occurred, I just hesitate believing everything I read, especially when there is no photographic or other proof.
Kim
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kim E
Perhaps that is another reason I find these stories intriguing. A few sound like they were lifted directly from the pages of FICTIONMANIA---(or belong there N E way.) And despite many web searches I have yet to find ANY pictures. I AM willing to conceed that perhaps half of them are true, and although detailed, I suspect that the "Danny" story IS true. As a writer myself, some aspects of it, especially the end are not typical of "Fictionmania" fantasy type stories.-----
Frankly I think kids that age are too young to have to go through something like that. I've seen many websites where the lucky TG individual allegedly got to be a bridesmaid...voluntarily, I might add...but to expect a boy child to wear girls clothes in front of a large crowd when no doubt everyone in his peer group pressures the hell out of him to do boy things, act like a boy, hate on girls, etc, is really cruel and to an extent abusive, not to mention careless and hurtful.
Hi Marina ~
You as a writer, I'm sure are more experienced in being able to sort the wheat from the chaff, so to speak, than I will ever be. The reason I hesitated, was because I found it hard to believe that so many young boys would willingly accept a situation like that. I tried to pick just one, from a number of my relatives, friends and neighbor kids and couldn't come up with one that I feel, wouldn't outright refuse.
That said, if I had ever been approached with a scheme like that, I'd have set a land speed record getting to the front of the short line. Fill in for a flower girl, bridesmaid or for the bride herself, I wouldn't have had any problem with it, what so ever. But then, I always was different. :)
Hugs ~ Kim
I think this probably does happen to some degree, but I think there may be some instances where a mother may have really wanted a girl, but only ever had boys. As a result, they tend to treat that boy more as a the girl they never had. I see it in one of my kids classes at school - the mum has two sons, and one is treated more like a girl almost than a boy. The mum is very girly so to speak, and I'm sure she would have dearly wanted a girl to do girly things with, but since that's not possible, her son is the next best option. So I suspect some of these boys have been "groomed" for this type of thing, and no doubt probably results in some of them going on to be crossdressers.
Janelle
Well, in my opinion, it may have happened once or twice, but it still has to be extremely extremely rare. Look at what all these stoires have in common:
- a bridesmaid just "happens" to get hurt the week or day before the wedding.
- there is never anyone else to fill in but a boy
- the boy always has long hair, never wears a wig
- even though a very young child, gets the exact same treatment as older women (hair in an updo, full makeup, nails done, full underwear and dress, even high heels)
- in some extreme cases, a perm is given, ears pierced, even saw one that got acrylic nails at 7 years old
And have any of you been around brides? When they plan that day, every last detail is planned, they know it is their day - I really really doubt that a bride is going to let her perfect day be about anyone but her and her groom.
Sorry, I am dubious at this happening more than once or twice....
I started reading the posts on the linked page from the bottom up. Looks like fantasy spam to me.
If the author of the original article were saying it's an accepted and normal practice, then I might be encouraged. She didn't.
I have a eight year old nephew I think would jump at the chance of being a flowergirl or bridesmaid. It's his parents I don't think would go for it.
Amy
I have to agree. Most of the stories belong on a fiction story site. Some may be true but in most cases :nono: In fact as a writer myself, some show real promise 0.02 And, I just might use one for the basis of a story.
That this NEVER happened. At least not in a western country where there are so many gender - clothing - hang-ups. Crossdressing a child at a formal wedding would border on child abuse. What would the wedding couple do with their wedding pictures when their flower "girl" grows old enough to recognize his self? What clergyman would allow such a thing in "God's House" ? Some moms might dress up their little boys in their sister's clothes, at home for laughs, but at a public function, I doubt it... The whole idea is a no brainer.
I kinda have to agree with this...Quote:
Originally Posted by Steffie-Lee
I'll have to see more than one actual photo to believe it. ;)
I dont know about Bridesmaides, but I do know about flower girls! Many years ago at age 9 I was one in my Aunts wedding. Anyone wanting to know about the circumstances feel fre to ask.
details & pics please?Quote:
Originally Posted by jennifer marie
Wow - that would have been about 1960 then? Were you a flower girl in a dress, or just a boy in boy's clothes doing the flower gilr's role?Quote:
Originally Posted by jennifer marie
If you look at old Victorian and Edwardian pictures of kids here in the UK you will see that often a boy has girly curly hair and wears a dress like his sisters and it is only about the age of 5 or so when he is to go to school for the fist time that he has his hair cut short and has to wear trousers.
Hope this isn't off topic. Being naturally inquisitive I spent some time on google this morning. Closest thing I could find on this thread topic was 'womanless weddings'. Apparently they were common throughout the country back between the 20's and the 50's, and some even later. Men and boys played all the female roles in them, flower girls, bridesmaids and even the bride. They were usually big elaborate productions and were staged to earn money for fraternal, church and civic groups. There would be males today who were flower girls and bridesmaids when they were young, but in a theatre sense.
Perhaps this play acting of the past has bridged time and fostered this present day fantasy. Sort of like an urban legend, take a little truth, embellish it, bring it up to date and some will believe.
Kim
In victorian times the death rate of newborns was so high that it is true they dressed all children in the same style of clothes (that were passed down to the next to be born) up until the age when they were sure they would most likely survive often as late as five or six. or whenever they would begin school
Yes, I've heard of those. They were mainly done as a fundraiser, a comedy spoof sort of thing. ;)Quote:
Originally Posted by Kim E
You nailed it. That's exactly what this is - an urban legend. Anyone can write anything on the internet. I want to see some real photos before I'll believe any of it. ;)Quote:
Perhaps this play acting of the past has bridged time and fostered this present day fantasy. Sort of like an urban legend, take a little truth, embellish it, bring it up to date and some will believe.
Not exactly an urban legend as I am sure there have been a few occassions when very young boys have been passed off especially if money is on the tight side and there is a spare dress to be filled. But considering all the marriages that take place every year then this kind of activity probably happens about 0.0000000000000000000001% of the time. Basically about as often as meeting people who have been in outer space! Certainly the stories listed in the link have all the classic signs of being fantasy dreams.
Pics are *always* taken at weddings. Where are the pics?Quote:
Originally Posted by Helana
for the longest time boys till the age of 6 would wear dresses this at the younger age (1-4) faciliated the changing of diapers no pants to get in the way skirt up diaper off
ernest hemmingway wore dresses till the age of 5 and there are pictures out therte somewhere
Maddie