I'm taking ballet lessons!

Well, actually Jamie's male alter-ego is...

Here's the story: I found out about some local lessons for adult beginners. I e-mailed the instructor asking if her class would be appropriate for a thirty-something male with zero dance training (I decided not to mention my proclivity for CDing). She was very encouraging. Then I had to figure out how to bring it up with my wife. I was very nervous; even though she is fairly accepting, sometimes when I suggest new things related to my gender-identity, it can result in an outburst. I worried for two days, then finally worked up the courage just to invite her to take the class with me. She got a big smile and screamed "Yes!" So much needless worrying on my part! We've found a baby sitter, filled out the forms, and mailed in the check.

Today, I bought my first pair of ballet shoes. The lady at the dance store was very nice, and when she found out I taking a class for the first time said "You'll love it!" As this is an adult class, there is no dress code: the flyer says that "most adults wear sweatpants or stretch pants, but some wear tights and leotards." I think I'm going to play it somewhat conservative and just wear my (guy) running tights and a tee-shirt, at least until I see what other people in the class are wearing. Regardless, I will not be wearing a girl's uniform, no matter how much I might like to, but if many people dress professionally I may eventually work up to wearing a guy's leotard or unitard.

It's funny that this is something I've wanted to do for over ten years, but never had the courage to try. It seems like such a non-issue now, I wish I had signed up sooner. I hope it'll help me with grace, poise, posture, and muscle tone, while giving me a good workout in the process. Class starts in less than two weeks: I'll report back after my first class. If what I've heard is true, I'll be really sore.

Thanks for listening. I'm so excited, I just wanted to share it with people who might understand how I feel.

Sounds wonderful, Jamie! Have fun.

Good for you Jamie! Hope you and your wife have a really great experience with this. Keep us posted on how you get on, won't you? :)

(I've really taken to watching ballet performances over the last year....its a wonderful art!:battingeyelashes:)

Ballet is great exercise and also will help develop feminine grace and smoother motions. I wish I had the time for such ;) ENJOY!

That sounds like fun Jamie, let us know how it goes.

well done Jamie.. i hope you and your wife enjoy your new hobby / excersise... and there is always the role swap options if your wife gets seriously into it and gets a tutu.. ;)..

Cool beans Jamie.:thumbsup: As was already said, have fun.:)

Have a blast! I did this four years ago, in my mid-50s, and had a great time, learned a lot, and found out that Barishnikov I'm not. But, I was told, and later read, that women dancers generally like a man there as it changes the room dynamics--for the better. They cut me a lot of slack even though they were all better dancers than me. My class was for adult beginners and returning dancers and the class was mostly returning dancers which means these were women who studied dance from the age of five, stopped during college and then were back at it in their late 20s or earlier 30s. I never had a chance, but again had a great time, and recommend it to anyone so inclined.

Men's ballet tights are a lot like running tights (and not like women's tights) assuming your tights are solid black.

congratulations and have fun. Remember the soreness will go away.

I think you will enjoy this!!!

If the class closes and you strive for more, find a local Karate Dojo - you'll find VERY VERY many things in common with Ballet....

Our "dances" are called "Kata's" and involve blocks and punches but the same stretches are done in Karate.


But just enjoy it - that's a beautiful art!

I just got done with three dance company's and 9 nutcracker performances. I've thought about dance classes as a way to work on loosening up. and I found out a friend teaches kendo. something I have wanted to try for some time. Just call me Musashi. Carol

That's great Jamie! Keep us informed! Enjoy!

Yes it is exercise and a lot of balance.
I took ballet years ago, never was very good.

One thing you will hear a lot is about turnout. Listen, do NOT force this turnout unnaturally. That is how I messed up my right knee.
And don't be shocked when 5th position is super akward.

Lots of stretching is going to be in order.

So now for practice at home, time to get a leotard and some tights.

One thing if you get involved in the ballet community - they can be some real bitchy people. They probably would not harass a grown up as much but some of the younger female dancers love to bitch about each other, worse than other sub-cultures.

I have thought about Ballet Lessons before also, but always been afraid that this overweight middle aged person would be laughed at and embarrassed instead.

Jamie don't out do your wife too soon or she may have you quit

Play it to the hilt. Typical male ballet dance attire:
White compression t-shirt(Underarmor) dance belt(supporter) black tights, black ballet slippers. Tights are heavier than usual womens tights. Available online numerous places.
I took ballet lessons 3 times in the past, in my 20's and 30's. Adult beginner classes, females in the class had some training, I had none. Some women liked the idea of a male in the class, some did not..
Of course I would have loved to go to class dressed in the typical pink tights/black leotard pink ballets, but am satisfied to do that at home.
I do ballet exercises and strength training/stretching in all sorts of leotard/tights combinations, and just love it. You will too...

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Originally Posted by Karen Francis

Play it to the hilt. Typical male ballet dance attire:
White compression t-shirt(Underarmor) dance belt(supporter) black tights, black ballet slippers. Tights are heavier than usual womens tights. Available online numerous places.
I took ballet lessons 3 times in the past, in my 20's and 30's. Adult beginner classes, females in the class had some training, I had none. Some women liked the idea of a male in the class, some did not..
Of course I would have loved to go to class dressed in the typical pink tights/black leotard pink ballets, but am satisfied to do that at home.
I do ballet exercises and strength training/stretching in all sorts of leotard/tights combinations, and just love it. You will too...

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Now the females that did not like you there, what was their reaction to you?

I took flamenco lessons a few years ago. I noticed right away that the guys were taught a "macho" way of dancing and the ladies were different. I practiced the women's part on my own and realized the difference. The women are taught to dance with Grace. After that I studies the ladies styles and found that I learned to move in a softer and more feminine way. Great way to learn!

CAT

Good for you, Jamie G. You will enjoy it if your experience is like mine.

I joined my girlfriend's jazz/ballet class and was very welcome by her and the six other ladies one night a week for two years. I was in my early thirties too. If you want to wear leotards and tights, be in them at your very first class and don't look back. For my first class, I was in a black short sleeve zip front v-neck leotard and black tights. Be confident in them and you will be very welcome. I was expected to be in leotards from then on by the ladies. They even fussed at me when I was not. I wore some other styles later. My girlfriend bought me some I felt obligated to wear. And on a couple of nights I took class in some of her extra leotards and tights. But that's another story. Since I was the only guy, I fit right in wearing leotards with my troupe, and subtlely they treated me like just one of the girls. They even loaned me a wrap skirt to wear so I could learn the all girl dance routine for their recital. They thought it better than just standing around. We danced out of our skirts during the dance number. But I was always in male personna there. Afterall I was there as the boyfriend. But I did dance a recital piece with them in a black turtleneck leotard and jazz pants while they were all around me in their bodysuits and fishnets.

The sales agents in the dancewear shops assured me that most leotards are unisex even though they are sized for ladies. So as long as you choose solid dark colors, like black or navy with leotards that are basic you will be fine. Avoid leotards with built in bras and pinched fronts.

Hope you have as much fun as I did and enjoy wearing your leotards and tights in the dance studio.

Congratulations Jamie. Something I wanted to do while a bit younger, but can't turn the clock back now.

I was into karate for a number of years and was never in better shape than at that time. Only draw back was the black and blue bruises on arms and legs from practicing blocks while sparing. Might look a little odd if dressed with short sleeves or skirt.

A few years ago a GG lady friend and I took tango lessons. Don't claim to have learned much, but found following much easier than leading.

Just remember...., If you get REALLY GOOD there's always the Trocs! :daydreaming: http://www.trockadero.org/welcometolesball.html

Glenda

Sounds great! Enjoy your class.

I hate to bring this up, but some football players take up ballet, to develope balance and agility. Sometimes I think that it would do me some good just for everday life , since I trip over my own feet. Have fun and enjoy.

I've always wanted to go to a dance class. About 10 years ago (before I embraced my feminine side) I had two GG friends that used to go to tap dancing classes. I sooo wanted to go with them and they were somewhat (but not ecstatic) in encouraging me to go with them. Had I have gone I would have been the only guy in the class and everyone wore t-shirts and tights with tap shoes. Anyway, I am dead jealous of you and your wife going to ballet classes together. Keep us informed of how things progress :D

Thanks for the comments, everyone! A quick update: my first class is still a week away, so I don't have a lot to report yet. The other night, I tried out my proposed dance outfit: long sleeve white tee, black running tights and my black ballet slippers. I have long legs, so when I wear my running tights without socks the legs end well short of my ankle. They ended up looking like capri leggings! :o With the delicate slippers and that much ankle showing, it looked very girlish. I showed my wife and she broke out into laughter. She then explained that she wasn't making fun of me, but that I looked just like she and her friends dressed in college. I then took a suggestion from the lady at the dance store and put on some thin black socks. My wife thought this looked much better; more like a male dancer and less like a 90s co-ed. I'm thinking that instead of wearing the tights and the socks, I should just get some black footed dance tights. Imagine my disappointment that I might have to get some footed tights to look more masculine. :D

More to follow in one week's time.

About 30 years ago my wife and I took an adult ballet class together. It was fantastic!! It was my opportunity to wear ballet slippers, tights and a leotard. By taking ballet I could satisfy my crossdressing fetish out in public. Since those first ballet classes I have continued to purchase and wear ballet slippers, tights and leotards. I wear my Capezio Romeo black leather ballet slippers (soft) at home, at friends and relatives and when I stay in hotels while on business. I have 10 pairs of feminine ballet flats that I wear everywhere with ladies jeans and capris. Ballet class will open many doors for you. It will give you more confidence to show your feminine side.

I always thought boxing was like ballet, except there is no music, no choreography, and the dancers hit each other...

......jus' kiddn'...old joke we shared back in my martial arts days... By the way I agree with the comment made about similarities shared with ballet...

My mom was a ballerina (sp?), Only drawback is toe damage later in life...but hey, that is what "Power Scooters" are for, right?


HaveFun!!

Agsin I agree that wearing a leotard and tights and not looking back is the way to go because that is why you are there in the first place and that is what I did.

Looking forward to your report Jamie. I have also looked for classes for adult beginners, and found one yesterday. I called them today and after explaining what i had in mind they said I would be more than welcome to take a drop-in lesson next week. If I liked it I could then sign up for the rest of the term.

So this weekend I am going to find me at least a pair of ballet shoes.

Have fun in the class. I'm sore all over just reading about it though!

Hi Jamie:

I did this about 5 years ago. I called and found a beginner class about 50 minutes from home so I would not run into anyone. Bought a Bal Togs Gray Mens Tank Leotard and wore black women's dance tights that were opaque. I was very nervous and when I showed up the teacher pointed to a dressing room. I was worried that it might be unisex but everything was ok as it was for me.
When I presented myself to the teacher she had me join in the stretching on the floor with 5 other women all in black leotards and white tights and pink slippers. The teacher made an exception to make me comfortable and ready as usually they go straight to the barre.
I actually did ok and kept up with the class. I had done some ballet work before using Melissa Lowe's Ballet videos for instruction.
After class I signed up for the 3 month package. The second week there was a man who had already been in the class and so it was 2 guys and 5 women.

I decided from the first class to wear a leotard and tights under the Leotard like the ladies. I later found out that men were supposed to wear them over. Later I decided I wanted to match the other students so I wore a black Bal Togs mens tank or a Baltogs Cap Short Sleeve. I also wore capezio #9 full fashion convertible mesh seamed tights in white which I adore. However, the teacher thought they were too sheer and after one class sternly asked "who sold you those? ". I later figured out on my own that leg hair is a no no and wore a pair of nude color non seamed under the seamed white ones. You can also wear nude pantyhose as a first layer to hide leg hair as well or just shave. From time to time she tried to sell me mens tights and a unitard that looked like it had a white t shirt. I bought the tihgts and hated them. I wanted sheer back seams and wore them from then on with a layer underneath. I continued class for 9 months and also took a private class one day a week as well. In private I started wearing a ladies long sleeve scoup neck danskin or capezio.
I also from nude color New York City Ballet seamed tights which I love but are discontinued.

Class eventually wore me down and my lower back and toes really hurt me a lot. I later found out some years later I have a 15% deficit in both toes and so it became painful to dance. In addition as you will find students come and go and the last two women were very very good and thus the pace picked up and then I did not enjoy the class. You will not like it if the teacher calls you out in front of the class and says " I thought you cleaned that gleeside up last week" or when she puts you in a corner if you are slowing down the class.

I eventually quit for several reasons. First my back and toes were beat up so bad that going to my regular gym was a breeze. Second the round trip was 1.5 hours total. Third was I wanted to dance in pointe shoes and she tersely told me I was not ready. Fourth the individual classes for 1.5 hours and ended at later than they were supposed to. Fifth the class got out of hand with the two "ringers" that made me feel inferior when I was the lead dancer at the barre and could not follow anyone else. Finally was the fact that I wanted to dance as Martha and be in a pink leotard, tights and pink pointe shoes or black leotard and fishnet dance tights with a back seam all of which I own.

I have found a transformation service where the owner was a dancer at one time and teaches movement. I called and she would gladly have Martha and teach her tap and ballet so that is my next horizon.

One final bit of advice. If your wife supports you its great to take class with her. However, if you want to dress more and more like Jamie then suggest you take it by yourself. Your wife is good cover to get into the class but she will not be happy being the wife of the guy in the class trying to look femme.

Best Wishes All

Martha

Thanks for your comments Martha, it was very informative, it makes me want to take up both ballet and tap dancing!

Hi Jamie. I am Dee. Some 30 years ago (but who's counting) I was a student of mime and modern dance. It was the most delicious way to combine my desire to be feminine with fitness and a wonderful opportunity to be with women in ways where you are trated more as one of the girls. Once you are working out and focusing on the positions and the steps you will find that you are all in it together. By the very fact that you are studying dance, you will be treated better than if you were just some man. As for the movement and work itself - I have always enjoyed the grace it has given me and the ability to know exactly what my body is doing. If you want to look feminine in your movement and feel more feminine, then your dreams will come true. B ylearning about the lines and form of your own body and by watching in the mirror your can more easily train yourself to observe women better and emulate movement, posture and grace. Good luck and have fun...Dee

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By the very fact that you are studying dance, you will be treated better than if you were just some man

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So there is a stigma if you are a man but not studying dance at all?

Congratulations on deciding to take class. I have been taking adult recreational ballet classes for years now and I have found them to be an excellent way to stay in shape, and to improve me flexibility and stamina. Have made some very nice acquaintences in my classes over the years. :)

There is a stereotype that dancing is not for men. I make this observation on the clubs and events I have been too have involved only women actually dancing while the males are mostly just standing there barely shuffling their feet.
Dancing is more than just shuffling your feet. Men do this because it's not manly to do real dancing.
I hope this is gang banger thug thing. Otherwise, men really can't dance because of severe cultural restrictions. It's like they are just there.

Hi:

Anyone shop either in person or on line at any CD friendly dance shops for your ballet attire. If so which ones are good?

Martha: I have shopped dance store in person, but it is hit or miss on how much you may be welcome in them. So I use Discount Dance Supply (www.discountdance.com), a true on-line discount dancewaer house, just like their name says. They carry just about anything you could want for dance clothing and their prices are very reasonable. I get most of my stuff from them.

Hi Sarah:

I have the same experience. Hit me with an e mail as I do not have enough posts to do the same.

Would be great to stay in touch.

What happened to Jamie? We never heard back from her about her lessons?

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Originally Posted by marthaCD

What happened to Jamie? We never heard back from her about her lessons?

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I'm still here. I've just been posting the reports in a different thread. See Report from My First Ballet Lesson. I'll keep giving status updates there.