Printable View
I have a question for the married men who crossdress. Does your wife have a problem with it? Does it get in the way of your sex life? I was wondering. I read an article about a married man who struggled with crossdressing. Here it is:
www.leaderu.com/stonewall/pages/randall_w.html
If you believe the above comment about crossdressing being a sin to be true, then it is you yourself that you should be concerned with, and less so with what a SO may think. How do you even contemplate having sexual relations when you feel this way?Quote:
Originally Posted by Randall Wayne
Once you come to peace with yourself, everything else falls into place. I hope you find it.
Yes she does have a problem with it .... and what sex life???
Karren
I have been married for thirty two years and my wife has known for about 10 years. When I told her ,she said she had her suspisions and did not have any problems with it. We immediately went out and bought me some things that I desired. We have always had a great sex life and are still turned on to each other. If you are truly good friends besides being married then you probably stand a good chance of total acceptence. I really love womens clothes and it is a really big turn on to me to be totally dressed but I always make sure that my wife gets off at least twice and sometimes three times. I use oral as well as hand stimulation to help her get off several times before I get off and she loves it. To many men are just concerned about their sexual needs and not their wives or girlfriends. You get back out of a relationship what you are willing to put into it. Make sure you find what turns her on and focus on really pleasing her in those area,s. Being accepted for who you are and your turn ons will then be your partners goals. If not then seek someone who really cares about your happiness.Quote:
Originally Posted by HanesHerWay
Yes my wife has a problem with my X-dressing... She has known about it very quickly after our wedding. She tried to ignore it for many years, She thought it was a form of sexual fetishism, but when she realized it was full x-dressing she hated it...Quote:
Originally Posted by HanesHerWay
Yes it gets in the way of my sex life... Early on, we managed to have a pretty ordinary sex life, nothing exceptional but quite satisfactory. We even went through the "happy seventies" and the sexual revolution, open mariage etc... But as years passed the drive became ever lower and since my x-dressing was becoming more and more an obsession for me, she got completely turned off...
On the side of X-dressing, there have been some progress lately. My wife is integrating that side of my life a lot more and, without accepting completely, she is now far more open about it (it used to be a completely tabou subject).
On the sexual relation side, I think neither of us is interested in the other one anymore, so it is both way, not just her rejecting me...
We do have a lot of mutual love, but it isn't expressed physically...
But perhaps, after more than 38 years wedding and having known eac other five years before we actually got married, it is not surprising that the sex side has faded away...
:hugs:
Eugenie
The church sees crossdresing as not necessaraly a sin but an abberation, they cannot even make up their minds about women in the church let alone men who dress as women.
For me its simple if you dont like what they say get out its a society with rules and you are not gonna change em.
As for my wife she does not mind my dressing as long as I dont do it too much. As for sex I am married what chance do I get :p
I read the article when you posted the same link in another thread. It has nothing to do about how the wife wife feels and everything to do with how the husband sees it. If you see it as sin, then it is not right for you. For me, I'd be more concerned to what God is saying to me than what some other guy thinks.
Holly,
Moderator
Religion Discussion Section
Yes my GF of 5 years knows, is not bothered either way, i.e. she still sees me as me and the sex is good(i hope she'd agree:heehee:) when im charlotte or not:happy::happy:
'Lotti -x-
Interesting article. What works for him doesn't necessarily work for everyone though. And my wife knows, she's not best pleased with my CDing, but appreciates it's a part of me and loves me still for the whole of me.
My wife is OK with it. She even helps with some of my acquisitions but I have not dressed in front of her in about 5 years. It would be nice on occasion but for me it is more of a personal thing and enjoy doing it alone.
Ditto to Karren's answer.:straightface:
My wife knows of my dressing and is only tolerable. I can only dress when she is away from the house. All other aspects of our life are considered normal.
Wife supports my dressing. I took it slow, at her pace, but life is good now. We have a nice balance. As to the sex, well its been 8 hrs 13 minutes, but who's counting.....giggle.
Hugs.
SandyR
my so has known about it for about 15 years and well she calls me weirdo when i dress and that's about it.when she shops i shop for clothes and i let her know i will cd.
Told my wife before I proposed to her. She supports it and has no problems with it. Jocelyn
wife supports, buys, loves sex with carrol..blah blah....
My wife first learned about my dressing when we started dating about 16 years ago. I mainly dress alone, but when I do dress around her, it doesn't bother her.
A fascinating question! My wife is not keen on my cross-dressing at all - would rather not know what I'm up to - often seems to live in a state of denial. I have to assert myself a little like today 'I'm going out with the girls' not well received. Seems to think I do it because she's inadequate as a woman.Quote:
Originally Posted by will
However our level of communication has gone up loads and our sexlife is way way better. I am far more attentive to her needs now rather than my own needs. I will spend hours sometimes just rubbing her feet and stimulating her manually. So she seems to be getting the benefits of my CDing without even asking for them! Funny creatures women, aren't we!!
Mitch
I'm with Karren and Alice. I wish for better, but it's hard to be intimate when your wife rejects a part of your being, your inner self. It might help if we could discuss this, but she isn't interested.
My wife knows about the crossdressing and tolerates it, but would prefer I didn't. I sit around the house in the evening dressed and we talk and spend time together, but I don't go out dressed. We go shopping together and I will buy things. She is great and I appreciate her tolerance.
I cd with my wife or alone. My wife is very ok with it and is an active participant when we are together. Our sex life has changed due to age (it's exhausting) not for want. We are together because we love each other, not because we dress different or alike. Other people may have different views and that's ok. We try not to flaunt it, but are not ashamed of it.
My SO, has no problem with me in fem, she actualy enjoys the love making more now then ever.
I did not have te time to read the article or all the replies so I scimmed through,that said. I told my wife of 10 years about my dressing prior to our first date and we have a very good marriage and a healthy sex life for as much as her health allows anyway but it is not a problem,it is as she says "who I am" and I fell God made me this way so I see no wrong here.
My wife doesn't know, although she may suspect. She told me that she didn't want to know what went on in February when she spent 2 weeks in Portugal -- I spent two weeks in a skirt :) while the kids were at school.
As for the sex life, I'd say it's normal although she's the one with the bigger drive. But the CD'ing hasn't had any affect on it.
Kassandra
My wife and I are married 35yrs. I told my wife after 10yrs of marriage. To this day she has not seen me dressed, except for a couple halloween parties before I told her. She wants no part of my femme side. She is and has always been a very religious (Catholic) person. I am also Catholic but not really a practicing one. After I told her, at her urging I went and spoke to our pastor. He said that my crossdressing was not a sin and it was something that was between my wife and I. He also said that if Jesus met me he would say that he loved me. This helped my wife. At the time we had 3 children, we had two more after(they dont know). I struggled with my femme side on and off over the years. About 10 or 12 yrs ago I found inner peace. I get out about 1x a month and go shopping , parties and other events. Have a lot of CD friends.
Our sex life is good. The quality out weighs the quantity. I sometimes think about trying to bring Terri into the bedroom, but realize it might hurt what we have. My key word in my life at this pont is balance. I know that my femme side will always be there and just work to balance the different parts of me in my life.
Yours Terri